Part 5 by Runewolf "No no no no no." Lorne's Seabreeze threatened to spill out of his glass as he waved it emphatically. "Maybe we should try the thong. I'm all for the thong." "Can't I pose as a bouncer? I make a good bouncer. Don't they brood?" Cordelia and Lorne met shocked glances. "You know, I think thats one of the first times I've ever heard Angel say he broods." Cordelia's look turns assessing. "This may be working." "Darling, if it were working, you wouldn't THINK it was working. You'd KNOW." Lorne gestured to Angel. "I mean, look at him. Tall, built, intense. Women rip the clothes off men like him. Angel, haven't women ever done that?" "Well..." Angel's mind was assaulted with images of poor, defenseless women that had torn his clothing in their mutual... er... No, that wasn't how it happened. He had ravaged them. Mercilessly. Without remorse. "No." Angelus snickered in his mind. *Oh yeah, what about that foxy dancer I picked up in Reno?* "I killed her." *No, *I* killed her. But she was all up for the sex part. Remember that red hair?* "I'm a demon, guys. This is pointless." "So demons can't be sexy?" Lorne's voice was somewhat sharper than usual. Cordelia stalked over to Angel and poked him in the chest. "Listen you goof. Demon has nothing to do with it. Doyle was a demon. He had SPIKES. But that didn't mean he wasn't sexy. His fashion sense was far more of a detractor.... but I digress. We're not here cause you signed up for a Learning Annex course. We're here cause a life... a sweet, innocent life... is in the balance buster." She stepped back and regarded him. "Weren't you like a womanizer pre-vamp? Can't you like channel that?" *Don't you just want to snap her irritating little neck sometimes?* "NO!" "Angel?!" "Music, Lorne?" "You got it Angelcakes." *If you're too stuck up, I can do this.* Angel's lips narrowed. Anything Angelus can do, I can do. Except regarding the poor innocent defenseless victims... On the other hand, women read all those books about evil vamps, don't they. "Cordelia?" "What is it Angel, no you can't be the bartender... They already have one," "Women find the whole dark, broody, dangerous thing sexy, right?" Lorne grinned. "Um, most, I guess..." Cordelia's voice was hesitant. Angel grinned. All he had to do was pretend to be Angelus. *OH YES. SCREAMING WOMEN. I SO MISS THAT.* "Shut up" Angel stalked toward Cordelia, unbuttoning his shirt slowly as he went. *Throw in a leer. Properly done, leering is quite underrated.* Angel smirked. "I said LEER" He leaned over Cordelia and ran his eyes up her until he met her eyes. Then he glanced over at Lorne. "Lesson's over. I can muddle through this." "You don't dance..." Cordelia's voice was almost inaudible. "No, but I stalk extremely well. I figure I stalk, I smirk, I look at women like I want to eat them up. Worked for Angelus." Angel straitened and grabbed his coat. "Besides, we're running out of time." "He's not even dancing. This is SO not working..." Cordelia's rambles were distracted, as she couldn't seem to stop sizing up Angel. "I mean, how does he expect that to work?" "Its his way babe." Lorne grinned and toasted Cordelia as she ran after Angel. Once she was out of range he sighed. "Damn, I wish I could do that... it must be a vampire thing." |
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