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Chapter thirty-four

Lindsey walked into the training room and couldnďż˝t block out the night that
Douglass had been unconscious because of the unbinding spell. He waited as
Angel turned on the lights and was shocked to find himself slammed onto the
floor.

"So Lindsey, tell me your plans." Angel loomed over him in full game face.
"See, I have this real trust issue with you right now and I want to know
whatďż˝s going on in that head of yours."

"I....canďż˝t... breathe." Lindsey clawed at Angelďż˝s hand that was at his
throat, Angel lessened his grip but not by much. "I want to make it up to
Douglass."

"So, itďż˝s guilt you feel. I can understand your guilt, I mean just thinking
about those ugly scars that girl will have on her throat and wrists for the
rest of her life would make me feel guilty too." Lindsey was going to ask
what scars until he remembered the slight pinkish marks, he had almost
forgotten they were even there. "Or her best friend's murder, yep thatďż˝s
something to feel pretty torn up about." Angel looked thoughtful for a
moment. "So thatďż˝s all this is. A way to shake the guilt thatďż˝s hounding
you? We donďż˝t need your help then." Angel got up and went to the small room
to his left to get weapons out.

"Like I said before, Iďż˝m not asking to help." Lindsey felt anger toward the
vampire rising from the pit of his stomach, there was no way he was going to
allow Angel to stop him for making this up to Douglass. It was his
responsibility to protect her... Lindseyďż˝s eyes bulged, no it wasnďż˝t she
wasnďż˝t his responsibility but he wanted it to be. He loved Douglass, what a
fool he had been.

"I love her." Lindsey whispered.

Angel nodded. "I know, now letďż˝s try this one more time. Whatďż˝s your plans
Lindsey? You canďż˝t have her and be Wolfram and Hart's evil monkey boy at the
same time."

"Sheďż˝ll never have me."

"Thatďż˝s not the point. You canďż˝t continue working for them if you ever want
a chance with her, to have a chance at a better life for yourself. I only see
it as a win win situation." Angel looked at the young man and hated to admit
but they were alike in a lot of instances, the last time they had helped
Lindsey was with the blind children but then the lawyer just wasnďż˝t ready to
give up the good life he could pursue with the income Wolfram and Hart
supplied. Angel would never admit it but he felt guilty that he hadnďż˝t been
able to save Lindsey, to pull him from Wolfram and Hart's clutches. Sure the
guy wreaked havoc in his and his friends lives for months but Angel saw it as
a sign of a pampered brat, angry that he couldnďż˝t have his way and if there
was a chance to save Lindseyďż˝s soul heďż˝d be damned if he gave up that
opportunity.

"I canďż˝t just walk away from Wolfram and Hart. Theyďż˝ll kill me."

"Theyďż˝d kill you given the chance working for them Lindsey."

"Theyďż˝ll disbar me." Lindsey choked, all his life he had always wanted to be
a lawyer. When he was younger he had loftier goals, to help out the less
fortunate but after finding out what he could earn working for a large firm
greed had led him by the hand.

"I can only see that as in making the world a better place to live." Angel
handed Lindsey a couple of stakes and an axe.

"Hey, I was good at my job..."Lindsey stopped at the icy glare Angel had
aimed at him. "Iďż˝ve never been good at anything before." Lindsey added weakly.

"Its your decision Lindsey and I suggest that you make it quickly." Angel
left the man standing alone in the weapons room with his thoughts.
***********************

Douglass looked up from her computer screen at the others who were working,
her glance strayed to Spike who was oddly engrossed in a book on ritual
eating habits of the South American Sportelans. What was Spike doing reading
that book and more then that why was Spike reading? He never read before or
even offered to help when research was needed, slowly she stood from her
chair and walked behind him.

Spike was hiding a book inside the one she thought he had been reading, he
was so engrossed in the words on the page he was clueless that she was behind
him, reading over his shoulder. Douglass swallowed down the rising laugh when
she read the first few words, quickly her hand reached over his shoulder and
grabbed the book dashing away.

Spike jumped when he saw a flash of a hand reach over his shoulder and snatch
his book, with an angry snarl he jumped from his chair looking for the guilty
culprit. "Brat, give me back that book or Iďż˝ll throw you over my knee and
spank the imp out of you." Douglass ran in the direction of the stairs only
to run into a weapon laden Angel, almost making him drop everything he
carried. Spike had almost caught up with her only to have her duck behind his
Grand sire.

"Give me back the bloody book." Spike tried to reach around Angel annoyed at
the blonde's giggles at his defeat.

"One kiss between us will set the skies on fire." Douglass read from the book
aloud using the most dramatic voice she had. Spike growled again and dogged
around Angel only to have the imp run the opposite direction.

Lindsey walked into the lobby to find Spike chasing a laughing Douglass
across the room. She leapt onto a desk just when Spike closed the gap, the
blonde vampire tripped and almost fel and by the time he regained his footing
she was already two desks away using the office furniture like stepping
stones.

Gunn went to look at the book the blonde had pilfered from Spike and
snickered. "This is madness & I'll surrender willingly to it." Gunn read the
words to Douglass who couldnďż˝t contain her laughter. "Isn't it a shame to
lock away all the passion you have inside? All the passion we can share
between us?" She read the next line, the two looked like horrid actors in
some soon to be canceled soap opera. Spike made a grab for the book only to
have the cheerleader get it first, reading a few pages she raised a brow at
him and giggled. "Aw, Spike I had no idea. You read smut books." Spike knew
he looked like the bloody idiot in a game of keep away and he might as well
give up.

Cordelia cleared her throat and read. "Jennifer watched Dennis cross the room
to her." Slowly she walked in Gunnďż˝s direction playing up the words on the
page as everyone watched in amusement. "she knew it was wrong to be alone
with him but lord, how she wanted this man!" Now in front of Gunn she swung
her hair a little dramatically. "He pulled her to him quickly covering her
mouth with his," Cordelia stopped and waited for Gunn to take his cue, the
young dark man smiled and played along grabbing at Cordelia and giving her a
huge sloppy kiss. "she felt her bones go to liquid & she almost sagged
against him."

"Yeah, more like gagged." Spike muttered.

Cordelia gave him a cutting glare and continued. "He tore his lips from hers
to whisper..." She pointed to the words for Gunn to say. "Jenn, if you don't
want this, tell me now" Everyone burst into laughter at his faltered lines.

"I want you so bad, Den, please...now" Cordelia rubbed her hand on Gunnďż˝s
bald head bringing on more laughter. "She heard a low groan come from him."
Gunn let out the fakest most ridiculous moan. "as he trailed kisses along her
collarbone," Cordelia stopped and gave Gunn a warning glance that said try
it and die so Gunn blew kisses at her. "suddenly she was picked up & placed
on the bookcase. She tore his shirt open with impatient hands & wrapped her
legs around him, moments later the only sounds coming from the library were
moans & books being knocked off of shelves... Pfft, like that ever happens. I
mean how uncomfortable is *that*?"

"Itďż˝s not bad." Douglass and Lindsey answered absently, a look of horror
masked their faces when they realized they had said it out loud and in front
of one another.

"Iďż˝m not even going there." Gunn shuddered. Spike took the book from Cordelia
and stalked off to the vault in the back of the lobby. "I mean who buys that
stuff?"

Wesley cleared his throat. "I do. Thatďż˝s my book." Everyone tried to hold
back their laughter but couldnďż˝t.

Lindsey wiped the tears from his eyes as a conversation he had with Angel
months ago came back to him.
"Hey, I don't want to be here anymore than you want to see me. But I don't
have a choice." "You always have a choice. I mean, you sold your soul for a
fifth-floor office and a company car." He had a choice, and this time it was
a no brainer.