Last weekend, I had the longest day in office. I came in office by Friday morning on 20th and left on Saturday morning on 21st. Almost 24 hours. That was really tiring. At the end of the day, my eyes were sore, I was crying in hunger and yet; I wanted to sleep desperately.
Despite my physical hardships, what worried me was the fact that I couldn't join my parents at my native place. No, this was not just another casual trip to home. This was the most meaningful trip I was supposed to take for home in a long time.
The sarppakkavu (temple of snake goddess) at my home was having a restoration for the last one month. It's normally renovated every 25 years. Saturday was the day when the punaprathishta ( placing the idol back again after restoration) was to be held. And I couldn't join them.
When I called my parents that day morning, I almost burst out into tears. I missed such an important function only because I had a project package release the previous day. Despite the fact that Saturday was a holiday in office, I had to be there the whole morning. And so I missed out such a big event.
It was big, definitely. It involved spending a huge amount, a couple of hundred thousand rupees; even the feast served for the day was for approx 500 visitors. And I was not there. What else can I miss the most in life.
Lately I started thinking how satisfying is a job. Surely it pays well. It's my bread and butter. But how good can it be, if it stops me from being with my family when I'm needed there the most. A government job would have been far better, though it pays less. Atleast it won't interfere with my personal life.
I'm dead now. Its not the loss of sleep that killed me. But its my job pressure. I no longer like my job now. It made me mechanical, it made me good for nothing but only for working. It made me stop dreaming and praying. It made me think technically and not philosophically. I see the old me staying with my parents, having fun and enjoying. And I miss the old me, infact I miss myself.
