In The End
Lyrics to "In The End" are owned entirely by Linkin Park
He stared at the spot she had just recently vacated. She was lovely, perfect.
It starts with one...
Not like he had a chance in hell with her, of course. She was the object of desire for every male he knew. He knew better.
One thing, I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
No matter what he did, he was sure he would fail. She wouldn't ever like him...and if she did, there was no way in hell that she would like him as much as he loved her. It just wasn't possible. He wasn't deserving of such love.
Keep that in mind
I designed this rhyme to explain in due time
All I know
"I think she likes you."
The girl said, smilingly. There was a hint of sadness in her eyes but she seemed encouraging. "She said she did..."
He snorted. "Yeah, right."
"You could try..."
He shook his head. The girl was only trying to help him feel better.
Time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
"Yeah, you should ask her out. If you don't do it now someone else will." The blond boy shrugged. "Someone like me."
He frowned, and nodded. "Of course."
It's so unreal
Didn't look out below
Watch the time go right out the window
He inhaled slowly. Of course he could do this. She was standing right there.
And exhaled. No. There was no way...why even bother? Silent rejection was so much better than in person.
"Go do it." The other girl said, pushing him. He shook his head, no.
"It won't happen."
The object of his every desire looked in his direction with a confused look, frowned, and left the crowded room. He hung his head and turned in the opposite direction, completely defeated.
Trying to hold on, but didn't even know
I wasted it all just to watch you go
His room was quiet, dark, and lonely. Just the way he wanted it.
Words filled his head, making it seem less melancholy and just plain out depressing. Words about love and hate, beauty and ugliness, joy and dejection. They made him happy, so happy he wanted to write them out.
But if she found the words, there would be no end to it. No, he wouldn't write. It could be found. He would just keep it to himself, where it belonged.
I kept everything inside and even though I tried
It all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time
He pushed his face into his pillow. He didn't cry. Never.
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end,
It doesn't even matter
He stopped the tears, but his heart still ached. There was no way he was going to get over this. No matter what she said, this girl was the one for him. And he didn't have a chance with her.
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end,
It doesn't even matter
"I asked her out today."
He stared at the blond boy with a kind of disbelief. "What?"
"I asked her out today." He paused. "She said yes."
He turned away from him. You were my friend, damnit... "That's...just wonderful." He said, stutteringly.
One thing, I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
"He asked her out."
The disbelief on his friend's face mirrored that of his own, not fifteen minutes ago. "What?"
"He asked her out. Today. This afternoon."
"...And what did she say?"
"...Yes..."
Keep that in mind
I designed this rhyme to remind myself how I
Tried so hard
"Oh my God..." Her eyes showed the beginnings of tears, but she hid them well enough. "I'm so sorry..." She frowned and muttered small curses, but it didn't help him any. He turned towards the wall.
"I knew I wasn't good enough for her."
In spite of the way you were mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
She frowned. "Of course you are....You can do so much better than her! You're such a nice guy, I'm sure you can! She's a bitch! You can do so much better...." She trailed off, softly.
"With who?" He vocalized the unspoken question. She bit her lip and sighed.
"I don't know."
"That's what I thought."
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I'm suprised it got so far
He schooled his features into a more presentable face, and turned his back on his friend. From behind him, he thought he could hear a soft sigh of regret, and then he heard her footsteps as she followed him into the other room.
Where They were.
Things aren't the way they were before
You wouldn't even recognize me anymore
He played his part well, laughing and joking around and trying to smile when inside he felt like he was slowly rotting away. She acted as if she didn't even care.
His friends looked each other in the eyes. He could see the tightening of the mouth from here.
A lot of good sympathy would do him. She knew that, so why did she even bother?
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me
In the end...
The girl laughed gaily, not responding to the black looks her friends, his friends, cast at her. She ignored them as surely as she had ignored him all this time.
He stood up and left the room. She didn't even notice.
His sanctuary was invaded, however, by his friend, once again. She frowned at him, obviously upset. Over what, he couldn't guess, because he was the one with the broken heart, not her.
"That's what friends are for. To share your pain." She said, once he asked her. She smiled, sadly, and turned to leave.
I kept everything inside and even though I tried
It all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory of a time
As soon as she left he felt bad. He was making other people sad because he was sad.
He felt so guilty.
But he couldn't help it. There was no control in this for him. She had broken his heart. His heart had been broken so many times that there was hardly a heart left in there for him.
He sighed raggedly, and once again put on his facade so that perhaps his friends wouldn't be so upset.
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end,
It doesn't even matter
His whole world had fallen apart in a few sentences. How many dreams, fantasies, he had created that had been woven around Her...and all dashed by a phrase.
He felt numb, which was better than the pain in his chest from a few moments ago. And infinitly better for his friends.
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end,
It doesn't even matter
The girl in his dreams had never existed. She had betrayed his trust by ignoring him, and his friends. She was normal, infinitly normal, and completely fallible.
Reality hurts...
I put my trust
In you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this, there's only one thing you should know...
His friends were there for him, which was new...strange. It had never happened to him before. And he was grateful, more grateful than they could ever know. But it just didn't help very much.
I put my trust
In you
Pushed as far as I can go
For all this, there's only one thing you should know...
And he gave up.
He'd never been what could be considered happy, nor hopeful. But he just...stopped caring.
She was concerned, but life no longer held meaning for him.
"Please talk to me..." His friend pleaded. He quirked his mouth.
"I'm fine."
I tried so hard
And got so far
But in the end,
It doesn't even matter
"You're so damn good at hiding your emotions." She said, sadly. She left his room, quietly.
There was no way he could tell her about all of his sadness. He was making her depressed enough as it was...his friends shouldn't hurt nearly as much as he did.
It was just wrong.
I had to fall
To lose it all
But in the end,
It doesn't even matter...
What does life matter anyway?
~Owari~