Taylor put some money in his jeans pocket, and headed out of the bedroom. He said nothing to anyone as he left about what time he�d be home. He stopped briefly to tell his mother he was leaving.

�I�m going out, Mom.� He said simply. �I�ll see you later.� He kissed her cheek, and before she even had a chance to say anything he was leaving.

�I love you!� She called after him.

�Love you, too.� He called back, and the front door closed.

�Hey, Jordan; I�m glad to see you could make it.� He said, pulling him in.

�I�m not staying.� Taylor said. �I just came to get my stuff.�

�I just sent you some last week. What are you stockin� up?�

�Yeah, sure.� He replied. �Do you have it?�

�Who�s that?� Another guy asked, coming up behind Jazz.

�A friend.�

�What�s he want?�

�Same thing they all want: nose candy.� Jazz answered. The other guy almost started laughing.

�Yeah right; Angel Face is here for nose candy? You�re kidding me, right?�

�No, I�m not.� Jazz replied. �Beat it.� The other man scowled and stalked off. There was a woman walking towards them; Taylor could tell exactly what kind of woman she was by the way she was dressed. She put her arms around Jazz�s neck.

�You gonna introduce me to your friend?� She asked.

�Sure thing, babe. Candy, this is Jordan.� He smiled at Taylor. �Jordan � Candy.� She let go of Jazz and walked to Taylor � she was cocked. She put her arms around Taylor�s neck; he pulled her off of him.

�I didn�t come here for a whore � �

�Hey!� She interrupted.

� � I came here to get my stuff.�

�Relax.� Jazz told him. �I got it.�

�You wanna try some good sh*t, Angel Face?� The other man asked, coming over to them again. He held out a small square mirror with a small pile of white powder on it � but it had a tint to it.

�What is it?� Taylor asked.

�It�s a speedball.� He answered. �Good sh*t.� Taylor looked at Jazz.

�How much?�

�Nah, man.� The other guy said. �This one�s on me.� Taylor looked at him, then at Jazz, then at the small mirror. He looked at the other man again; he nodded.

�Okay.� Taylor said. He followed him to the couch and sat down. The guy took a razor blade and cut the pile of powder relatively in half, scraping some of it to the other side of the mirror. It was a little bit smaller than the other half of the pile.

�Little at a time.� He said, and then looked at Taylor. �All yours, Angel Face.�

�My name is Jordan. Got it?� The guy nodded. Taylor took the small square mirror from him, set it down on the nearest flat surface � which was the coffee table in front of him � and bent down. They heard him sniff it. He sat up and sat back � it only took about five minutes for the high to start.

Candy was sitting at the other end of the couch now; she was high out of her mind. Taylor looked sidelong at her. She crawled across the couch when she saw him looking at her; she climbed on him and straddled his lap.

�Change your mind yet?� She asked him. �Want some Candy?� She giggled a little.

�How much Candy can I get?� He asked in return. This was the highest he�d been.

�How much do you want?�

�How much are you willing to give?�

�Baby, I�ll give you more Candy than you can handle.� They locked eyes for a moment. She knew she�d gotten him going now. She climbed off of him and took his hands; she pulled him off of the couch and led him to the nearest bedroom, and closed the door.

Taylor was barely aware of anything he was doing with Candy; all he was really aware of was the pleasure, which was already heightened by the cocaine and heroin in the �speedball�. Taylor, not on drugs, would never have sex with a hooker, or even worse, unprotected sex with a hooker. He was so high he didn�t know the difference. He was content to receive the sexual favours she gave him; right afterward they had sex anyway. He was so high, as was she, that neither of them would have known how to use protection if they�d had any or thought of it.

He woke up lying half on top of someone, and she was completely naked, as was he. He pushed himself off of her, and got out of the bed. He had to look around for his clothes � his boxers were right next to the bed. He pulled them on and continued looking for the rest of his clothing; he found his tee shirt under the bed, his jeans by the door, and his jacket by the bedside table. He dressed himself and walked out into the living room. There were three other guys passed out � one on the couch, one on the floor, and one on the chair. Jazz wasn�t one of them. There was a small baggie on the end table; Taylor picked it up and put a wad of money in its place. There were a few small bottles with syringes next to them, still in the packages. He thought about it for a moment� He picked up a bottle and syringe, and put money in its place. He hadn�t intended on spending the night. Then again, he hadn�t planned on f*cking a hooker either, he thought to himself. He just had to get home, and hope they didn�t ask too many questions. He didn�t have to answer them anyway if they did.

When he got home, all he got was questions from his mother. He was getting extremely irritable.

�Are you OK? You were gone all night. Did something happen?� She asked him.

�Mom, I�m fine. Just because I didn�t come home last night doesn�t mean something happened.� He snapped.

�Were you getting high?� She asked.

�Oh my god, I�m not talking about this.� He said, turning around and heading for the stairs.

�Taylor,� she called after him, following behind him.

�I�m not sixteen anymore, Mom. In case you�ve forgotten, I�m nineteen.�

�I know. Just tell me, were you getting high?� She almost had a pleading look in her eyes as he stared at her.

�No.� He answered, turning around and walking up the stairs. He slammed his bedroom door.

Isaac and Zac looked up when the door slammed; Taylor looked pissed as hell.

�Everything OK?� Isaac asked.

�Jesus Christ! Why the f*ck does everybody keep asking me that?!�

�Take it easy,� Isaac said, �I was just wondering �cause you looked pissed.�

�Well I�m fine.�

�We�re working on some stuff for the new album, if you want to help.� Zac said cautiously.

�Whatever; I�ll help later.� He said, walking over to his dresser. He couldn�t put his things in the lockbox with his brothers around.

�Mom and Dad were worried about you � �

�I know!� Taylor snapped, cutting Zac off. Zac and Isaac both got up, and walked over towards their brother. He kept his back to them.

�Did you get high again?� Zac asked him.

�What d�you care?� He asked in return.

�We�re just concerned.� Isaac said.

�Don�t be.�

�Tay, you were high last night, and that�s why you didn�t come home, isn�t it?� Zac asked.

�Mind your own business, Zac,� he said through clenched teeth.

�Don�t take it out on us if you�re pissed off.� Ike said.

�Just leave me alone, okay?�

�Hey � � Zac reached out and held Taylor�s arm. He spun around and shoved Zac hard, knocking him backward into Isaac; he caught him, holding him up. Both of them stared at Taylor stunned. Neither one of them had expected that.

�Back off.� Taylor said. He glared at them before he turned and left the room, slamming the door behind him. His brothers stared at the closed door for a moment. Isaac helped Zac stand up, and he straightened himself out.

�I was only going to tell him he could talk to us if he needed to.� Zac said, hurt by his brother�s outburst.

�I know,� Isaac replied. �Just let him cool off.�

There was one afternoon that Taylor came home high, but it was wearing off quickly. He headed up to his room, with a lot of help from Isaac.

�Are you hung-over?� He asked him.

�No,� he mumbled. He was flushed; Isaac touched his cheek and forehead.

�You�re warm,� he said.

�God I feel sick�� Taylor said more to himself than his brother.

�Tell me now if you�re gonna throw-up; I�ll bring you to the bathroom.� It seemed to Isaac that Taylor was breathing rather slowly� �Tay?� Taylor nodded. Zac saw them pass by the bedroom. Twenty seconds later Taylor was on his knees, bent over the toilet bowl, throwing-up.

�God, I gotta stop this sh*t,� Taylor said to himself.

�Stop what?� Isaac asked him.

�Nothing� talking to myself,� he mumbled.

�Tay� if you�re in trouble�� Ike said quietly. �I�ll help you.�

�I don�t need help,� he replied.

�Are you using drugs? Are you doing something else besides pot?� He thought he heard his brother mumble �I don�t do pot�, but he couldn�t be sure.

�No.� Taylor said finally. As he pushed himself up and flushed the toilet, it seemed to Ike that it looked like Taylor had lost weight. He made it over to the sink to rinse his mouth out. He stumbled a little; Isaac grabbed hold of him. Isaac was far from stupid; pot didn�t do this to people. He was using more than marijuana. Taylor looked like he was going to pass out.

�Come on, let�s get you in bed.� Ike said. He got his brother to their room and into his bed. Zac watched. Taylor passed out in less than five minutes; but Isaac had a strange feeling� He didn�t like how slowly he was breathing; it worried him.

�What�s going on?� Zac asked him.

�Keep an eye on him.� Ike said, referring to their brother.

�Everything OK?� He asked. Ike looked at Taylor again, and then back at Zac. Zac had a feeling he already knew the answer.

�I don�t think so.� He said. �Keep checking on him; make sure he�s still breathing.�

�If he keeps ending up like this, I�m not covering for him anymore.� Zac said. �I�m not gonna have this on my conscience if something happens to him.�

�I know.� Ike replied. �He�ll be pissed off if we rat him out, but it�s worth pissing him off if he�s doing something that�s endangering his life and we can stop him.�

�Then you think he�s using more than pot, too?� Ike nodded.

�Keep it between us until we know for sure.� He told Zac.

�Need something, Avie?� He asked her.

�Can I talk to you, Ike?� She replied. She looked unhappy, maybe upset.

�Sure.� He said. She came into the bathroom; she put the lid down on the toilet, and sat down on it.

�I think something�s wrong with Taylor,� she said quietly.

�Why do you say that?� He wondered if Avery had figured out Taylor was using some kind of drugs.

�He was really mean to me the other day.� She looked like she was going to cry. Isaac went over to her and squatted down in front of her, placing his hands gently on her knees.

�Did he hurt you?� He asked her. He prayed to God that Taylor hadn�t hurt her. If he did, he�d kick his ass himself. She shook her head, swiping at her eyes.

�He�s been really different, like� mean. He gets really angry at everybody. Mom taught all of us about drugs and stuff, and� I think Taylor might be using drugs.�

�Did you tell anybody?�

�Just you.� He sighed in relief. �I don�t want to start trouble, but� his bedroom door was open a little the other day, and I saw him. He was sniffing something � I think he was sniffing it up his nose.�

�I need you to do something, Avie.� She nodded. �Don�t tell anybody else. Let me talk to Taylor first, and if he�s hurting himself then you can come with me to tell Mom and Dad.� He said. �Okay?�

�Okay,� she replied. She hugged him before she left the bathroom.

Isaac knew he had to broach this subject carefully with his brother; he was liable to get angry pretty quick lately. When he came in the bedroom Taylor was pushing closed the top drawer of his dresser. He looked briefly at Ike.

�Can I talk to you about something?� Ike asked.

�No,� Taylor replied seriously.

�I talked to Avie today; she said you were being really mean to her.�

�Sure; if she says so.�

�Everybody sees it, Taylor; everyone says you�re different. You�ve changed � a lot � in these passed couple of months. Even more so in the last few weeks.�

�Whatever you say, Ike.�

�What�s going on with you?� He asked. �What�s your problem?�

�I don�t have a problem, other than you right now.� Taylor answered.

�What are you taking?�

�Excuse me?�

�What drugs are you on, Taylor?�

�Get off my back.�

�Avery saw you, and she told me. I told her not to tell Mom and Dad.� Taylor was glaring at him. �She saw you sniff something up your nose. Are you using cocaine?� Taylor looked like he was ready to kill Isaac.

�It�s none of your damn business what I do.� Taylor replied.

�Answer the question, Taylor. Are you using cocaine?�

�No.� He said through clenched teeth. �What the hell business is it of yours?�

�You�re on something. We�ve all seen the change in you. If you�re not going to talk to me, maybe you�ll talk to Mom and Dad.� Without any warning, Taylor charged at Isaac; he grabbed him by his shirt and threw him against the wall.

�Don�t you dare say a word to Mom and Dad.� Taylor said angrily. Isaac could see he was high again � this was getting to be a constant thing and it was really worrying him.

�If you know what�s good for you, Taylor, you�re gonna take your hands off me, right now.� Ike said calmly. After glaring at him for a minute or two, he let him go. Without another word Taylor started out of the room.

�I�m only trying to help you.� Isaac said. Taylor flipped him off.

Isaac sat down on Taylor�s bed, feeling somewhat defeated. What now? By the way Taylor reacted he felt even more that he was doing drugs � maybe he really was using cocaine. It seemed even more so to him now. And if he�d been using cocaine� what else had he used, or was he using now?

�What�d you say to him?� Zac asked, either upset or angry.

�Avery told me she saw him sniffing something up his nose��

�What?�

�I think he�s using cocaine.� Ike said quietly.

�You�re serious.� Zac replied, seeing his older brother�s face. �We have to tell someone � addicts don�t help themselves.�

�Slow down. We need to sit down and get a mental checklist of all the things that support this. We can�t just go tell Mom and Dad he�s using cocaine without anything to back us up.�

�But Avery saw him,� Zac argued.

�She saw him sniff something up his nose, she didn�t see what. For all we know it could be nasal spray � but I doubt it.�

They decided after twenty-four hours that they�d thought up enough of a mental checklist to confront Taylor and bring it up to their parents. They had looked for him all over the house, but he wasn�t there. They almost thought he wasn�t home, but they had just seen him a few hours ago.

Isaac and Zac went down to the garage � it was the only other place Taylor could be. Sure enough, he was. Standing where Isaac and Zac were, you wouldn�t be able to tell Taylor was even alive. Isaac went over to Taylor, Zac behind him. He was staring blankly ahead, blinking slowly.

�Taylor?� Zac said. He looked at Zac, barely able to realize he was talking to him. Isaac looked around him � there was an empty baggie.

�Son of a bitch�� he said to himself, and realized that Taylor had something in his hand. He picked up his hand and took what was in it. It was a syringe.

�Ike� we�ve got a serious problem.� Zac said, seeing the syringe in his older brother�s hand. Taylor was so out of it he didn�t even know his own name � he couldn�t walk, or barely move. He was lucky not to have passed out by now. Isaac looked at him again.

�Jesus Christ� He�s higher than a f*cking kite.� He said.

�What do we do?� Zac asked him. �We can�t just leave him in here.�

�We don�t even know how much of this sh*t he took.�

�I�ve never seen him like this before,� Zac said, obviously scared of what he saw.

�Neither have I,� he replied. �Come on, we have to get him to a hospital, or a detox center � we have to get him somewhere.� They each bent and put an arm of Taylor�s around their necks � Ike could plainly see the needle mark in Taylor�s left arm; he saw about six needle marks. God only knew where else they were. He was completely wasted.

�Taylor,� Ike said. �Do you know how much you took?� He didn�t answer.

�My guess is too much.� Zac said. �He looks really wasted, Ike� He�s scaring me now.� He looked at Isaac, unable to look at Taylor any longer. His brother wasn�t there � it was just his body, with an empty look in his eyes. Where had things gone so wrong? If they didn�t get him somewhere fast, and find out what he did to himself this time, both Zac and Isaac were sure he was going to die.

�Mom! Dad!� Zac called. He looked sideways at Taylor, and called their parents again. �Mom!�

�Dad!� Isaac called. They both came running. They saw their sons dragging Taylor along, his arms slung around their necks.

�What the hell�?� Their father didn�t know what to make of what he saw.

�What�s the matter with him?� Their mother asked.

�He�s strung out,� Isaac answered. �He�s higher than a goddamn kite.�

�What?� Their mother replied. Isaac held out the empty baggie and empty syringe. �Oh my god��

�Look.� He said, holding out Taylor�s arm so they could see the needle marks in his forearm.

�Dear God�� Walker said, more to himself than them.

�I know he used coke � cocaine � that�s what was in the bag: white powder. God only knows what was in the needle.�

�Taylor?� His mother took his face in her hands and tilted his head up to she could look at him. His pupils were dilated, and his eyes were bloodshot. She could plainly see that he was wasted.

�Walker, stay with the kids. I�m going to go with them and take him to the hospital.� Diana said. �I promise I�ll call you from there. Okay?� He nodded once. Taylor made a noise, and tried to bring a hand to his face. They all looked at him.

�Oh God,� their mother said, seeing the blood running from his nose. She left the room to get a washcloth, or dishtowel, or something. She came back quickly with a dishtowel and held it to his face. �Come on, let�s go. We need to get him to the hospital � whatever he put in himself needs to come out.�

�Talk to him or something.� Zac said, not sure what to do.

�Put your seatbelt on, Zac.� Isaac said to him. Zac looked at him, more than a little annoyed. Taylor could die from a drug overdose and he�s worried about a goddamn seatbelt? Zac thought to himself. He fastened his seatbelt, and turned again in his seat.

�Hold on, Tay.� Isaac said, more to himself than to Taylor.

�Taylor, honey, talk to me.� She said, but he didn�t; she still held the cloth to his nose, his head in her lap. He looked a mix between drunk and high � she prayed he wasn�t both; God only knew what the effects of mixing drugs like that and alcohol were. He didn�t look or act it, but he was actually feeling quite good, feeling euphoric in a way, although, he did have a headache, and the damn bloody nose. He smiled a little, but he was beginning to feel very drowsy � he was starting to come down from his high. None of them thought things were going to get any worse, but they were wrong. Suddenly his whole body went rigid, his hands clenched into fists, and he started to convulse.

�What�s happening?� Isaac asked, glancing in the rearview mirror.

�Oh God�� Zac said aloud, not meaning to.

�I think he�s having a seizure,� their mother replied, terrified and worried about her son. �Hurry, Isaac.� She still held Taylor�s head in her lap. Zac undid his seatbelt and climbed into the backseat to help her hold him still. They were less than ten minutes from the hospital. After a couple of minutes Taylor stopped convulsing and went lax � he was unconscious now. His heart was still beating, maybe too fast, and he was still breathing. In less than four minutes they reached the hospital, and Taylor went rigid and started convulsing a second time. Isaac ran into the hospital.

�Somebody help me; my brother is having seizures in the back of my car!� Immediately, at least four of the hospital�s personnel stopped what they were doing and ran. One of them grabbed a gurney; another grabbed other equipment. Isaac led them to his car.

�Does your brother have epilepsy?� One of them asked.

�No,� he replied. �He took some drugs,� he told them. One of them was half in the backseat by now.

�Do you have any idea what he took, or how much?�

�Uh � cocaine, and something else in a syringe.�

�Probably heroin,� one of them said to the doctor. They got him out of the car and onto the gurney � he was still convulsing. He finally stopped, and lay limp. His eyes were half open, and half rolled up in the back of his head, and he had semi-dried blood beneath his nose. They brought him into a room and started examining him. The male doctor lifted his eyelids and shined a light in them.

�Pupils are dilated,� he said. �Track marks on the forearm.� He noted after lifting Taylor�s arms to look at them.

�Heart rate�s up.� One of the nurses said. �B.P.�s up, too.�

�Okay; let�s run a tox-screen.� The doctor said. Diana, Isaac, and Zac stood watching from the doorway. Suddenly he started convulsing again.

�Whoa� he�s seizing again,� the doctor said, holding him down. �Not good people; I want him on detox now.� After a few minutes he stopped seizing, and they could do what they needed to, to him. And the other doctor talked to the three of them.

�Are you his mother?� She asked Diana; it was a female doctor that had been in the emergency room working on Taylor as well. Diana nodded. �Were you aware of the fact he was on drugs?� She shook her head.

�His father caught him high once � he said he tried pot, and he promised he�d never do it again.�

�That�s what he told us, too.� Isaac said. He was feeling too guilty not to come forward. �We�ve been covering for him for the past couple months � he told us he was only smoking pot,� he reasoned. �I�m sorry, Mom.�

�We didn�t know.� Zac interjected, feeling guilty as well.

�First, you all need to realize that it�s not your fault he was using drugs. It�s not going to help him get any better if you lay all the blame on yourselves; he was the one who chose to use them.�

�How is he?� Diana asked. She couldn�t help being anxious. Isaac put a comforting arm around her shoulders.

�He�s unconscious right now,� she answered. �We�re not going to know much until we get the tox-screen back. As soon as we get him into a room you can see him. Is he over eighteen?� Diana nodded. �You may want to talk him into staying for rehab. We�ve got a good program here � we�ll take him as an in-patient because he�s already signed in.�

�I�m sorry we didn�t tell you sooner,� Zac said. �He said it was only pot��

�Whatever you do, don�t blame yourself. Be there for him now, that�s what counts.� She said. �I�ll be back as soon as I get the results of his tox-screen. Okay?� They all nodded, first their mother, then Isaac and Zac.

�Hang in there.� She said to them.

As soon as Taylor was put into a room his three family members joined him. It was at least an hour before the doctor came back. She had a folder in her hand. She was very quiet when she first came in, and just stood looking at the three people worried for the young man that lay in the bed.

�Mrs. Hanson?� The doctor said gently. Diana stood up immediately. �I have the tox-screen results.�

�And?�

�Well, there were very high levels of cocaine in his blood, and a relatively high level of heroin.� Diana closed her eyes and covered her mouth. How could she have let this happen?

�I�m assuming he�s been using for a while.� The doctor said. �If we can keep him for rehab, withdrawal is going to be hell for him,� she informed. �Has he woken at all?�

�No,� Ike said quietly. He could see the look on her face; she was worried. �I take it that�s not a good thing?�

�Depending on how long and how much he�s been using � he could slip into a coma.� Diana sank back into her chair. �If he�s not awake in a few hours� see if you can wake him.� Diana looked up, and finally noticed the doctor�s name tag: Murphy.

�Thank you, Dr. Murphy.� She said quietly.

�Mom�?� He said hoarsely. She immediately took his hand and squeezed gently.

�Right here, honey,� she said softly.