Last weekend was a relatively dull affair. Actually, that�s every other weekend. Last weekend was a right old laugh and general piss up. (I usually piss down by the way, unless I�m excited). I left faithful old stab on the JJ bus on Friday evening. It was packed, smelly and stuffed. Not the most comfortable trip home by a long shot. Once in Borris, I got the head groomed by Josie, and then I headed home for fodder. The rest of the night went by quick enough because nothing happened. The next day however was a different story.
I was awoken by the auld lad bright and early to go work. I didn�t really mind this because its been a while since I did anything too strenuous at home. I spent hours moving cattle and hay, before finally getting home for the day. I thought my mother how to use the cd-writer about now, then had grub followed closely by a shower, shit and a shave. By 6 o�clock, I was heading for Galway with JP.
I arrived in Portumna around 7ish where we met Pecker and Edel getting food. After a quick discussion, we headed for Edel�s place. Her maniac brother drove in front and I followed as close as I could. It�s a disadvantage not knowing the road though. Once in Edel�s and once I was seated on the couch, Edel�s 2 dogs, Giles and Dunphy as they are called now, decided to jump and try eat the face off me. I got some shock, but the danger died down as they got tired soon enough. After the usual wait for people to get ready, we headed for Maura�s house. Edel was directing and it only took about 20 minutes to get there. Mo was working, so mammy Mo made us sandwiches, tea and some sweet buns. That was good foundation for the night ahead. Once all that was ate, and everyone ready, we all piled into Mo�s car and got a spin to Ballinasloe.
The 1st pub we entered had no where for us to sit, so we left and Mo brought us into some alley across the road. This place had a few seats, so we grabbed a pint and sat in the corner. The place reminded me of what I envisage the inside of the North Star to be. We had a few pints there, and pissed them out as quick. Mo then brought us to An T�m. This place was cool and we settled in upstairs on bar stools. After a while a couch became available and we sat there. The booze was flowing well here and not surprising we all were in need of the bog. JP had his business done and was in the process of washing the hands when some local Ballinasloe red-neck walked in and ass-raped JP at the sink. Once the cruel act was over, the ass-raper gave JP some valuable advice � �Mind your arse here�. A brilliant point put very poetically. Once that excitement died down, myself, Pecker and JP decided to play with the coolest jukebox around. Within minutes the 3 of us were happily singing along, totally oblivious to the goings on around us.
The night was pushing on around now so we headed for Rouge � the nightclub in Hayden�s. Headed for the bar straight away here aswell and then headed upstairs to check the talent from up high. The birds were scarce and the quality was poor enough. Add to this the small crowd in the place, the night was turning and heading towards beer, and beer only. Not that I minded cos I wasn�t driving. We did a bit of boogieing on da floor before piling out onto the street and heading for a bus back to Mo�s place. Da trip cost �4 only and once in Mo�s gaff, I was dying for the bog. I asked Edel where the toilet was and I�ll quote what she said:
�It�s the 1st door on the right pet.�
So off I set down the hall. Once I found the door, I searched for the light switch. After failing to find this, I opened the door and looked for the switch. I was successful this time, but to my surprise, I was standing in Maura�s parents room. I was shocked, so I made my apologies and went back to Edel for proper directions. This time Mo told me and I had a very nice piss. Around now, Mo had tea made which was lovely, and I settled on to a couch. After some chit chat, and Edel burning the balls off Pecker with her cup of tea, we all headed for our beds, or in my case, a couch.
I woke up bright and early the next morning, and I went down to Pecker�s room for a chat about the night before. JP walked in with his one sock and was totally confused as to the whereabouts of his other sock. He allegedly (no points for allegedly) ripped Maura�s brothers room apart looking for it but to no avail. He eventually found it in the bog and to this day we don�t know how it got there. Maura�s ma made us a sweet breakfast, a fry, and myself and Pecker drank a full pot of tea. It was lovely. After a brief chat, and a quick kick around, we headed for Portumna again, this time to watch the Manchester derby on telly. Utd lost and I wasn�t happy. We headed back for dinner in Edel�s place after the game and it was fair sweet, and badly needed. We took the piss out of the dogs, and the 2 suspicious looking camouflaged cats. One went about picking up a tree and slapping the other with it, but it changed its mind at the last minute. Pecker was out rubbing cows for a spella nd then we headed for Borris.
All in all it was a good weekend, and I�ll definitely go back for another session. Its sweet to be able to go somewhere and not have to drive, plus the couch was fierce comfy.
Till next time I write, which will be after Rag-Week, bye bye.