Split infinity The darkness was warm, comforting, and deep. Jane Carmandy wished that she could stay in it forever, but the spear of light that tugged at her eyelids was not to be denied. ‘Beepbeep! Beepbeep! Beepbeep!’ Slowly her sleep-fogged mind realized that it was the alarm clock- calling her back from the wonderful void. Reaching her arm out, she groped around for the button that would turn off the noise, but couldn’t find it. Still unwilling to abandon the hope of more rest, she groaned and shoved the pillow over her head. Sleep was becoming more and more precious to Jane; hours seemed to turn into minutes, and no matter how long she slept, rest was scarce. Jane Carmandy was determined to get as much as possible. Sighing, she realized it was useless and propped herself up on her elbows. She could see the alarm on the floor where it had fallen during her blind searching. Another casualty of war, she thought grimly as she noticed the spilled glass of water that had also been knocked off the nightstand. Jane gathered her jelly-like muscles, and half hauling, half rolling, sat up. Another school day… yippee. Stumbling over to the bathroom, She turned the ‘cold’ knob on the sink and shoved her head beneath it. She felt the spasm move through her like a wave of ice- which, essentially, was what it was. Not exactly the most pleasant way to wake up, but it was only way to fully shake the last vestiges of sleep from her unresponsive muscles at 5:00 in the morning. She looked up and caught a glimpse of her face in the mirror. Short scraggly red hair, freckles in all the wrong places, a nose bordering on large, and deep blue eyes that seemed strangely out of place on her. She glanced at the clock- quarter of six… where had the time gone? Oh well; she grabbed her backpack and dashed out the door. She had just made it to the bus stop when she saw the bright yellow behemoth coming over the hill. It stopped in front of her. Jane had always thought of herself as lucky- she had never missed anything by less than ten minutes. She climbed up the steps onto the carriage of doom- at least that was what she called it. She would never go so far as to actually criticize the bus driver, but Mrs. Bobbi Mcdanson drove like a race car driver. She was always trying to be in front of all the other cars on the road and to get to school twenty minutes early, traffic laws and pedestrians be damned. After several sudden stops, sharp turns, and a near miss involving a semi, Jane got off the bus and ran into the building. No matter how quickly Miz. Bobbi drove, the bus always seemed to arrive late. She had to hurry if she planned on getting to class on time. She struggled with the combination on her locker for a minute and finally managing to jiggle it open, grabbed the correct books. Dashing up the stairs, she ran straight into Mr. Johnson, the attendance clerk and unofficial school disciplinarian. He looked down on her disdainfully. “You’re in quite a rush this morning” he said frowning and crossing his hands over his chest. “I’m sorry sir” Jane said, looking at the floor. “It’s just that I’m late for class, and the bus came late, and-“ her voice rose in pitch and volume “my locker wouldn’t open, and I’m really, really sorry. Please,” at this point she broke into tears “don’t punish me! I’ll never run in the halls again, I promise!” Realizing that others might hear this little display and get the wrong idea, Johnson quickly backed off. “As long as you don’t do it again.” He said through his teeth. The little manipulator; this happens every day; and then, seeing the looks coming from some of the on-looking teachers, he quickly added “Don’t cry, it’s okay, please don’t cry.” Jane at this point was sitting on the steps, sobbing her heart out. Johnson caught another glare or two from passing teachers, and decided he’d better get away before things got any more embarrassing. He took a last look at Jane and thought ‘if only she wasn’t the universal teacher’s pet… even the ones she doesn’t have classes with adore her (though I can’t see how).’ Trying to seem casual, he hurried away. Jane dried her eyes and lounged on the stairs for a while. She’d seen her first period teacher watching the little fiasco; Ms. Ralegh would probably think she was still being picked on by the big bad Mr. Johnson, and give her an excused tardy. She hated deceiving people, and it wasn't that she wanted to act like a crybaby; it was just that she knew Johnson had a weakness for crying girls. It was the only weakness he had so she had better exploit it if she planned on making it through the day without being sent to the principal's office. I should go into acting Jane thought bitterly as she made her way to class. DING!! DING!! DING!! DING!! DING!! No matter how many times she heard it, the bell still made her jump. What was it, only three feet this time? she guessed. Ms. Ralegh was still giving out the math homework when the class began to disperse. Jane took her time walking to the door, preferring to wait until the river of students had faded to a trickle of stragglers jokingly pushing each other against the walls. Jane had just cleared the doorway when she felt a stabbing pain in her head. She gasped and held her hands to her temples, praying it would go away. Her prayer must have been heard, because the headache suddenly vanished as quickly as it had come. Shaking her head to clear it , she made her way down the hall. “Hey, Jane!” Jane looked around to see where the hail was coming from. “I heard you made the basketball team!” A tall lanky black-haired guy Jane didn’t recognize grinned at her. “Um… yeah, I guess I did.” Jane didn’t remember anyone saying the list was posted, but she made a mental note to check for it- just to make sure the guy wasn’t pulling her leg. She inched away, not really wanting to talk to him right now. “I Guess I’ll see ‘ya round!” he called out to her, swaggering off in the other direction. That was weird Jane mused as she turned the corner and entered the English classroom. She felt another slight pain in her head, and considered going to the nurse’s office, but then she remembered there was a big quiz today and everyone in the class had ‘better not miss it or else’. Jane entered the classroom and sat down at her desk. She pulled out her homework, and passing it up to the front of the room, noticed a funny little white spot playing tag with her vision. It must have something to do with the headaches she thought to herself, maybe I am sick. The teacher was standing in the front of the room, humming to himself and watching the students file in. “What is it, Jane?” he muttered. Jane debated the possible answers she could give. Saying she was seeing little white spots could either get her lectured at about making up excuses to go see the nurse, or it could get her rushed to the hospital. Saying she had a head ache would get her laughed at for over-reacting. “I feel sick; I think I have the flu.” It wasn’t exactly a lie; headaches were a flu symptom, but she felt miserable saying it anyway. “Um, are you sure? There isn’t going to be another chance to take the quiz.” Jane noticed another spot had added itself to the first. “I know, but I think I’m really getting sick” It was true, too. Even though years of therapy had cured her of her hypochondria, she knew these spots couldn’t be a good thing and was getting worried. Jane gladly accepted the pass from her English teacher and headed for the nurse’s office, all the while trying not to think about what headaches and white spots could be symptoms of. It could be a stroke, but wasn’t she a little young for that? Was she going blind? Maybe it was… no, no, NO! She forcibly halted her train of thought; no point making things worse. With a trembling hand, she turned the doorknob and pushed open the heavy wooden door of the nurse’s office. “May I help you?” a pleasant voice inquired from within the room. “I think I need to lie down for a while.” Jane said as quietly as she could. She didn’t know why, but the nurse scared her. “Oh Jane, It’s you. There’s a cot in the back. What’s wrong?” “I’m seeing white spots” Jane blurted out, so worried about what might be wrong with her, she had forgotten to be worried about the nurse. “Oh, my. That’s strange,” said the nurse pleasantly. “well lie down for a while, and if they haven’t gone away soon, We’ll see what else we can do.” Jane lay down on the cot and closed her eyes. She felt a twinge of pain in the right side of her head and winced. This wasn’t working. Maybe some aspirin would do the trick. “Oh Jane?” Jane looked at the plastic curtain covering the doorway the nurse had yet to come out of. A hand poked out, holding a bottle of something, “here’s some aspirin for your headache. There’s a water fountain across the hall. Jane thanked her politely and went to go get something to wash the pills down with. Suddenly she froze and realized something was terribly wrong with what the nurse had just said. Unfortunately she didn’t have a clue what that might be; just that cold feeling you get when you remember you’ve forgotten something vital, but can’t for the life of you figure out what it is that you’ve forgot. Conceding defeat, she shook her head to clear it (this seemed to be becoming a more and more frequent occurrence today), took a drink, and downed the tablets. Almost immediately, she felt the difference. “I feel better now, thank you.” She said to the nurse, going back in the room and setting the aspirin box on the desk. Jane grabbed her stuff and hurried back to class. If she was quick, she might be able to get back in time to take the quiz… DING! DING! DING! DING!… or not. She had already missed most of two classes- a blemish on her near-perfect record- and she had no intention of making it three. Jane set out at a brisk pace for the stairway, trying to get as far as she could before the hourly stampede. She saw the basketball coach walking in the other direction, and seizing her opportunity, asked her if she had made the team. “Just can’t wait for that list to be posted, can you Jane” the coach smiled. “Don’t worry, we haven’t decided yet, but I’m sure you did fine.” She said, and gave Jane a quick wink. “Oh…okay.” said Jane softly. The guy in the hall was a good liar; she wondered who he was. Having lost her chance at a head start in the hall way, Jane decided now was as good a time as any to take a side trip to the bathroom. Pushing her way through the hordes of students (most of them pushing back), she made her way over to the ladies room. Even as she opened the door, she saw the newest addition the graffiti wall… oh, great. Upsetting as it was to be said to be in love with your vice principal, Jane was sure the pranksters hadn’t meant to do anything mean- they were just making a joke. Still, Jane no longer felt the need to use the bathroom, and quickly went back out into the hall, ignoring the sniggering girls outside. Jane had almost pushed her way to the steps, when she a reflection on the glass doors in front of her. There was an odd looking man in tattered brown leather coming up behind her; was he was going to attack her!? She turned around and prepared to run, when she saw there was no one there. Weird. Maybe the aspirin was having side effects; she’d heard some people had those kind of re-actions. Oh, well. Maybe she was going crazy, she knew she was accepting all this too calmly. I’m too young for these things to be happening. I’m going to die, and no one will know or care. They’re going to send me to an institution, and I’ll spend the rest of my life as a lunatic and it’s not my fault! I AM CALM!!!! Jane was almost repeating the scene on the stairs with mr. Johnson, only this time it was all in her head, and she really ment it when she started to cry. Why is this happeninng to me? It should be someone else, but no. It’s me and I’m going to die. I;m going to ceace to exist, and nowone will care. The room performed a slow, deliberate loop-the-loop and stopped at a slightly cockeyed angle. Jane was getting more frightened by the second, so when a terrible pain shot throo her head, she didn’t even cry out, she just colapesd against the wall and sobbed. She could see the crowd, going about their buissness as if nothing was rong… don’t they see me? Don’t they kare!? She felt another stab of pain, worse than all the others and her vision started to fayd. The last thing Jane Carmandy saw or felt before loosing conshiousness was a shove by won of the people inn the hall; still hurreying to get to klass in thyme… ***^^^*** The darkness was warm, comforting, and deep. Jane Carmandy wished that she could stay in it forever, but the spear of light that tugged at her eyelids was not to be denied. “Oh, good. You’re awake.” A woman’s face hovered over her. “Wha- What…?” Jane was having trouble getting her mouth to move the right way. She tried again “What happened?” The woman helped her sit up, and gently steadied her. Jane could see that the small room she was in was all metal with bright fluorescent lights in the walls and ceiling. Strange machines were all around, and she was on a metal bed of some kind. “The procedure was a success; congratulations.” “pro- procedure? Where am I? What procedure?” “Oh, don’t worry, all our patients are confused at first, but everything will make sense soon.” The woman reminded Jane of the school nurse- overly pleasant, but at the same time somewhat vacant. “You have just served your sentence for murder, assault and battery, grand theft, possession of contraband weapons, and unauthorized transport of illegal goods.” The woman said calmly. Jane’s eyes went wide “You can’t be serious! I’m just a kid. I haven’t done any of that stuff, and I never would!” “oh, don’t worry, of course you don’t remember doing it, all memories of your life and yourself are suppressed. And as for being ‘just a kid’…” The nurse handed Jane a mirror. The woman in the mirror staring back at her in shock had long dark blonde hair, a narrow face, high angular cheekbones, and deep blue eyes that seemed to fit perfectly. It wasn’t right… it wasn’t her… it couldn’t be… yet it felt strangely familiar; it felt… right. Jane felt blackness close in on her again and fainted. When she regained consciousness, the same woman was leaning over her, with that same pleasantly concerned look on her face. “This is a dream” Jane said quietly. “This whole day was a dream. This is all some- some figment of my imagination, and when I wake up, I’m going to have a normal day, and go on living my normal life… because this is all some big nightmare and nightmares are perfectly normal. I’m going to wake up now. See?” Jane selected a spot on her hand and pinched it with her fingernails… hard. “ow, ow, ow!” Blood started to well to the surface and Jane cringed. She stared at the offending fingernails in horror. They were much longer than well cared for nails had a right to be, and sharper too. There was dirt encrusted beneath them, and Jane found herself wondering when they had last been washed. Jane put the wound to her mouth. “Okay…” She shakily to herself “this is a dream, I just can’t wake up yet.” “Don’t worry,” The nurse soothed “it’s perfectly normal for patients to have these fits when they first wake up. These feelings will soon pass.” Jane looked at her incredulously. “It will all be all right, you’ll see.” The nurse held out something that looked like a blue rubber ball; Jane took it and stared at it stupidly. What was she supposed to do with it, see how high she could get it to bounce? The nurse pushed a button on her chair and suddenly Jane’s hand went numb. She began to panic as she lost the feeling in her arm and the tingly nothingness spread throughout the rest of her body. “Wh-why are you- you d-d-doing this t-to me!?” stuttered Jane as she lost the feeling in her mouth and with it the ability to move it at all. “Oh, don’t worry. This is all standard procedure.” Jane couldn’t move, so she couldn’t pull away or even respond as the woman put a metal headband on her and began to press buttons. She felt a tingling at her temples and then the tingling blossomed into waves of pure agony. She tried to scream, but all she could get out of her unresponsive mouth was a gurgle. It felt like someone was drilling holes in her head. From somewhere through the haze of pain, she heard an alarm. It was joined by another, and another; each of a different pitch and speed. Someone was shouting, something about an attack and a hand-basket. The woman frantically began pushing buttons on the headband and gradually, the pain began to recede. The last thing she saw before she blacked out was an odd looking man in tattered brown leather standing over her with a hard look on his face. *** “Well, well, well. Look who’s back in the land of the living.” She was in a small sparsely furnished room and the man she'd seen before was leaning against a wall. “Just relax. How're you doing?” Jane just groaned. Here she was, surrounded by strangers who were all trying to kill her, stuck in a dream where she wasn't even herself, and… “What is it with you people!? Do you think the only way to get me from place to place to place is to knock me out? If you're going to kill me, just get it over with.” It came out more forcefully than she had meant, and, realizing these people might just take her at her word, she hastily added an “I'm sorry! Please don't hurt me!” "Whoa, take it easy, Liss.” The man walked over to the bed on which she sat and sat down next to her. Jane flinched but did not pull away. There was something comforting about his presence, and she knew instinctively he was not going to hurt her. “Who's trying to hurt you? I'm not that sore at you!” “What are you talking about? Who's Liss? I don't even know you!” “You're Lissel! …What do you mean, 'don't know me'!?” He looked at her in disbelief, and saw she wasn’t pulling his leg. He put one hand on her shoulder and looked into her eyes. “oh, god. What have they done to you?” Desperately needing someone to talk to about all this, Jane told him everything. “Okay,…Jane… let’s start from the top. You’re Lissel. Merc and general cash scrounger extraordinare. I’m Jarshe. “We used to be close friends-“ Jane remembered her body wasn’t that of a kid anymore. “How close?” Jane asked slowly, dreading the answer. He caught her meaning. “Not that close. We used to be a team along with Ris-“ Ris?” “Yeah, she’s our pilot, and I couldn’t ask for a better one. She’s a little weird though.” He whispered confidentially. “Pilot- you mean we’re in a plane?” “What tech level were you living in!? We’re on a ship… y’know, in space?” This was all sounding like Star Wars or something. Oh, well. It was only a dream and she would wake up soon, so it didn’t matter. Jane might as well play along. “what were you- uh, we doing?” “Y’know, going where we wanted to go, doing what we had to do…” He noticed the blank look on her face, “um… bounty hunting, smuggling, mercenary work… y’know, all perfectly… uh, legitimate ways of earning a profit.” He grinned at her. Jane felt a shiver run up her back. “Did we- did I …ever… kill anyone?” His face fell. “You didn’t have much of a choice. None of us did.” Jane looked down. “Hey, he was gonna kill me! If you hadn’t shot that dart, I wouldn’t be here now, and neither would the rest of us. You saved all our lives- isn’t it better to take one life for three, not three for one?” After his reassurance Jane felt a little better, but the logic was flawed. She decided not to mention it. “Come on, we’ll go see Ris. You’ll like her… or at least you did before.” “This is all too weird” Jarshe muttered as they walked through the door and onto the deck. He hoped Lissel had not heard him. It’s not very big, is it? Jane was expecting to be on a huge starship, like in those Star Trek shows, but unless there was a whole other hidden section, there were only two rooms in it. “Hey, I heard what happened.” A clear voice with a light British accent came from behind one of the two chairs in the front of the…bridge?. “It must be terrible to be in a place you’ve been in for most of your life and not remember a thing about it.” It swiveled to face them. The woman lounging in it had short brown hair, laughing green eyes, and a genuine smile. She was alternating between pushing important-looking buttons, and playing with a piece of wire. She looked directly at them and grinned. “I’m Ris. I’m sure Jarshe’s told you quite a lot about me.” She didn’t seem upset, but raised her eyebrows at Jarshe, who, at the moment was busy trying to sink into the wall. “um, I haven’t said that much, only what she already, uh, knew before…” Jarshe realized he was digging himself deeper, and trailed off. “He said you were weird.” Jane said helpfully. Ris rolled her eyes. “It looks like things are getting back to normal already. Liss, can I talk to you for a second?” She shot Jarshe a glare and growled at him, then gave Jane another grin and a wink. “Well, come on then. He’s had his turn to confuse you, so now I guess it’s my job to undo the damage.” Ris got up and led her past the slumping form of Jarshe, who shrugged. He called after her “don’t say I didn’t warn you.” He started humming a tune, which Jane recognized as ‘taps’. Ris punched in a code on an access pad next to the door, and it opened to a different room than the one Jane had been in before with Jarshe. Ris noticed the puzzled look on Lissel’s face. “What?” Lissel pointed at the doorway and glanced back at Jarshe. “She can’t remember any tech. As far as she knows, the world is still at the ‘airplane’ stage. And I’ll bet she doesn’t know about extra-dimensional spaces, either.” He started to head for the chair Ris had abandoned, but paused. “Oh, one more thing. She thinks she’s a kid, and her name is Jane Carmandy.” He smirked at Ris “Good luck.” Ris led her through the door, shut it behind them, and sighed. “They really did a job on you.” She went over to a table, picked up a teapot and poured cups for both of them. Handing one to Jane, she led her to a chair, and sat on the bed next to it. “I don’t trust Jarshe not to screw this up, so I’ll start from the top. You’re Lissel, you’re a freelance merc, and you to work with us. We broke you out of lockup, but they’ve already done god-knows-what to your mind, and that’s why we’re having this conversation.” Jane started to protest that there was nothing wrong with her mind and that this was all some crazy dream, but Ris continued. “We’re on the Hand-basket, the most upgraded and totally illegal ship in existence." She paused. "You can keep a secret, right?" She raised her eyebrows and grinned. Especially since you're the one who's responsible for all the illegal stuff being here in the first place she thought, but did not say. " Anyhow, back to the point. I noticed you wondering about the door, it's Jarshe's fault, he designed it. It’s called an extra-dimensional gateway. It lets multiple places occupy the same area of space at once, so while this ship only has two sections, it has six rooms. "The helm, Jarshe’s room," She ticked off her fingers one by one. "My room," She raised a hand and indicated the room they were currently in. It had exotic looking cloth draped over the walls and the furniture, and Jane counted at least four tea services, plus several other things that might have been tea services, but she wasn't sure. "You like?" Jane smiled and nodded absently. "Oh, good. There's the cargo hold where we keep all the stuff we don't want anyone else to know about, the galley, and your room. I'll show you that later. I'm sorry if I'm acting funny, it's just… well, it's not every day you have to explain someone's life to them!" She drained the teacup and had just got up to get a refill, when Jarshe's frantic voice filled the air. "You'd both better get up here, We've got company!" Ris looked panicked for a second, then pulled her through the door, muttering. "I didn't expect them this early." They bolted through the door and came to a sudden stop in front of the screen. There were three big ships, closing fast. "It's the feds! They're after you, Liss. They want you back! The three ships hung ominously in front of the main window; they seemed to be waiting for something. Ris shooed Jarshe out of the pilot's chair and slid into it herself as, tea cup still in hand, she began to punch the buttons that would get the Hand- basket into extra-dimensional flux. "Liss, get on the big guns, we'll have to…" She trailed off as she remembered Lissel's problem. "Um, on second thought, maybe you should stay down here. I can get us away from them, Jarshe you make sure they can't follow us." He hit the doorway at a dead run. BEEP!! both of them jumped. "The comm!" Ris gasped. Composing herself, she hit a button and a little screen on the board popped up and a face could be seen in it. "Attention fugitives: you are under arrest. surrender peacefully, and you will not be harmed.” something on the front of the ships began to glow. “I repeat” the voice said, more harshly this time, “Surrender now and you will not be harmed.” Ris’ eyes went wide and she gave him her best ‘sweet and innocent’ grin. “Really? You mean if we turn our friend over to you right now, we won’t have to fight you? And I was so hoping to blow you out of the sky!” Her expression hardened “Up yours, ass hole! I don’t care what you think you’re going to do to us, you’re not getting her back!” Jane was staring out from behind her, watching the exchange with growing annoyance. What gave Ris the right to treat her as if she wasn’t there; to decide who she would go with? Besides, she was technically an escaped prisoner, they had every right to arrest her. Anyway, who was she to argue with the law? Something deep inside her tried to protest, but it was quickly forgotten in the flood of horror that came over her as she saw a glowing metal ball shoot out from somewhere on the Hand-basket and plant itself on one of the other ships. Jane didn’t know why, but she knew the people inside it were about to die. It hung there for a moment, just sitting there on the hull of the vessel. Ris shouted something else at the person on the screen, but it didn’t register. Brilliant blue tendrils of lightning emanating from the ball began to crawl across the ship. The lightning got brighter and covered the entire surface of the ship, turning it an effulgent blue. Then, without any warning, the entire ship erupted into a ball of flames and debris. Jane felt her spine turn to ice, and she sank into the chair beside Ris, her knees weak. “Y- you just k- k- killed…” Jane couldn’t think, her mind was whirling. She had never seen a real person die before. Sure, she’d heard about it on the news and stuff, but that didn’t seem real; it just wasn’t the sort of thing that ‘happened to you’. Now, several people were dead, stolen from existence, it was her fault, and she could have stopped it. “Jarshe, we got them. You set up for another round?” Ris shouted into a panel on the wall, and Jarshe’s exited voice crackled back. “Hurry and bring her around! I need a clean shot before they get over their shock and start hammering us back!” These words only strengthened Jane’s resolve. She no longer cared what Jarshe and Ris did to her; she was going to turn herself in. Small white pellets were streaming at the Hand-Basket from the two remaining police ships, like luminescent hail. She saw the button that Ris had used to talk to the police and reached for it. Ris was still yelling instructions at Jarshe so she didn’t see what Jane was doing until it was too late. She pressed the button and shouted over Ris and Jarshe. “Stop! Don’t shoot! I surrender!” Ris let out a yelp and dove for Lissel’s hand, still pressing the button. “Are you insane!?” The speaker on the console crackled to life again. “Ah, good. Jane, I see your companions have been so busy fighting between themselves, that they have forgotten all about you. They must be very cruel, not letting you make your own decisions. I’m glad you finally made the right one in the end. Now just make sure they hold position, we’ll send out a pod to come take you home.” Lissel nodded vigorously and Ris’ grip on her arm loosened. The monitor clicked off. “You really have no idea what they’re going to do, do you?” Ris snarled at her. A loud crackle came out of the speaker on the wall. “HEY!! Is anybody listening to me? Did we just surrender!? Ris, what’s going on down there?” “No, We did not… yes, Jane did. Hold on tight, I’m going to try to get us out of this.” She glared at Jane. “If you want to try any parting shots, now’s your chance.” Jarshe was only too happy to take her up on her offer, and the sky soon filled with white. Ris physically yanked her friend away from the console and began a frantic spinning dive that took them directly between the two enemy ships who could not fire for fear of hitting each other. Jane felt the world fall out from beneath her as the ship moved, too fast for the gravity generators (or whatever they were) to handle. She heard a crash and saw something brown trickling down the wall. Ris punched one more button with finality, and the world jumped. The police ships were gone, and the stars were in a different pattern outside. Ris heaved a sigh of relief and shakily knelt to collect the fragments of her teacup. ***^^^*** "You think you can just kidnap me!? Take me to your space ship!? You said yourself it's because of you doing this that they're after me… and you expect me to TRUST YOU!? "yes." "look," Ris began, somewhat impatiently "If you go back to them now, they'll kill you, they already started subliminal messaging to make you never want to break the law again. That left your mind open. Now, with our wonderful influence, you're starting to regain your own personality." Jarshe broke in. "And 'cause they can't give you the treatment-" "Torture" Ris substituted "More than once, they'll have to kill you. You see? You have no choice except to trust us." Ris picked up where she had left off. "Until your real personality comes back, we'll help you and make sure you don't kill yourself" Then, thinking over what had just happened, she added "Or us!" Jane was sitting in the chair, despondently. "but… if my… Lissel's personality comes back, won't that mean that I die? Jarshe answered her. "No, you'll just get more and more egotistical, and develop… aggressive… ah, tendencies." He grinned and suddenly held his hands up in an effort to block the friendly elbow that ordinarily would already have been there, but Lissel hadn't moved. She was sitting on the chair, looking blankly ahead. “What is it?” A tear rolled down one cheek. Ris put a comforting hand on her shoulder. “Hey.” She said gently “don’t worry, we’ve been through worse than this together and we made it through alright, this isn’t going to be any different. You’ll see.” “But it’s different for me. How would you feel if you found out your whole life was a…” she paused “…a figment of your own sub-conscious designed to be as miserable as it could possibly be?” Ris slowly took her hand off Lissel’s shoulder. “How would you feel if you found out on day that you weren’t really you, but an old, lying, murderous, slut!?” Her voice rose in pitch and intensity “How would you feel if some one told you the part of you that made you you would cease to exist, and someone else would take over? How would you feel then, huh? HUH? You can’t say it’s going to turn out okay, because you don’t know how I feel! I’m going to die!” She broke down and started sobbing. Jarshe had never seen Lissel cry, and it scared him. “you’ve got to stop that.” “Jeez, I feel like your mother!” Ris muttered under her breath. “Well, go ahead and mother me- you took my mother away! You took any chance I had at a normal, happy life! It’s your fault I’m in this universe, anyway!” Ris rolled her eyes. Suddenly, without any warning, her hand flicked out and slapped Lissel on the face. Jane was in shock. She had been bossed around, yelled at, and ridiculed before, but no one had ever, ever hit her. She just stared dumbly. “You want mothering? Well, here it is. I’m going to tell you what to do, and you’re going to do it. First: You’re going to Get Over It. I know you’re scared, and you’re right. I can’t possibly understand what it’s like to be in your position, but this is real, and you’re going to have to face it. Second: You’re going to Accept It, …and for god’s sake, stop thinking we’re trying to hurt you. If you want to be paranoid –and I’m not saying that’s a bad thing- be paranoid of everybody else. We’re probably the only ones you can trust. If we scare you so much, then as soon as you’re ready, you can go your own way; but I don’t think you’ll want to. Everyone knows your reputation, and a lot of people have grudges against you. If word gets out that the great Lissel is defenseless, they’re liable to try and take you down. Now. If you still want to me mothered, you can go relax. I doubt you’ve had any real sleep since you were um, rescued.” She stopped, and realizing she had just been treating her life long buddy like a three-year-old, looked sheepish. “I’ll stop now.” “I can’t believe I did said that to her.” Ris picked dejectedly at the shards of porcelain that had only hours ago been her favorite teacup. “I mean, this is all too wired. It’s like she’s Liss, but she’s not. Know what I mean?” She thought about what she’d said earlier and sighed. “Don’t get so down about it.” Jarshe said from across the table. He knew the path her thoughts were taking- down. It was showing on her face as clearly as if she had a neon sign hanging there, announcing ‘Ris is getting depressed again’ for all the world to see. “You knew it needed to be said, and you said it.” “Yeah, but I’m afraid she’ll never trust me again. She’s got no clue who she is or what she’s supposed to be doing, and here comes the terrible monster Ris to bite her head off. “Well, you do have to admit it. She nearly got us all killed back there.” They both sighed. Jarshe leaned back in his chair. “I just can’t get used to this. I mean, just two days ago, everything was normal.” He winced as he envisioned one of Ris’ prized samovars sacrificing itself in the line of duty (with a little help from Lissel) in order to deflect an incoming grenade and save their butts. Then the carnage that followed as Ris chased her victim around the station for three hours with a metal platter. “Well, as normal as our life ever gets, anyway. But two days!” Ris’s eyes suddenly widened and she sat up straight as she remembered something. “Oh, god. Oh my god.” Jarshe couldn’t think of anything else to say except “What?” “In two days. We’ve got a job in two days… and Liss probably won’t even touch a butter knife, let alone a snipe-stick.” Jarshe just groaned. “We’re supposed to play bodyguards for some big wig auction house president, right?” “Yeah, I think he’s an antiques dealer. At least we won’t have to worry about a dangerous job this time. I mean, who’s going to be after some old man who looks at someone else’s worn out junk for a living?” “Hm. I guess we won’t have to worry about Liss being found out yet. If word gets out that Light Fingered Liss is uh, indisposed, we’ll have every bounty hunter and dealer who we ever crossed on our tails right along with the feds and the residents of certain stations…” he trailed off as he noticed the look she was giving him. “That was not my fault.” “O… kay. Right. I think I’m gonna go wake up sleeping beauty and show her the joys of life as a merc.” He got up and swaggered out the door. Ris sighed and picked up two pieces of the tea cup and a tube of bond-it. ***^^^*** When Jarshe opened the intercom channel to Lissel’s room with the intent of asking if he could come in, all he got in response was muffled screaming. Fearing the worst… or perhaps something more likely but just as bad, he charged in. The room was dark and oppressive. He could see a quivering pile of sheets on the floor next to the bed, and it was softly whimpering. “Mom! No, don’t…nngh! Not a dream…G-get away from me! no. NO!” Jane sat up off the floor, shivering as the cool air hit her sweat-soaked body. She didn’t recognize where she was at first, but then she remembered. There was someone in the room. She found herself instinctively grabbing for something on the nightstand. She almost had the little gun pointed at where her target was standing, when she realized what she was about to do. She dropped it, held her head in her hands, and began to sob. Jarshe rushed over to his friend and took her hand in his. He saw the terrified humiliated expression on her face and chuckled. “Hey, watch where you’re pointing that thing! I came in here to see if you were ready for a crash course in weapons, but I guess I needn’t have bothered. Only Lissel the great could have assassinated someone with a glue tube. ” She took a closer look at the “gun” in her still shaking hands and sniffed. “Oh, don’t disappoint me and smile, I made a bet with Ris that you’d never smile again, and if you do, I’m out 20 chits.” He chuckled again as she tried desperately to keep a straight face and continue crying. It was a loosing battle. He picked up the glue tube and made shooting motions with it at the wall. Jane burst out laughing. It wad the first time she had really laughed in… she couldn’t remember the last time she had let down her defenses and just laughed, but she did it now. Not wanting to let her think too much about whatever it was that had caused her to have the nightmare, Jarshe started talking. “Really, I came in here to tell you we have a job coming up in a couple of days and you’ll probably want to learn how to use more than a glue tube if you don’t want to be found out.” ‘And killed’ his eyes said. She got the message. “Want some help?” She nodded. “How many rooms do you have in this thing?” Lissel was staring at yet another section of the Hand-basket she didn’t know had been there. “Ris said there were only six.” “I guess she forgot a few.” Jane did a double take; she had been expecting another one of these long winded explanations these people seemed so fond of giving but it did not come. Instead, Jarshe simply said “this is our armory and practice range.” He gestured to what Jane had thought to be a hallway. “a practice range… on a ship?” “Yep” he said simply. She looked around surreptitiously. "what are you doing?" "Where's the camera?" "Camera?" "Yeah. I can't be on candid camera without a camera." She lifted a tarp and started opening cabinets. "What's candid- never mind." He grabbed a long black stick covered in buttons. "What's that, a flute?" He pressed one of them and three sticks and a scope popped out. He handed it to Lissel who eyed it dubiously. "What is it?" "It" he said grinning "is a snipe stick." "I hope you don't expect me to actually use this on someone…" "Um, we'll see." She frowned. "Well even if you won't use it, you should know how anyway. Remember, you have to make everyone think there's nothing wrong with you." "There isn't anything wrong with me." "Right. Sorry, I just meant-" "I know." Jane smiled. "what does it do- besides just kill people I mean." He pointed at the scope. "You look through here and put your target between the crosshairs. See?" She looked. "aim at that dot on the wall over there." She did. He did something behind her and suddenly the dot grew into a silhouette of a person. Jane gasped and reflexively hit a button. The silhouette exploded. Jarshe burst our laughing as Jane stood shaking with adrenaline and shock. "I guess your body still has the instincts, even if your mind doesn't." She just stared at the smoldering stick in her hand. "I- I killed it." The days seemed to fly by as Jane was ‘instructed in the ways of the mercenary’. Snipesticks, blasters, knives, hand to hand combat, and camouflage were drilled into her as she was shown how not to blow her cover and get herself killed. It all seemed strangely familiar, and Jane had to admit she had a knack for it, but she didn’t think she could bring herself to actually use her newfound knowledge. Jane just couldn’t imagine being the cause of someone’s injury or even death. So, while, like a good student she dutifully practiced everything Jarshe and Ris taught her, every time she learned something new, she resolved never to actually use it anywhere but in practice. After a particularly long session of target practice, Ris’s scream of “Hey, workaholics! You hungry or what? Jarshe, give her a break already!” via the intercom was a welcome sound. Gratefully, Jane peeled off the targeting goggles she had been using, and set down the snipestick. “Hey! Forgetting something?” Jarshe pointed at the gun lying on the shelf and raised an eyebrow. Jane sighed, and, flicking the safety on, disassembled the thing into it’s normal three pieces. She rubbed her eyes and walked over to the door, and, opening it, saw Ris, laden with boxes of food. When she saw what it was, Jane grinned. “Hey, Chinese takeout!” Ris heaved the bags onto the table and nodded, busy unpacking. Jane frowned. “I thought this was supposed to be another universe. How can they have Chinese food if there’s no China?” Ris responded. “Of course there’s a China. Home of one of the busiest ports in existence” “Does this mean there’s an earth too? can I go home now?” “What’s an earth?” “Earth- you know, the planet? Where people come from?” “Um.” Said Jarshe. “China’s a planet, but I’ve never heard of an earth. Is that where you think you’re from?” Jane looked down and mumbled “Yeah.” But she didn’t want to completely abandon the possibility of never getting home again. “So, they had Chinese food in your dream?” Jarshe asked around a mouthful of noodles. “Mm hmm.” “I don’t really doubt it. It must have been really strong in your sub-conscious. You used to love it.” “What do you mean, ‘used to’? Pouring herself some tea, Ris changed the subject. “So. You feel ready for this afternoon?” “What’s this afternoon?” Lissel asked innocently, then, rolling her eyes she added “Are you going to shove my head into a bowl of water to help me hold my breath longer?” Jarshe grinned. “That actually might not be such a bad idea.” He leaned back and closed his eyes, and then shouted “Hey!” as a pair of chopsticks and a handful of noodles suddenly made a themselves a new home on his face. He continued, more seriously. “No, really. We have to go meet with the president of the Encadia auction house today. “Ooh, great. We get to spend our afternoon making sure no one tries to kidnap the all-important snooty money grubbing dusty old junk dealer.” Ris commented in a monotone. Then she squealed “How fun!” her voice shrill, and practically oozing sugar syrup. Lissel winced. “Gah! Don’t do that!” She held her ears for a while, then slowly peeled her fingers away when she was sure it was safe. “Do I have to go?” Jarshe just rolled his eyes. “Do I have to go?” he repeated, mocking her. “You sound like a whiny school girl.” He jerked slightly as he was reminded by Ris’ surreptitious kick to his shin under the table. “Er, that is…” he trailed off as he noticed tears glistening in the corners of Lissel’s eyes, and saw her lip starting to quiver. Ris quickly moved on with the conversation, hoping to distract her. “Anyway. We’re supposed to meet our contact in the warehouse. We’ll be given more details then. So far as I know, they want us to protect the guy in charge of the antiques section… ***^^^*** Two moons and one sun hung in the sky, indicating late afternoon, as three figures walked in the doorway of a decrepit looking warehouse. One was dressed in rumpled clothing and leather, all shades of brown. He was grumbling something about ‘docking fees’ and ‘complete thieves’, and was periodically arguing with a dust covered woman. She was wearing a jacket that would have looked like it was a refugee of a dumpster, except that it was made of all kinds of luxurious fabrics and gilding which were sewn together in a haphazard fashion. It was covered in all kinds of mismatched buttons. They were followed by a hard faced woman with an innocent, wonder-filled expression that seemed out of place on her. She kept picking at her black jumpsuit, and adjusting her jacket. “Wasn’t someone supposed to meet us here?” Lissel asked, looking around. The huge building was filled with shelves, some covered in tarps and some filled with what she could only consider to be junk. “Maybe they’re lost somewhere in here.” Jarshe muttered, eyeing the claustrophobic looking rows of shelves and boxes. “Hello?” he called. Ris began to wander over to one of the nearby shelves as something seemed to catch her eye. Cautiously, she lifted one corner of the tarp covering it, and gasped. She stood, unmoving for a while, until Jarshe came over to see what was the matter. When he saw what she was staring at, he just groaned. “What is it with you and tea!?” Jane had to stifle a giggle when she walked over and saw the expression of bliss on Ris’ face. She was turning an ancient looking teapot over and over in her hands, luxuriating in its presence. “You think I could afford one of these?” Ris asked to whoever happened to be listening at the moment. She was surprised when an unfamiliar voice answered her. “I doubt it, those are over 300 years old, and part of a collection. To sell them apart would be a crime against art.” “Hey.” Jarshe gave a quick wave and a grin to the newcomer, a startlingly tall woman, with mid-length black hair and a cold expression. You sure know a lot about this old junk. Maybe you can test your skills against the tea queen over there. Hey Ris, you got competition! You here for the auction tonight?” Jarshe asked. “You could say that, yes. I’ll certainly be there. I’m Em Perrinson, the president of Encaida auctions. I take it you three are Jarshe Ris and Lissel? My, um… hired help?” she gave a brief smile, her eyes warming just a bit before they were frozen by the rest of her face, becoming ice once more. Most of the evening went without a hitch, with Ris sighing whenever a particularly intricate tea set went by, Jarshe sighing whenever Em Perrinson went by, and Jane just taking it all in. Lissel was standing behind the curtain that draped behind Em’s podium, fiddling with her blaster and periodically whispering into a little microphone and ear jack. ‘I feel like a secret service agent!’ she couldn’t help in thinking as she heard Ris say something in her ear. “Okay, it looks like we have the last one up here now. It’s a painting, and- her voice trailed off and then screamed “Liss! Now!” From her perch behind the curtain, Jane could see the entire audience and the backs of Em and whatever happened to be up there at the time, but not the wings. She jumped out from her hiding place and into a protective position in front of Em just as the screaming began. At first. She didn’t know where to look, but a flash of motion in the corner of her eye got her attention. He was standing against the wall on the side, dressed in rags. Jane could have kicked herself. Why hadn't she noticed him before? He was holding a beat up but still effective looking blaster, and a round metal ball that looked suspiciously like a bomb. Jane could see the madness gleaming in his eyes. He held the gun up, pointing it at Em. Then he spoke. It was a harsh, raspy voice, slurred by drink yet still hard and threatening "Why hello, Em, how nice to see you again." He grinned, his yellow, stained teeth showing clearly. A familiar scent wafted up from him, and Jane recognized it as the smell of garbage. The man walked forward and Lissel raised her gun. He gave a mocking cry of fear. "Oh, please don't shoot me. I'm so afraid of little girls with little guns." Lissel held the blaster steady, aimed at his chest, but he seemed to be able to tell she would not be able to bring herself to do anything with it. "Don't tell me you're not happy to see me, Em. Din'cha miss your beloved husband?" Em's eyes widened. "Rendel?? But- what happened?" "What happened?" he slurred, "you happened! If it wasn't for you, I'd still be rich!" "Rendel, what are you talking about!?" Em cried, her voice quivering from fear. He fiddled with the trigger of the blaster. "Ya' damn bitch, you know what--" He stopped ranting as two blaster bolts whizzed by, bare centimeters from his head. Ris was standing there, a grim expression on her face. "So tha's the was it goes, is it? Poor widdle Emmey has to depend on hired thugs to protect her from her loving husband?" He laughed, a hoarse bark that sounded like he was choking. Suddenly, he whipped his gun around and fired a single shot. Ris cried out and collapsed holding her shoulder, an expression of agony etched on her features. His hand flicked out and he tossed the metal ball he'd been holding. A hissing sound could be heard and mist began to escape. All around, people went down, coughing and holding their throats, eyes shut tightly against the gas. Em screamed and began to run for the back door of the room, but he caught her. Lissel ran up to try and tackle him and bring him down, but she couldn't breathe. She was almost there when she collapsed, wheezing, arm stretched out toward the drunk. Rendel laughed and headed back, dragging a struggling Em and an unconscious Lissel behind the curtain. (ending) “NOOOO!!!” Jane screamed as she leapt between Em and the descending knife. Grabbing the hand holding it, she reacted instantly, and, filled with rage for what Closs had tried to do, reversed it’s direction, stabbing it into his gut. He gasped and began to choke on the blood welling from his mouth. He fell to the ground and tried to say something, but Jane cut him off by twisting the knife, pushing it further into his abdomen. “You bastard! You should have just killed me and been done with it, but you made a mistake, didn’t you?” She twisted the knife again, and Closs gurgled and his eyes rolled around desperately. “DIDN’T YOU!? Well, I’m not going to give you a chance to make up for it. Jane’s eyes filled with red haze until she could no longer see. “DIE, you ass hole! DIE like the roach you are!” With every ‘die’ she stabbed again, in a different place. “ DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! DI-“ She felt a hand on her shoulder, and noticed she was unable to bring the knife down any farther. The rage cleared from her eyes and she saw Jarshe was struggling to hold her arm away from what was left of Closs’ pureed and quivering corpse. Ris was grabbing her shoulders and desperately trying to pull her away. Em was standing behind them, blood spreading from the wound in her shoulder, but otherwise unharmed. Jane looked at the mess at her feet and sagged, allowing herself to be dragged away to sit against a wall. “Jane?” Jarshe looked into her eyes, his face completely devoid of expression. She began to sob and something within her cracked. “I… hhmmmmmmm killed… I just oohhhhhh… I nnnnoooooooo…” She rocked back and forth, holding her knees in front of her. The world went dark. ***^^^*** The darkness was warm, comforting, and deep. Lissel wished that she could stay in it forever, but the spear of light that tugged at her eyelids was not to be denied. She cautiously opened one eye, and then the other two… The end.