This topic requires a special section, for it can bring together the elements of home and community in a most impactful way. Ceremony is the marriage of conscious and subconscious, taking a worldly event and clothing it with symbolic or "heavenly" meaning. Human beings have demonstrated the need and love for ceremony in all cultures and in all eras. From the Australian aborigine "walkabout" (which can take months of self-survival in a desert) to the common high school graduation, from christenings to weddings to funerals, we humans create ceremony to celebrate the turning points in our lives.
Ceremony requires certain elements: purpose, participants, symbols, action, and atmosphere. Each element is specific to the culture and the occasion, yet some conclusions can be drawn:
Purpose: The purpose of ceremony is to recognize or commemorate a transition in someone's life. Examples of significant transitions are: conception, birth, entrance into school, the receiving/acceptance of godparents or guides, entrance into adulthood, entrance into a profession, marriage, and death. Smaller transitions may also have fitting ceremonies, such as departure for and return from a journey, elevation to a higher position in one's profession, or losing a first tooth.
Participants: The participants have an important part to play, so they should be chosen with care. Since each transition has its own "flavor," it is not possible to outline what is fitting here. However, there would most likely be representation from each of these three areas: family (immediate only or extended), community (neighborhood, school, profession, friends), and spiritual leadership (clergy, elder, attunement guide). These areas cover the spectrum of an individual's life experience, and thus need to be represented so that there is a sense that the "whole" person has made the transition.
Symbols: Ceremonial symbols are the element which distinguishes this event from a casual party or get-together. A symbol can be any object, sound, or movement that all participants agree represents something about the transition being celebrated. Many symbols have traditional meanings, such as wedding bands or the graduation "Pomp and Circumstance" music. However, symbols can be created or improvised, for anything can be "charged" with symbolic meaning by the agreement of those concerned.
Action: Ceremonial action can often be ritualistic. The traditional wedding ceremony is a good example of this: it has specific words and a particular sequence of motions. One might think of this kind of action as a drama, and this would be an accurate analogy. Traditional, ritualistic ceremonies have been thought of as re-enactments of "cosmic" dramas by many cultures. This relates to the idea that we function with subconscious archetypes in the back of our minds, and these guide our actions, particularly at times of symbolic significance.
The notion of proving oneself is just as important in some ceremonies as the rituals and the honoring by the participants. This is true in rites of passage, but it is also true to some extent in the ceremonies of marriage, graduation, and birth. This proving is a powerful motivator, causing people to endure much physical and mental exertion in order to receive the recognition of the community and justify the "right" to move into the next stage.
Atmosphere: This is perhaps the most important aspect of ceremony. At some point in every ceremony, through symbolic words and motions, and particularly through the presence of the one who represents spirit, there is a sense of the sacred. Whether it is an elegant church wedding, the opening of the Olympic Games, or a grueling trial of strength, behind it all there is a recognition that this is a sacred and holy event. Human beings yearn for this experience, although many moderns are almost embarrassed by it for lack of familiarity with it. Still, this is the feeling that is most desired, and planners and participants do everything to bring it about. This is quite appropriate, for if design and purpose are ever going to be honored, it will be in ceremony; and if ceremony is going to truly honor anything, it must contain stillness and reverence so that the "tone" and beauty of life can come through.
After sacredness has fulfilled its purpose, joyous celebration can follow. This is a "cooling down" or release of the deeper energies into a more relaxed pattern. This is appropriate, although there is often a dissipation of finer essences through over-indulgence (intoxication, coarseness). This is unfortunate, for in the revelry the symbolic meaning and purpose get lost. When celebration is in keeping with the significance of the event, it becomes a welcome extension of the special time.
Innovation
Although our society has many occasions for ceremony, some transitions get by-passed. For instance, entrance to puberty has been marked in many cultures by "rites of passage," in which young people were inducted into the adult community. These rites included some or all of the elements of music, movement, chant, and ordeal. Western society today does not recognize puberty as the beginning of adulthood, and young people most often do not have a symbolic honoring of that natural transition. It is as if it had no significance, or society could not figure out a significance for it. Thus there is a subconscious message given to adolescents: "We don't know what you mean or what you are here for." Graduation is not a substitute, for it comes later and honors a different kind of transition. So the compulsion to prove oneself, to be recognized as a special part of the fabric of society, gets ignored, and at a symbolic level, the young person starves.
It could well be that some very beautiful and needed ceremonies have yet to be created. It may also be possible that traditional ceremonies may need replacing, not by new traditions but by creating ceremonial symbols and procedures that fit just the people involved in that moment. As more and more humans come into attunement with the Creative Process and have finer sensings for how to clothe design and purpose, there may be a resurgence in the creation of ceremony. Perhaps we are all responsible for being creators, in this field and many, many more.
Application
One of the finest ways to become aware of the usefulness of ceremony is to work with one of the simplest and most routine transitions of all: moving from wakefulness to sleep. This transition is not as mundane as it may seem, and it would do adults well to explore this for themselves. A quiet time to consciously relax, review, and let the day's activities subside in thankfulness, rather than "crashing" into bed, can result in better sleep and a more alert awakening. It may also help increase one's sensitivity to the rhythms of the Creative Process, as patterns of relatedness and connection come to mind in these moments of stillness. Without emotional involvement, cycles and their transition points can begin to clarify and resolve. This can be especially useful at times of intensity, when it seems that decisions must be made or there is a need for perspective. Establishing a routine with this kind of peaceful ceremony may be invaluable for health and character development.
Children give an indication of just how significant such an evening transition can be. Those who have a story, backrub, or quiet chat before bedtime often have a more relaxed attitude about going to sleep and a more sound sleep rhythm. It seems to help settle their hearts as they give control to someone who is strong and trustworthy while they drift out of wakefulness. Childhood fears and worries can dissolve, and rest can be deep and refreshing. For younger children, all this can be communicated through touch, word, and song. For older children, issues can be addressed more directly. Parents can listen to what is troubling or confusing and can actually "absolve" feelings of guilt and hurt. Parents can also ocassionally take this opportunity of the child's open-heartedness to "wipe the slate clean" of past misconduct, known and unknown. In this way they act as intercessors for hearts that still need protection and nurturance, while teaching the value and power of forgiveness.
There is a wealth of untapped power in the deeper recesses of human consciousness, which can only be revealed through the language of the heart, or what psychologists call the subconscious. There is no better way to speak that language than through the magic and symbols, the art and science, of ceremony. This may have greater implications than we can currently imagine. For no matter how much we may prize clear thinking and noble achievement, a resilient and understanding heart may be the most powerful instrument in our lives.