Yaoi Lovers Anonymous
Poignant confessions from the co-creator of POYG
Okay, the digi destined are on there way to a club, but will they believe what's in store for them? Yaoi with kensuke, taito, takari, jyoushiro, taishiro, and yamou pairings
A DBZ/Digimon crossover (sort of)
This is the introduction of a new club started specifically for yaoi/yuri writers and readers.
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Goku hugged is koi gently as they flew through the night sky. To his left his eldest son was cradled in the protective grasp of his lover. To his right his youngest was playing air tag with his boyfriend. He knew that somewhere behind them, struggling to keep up, flew his childhood friend and his sweetheart.
"Goku, are we almost there," came a voice from the right. Goku nodded and reached out to ruffle Trunks hair as the youngster shot past, Goten fast on his heels.
"Hey chibi, if you catch me you get to be seme tonight," The lavender haired teen teased. Goten smiled and sped up as he chased after his beau.
"Hey you two, that's way too much information," Gohan chuckled from his spot in Piccolo's arms. The Namek whispered something in his ear and Gohan turned several shades of pink.
"You know, ningens," Vegeta called back to Yamcha and Tien, "We would be there already if you two would stop kissing long enough to fly right."
"Goku, are you sure that this club is okay," Piccolo asked. The last time Goku had talked everyone into going to a club that promoted Yaoi and straight people to mix Vegeta had started a fight with a biggot in the bathroom. Then Goku, who had also been part of the reason the fight started, had accidentally knocked the guy out. The straight girls in the place had kept trying to pick up Gohan, Goten, and Trunks and a few had even tried for Piccolo. It was a less than pleasant experience to say the least.
"Trust me," Goku said just as they landed in front of a large club. Neon lights flashed across the front of the building and smoke poured from the open doorway. The music reverberated in the air and was very clear it was a club as even the people hanging out in the doorways were dancing.
What the Hell," Vegeta screamed as he noticed something, part of the people had Saiyan tails. Some were obviously of Namekian decent and some even looked as if they were Samekians or Saiyan/Namek hybrids. Others were human and others still were creatures that no one recognized.
"Hi," a short red head chirped. It became painfully obvious she was of Saiyan decent as she neared them and used her tail to give a handshake to Goku, "I'm Cait, one of the co hostesses here. Are you boys gonna come in or stay out there all night?"
She didn't wait for their responce but rather pulled Vegeta by the arm into the club and all the rest followed. More people of strange decents and every strange outfit under the sun were present in the room. Loud music played and a mosh pit like dance floor was packed. The stage behind the D.J. booth was also packed and a few brave souls were even dancing on the railing. Groups of people sat here and there at different tables around the room chatting about different things. Three girls with wings had commandeered a pool table and were trying to calm their noisy infants and play at the same time.
"Ignore Yami, Awai, and Itsu. Yami insists on bringing her kid with her even though Pichan hates noise. He has his father's Namekian hearing, after all," Cait said and then began to gossip about the various people in the room. She finally found them a table and was about to walk off when Yamcha stopped her.
"Haven't I seen you before?"
"Yep, I'm surprised you don't remeber my outfit," she laughed and pointed to the POYG symbol across the front, "Chris, Ivy and I were the entertainment at your party last week."
"That was you," Gohan felt the color rapidly leaving his face as she nodded.
"What does POYG stand for," Piccolo asked as he tried to save his koi from an embaressing situation.
"You'll find out as soon as the Yaoi Lovers Anonymous portion of the night starts," Cait laughed and skipped off to find her boyfriend.
"Well, we're going to get some drinks. You guy want anything," Tien asked as he spotted the bar. Every one nodded and Tien and Yamcha took off torwards the marked off area.
"Well, don't drink our stuff while we're on the dance floor," Goten giggled as he grabbed Trunks and led his lavender lover out under the spotlights. They quickly became the highlight of the dance floor as they combined their natural talents with sizzeling hot dance moves.
"Would you look at those two," a blue haired girl at a nearby table whispered.
"Yeah, it's almost a shame they're yaoi," her inky haired counter part sighed.
"Yeah, almost, but I like em better when they're this way."
The Z boys exchanged glances, not quite able to believe that two girls had agreed that it was better for cute guys to be yaoi than straight.
"........and why not," a voice on the floor drew their attention. A small purple cat looked at them with equally lavender eyes. She smirked, something a cat shouldn't have been able to do, and started glowing. Within seconds where a small cat had been sitting stood a tall purple haired girl, wearing a dark purple out fit that had the word POYG across the front.
"It's one of the other ones," Gohan wailed as he hid his face in his hands. The girls may have helped lead him to Piccolo but they'd also embaressed the hell out of him on the way and gotten it on tape to boot.
"Glad you remember me," she laughed as she waved her tail happily behind her, "I just dropped by to say hi and to warn you that you've crossed over from the plane of your reality into the world of authors. That's why there are so many Saiyans and Nameks running around. And don't worry, most are related to you to some degree so they won't hit on you. Well, I gotta find Tim before he sneaks into the girls bathroom again. Ja."
"Is it just me or is this night just getting weirder and weirder," Goku laughed as he stroked the hair of the ouji sitting on his lap.
"What would be weird is if Piccolo would agree to go out on the dance floor," Gohan half laughed as he tried to get over his earlier shock but was given another instead.
"What a good idea, koi," Piccolo said as he stood and motioned torward the floor. Luckily for them both it was a slow song playing or they surely would have never made it out there.
After several slow songs, and an interesting rendition of Livin La Vida Loca, a very happy Gohan and a slightly embaressed Piccolo sat back down.They noticed eight kids walking in, four older teenagers and four twenty somethings. As it had been for them, most people gave them knowing glances and then went back to their drinks and dancing.
A sound from the stage caught their attentions. The dance floor quickly cleared and everyone sat on the edge of their seats. Gohan yelped and started to shake as Cait, Ivy and Chi got on the stage in their infamous POYG outfits.
"Hello everyone and welcome to POYG's Yaoi Lovers Anonymous night! We hope you're all enjoying yourselves," Cait bubbled as Chi jumped up in her purple mock cheerleader/super hero outfit, white pompoms raised high. Ivy shook her head and brushed dust off the corner of her own blue and black dress.
"Well, our members are gonna talk about themselves and why we Looooooooooove yaoi and yes, even good yuri, so much," Chi jumped at the end out of shock as Cait cracked her whip, "as you may or may not be able to tell.....Cait's going first. so take it away Cait."
Chi hopped off of the stage and into the waiting arms of a green haired boy. They purred an pawwed at each other, basically ignoring Cait and causing quite a distraction. Cait shot dirty looks in Chi's direction but didn't let up on her rant. She finally finished and motioned for Chi to take the stage.
"Well, it's time for our other co hostess to tell us why she's such a great yaoi fan! Take it away Chi," Cait sneared. Little did Chi know what was going to happen once she turned her back.
"Hi, A little about myself to start you out...I guess. I'm a 17 year old girl with a wild streak to out do Caitlin's. I am the inventor of a great game called triple flips. I have a bisexual boyfriend who's a real doll. I have one brother and a boatload of cousins who like to turn my house into party central. Top this off with a laid back kaasan, an overbearing bassan, and a Noah's ark of pets and you have my typical household. I get into, and out of, trouble quicker than Clinton."
Laughter filled the room and Chi turned around just in time to catch Caitlin and Ivy ducking off the stage with a big cue card reading: LAUGH.
"Haha. Very cute. Aren't we cute little brats today. Anyways...where was I? Oh yeah. Recently I had the pleasure, or maybe the curse, of meeting with other authors. I joined forces with Mrs.JetBlack. We both love, or should I say openly worship, yaoi."
Caitlin walked to the back of the room and lighted incense at her yaoi shrine. Chi tried not to fall off the stage laughing as Caitlin bowed down in front of the wooden platform.
"Next thing you know she's going to be sacrificing virgins. Wait....where would she find one in our group? Anyways.....so one night, while drunk off our butts, the two of us came up with this beautiful thing called POYG. And yet in the morning it still made sense...how odd"
Cait started dancing around the room holding a yaoi banner high and cracking her whip. Ivy fell over laughing, dropping the scythe she carried and almost hitting Lance. Chi shot them a dirty look but continued with her speech.
"POYG stands for the Protectors Of Yaoi Goodness. It all started as a wild night of brainstorming for a fic. Not just any fic, but a joint fic, a shameless, self promoting, joint fic that featured us as the hired entertainment, the Z boys meeting the digi destined, vats o liquor, and special brownies. Basically that spells out to be one Hell of a shin dig. Being the yaoi crazy idiots we are we just figured we'd get them all warmed up, hot and sweaty ya know, and then let them go at each other. It would work and we'd be three happy little horny yaoi otaku."
Caitlin climbed into Vegeta's lap and and began recreating the infamous night. Vegeta smirked and allowed Goku to pick the two of them up and deposit them into his own lap.
"God you three are bad. And yes, I'm well aware that I still haven't explained how POYG came to be. Well...you see our loverly outfits? They had POYG written across them because we were the Protectors Of Yaoi Goodness."
Chi stopped long enough to strike a super sexy super hero pose, a la charlie's angel, at the same time as Cait and Ivy. Gohan turned several shades of red and passed out.
"As soon as we were sober it occured to us that yaoi writers and fans needed support and that POYG was a good idea. We need to band together to support each other, to lend each other ideas, and to detere flamers. Anyone who wants to join can leave a message in the review or go to http://clubs.yahoo.com/clubs/protectorsofyaoigoodness *hinthint* or our website. http://www.geocities.com/yaoigoodness/POYG *hinthint*"
Caitlin pulled out a laptop (ironic isn't it. Cait's on Vegeta's lap, Vegeta's on Goku's and Caitlin's playin on a laptop) and held up the site.
"Now that I've explained it and shamelessly promoted our club I can finally talk about my favorite couples. I'll explain how they managed to catch my eye. I'm going to start with DBZ first because I am first and foremost a DBZ girl. I am probably the only yaoi fan who likes Videl. I think she's good for Gohan but not as good as Piccolo, unless of course Gohan, Piccolo, and Videl are cohabiting in harmonious bliss."
Piccolo rolled his eyes and Gohan, who'd recovered from his last fainting spell, ended up on the floor again. Ivy took that oppertunity to give Gohan mouth to mouth and Piccolo watched on in interest. Cait just smiled and continued to flirt with Vegeta and Goku, much to Gryg's dismay.
"I have always been a Piccolo/Gohan fan. The first yaoi I read was a Pichan. But yet, even before I was a yaoi fan, I thought there must be something more than friendship between the demi Saiyan and the Namek. They were such polar opposites. Gohan sweet, innocent, willing to please, and striving for Piccolo's adorations. Piccolo was dark, born with the blood of innocents on his hands, non sociable, and he only managed to find love for one being, Gohan. They balance each other out perfectly. Piccolo can only truely be himself around Gohan. As for the age difference. Piccolo and Gohan are seperated by only 4 years, that's a hardly a large ammount."
Piccolo and Gohan started making out as if their lives depended on it, totally forgetting that they were in the middle of a club and they were the center of the conversation.
"My next couple has got to be Goten and Trunks. They're best friends and friendship naturally progresses to so much more. They look so sweet together. They always got in and out of trouble together, more in than out. They were just meant for each other and there are many great yaoi fics out there prove it"
Cait jumped out of Vegeta's lap and quickly landed in Trunks. Chi shook her head and tried to continue with her rant.
"My third couple is actually a yuri. I think ChiChi and Bulma make a positively darling couple. Both of them are firery, passionate people who managed to control their Saiyan husbands and sons. you've got to admire the mix of strength and brains that come from that couple."
Chi ducked as several beers came flying at her head. Three of them were from the Z table and she knew at least one was from Cait.
"Maybe I should skip my fourth couple. It is also a yuri. Pan and Bra make a cute couple for much the same reasons that ChiChi and Bulma are a great couple. They control their fathers with ease. They even manage to one up their mothers on many occasions"
The room roared with approval as Cait led the anti ChiChi chants.
"Yes! You people liked it *bows deeply*. Except for Gohan and Vegeta who are shooting me death glares but IT DOESN"T MATTER *jumps in cheerleader poses again*. That actually leads me into my next couple....Goku and Vegeta! They are just sooooo perfect for each other. As the last full blooded Saiyans they share a kinship deeper than any bond they could feel with human mates. Vegeta is dark and Goku is light, they balance each other out. Through Goku's persistence Vegeta finds his inner goodness. They belong together."
The crowd fell silent in awe. Vegeta turned to his koi and nuzzled against the crook of his neck. Goku took his cue and carried Vegeta in the direction of the bathrooms.
"Last but not least a couple that was inspired by Ivy. She requested them and I've grown to love them. At first Yamcha and Tien made no sense but now they are perfection. Yamcha and Tien are both brash bold people who carry themselves well and share a common passion."
The crowds response was a mix of cheers, awe, and boos.
"Now I'm going to work on the Digimon couples I like"
Caitlin jumped to her feet and danced around the room.
"Let's start with the easiest to explain. Ken and Daisuke. They, like most of my couples, are opposites. The light yearns for the darkness. Daisuke was the only one to reach for the fallen emporer. It was fate pure and simple."
Caitlin jumped through the air and landed on Ken's lap. Daisuki laughed and ruffled the hair of his two favorite people. Ivy rolled her eyes and continued to admire how long Gohan and Piccolo could hold their breaths.
"Hey, Cait, think we could get a dance later? Just the three of us," Ken winked at the short, unnaturally red haired girl in his lap.
"Okay...ignoring the horny digi destined in the corner and moving on. And Ivy, dear, Piccolo has gills behind his ears. They won't be coming up for air any time soon. Now I can get back to my rant. This is one of my few straight couples for digimon *ducks flying bottles, several twelve packs were from Cait*. Hikari and Takeru *ducks more bottles* I'M SORRY! I just can't see hooking up Daisuki with anyone other than Ken *audience awwws*"
Cait ran up to the stage and smacked Chi soundly upside the head. The audience howled as the two girls started one of their infamous fights. After fifteen minutes and Tim and Gryg threatening them with sleeping on the couch for a month Cait went back to Daisuki's lap and Chi went back to her speech.
"I'm going to say this right now....JUST BECAUSE I LIKE YAOI AND YURI DOESN'T MEAN I CAN'T LIKE STRAIGHT COUPLES! Now that that's out of the way on to the many relationships we love to put Jyou in. I'm a big fan of hooking Jyou up with Mimi *ducks flying bottles* *removes fur from pom poms showing that they're really guns* Next person to throw a bottle gets it! My fave yaoi couple for Jyou would have to be Koushiro...they look sooooo kawaii together. But lately Cait has shown me just what a horn dog good old reliable Jyou really is. He and Yamato make a cute couple the way Cait writes it."
Cait wrapped her whip around Jyou and Yamato, pulling them close. Chi rolled her eyes and stared at Ivy and Bocheememon hoping for some normality. Spotting none she continued with her rant.
"A good taito is worth it's weight in gold. As jogress partners Tai and Yamato can actually feel each others heart beats. They know each others thoughts and I think shared understanding is essential in a relationship. But, like with Jyou, Cait has opened my eyes to the beauty of the Koushiro and Tai relationship. A well written Koutai is a gem worth looking for. I can't really think of anyone else Tai would be good with. *smirks cause she knows sooo many Taiora shippers are gonna try and wring her neck*"
Ivy had moved from Piccolo and Gohan to sitting in Yamato's lap as Tai kissed them both in turn. Chi rolled her eyes for the umpteenth time that night and swore to the gods she was never going club hopping with the core again (A/N the core is the four main members of POYG). Cait, Ken, and Daisuke had left and Chi could hear a car stereo blaring in the parking lot.
"Well, that's it for me enjoy the party."
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SPECIAL NOTICE TO EVERYONE WHO WANTS TO KABOB ME FOR NOT GETTING CHAPTERS OUT SOONER!
I'f you're interested in being emailed when I update, because FF.Net got rid of author alert, let me know. Send the email adress you want me to use either to [email protected] or [email protected]
Well, if you'd like to join POYG you know who to contact.
Next time in this fic. Dancing, partying, yaoi goodness, and Paladone bashing.
stay tuned
