This week's episode of "The OC" really hit a home run. Seth Cohen was his usual charming self, Sandy Cohen ran a comb through his hair, and we got a peek at Kirsten's cleavage. But I think the most earth-shattering development is the fact that Chino is apparently now Jesus. Let me make the case for him being the Second Coming: he saves lives through crisis negotiation, he continually has that long-suffering look on his mug, and he converts assholes into loving disciples. I counted three times that Luke came over just to say "hi!" Um, Luke friggin' pounded this guy in the first episode--and now he's bringing Chino brownies and shit? Nothing short of divine intervention could cause that. So there you go. Chino is our spiritual savior. *
This week also had Anna dumping Seth because he wasn't paying enough attention to her. Yeah. I think we all know that if this were the REAL OC, Anna would just hang in there, bitching to her friends about what a prick Seth was being, until one of two things happened: she meets some trendy OC whiteboy (see the clown shoe page for details) and takes off with him OR she gets pregnant with Seth's kid and then promptly dumps him because she doesn't want any of her kids having the last name "Cohen." What an anti-Semitic bitch! Thankfully this is not reality television and Anna grows a back bone--something that real OC high school girls won't even be aware they lack.
By far, the scene with Oliver threatening suicide was the best in the show. Does anyone else think that was the most spectacular acting we've seen so far from the broad that plays Marissa? Those were real tears! I swear they must've told her that was a real gun. Unlike some of you out there, I was not concerned about Marissa getting shot because her death would've had the impact of Frank's balls hitting the pavement, which is to say, no impact at all. Also, there's no way Marissa was going to get plugged because Luke already took a bullet from some other crazy kid at the beginning of the season. Does no one remember the tequila party?!
Finally, I just want to say that the requisite anti-suicide PSA after the show was recockulous. As if after watching Oliver look like a total puss by not going through with it, some other asshole is going to pull the fucking trigger. I'll tell you what--if they'd handed me another crap-ass episode, I would've put a bullet in my head as well. Fortunately for all of you out there who love me, the writers came through with a kick ass show and next week's should be even better. So be sure to tune in for my next recap--if the previews are correct, I might have some porn for you to read. Like you weren't on the internet to do that anyway! Birds of a feather, I always say.
* Does anyone know if God can take a joke? Please email me if you've got the rub on Jesus' sense of humor or any sort of prayers I can do to save my soul. Thanks.
