| Caravans: |
| Tedious, boring, small, depressing, brown. These are just some of the words that describe caravans. Now, it isn't the actual van itself that I am complaining about, it is the use of them, and the people that see them fit as holiday destinations. Why, after paying a vast sum each year to live in and furnish a home with every comfort you could wish for, would you decide to go away and live for the nicest days of the summer in a small tin hut, with about as much comfort as a wet day in Coventry? Caravans are also unbelievably slow, and clog up our already congested road ways. They make me late sometimes.Most of you will know, I have little time for anything, let alone old people driving slowly in a room on wheels. My anger excludes stationary mobile homes, which are really quite spacious, luxurious, and comfortable. |
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| Unnacceptable |
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| Ok, I'll let you off on this one. |
| Markets: |
| Markets...we don't need these. Long ago, when people had no money, and lived in dirty muddy huts, markets were needed. But, in the days of housing, shops and shopping malls, there is no purpose for loud, rude men to shout at you as you walk past their table filled with second rate, often stolen goods. Incidentally, these men are always unshaven, wearing a flat cap, and a Teknix bomber jacket, along with having just three teeth. The Market sells crap plastic toys to poor families who can't afford a good toy from somewhere such as the Entertainer. They also sell horrible meat, dirty, fake clothes and shitty watches which break. The market is the gathering place of the hairy toothed, dirty, smelly, stupid paupers of the society, and without it, they would perish. So lets make it happen, and banish them to their piss-soaked, rancid "houses". |
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| Markets- Urgh! |
| Clowns: |
| Sometimes, I give sympathy to clowns. They are men, but men who don't deserve our respect. Coal miners deserve respect, as do plumbers, butchers, builders, office workers and so on. But clowns, anyone could be a clown, they have no skills. In fact, it is an insult to be called a clown, so they must be doing something terribly wrong. They also work with stupid loud kids, and enjoy this. Clowns are also scary. Watch out for them. |
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| Clowns...watch out! |
| Holiday Reps: (18-30) |
| What annoys me most about these clowns(see above) is that some people actually like their presence whilst on holiday. Certainly, if you have an unfortunate accident whilst stuck in Crete or somewhere, then their help is more than welcome, but this should be the extent of a Reps work. However, some reps will force you into going on a trip such as "BBQ and bonk on a boat" or "Boring sports on the beach" (such as plastic cricket). These reps will try to act "hard" and "cool", when really they are the object of ridicule amongst holiday makers. They are stupid, bad, and annoying. If I go on holiday, I like to drink beer and have a good time, but I don't need a fat idiot cockney to show me how. |
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| Reps ~ Inane. |