When God made Pets
In Tom Snyder's waning days before his retirement in 1999, Tom recited this little ditty, which I enjoyed immmensly. When all goes well, I am sleeping at 1:00 a.m. This particular night I just happened to tape his show which used to come on at 1:00 a.m. Later, I spent much time listening and writing and listening again and writing again trying to get this down the way he had recited it. I am sure it is not as great without his beautiful low melodious voice, but this will just have to do.
As told by Tom Snyder
�Lord, when I was in the garden, You walked with me every day. Now I don�t see You anymore and it is hard for me to remember how much You love me.� The Lord said, �Not a problem, I will create a companion for you that will be a reflection of My love for you, Adam, regardless of how selfish and childish and unlovable you may be. This new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do in spite of yourself.�
And so, God created a brand new animal to be a companion for Adam and it was a good animal and God was pleased, and the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and he wagged his tail. And Adam said �But Lord, I have already named all of the animals of the kingdom, all of the good names are taken and I cannot think of a new name for this animal�. And the Lord said, �Not a problem. Because I have created this new animal to be a reflection of My love for you, his name will be a reflection of My own name, and you will call him Dog.�
Now, Dog lived with Adam and was a companion for Adam, and Adam loved him, and Adam was comforted and God was pleased and Dog wagged his tail. And while it came to pass that Adam�s guardian angel came to the Lord and said that Adam has become filled with pride and struts and preens like a peacock and he believes he is worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught him that he is loved, but no one has taught him humility.
And the Lord said, �Not a problem, I will create for him a companion who will see him as he is and will remind him of his limitations. So God created Cat to be a companion to Adam.
And Cat would not obey Adam. And when Adam gazed into Cat�s eyes, he was reminded that he was not the Supreme Being and Adam learned humility, and God was pleased, and Dog was happy and wagged his tail and Adam was greatly improved and Cat did not give a damn, one way or the other.
