- Swing when you're winning -

I will talk Hollywood will listen
I wouldn't be so alone
The they knew my name in every home
Kevin Spacey would call on the phone
But I'd be too busy
Come back to the old five and dime
Cameron Diaz give me a sign
I'd make you smile all the time
Your conversation would compliment mine

I will talk and Hollywood will listen
See them bow and my every word
Mr Spielberg look just what you're missing
Doesn't that seem a litte obsurd
Bow at my every word

Buy up the rights to my book
Live on a ranch from what the box office took
I'll go and visit the set
They'll call me their saviour
All other people will scorn the celebrity who (?)
Lives on the moon
But, I'll be back home in June
To promote the sequel

I will talk and Hollywood will listen
See them bow and my every word
Mr Spielberg look just what you're missing
Doesn't that seem a litte obsurd
Bow at my every word

Mack the knife
Oh, the shark has pretty teeth, dear
And he shows 'em, pearly white
Just a jack knife has Macheath, dear
And he keeps it, keeps it way out of sight

When that shark bites with his teeth, dear
Scarlet billows, they begin to spread
Fancy white gloves though has Macheath, dear
So there's rarely, never one trace of red

On the sidewalk, one Sunday mornin'
Lies a body oozin' life
Someone's sneaking 'round the corner
Could that someone, perhaps, perchance, be Mack the Knife?

From a tugboat  on the river goin' slow
A cement bag, it is dropping down
Yeah, the cement  is just for the weight, dear
You can make a large bet Macheath is back in town

My man Louie Miller, he split the scene, babe
After drawin' out all the bread from his stash
Now Macheath spends  just like a pimp, babe
Do you suppose that our boy, he did something rash?

Ah, old Satchmo, Louis Armstrong, Bobby Darrin
They did this song nice, Lady Ella too
They all sang it, with so much feeling
That Old Blue Eyes, he ain't gonna add nothing new

But with Quincy's big band, right behind me
Swinging hard, Jack, I know I can't lose
When I tell you, all about Mack the Knife babe
It's an offer, you can never refuse

We got George Benson, we got Newman & Foster
We got the Brecker Brothers, and Hampton's bringing up the rear
All these bad cats, and more, are in the band now
They make the greatest sounds, you ever gonna hear

Hey Sookie Taudry, Jenny Diver, Polly Peachum, Old Miss Lulu Brown
Oh the line forms, on the right dear
Now that Macheath, I mean that man Macheath
Yeah he's bad, mercy mercy
Yeah he's badder than old Leroy Brown
You better lock your door, and call the law
Because Macheath's, that bum,
He's back in town

Somethin' Stupid
I know I stand in line until you think you have the time
To spend an evening with me
And if we go someplace to dance, I know that there's a chance
You won't be leaving with me
And afterwards we drop into a quiet little place and have a drink or two
And then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like "I love you"

I can see it in your eyes
That you despise the same old lies you heard the night before
And though it's just a line to you, for me it's true
And never seemed so right before

I practice every day to find some clever lines to say
To make the meaning come through
But then I think I'll wait until the evening gets late and I'm alone with you
The time is right, your perfume fills my head, the stars get red and, oh, the night's so blue
And then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like "I love you"

The time is right, your perfume fills my head, the stars get red and, oh, the night's so blue
And then I go and spoil it all by sayin' something stupid like "I love you"

I love you
I love you
I love you

Fade

Do nothing till you hear from me
Do nothing till you hear from me
Pay no attention to what's said
Why one should tear the seam of anyone's dream
Is over my head

Do nothing till you hear from me
At least consider our romance
If you should take the word of others you've heard
I haven't a chance

True, I've been seen with someone new
But does that mean that I'm untrue?
While we're apart, the words in my heart
Reveal how I feel about you

Some kiss may cloud my memory
And other arms may hold a thrill
But please do nothing till you hear it from me
And you never will!

It was a very good year                                                                                                                                             When I was seventeen it was a very good year
It was a very good year for small town girls and soft summer nights
We'd hide from the lights on the village green
When I was seventeen

When I was twenty-one it was a very good year
It was a very good year for city girls who lived up the stair
With all that perfumed hair and it came undone
When I was twenty-one

Then I was thirty-five it was a very good year
It was a very good year for blue-blooded girls
Of independent means, we'd ride in limousines their chauffeurs would drive
When I was thirty-five

But now the days grow short, I'm in the autumn of the year
And now I think of my life as vintage wine from fine old kegs
From the brim to the dregs, and it poured sweet and clear
It was a very good year

It was a mess of good years

Straighten up and fly right
A buzzard took a monkey for a ride in the air,
The monkey thought that everything
was on the square.
The buzzard tried to throw the monkey
off his back,
The monkey grabbed his neck and said,
"Now listen, Jack..."

Straighten up and fly right,
Straighten up and fly right
Straighten up and fly right
Cool down, papa, don't you blow your top.
Ain't no use in divin',
What's the use in jivin'?
Straighten up and fly right
Cool down, papa, don't you blow your top.

The buzzard told the monkey,
You're chokin' me.
Release your hold and I'll set you free.
The monkey looked the buzzard right
dead in the eye and said,
Your story's so touching, but it sounds
jes' like a lie.

Straighten up and fly right
Straighten up and stay right
Straighten up and fly right
Cool down, papa, don't you blow your top.

Straighten up and fly right
Straighten up and stay right
Straighten up and fly right
Cool down, papa, don't you blow - your - top.

Fly right!

Well did you evah
Have you heard, among this clan,
I am called "The forgotten man"?
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!
Have you heard the story of
Dexter boy being gypped by love?
Well, did you evah!
What a swell party this is!
What frails, what frocks!
What furs, what rocks!
What gaiety!
It's all too exquis!
That French champagne!
So good for the brain!
That band, it's the end!
Kindly don't fall down, my friend,
Have you heard? Professor Munch
Ate his wife and divorced his lunch.
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!
Have you heard? The countess Krupp
Crossed the bridge when the bridge was up.
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!

Refrain

Have you heard that Mimsie Starr
Just got pinched in the Astor bar?
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!
Have you heard that Uncle Newt
Forgot to open his parachute?
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!
It's great, it's grand!
It's wonderland!
What soup, what fish!
That beef, what a dish!
That grouse, so rare!
That old camembert!
That baba au rhum!
Will you please move over, chum?
Have you heard the poor dear Blanche
Got run down by an avalanche?
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!
Have you heard? It's in the stars
Next July we collide with Mars.
Well, did you evah?
What a swell party this is!

Mr Bojangles
I knew a man Bojangles
And he'd dance for you
In worn out shoes

With silver hair a ragged shirt
And baggy pants
He would do the old soft shoe

He would jump so high
Jump so high
Then he lightly touch down

He told me of the time he worked with
Minstrel shows travelling
Throughout the south

He spoke with tears of fifteen years
How his dog and he
They would travel about.

But his dog up and died
He up and died
And after twenty years he still grieved

He said "I dance now
At every chance in the Honky Tonks
For my drinks and tips

But most the time I spend
Behind these country bars
You see on I drinks a bit"

Then he shook his head
Oh lord when he shook his head
I could swear I heard someone say please

Mister Bojangles
Call him Mister Bojangles
Mister Bojangles come back and dance please

Come back and dance again Mr Bojangles

One for my baby
It's quarter to three, there's no one in the place except you and me
So, set 'em up, Joe, I got a little story you oughta know
We're drinkin', my friend, to the end of a brief episode
Make it one for my baby and one more for the road

I got the routine, so drop another nickel in the machine
I'm feelin' so bad, wish you'd make the music pretty and sad
Could tell you a lot, but you've got to be true to your code
So, make it one for my baby and one more for the road

You'd never know it but buddy, I'm a kind of poet
And I got a lot of things to say
And when I'm gloomy, you simply gotta listen to me
Till it's all talked away

Well that's how it goes and Joe, I know your gettin' pretty anxious to close
So, thanks for the cheer, I hope you didn't mind my bendin' your ear
This torch that I found must be drowned or it soon might explode
So, make it one for my baby and one more for the road
That long, long road

Things
Ev'ry night I sit here by my window (window)
Starin' at the lonely avenue (avenue)
Watching lovers holdin' hand 'n' laughin' (laughin')
And thinkin' 'bout the things we used to do

Chorus

(Thinkin' of things) Like a walk in the park
(Things) Like a kiss in the dark
(Things) Like a sailboat ride
(Yeah-yeah) What about the night we cried?
Things like a lover's vow
Things that we don't do now
Thinkin' 'bout the things we used to do

Memories are all I have to cling to (cling to)
And heartaches are the friends I'm talkin' to (talkin' to)
When I'm not thinkin' of-a just how much I love you (love you)
Well, I'm-a thinkin' 'bout the things we used to do

Chorus

I still can hear the jukebox softly playin' (playin')
And the face I see each day belongs to you (belongs to you)
Though there's not a single sound and there's nobody else around
Well, it's-a just me thinkin' of the things we used to do

Chorus

And the heartaches are the friends I'm talkin' to
Ya got me thinkin' 'bout the things we used to do

Fade

Starin' at the lonely avenue

Ain't that a kick in the head
How lucky can one guy be?
I kissed her and she kissed me
Like the fella once said,
"Ain't that a kick in the head?"
The room was completely black,
I hugged her and she hugged back
Like the sailor said, quote,
"Ain't that a hole in the boat?"

My head keeps spinnin',
I go to sleep and keep grinnin'
If this is just the beginnin',
my life is gonna be bee-yoo-tee-ful

I've sunshine enough to spread,
it's just like the fella said
Tell me quick, ain't love a kick in the head?

Like the fella once said,
"Ain't that a kick in the head?"
Like the sailor said, quote,
"Ain't that a hole in the boat?"

My head keeps spinnin',
I go to sleep and keep grinnin'
If this is just the beginnin',
my life is gonna be bee-yoo-tee-ful

She's tellin' me we'll be wed,
she's picked out a king-size bed
I couldn't feel any better or I'd be sick
Tell me quick oh, ain't love a kick?
Tell me quick ain't love a kick in the head?

They can't take that away from me
There are many, many crazy things
That will keep me loving you,
And with your permission
May I list a few?

The way you wear your hat.
The way you sip your tea.
The memory of all that -
No, no - they can't take that away from me.

The way your smile just beams.
The way you sing off-key.
The way you haunt my dreams.
No, no - they can't take that away from me.

We may never, never meet again
On that bumpy road to love
Still I'll always,
Always keep the memory of:

The way you hold your knife (do-do-do-do do-do).
The way we danced until three.
The way you've changed my life.
No, no - they can't take that away from me.
No, they can't take that away from me.

Have you met miss Jones
Have you met Miss Jones
Someone said as we shook hands
She was just Miss Jones to me

Then I said Miss Jones
You're a girl who understands
I'm a man who must be free

And all at once I lost my breath
And all at once was scared to death
And all at once I own the earth and sky

Now I met Miss Jones
And well keep on meeting till we die
Miss Jones and I

And all at once I lost my breath
And all at once was scared to death
And all at once I own the earth and sky

Now I met Miss Jones
And well keep on meeting till we die
Miss Jones and I
Miss Jones and I

Miss Jones and I

Me and my shadow
Like the wallpaper sticks to the wall
Like the seashore clings to the sea
Like you'll never get rid of your shadow
Frank, you'll never get rid of me

Let all the others fight and fuss
Whatever happens, we've got us.

Me and my shadow
We're closer than pages that stick in a book
We're closer than ripples that play in a brook
Strolling down the avenue
Wherever you find him, you'll find me, just look
Closer than a miser or the bloodhounds to Liza

Me and my shadow
We're closer than smog when it clings to L.A.
We're closer than Bobby is to J.F.K.
Not a soul can bust this team in two
We stick together like glue

And when it's sleeping time
That's when we rise
We start to swing
Swing to the skies
Our clocks don't chime
What a surprise
They ring-a-ding-ding!
Happy New Year!

Me and my shadow
And now to repeat what I said at the start
They'll need a large crowbar to break us apart
We're alone but far from blue

Before we get finished, we'll make the town roar
We'll make all the late spots, and then a few more
We'll wind up at Jilly's right after Toot's Shore
Life is gonna be we-wow-whee!
(here comes the party!)
For my shadow and me!

Say Frank?
What is it, Sam?
Do me a favor?
What do you want, now?
Would you mind taking it, just one more time?
From the top?
No! From the ending!
Wonderful!

And while we are swinging, to mention a few
We'll drop in at Danny's, The Little Club too
But wind up at Jilly's, whatever we do
Life is gonna be we-wow-whee!
(Wow!)
For my shadow and me!

Frank?
Oh, forget it Sam.

Beyond the sea
Somewhere beyond the sea
Somewhere waiting for me
My lover stands on golden sands
And watches the ships that go sailing

Somewhere beyond the sea
He's watching for me
If I could fly like birds on high
Then straight to his arms I'd go sailing
It's far beyond a star, it's near beyond the moon
I know beyond a doubt
My heart will lead me there soon

We'll meet beyond the shore
We'll kiss just as before
Happy we'll be beyond the sea
And never again I'll go sailing
Some sailing