(The scene opens up to a sold out stadium here in Calgary. As the pryo explodes and the music of Rage Against the Machine's "Guerrilla Radio" continues to blare, we are shown a split screen of the WeWA Chairman Komona talking on the phone. Her dressing room is covered with words written in red lipstick like "bitch", "slut", "tramp", "whore" and with tears streaming down her face, the music fades. Panning around the her dressing room, we can see someone has made a shambles of the place. Chairs are broken, tables cracked, and suddenly through all the chaos, we hear these sobbing words.)
Komona: I don't know who did this, but I can only assume. This isn't part of the show, and I refuse to play a sick game like this!
Voice: I think I know who did it, and trust me, the person is already paying in spades. I have this all worked out, and if you just get a bit of protect, everything will be fine.
Komona: Are you coming to the Stadium tonight?
Voice: What makes you think I'm not already here?
Komona: Please, I need your help.
Voice: I'm already helping you, you just don't know it.
(A puzzling look comes over Komona's face as the security guards enter like a house of fire. Komona wipes the tears from her face, and hanging up the phone, smiles. The dial tone is replaced by a click. As the double screen merges into one, the WeWA theme music picks up once again and we are entertained by this weeks signs. First up are a bunch of drunken college guys with the words, "C.. C... =.. Ratings" written on their bare chests. Second we read, "I have climbed Misty's Peaks". Third is a man screaming shaking, "Johnny Extreme is my hero". Fourth is a very masculine looking women holding up, "Stonewall, You are Scum". And finally a crazy looking bald guy holds up, "I roomed with Karl Davis in cell 101". The camera does a looping 360, and then soaring over head, it dives down like a hawk onto the announcers table. This week Eric is dressed in his black jeans with white T-shirt, and Ryan is decked out in some red extra large wind pants with matching wind breaker. Both men have dawned the headset, and with the production truck yelling action, the Host takes off with the show.)
Bytchoff: Hello everyone and welcome to Canadian International Wrestling brought to you by the WeWA! The headlines this week were Jeff Jarret laying down and allowing Hulk Hogan to pin him. Vincent Russo went nuts, and pretty much, Hogan is being made out to look like an ass!! Is it true that Hogan took a page out of Darrel Besolve book, when he demanded to control the ending of his career. Or is this a masterful piece of work done by the only man who calls Mr. batee on a regular basis Vincent Russo? Either way, Bash at the Beach was a night that will go down in wrestling history.
Ryan: The hell with the indy leagues Eric, lets talk about the hottest thing since sliced bread, the World E-Wrestling Alliance!
Bytchoff: I'm right there with you! Apparently not only is Snake Eyes world championship belt missing, but so is Kid Evil's BACW strap! On top of that, Karl Davis's double fisted choke has been banned. And if that wasn't enough, we still don't know who our World Tag Team Champions are! Mr. batee has been MIA for 3 weeks and with Komona running the show, the days of old seem to have crept back into in the ring. The hardcore intensity is picking up and with the influx of the best wrestlers in the business coming in, how can you say we aren't the best! Fans, this card tonight is jam packed ! But, before we get into the action, Ryan, lets run down the show!
Ryan: OK, first up is our steel cage lights out match between to wrestlers making their WeWA debuts. Can Lee Riel make a mark by knocking out a very talented Roy Douglas?
Bytchoff: Both of these men are tremendous athletes and if they continue to perform the way they have, I see a bright future for both. As for a winner, get used to hearing the name Lee Riel! What's next?
Ryan: WeWA World Tag Team Championship featuring the champions Vital Operations and their opponents, The Crazy Ones!!
Bytchoff: Vital Operations was a bit quite this week, and if you ask me, tonight The Crazy's add another title to their very impressive careers.
Ryan: On the tails of that we will see Eddie Outlaw taking Alastor Stonewall.
Bytchoff: Eddie Outlaw did an interview about the bookers giving Troy Flash a world title shot, and how guys like Sam Natas & Dark Demon don't belong on the upper portion of the card. Well, tonight Eddie gets a shot at showing the world why he can get away with saying things like this, and should he win, which I believe he will, Snake Eyes must be next on his list.
Ryan: Triple Threat Match with Johnny Extreme, Spaz Forte, and Luther Dayne all looking to capture a chance at taking on either the Hardcore Champion, or the TV champ.
Bytchoff: Speaking of TV champions, as you saw at the beginning of the show, Stevey Sinister is alive and well! But will he be if Forte gets the "w" here tonight and requests a rematch?
Ryan: Screw the re-match! Spaz needs to take on Mike Johnson and right the wrong that was done to him during the last PPV. Davis and Flash, mono a mono and this one means a whole hell of a lot for both men!
Bytchoff: Davis is on the verge of getting another shot at The History Maker, but should he lose to Troy Flash mid-month, his pay-per-view chances at the Main Event are slim to none.
Ryan: And slim just left the building!
Bytchoff: Finally, in our Main Event of the evening we will see three champions competing for respect as Snake Eyes, Mike Johnson, and Kid Evil get together for the first time! The WeWA is moving along like a well oiled machine, and with the ring announcer.... hang on fans, Dark Demon has just arrived in the arena late and we heard Sam Natas is going to the back to greet him!
(The scene fades from inside the arena and out to the back parking lot as Dark Demon screeches his all black Ford Bronco. Exiting the rather large vehicle due to the lifters being enhanced, Dark Demon tosses his duffel bag over his shoulder and is slammed hard between the door and the car by "Evil" Sam Natas.)
Ryan: Natas has attacked and Komona has decided that this will be the opening hardcore bout!
Bytchoff: Side Russian Sledge Sweep and Dark Demon hits the tar hard! This match has started and my god, Natas just lowered Sledge across the back of Dark Demon.
(The crowd cheers as Dark Demon grimaces in pain. Dropping to one knee, Sam flicks the wooden handled of Sledge into the testicles of Dark Demon and Demon cripples into a ball. Dropping Sledge, Natas lifts Dark Demon off the mat looking for a DDT when Dark Demon drives a fist to Sam's mid section. Again! Again! Elbow into the stomach area and Demon gains the advantage after an eye gauge. Demon sinks his teeth into the forehead of Sam, and spitting out the salt, Demon follows with powerful body slam.)
Bytchoff: Both men are exchanging punched and have now entered the garage.
Ryan: Demon just connected with a vertical suplex on a wooden pallet and this one looks like it's about to get ugly!
(Jamming Sam's head between his legs, Demon lifts up and sitting back, cracks the pallet with a jumping pile driver. Removing one of the boards, Demon digs into the open wound of Sam Natas, making Sam a bloody mess! Flipping over Sam, Demon hooks the leg, 1.. 2.. 3!)
Ryan: I think Natas kicked out!
Bytchoff: He may have!!!
(Holding up two fingers the referee yells "two" and the match continues with Natas pushing his thumbs into the eyes of Dark Demon. Demon pulls back in pain and finding his sledge hammer, Sam presses it against his opponents throat from behind pulling back hard with a Side Russian Sledge Sweep again! Natas backs off and crouching low, waits for Dark Demon to get to his feet. Demon straightens up and as he wobbles on both feet, Sam hits his finisher "Triple 6" [karate chop to the throat]. Dark Demon crumples to the floor and Natas hooks the leg. 1.. 2.. 3!)
Bytchoff: It's over and my god what a big win for Sam Natas!
Stuffher: Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the bout, Sam Natas!
(The scene fades with Sam planting Dark Demon through a table and leaving him for the medics. Dragging his sledge from the assault, the announcers once again pick up the commentary.)
Bytchoff: Fans Sam Natas has just shown us why he IS a serious force in this promotion and why every player better take matches against him seriously.
Ryan: I agree Eric, and although that first match was exciting, the steel cage has lowered and it's time for the lights out bout.
Bytchoff: Let go to the ring!
Stuffher: Ladies and gentlemen this next bout is a steel cage match up and will be held under lights out rules. This means, to win, you MUST render your opponent unconscious! Now then, accompanied to the ring by his valet Misty Peaks, he hails from right here in Ontario Canada, this man weighed in tonight at 252 pounds. Welcome to the WeWA.. "Absolute" Lee Riel!
("Walk" by Pantera blares as an orange light overcasts the arena. Smoke comes out of the ring posts, and as Misty Peaks walk to the ring, Lee Riel comes from the crowd scaling cage. Dropping into the ring, the crowd releases a HUGE home town pop, and the introductions continue.)
Stuffher: And his opponent. He was born and raised in the Garden State of New Jersey! This is 235 pounds of "The Real Deal" Roy Douglass!
(Short pyro goes off, as the phrase "Keep it Real" by The Lost Boys flashes on the Ovaltron. As the music continues to play, the curtain parts and with his hair over his eyes, Roy slowly walks to ringside. Entering the cage, Roy has a menacing look across his face.)
Ryan: Both of these guys look in fantastic condition!
Bytchoff: As I stated at the top of the show, this is going to be one of the best matches of the night. Roy Douglass and Lee Riel, remember the names because both these men are going to make it big one day! Referee Teddy "4 Life" Valentine has called for the bell and here we GO!
(As the crowd begins to really grate on Roy's nerves, Douglass turns around to utter a few American four letter curse words. At the precise time of the distraction, Lee Riel races across the ring, connecting with a reverse shoulder block from behind. The momentum takes Roy straight into the cage, and as Riel takes a hold of his opponents head, he rams it into the steel mesh.)
Ryan: Roy is busted open, and listen to the crowd cheer their fan favorite!
Bytchoff: Lee with a nasty DDT and this one looks over as the referee begins to count.
Referee: 1.. 2.. 3.. 4.. 5.. 6.. 7.. 8.. 9..
Ryan: He got him! TEN!
Bytchoff: No, Douglass turned to his knees and the match continues with Riel picking up his opponent with a hand full of hair.
(Irish whip into the rope by Lee and as Douglass comes off hard, Lee connects with a spinning head scissors! Pointing to the top rope, the crowd encourages Lee to attempt his swanton bomb!!! Riel measures up his opponent, and leaping off misses the maneuver landing flat on his neck.)
Ryan: Lee Riel is hurt and here comes Douglass!
Bytchoff: Snap leg drop by Douglass from the middle turn buckle and lifting his opponent off the mat, sends Lee into the turn buckle with a hard thud! Roy is showing why he's called the real deal and my god listen to the crowd boo!
(Taking hold of Lee's head, Roy begins to ram Riel's head into the turn buckle for a ten count. Lee wobbles from the pounding and taking advantage of the situation, Roy applies a side head lock leaping into the center of the ring connects with a bull dog!)
Ryan: That's his set up to his finisher!!!!
Roy Douglass: Count that piece of shit ref!
Bytchoff: The referee is counting and I think this one's over!
Referee: 1.. 2.. 3.. 4.. 5.. 6.. 7.. 8.. 9.. TEN!!!!!
(Suddenly the bell begins to ring and the crowd begins to boo. The referee starts to yell 9 only 9 only and the match continues as the crowd now cheers! Roy can't believe his eyes and sending his opponent into the ropes with an Irish whip, Douglass drives home a spin kick! Lee Riel is in real trouble and getting up to his feet, Douglass sends him back down with an old school arm drag. Lifting and then pushing Lee back into the corner, Roy connects with a pair of bolo upper cuts. The fans protest and Misty Peaks is practically in tears. Irish whip again into a tilt-o-whirl back breaker and Roy is looking for the referee to count once and for all!)
Ryan: Lee Riel has suffered a tremendous amount of punishment and I have to tell you Eric, I just don't know what's keeping him up.
Bytchoff: Roy is going to the top rope, and god lord he just missed with a missile drop kick! The crowd is coming alive and look at Lee Riel feeding off their enthusiasm.
(Inverted DDT by Riel stuns the already hurt Douglass, and this time it's Roy who's backed up into the corner. Lee climbs the turn buckle behind his opponent and leaping over the head of Roy, snaps hard with a block buster! Roy staggers to his feet but Lee hits a Kryptonite Crunch! Body slam by Lee Riel, no counter by Douglass and the crowd is shocked.)
Ryan: Lee is done, there's no way he can come back from another offensive assault.
Bytchoff: Neck breaker by Roy Douglass and this one looks over! Roy is signaling for is finisher Last Daze.
(Lee drops low and connecting with a hard punch to the stomach, surprises the crowd by countering with a body slam. Half a brain buster by the weakened Riel and he begins to climb the cage.)
Ryan: Listen to the fans go nuts for this home town hero! He's climbing to the top of the cage and good gawwd, that's 20 feet above the ring!
Bytchoff: Lee is signaling for his finisher, but my god, he can't be thinking about performing the spinning Frog Splash!!!!!
(Taking a deep breath, Lee launches off the cage connecting with one of the most spectacular finishes in CIW history.. "The Hi-Lite of The Night" [spinning 5 star frog splash]. Roy is crushed under the fantastic finish and as Lee Riel barely pulls himself up to the a standing ovation, the referee begins to count Roy Douglass.)
Referee: 1.. 2.. 3.. 4.. 5.. 6.. 7.. 8.. 9.. TEN!!!!!
Ryan: It's over and Lee Riel has over come a tremendous beating and in front of this sold out crowd, he pulls out the duke!
Stuffher: Ladies and gentlemen, your winner of the bout, as a result of Roy Douglass not being able to answer the count of ten, "Absolute" Lee Riel!
Bytchoff: Fans Lee Riel has just been helped to the back and I can't believe this but Roy Douglass is getting up! The crowd continues the ovation for Roy who is furious with the result, but fans like in every contest, their had to be a winner. Lee Riel has moved up on the ladder, and if you ask me, it's only a matter of time until these two meet up again. Well folks, it's time for our world tag team champions to defend so lets go to the ring!
Ryan: I don't think we have to!
Bytchoff: Fans, both teams have just busted through the curtain and are beating the living hell out of each other! Maniac Mike slugs with VO #1, and Missing Link dukes it out with VO#2! It's all breaking down right from the beginning and the referee just called for the bell and this one is starting!!
(Vital Operations gains the advantage with a quick cheap shots and tossing both Crazy Ones into the ring, follow with a vengeance. Double Irish whip into the ropes into a double clothes line and the champions look great as they follow up with double leg drops! Lifting the Crazy's up in tandem, Vital Operations drills a pair of vertical suplexes making a double cover. 1.. 1.. 22.. 22.. 3.....!!!!!!)
Ryan: No, Link kicks out and this one is continuing with Maniac Mike stabbing VO#1 with a concealed fork in the forehead. VO#1 reels back from the pain and with one punch to the back of the head, Mike takes hold of the action. Crazy Ones send VO#2 into the ropes and plowing forward send the champion to the canvas with a hard shoulder block and he rolls under the ropes. Body slam on VO#1 and there goes VO#1 over the top rope.
Bytchoff: The champs are looking to regroup but The Crazy Ones will have no part of it as they bring the chairs to the outside. VO#1 connects with football kick to the balls tossing Maniac back into the ring, while Link plants some sweet steel music between the eyes of VO#2. Maniac is pile driven into the chair and on the outside, Link choke slams VO#2 on the concrete!
(VO#1 attempts a power bomb on Maniac Mike and as Mike goes up, his head collides with the referee who is obviously too close knocking him out cold! Link tosses a practically dead VO#2 into the ring, while on the opposite side of the ring, Maniac is gaining the advantage over VO#1.)
Ryan: The Crazy Ones are in the drivers seat....
Bytchoff: NO! Brass knucks to the face of Maniac and VO#1 props him up on the top rope looking for a top rope power bomb!
Ryan: Link can't see what's happening as he connects with a brain buster on the discarded steel chair!
Bytchoff: LOOK OUT!!!!
(Suddenly from the back races Mr. batee former WeWA Chairman and blasting VO#1 in the face with flash of flames, Mike hits a top rope power bomb. The crowd goes nuts as this is the first time we have seen the mentally ill Mr. batee in weeks. Mr. batee shakes the referee, and slapping the mat in a daze the crowd screams. 1.. 2.. 3!!!!!)
Ryan: Good Gawwd Mr. batee has done it, he has given the Crazy Ones the victory and the belts!!
Stuffher: Ladies and gentlemen, your winners of the bout, and NEW WeWA Tag Team Champions of the WOOOORLD! Maniac Mike and Missing Link, The Crazy Ones!!!!!!!!!
Bytchoff: Mr. batee just handed The Crazy Ones a their titles, and lets see if we can hear what he's saying.
(As Vital Operations recovers in the ring, Mr. batee turns at the curtain raising the new champions hands in the air.)
Mr. batee: See boys, if you what something done, sometimes you just need to do it yourself! Lets go champs, the stench of Canada is making me sick!
Link: PAAAAAAAIIINNNNNN!!!!!
Mike: Heh Heh... champs!
Bytchoff: Well Vital Operations has been robbed and I have just been told, we have Matsui Lee the President of Japan All Pro Wrestling on the line with us. Mr. Lee, how is life over in the land of the rising sun?
(With a picture of Mr. Lee on the Ovaltron, the following is said.)
Mr. Lee: Hello Duba "U" e Duba "U" A! What I have witnessed tonight is a robbery in the action! Mr. batee had no right to get his sticky fingers in the cookies. That is why next week, Vital Operation... will get a rematch for the tag titles lost tonight, and Mr. batee will be banned from the building! Good night, and good fortune!
(The ovaltron fades and the commentary picks up once again.)
Bytchoff: Fans you heard it here first! The Crazy Ones will be forced to defend their belts next week and as an added stipulation, Mr. batee is banned from the building! Up now we have Alastor Stonewall verses Eddie Outlaw ready to explode. Allison Larit, Alastor's girlfriend has just taken her seat at ringside and good lord, not again!
Ryan: Stonewall once again must face not only his opponent in the ring, but an emotional roller coaster outside the ring.
Bytchoff: Lets go to the ring!
Stuffher: Ladies and gentlemen, our next bout is scheduled for one fall with a one hour time limit! The winner of this bout, will be considered the new number two contender for the WeWA Intercontinental Hardcore Championship! Now making his way down to ringside, weighing in at 280 pounds, and standing an amazing 6'9" tall. He hails from Pittsburgh Pennsylvania and is a person of many accomplishments. This man is feared by many, and has lost to few. This man is Alastor Stonewall!!!
(The lights dim till only a few icy blue lights are shining over the entranceway. "Falling Away From Me" by Korn begins to play as a video package plays on the Ovaltron of Alastor Stonewall performing various devastating maneuvers to other wrestlers. The, the heavy metal part of the song hits, and BOOM! Smoke shoots across the opening and red lasers fly back an forth. Suddenly Alastor appears looking quite intense and slowly raising his head up, begins to walk to ringside. Entering the ring, the lights turn back on, and the introductions continue.)
Ryan: He's just staring at Allison.
Bytchoff: This is an unhealthy love.
Stuffher: And his opponent, he comes to us straight from the Garden State of New Jersey. This tremendous athlete boasts not only a win over the world champion, but a very impressive win lose record. Welcome to Canada, the one and only, Eddie Outlaw!
(The lights in the arena cut out and as the Team Outlaw logo pulses on the ovaltron illuminating the arena, "Better than You" by Metallica begins to play. A few shots of pyro go off as the logo continues to pulsate in unison. Entering the stadium through the strobe effect is the ever so lovely CC wearing her CC T-shirt tied into a knot revealing her tight stomach. Wearing a short pair of red spandex shorts and high black boots, CC blows a kiss to the crowd as Dakota Dave makes his way out wearing blue jeans and an "I love Mike Johnson" T-shirt. They both stand at the front of the curtain, and just as the chorus belts out, Eddie Outlaw parts the curtains and Eddie smiles to the biggest round of boos of the evening. Garbage is tossed in the aisles, and as he get hit in the head with a soda pop, Eddie replies, "F*cking backwards Canadians!" After a short pause, Eddie enters the ring liberally extending his middle finger in Alastors direction.)
Ryan: Eddie Outlaw is pacing back and forth like a caged lion!
Bytchoff: There's fire in Stonewall's eyes and this one is finally coming to a head. The referee calls for the bell and here we GO!
(Stonewall races across the ring like a madman and firing off punches like a out of control machine gun, and Eddie can only try but to cover up. Alastor grabs the top rope as Eddie goes to one knee and placing his wrestling boots into the throat of Outlaw, begins to choke Eddie. The referee demands the hold be released and Stonewall agrees but begins stomping out of control and Eddie is hurt!)
Ryan: Stonewall started out with a flurry of attacks and I can only guess he's thinking of the lovely Allison!
Bytchoff: Alastor is burning up a ton of energy early and sending Outlaw into the ropes, connects with a point blank drop kick to the face. Down goes Eddie and Stonewall makes a cover. 1.. 2..
Ryan: Is that it?
Bytchoff: Eddie kicks out and this one continues with a poke to the eyes of Stonewall by Outlaw!
(On the outside, CC is banging the apron yelling words of encouragement into the ring. Dave is behind CC following suite, and with one thudding belly to belly Eddie takes over. Alastor seems to have tired himself out, and picking up Stonewall by his bizarre green beard, Eddie T-bone's him into the logo! CC is calling for a power bomb and wiping the sweat from his brow, Eddie drills Alastor into the canvas. Dave clenches his fist as CC jumps up and down liberally bouncing from within the confines of her tight shirt. Up off the mat and into a power slam via an Irish whip and Dave points to his head!)
Ryan: Outlaw is climbing the ropes, and this could only mean his new move, the "loaded chamber" [flying testicle head butt] Soaring off the top rope, Allison Larit screams from the crowd and Stonewall rolls to the side at the last moment!
Bytchoff: Stonewall with a kip up and it looks like the big man was playing possum!
(Stonewall soften ups Eddie with a scoop slam and finishing it off with a pile driver, this ones looks over. The cover and the count. 1.. 2.. 3! The referee turns for the timekeeper and yelling two the bout continues. On the outside CC engages in an argument with Allison and Dakota Dave becomes the middle man.)
CC: You want some bitch! At least I know how to please my man!
Allison: You have no class, now why don't you go change and show some respect for yourself. You have no class CC, and if it wasn't for silicone, I doubt you could even swim!
(Dave pulls back the lunging CC and a huge thud is made by an Alastor Stonewall spine buster. Eddie is in pain, and looking toward Team Outlaw signals for Dave to enter. The referee catches the motion and threatening DQ, Dave is forced to remain on the outside while Stonewall not only hits a vertical suplex, but finishes it off with a brain buster. Eddie legs shakes, and the crowd cheers screaming. 1.. 2.. 3!!!! The crowd explodes and the referee signals three but waves his hands yelling two and the bout still continues.)
Bytchoff: What a match we are seeing between two titans in this sport! Irish Whip into the ropes and as Eddie stops short of the back body drop, he pulls downward with a hard DDT! German suplex into a Death Valley Driver and grabbing his crotch in front of Allison, tells her to "suck on this"! Irish whip into a power slam and the suddenly Roy Douglass appears on the apron. The referee stops Roy from entering failing to count the cover by Outlaw.
Ryan: Dakota Dave with a chair to Stonewall and Eddie just hit SUNSET!!!!!!!!!!!
(Roy drops down from the apron at the same time Dakota bails and spinning around, the referee makes the count. 1.. 2.. 3!!!!!!)
Ryan: It's over and my god Alastor Stonewall has been robbed!
Bytchoff: Look out!!!!!!
(Suddenly out from the crowd, Karl Davis enters the ring, grabs Eddie by the throat, and begins to apply the illegal double fisted choke hold. Eddie's body falls limp and as Dakota Dave jumps in, Davis chokes the life out of him too. CC now enters and as the crowd cheers, Davis grabs her by the hair.)
Ryan: She's a girl you stupid pig!!!!!!
Bytchoff: Don't do it Karl!!!
(Suddenly Karl's smile turns into one of hate, as he begins to strangle CC with all his might. Her arms flail in the air like a rag doll, and dumping her to the mat, Karl shows no further emotion for the injured. Stepping over the top ropes, the crowd cautiously parts like the red sea, and Davis disappears.)
Bytchoff: Fans, Alastor has rolled to ringside and Team Outlaw is completely dismantled! Eddie Outlaw has won the match, but one has to wonder if there is anything Karl Davis will not do. Folks, this Davis scares me, and regardless of the fact, this man has been in jail, he simply makes me think of my own mortality. Oh no, fans Stonewall is addressing Allison Larit, and the mysterious letter she has.
(Moving in close, we can hear Stonewall pleading for Allison to please show him the letter.)
Allison: This letter says her name is Susan, and she's a dancer. It talks about how much you love her, and how you can never live without her. I'm not going into the rest, but you can read it for yourself.
(Taking the letter, Alastor begins to explain about Susan, but when he looks up, Allison is gone. The fans really feel for the broken hearted Stonewall, and as he makes his way to the back, the fans give the green bearded wrestler a HUGE pop.)
Bytchoff: Well Stonewall said he would explain, but Allison just wouldn't listen.
Ryan: What a bitch!
Bytchoff: Please Ryan, lets not add fuel to the fire. Fans, our squared circle is cleared, and it's time for our three way dance. Lets go to the ring!
Stuffher: Ladies and gentlemen, this bout is set for one fall with a 45 minute time limit! The winner of this match, will get a choice of meeting the WeWA World Television Champion. OR The current WeWA Intercontinental Hardcore Champion. Already in the ring to my left, he hails from Yonkers NY, lets give it up for Johnny Extreme!
(Johnny climbs the top turn buckle and raising his hands into the air, absorbs the big pop!)
Ryan: Johnny seems to be only a step behind each time he steps in the ring and it's my opinion, it's time for him to shine!
Bytchoff: Shine is right! There aren't many who don't respect this athlete, and if he just steps up his game, this guy could be one of the elite.
Stuffher: And to my left, hailing from Dallas Texas, he is 1/2 of the former WeWA World Tag Team Champions. Put your hands together for Luther Dayne!
(The ladies eyes well up with tears as Dayne nods with approval.)
Ryan: Eric some people are saying, The New Family broke down, and in the back rumors are floating around of a breakup that is being concealed from the public.
Bytchoff: Well if that's true I haven't heard it. And if the rumors hold up I can only say this. The New Family was a great Tag Team, and it's a gosh darn shame!
Stuffher: And finally, about to enter the ring, coming to us by way of Brazil! He is known throughout the world as "The Ambassador" Spaz Forte!
(The curtain remains still.)
Stuffher: The Ambassador Spaz FORTE!!!!!
Ryan: Probably off doing an anti-freeze commercial.
Bytchoff: Pipe down!
Stuffher: Spaz FORTE!!!!!!!
(On the third call, the curtain parts and out comes Forte in his street clothes with a shirt that says, "Fear the Foi". In his hand, he carries a closed violin case, and placing it in front of Ryan Ross, he enters the ring.)
Bytchoff: Hang on folks, Johnny Extreme and Spaz Forte have begun to argue, LOOK OUT!!!!
(Fed up with waiting for the match to start, Luther Dayne charges with a freight train-like shoulder block knock both of his opponents to the mat. Spaz's head collides with Johnny's and this gives Dayne the early advantage. Irish whip into the turn buckle by Dayne on Extreme and Johnny is driven into the canvas with a power slam! Forte charges but Dayne hits a clothes line sending Spaz into a 360!! Forte spins like a pinwheel and the crowd goes crazy! Extreme staggers to his feet and Dayne sends him back down with a discus punch. Luther with the cover on Extreme. 1.. 2.. 3!!!!)
Ryan: Luther Dayne is the man!
Bytchoff: NO! Forte breaks up the count with a vicious forearm to the base of Dayne's neck. It's Forte now sending Dayne into the ropes and leaping off his feet, Spaz connects with a flying Lariat! Extreme feels the ambassador's neck breaker and the international superstar is en fuego!
Ryan: Ay carumba! The anti-freeze guzzling Forte just nailed Luther with the muscle spasm [abdominal stretch/Atomic drop] and listen to the crowd cheer!!!!
(Forte suddenly jams the International Spike [Asian Spike with fake middle finger.] into the side of Dayne's neck and Luther cries out in pain! Kick to the head by Johnny Extreme. Rolling suplex on Forte by Extreme! Vertical suplex on Luther follows! German suplex shows Spaz Johnny's international side, and one T-bone suplex on Dayne brings this crowd to their feet!! Johnny Extreme pushes the referee out of the and charging, misses with a shoulder block! Forte lifts himself up on the ropes, and flipping over the head of Johnny executes an old school sunset flip! The referee slaps the mat, 1.. 2.. 3!!!!!)
Bytchoff: NO! Dayne breaks up the count and this one's continuing! Tossing both over the top rope, Luther Dayne lowers a big apron leg drop across both men and Canada is fired up!
(Body slamming both, Dayne grabs his mirror from the announcers table and turning towards Spaz, breaks it over his head giving him seven years bad luck! The blood begins to run free from Forte's face and while Luther admires his work, Johnny Extreme hits a side suplex on the stadium floor! Tossing Dayne into the ring, with an Irish whip into a belly to belly. Dayne's massive back hits hard and WHACK! Spaz blast Johnny over the head with a top rope steel chair symphony!)
Ryan: Spaz twists up a figure four leg lock on Luther and I think Dayne is going to submit!
Bytchoff: Not if Destroyer "King of Streets" has anything to say about it!!
(Diving into the ring with a 2X4, Destroyer reaches back but Spaz rolls out of the way. Johnny Extreme hits Destroyer with boot to the mid-section followed by a steel chair pile driver and Destroyer is busted open!! Destroyer is out of the ring now and Johnny Extreme follows sick and damn tired of people interfering in his match ups! Raining down about 15 punches in a row, Spaz hits Dayne with Down Beat [back hand spring DDT], and the referee slaps the mat. 1.. 2.. 3!!!!)
Ryan: Destroyer cripples to the ground! Spaz gets the duke! And my god, Johnny Extreme has had victory ripped from his hands again.
Bytchoff: Fans, Johnny just walked down the aisle and I believe the people who he just addressed, had this to say.
Fan: Johnny says that if he should lose next week, he will retire from the WeWA.
Bytchoff: I'm not sure how much of that is true, but if I can plead with Johnny Extreme, I would say this. Don't toss your career away, just adapt, and over come the obstacle presented. Our ring is clear and it's unfortunately time for the cold blooded madman "Assassin" Karl Davis to take on Troy Flash. Lets go to the ring!
Stuffher: Ladies and gentlemen, this next bout is scheduled for one fall with a one hour time limit! Already in the ready warming up, this is Troy Flash!
(The Canadian crowd pops a bit as Troy continues to warm up in his corner.)
Ryan: Flash is going to lose again this week.
Bytchoff: Well Troy has been having a tough week in his training camp and if he goes down to a loss, I think he should just chalk it up to bad place, bad time.
Stuffher: And his opponent, the man who has one of the most devastating choke holds in the business. Entering, the "Assassin" Karl Davis!
(The curtain parts and Karl stomps out of the back, with an extra large ax in his left hand. Yanking off his black bandanna and revealing a huge scar on his forehead, he continues to storm towards ringside never taking his eyes off of Flash. Security floods the area and removing the ax from Davis, he chokes one of them out with a double fisted clench for getting in his way. Stepping over the top rope, his eyes continue to burn a hole through Troy and suddenly he charges!!)
Ryan: Fire in the hole!
Bytchoff: Here we GO!
(Troy Flash dodges the attack and catching Davis off balance connects with a jumping chin breaker! Big tough vertical suplex on the big man and hooking the leg the count is made. 1.. 2.. 3!!!!!!)
Ryan: He got him!
Bytchoff: Shocked the world!
(The referee holds up two fingers and the match continues as Davis kicks out at 1. Rotating Davis to his feet, Troy pile drives Davis into the mat and as the referee counts 1.. 2.. 3!!!!! Karl kicks out at two! Flash takes a deep breath shaking his head and goes for a body slam, but Davis surprises him with a unorthodox small package. 1.. 2.. 3!!!!!! It's Flash's turn to kick out and the match continues as the crowd begins to buzz. Flash gets back to his feet and drilling Davis with a Death Valley Driver. Hooking the leg another count is made, 1.. 2.. 3!!!!!!)
Ryan: Jumping Troy Flash!
Bytchoff: Jumping is right because he just flew off of Davis and this one continues!
(Davis head butts Troy and gets aggressive with an impressive brain buster followed by a thudding DDT into the mat. Davis grunts as he shakes off the hurt from the early attack and tightening his hands together, puts on an angry suplex special for the crowd. First is the gut wrench suplex! BOOM! Second the German suplex! Crash! And finally a high flying belly to belly. Stomping down, Davis cries out to the crowd in a deep voice, MORE!!!!??????)
Bytchoff: The crowd boos and Davis just doesn't care!
(Picking up Flash off the canvas, Karl sets Troy up for a big boot to the face courtesy of a powerful Irish whip! Staggering into the ropes, and back towards Karl Davis. Davis with a tomb stone and the referee begins to take a close look at Troy Flash. Placing Troy on the top rope, Karl Davis calls for a top rope power bomb when the Outlaw symbol begins to pulse on the Ovaltron. The referee turns from Davis and Flash because Cc's has jumped up onto the apron. From behind, Eddie Outlaw blasts Karl across the back with a steel chair and as Davis falls backwards, he hits a super plex on Troy Flash. From the back come Spaz Forte and decking Dakota Dave with Down Beat [hand spring DDT] Dave is knocked out cold! Forte grabs CC by the hair and as she screams, Eddie bails from the ring, coming to her rescue. Outlaw and Spaz begins slugging it out as CC is tossed into the guard rail.)
Ryan: ASSASSINATION!!!!!! [Spinning choke slam]
Bytchoff: Referee in position and here's the count. 1.. 2.. 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ryan: Davis pins Flash and breathing with slow controlled breaths, Outlaw dives back into the ring. Forte screams....
Spaz: "Hey Davis, YOU SUCK DONKEY NUTS!!!!!!"
(Karl's blood begins to race and turning around to see who had the balls to utter the insult, catches Eddie before the sneak attack with the two fisted choke hold. Squeezing with all his might, and with his eyes wide open, Eddie collapses in the center of the ring, and Karl exits without an emotional response.)
Ryan: I don't know what to say.
Bytchoff: Please just don't say donkey nuts.
Ryan: Deal.
Bytchoff: Well folks, Spaz has taken it to the back and did you see the sarcastic smile on Forte's face as he went into the back?
Ryan: Yes I did and Forte better be careful because....
(Suddenly the Ovaltron lights up and Spaz is on the screen in tears. Wiping away the sorrow, he tells the following.)
Spaz: It was awful! We were getting YRW back together, I went out to check the tire pressure, and then I heard a boom. The RV shook, and when I opened the door, Kid Evil was lying on the floor. I just told him to make the burgers, my god it could have been me. Evil is so hurt, and if he doesn't make it, he told me he wants yours truly to be the new BACW Heavyweight Champion. I will pray as I hope you do for a speedy recovery.
(The ovaltron fades with Spaz sobbing out of control.)
Ryan: WHAT!!!! I heard of no such accident!
Bytchoff: Fans, Kid Evil has apparently been caught up in some type of explosion and from what Forte is telling us, Kid Evil is scratched once again from the Thursday Night card. This is horrible.
Ryan: I'm getting out of here Eric, I smell a hedgehog!!
Bytchoff: Get out of here you Kid Evil mark, leave! Go on! Well fans, it's just me and it seems our three way dance has been chopped to 2! Fans Snake Eyes and Mike Johnson want at it SO bad, they have decided to do away with the introductions. Both men have entered into combat zone, so let go to the ring!
(After checking both men for foreign objects, referee Mario Lane signals for the bell and both me walk into the center of the ring. Snake wastes no time slapping Mike Johnson right in the face and Johnson returns the insult with some red mist into the champion's eyes. Snake rubs the sting and after kendo sticking the world champion over the head, Johnson connects with his patented side Russian Kendo Sweep! The world champion is dazed and balancing in the middle of the top rope, Johnson splashes down with Air Senton (senton bomb). The compression on the chest of Snake Eyes forces the oxygen from his lungs just long enough for Mike Johnson to tie him to the tree of Woe. Whack! Whack! Whack! Whack! Whack! Johnson begins to flog Snake with the weapon and the referee breaks up the hold. Flopping down from the turn buckle, the welts raise on the World Champions chest as the crowd begins to cheer!!)
Bytchoff: The World champion looks tired, drained, and if this were for his belt, I would think Johnson would be a shoe-in. I have never seen Snake so flat, and looking at his body, it does seem like he even trained this week. Good Lord Snake is going to be DDT'd off the top rope and if this happens, it's all over! Where the hell is Ryan!!!
(Twirling his finger in the air, Snake lifts up hard and pushing Johnson up/outward, sends "The Man" onto his face hard. The crowd boos, but Snake take control with a flying clothes line off the top rope. Mike's head snaps back but he gets to his feet dazed. Foot sweep by Snake and as Johnson gets up one more time, Snake goes low with a chop block!)
Bytchoff: NO!!! Johnson's knee looks like it may have been sprained and folks, he's rolling around on the floor in pain. Snake Eyes has just attempted to hurt Mike Johnson and folks, this is not a game between these two men.
(Applying a sharp shooter, tears come to Mike's eyes but he refuses to even look into the referee face. The ref is screaming for Johnson to just give up, and altering his hold, Snake slams Johnson's knee into the mat and locks up a Texas clover leaf. Johnson begins to pound the mat and....)
Bytchoff: JOHNSON QUITS!!!!!! That could be devastating to his career!!
(The fans explode in protest but as the referee waves off the timekeeper he screams for everyone to hear, "TWO!" Just then, the Ovaltron lights up and we see Ryan Ross, screaming at a closed broom closet.)
Ross: Anthony? Anthony!!! Are you in there?
(A muffled and very pissed off voice responds.)
Kid Evil: Friggin Spaz locked me up in this closet! Ryan, is the match still going?
Ryan: I hear the cheers, and I don't know. Hang on, I'll get you out!
(The Ovaltron fades and as we pick up the action in the ring, Snake drills home a spike pile driver. German suplex is next to follow and with Johnson barely able to put any press on his knee, Snake Eyes entangles his legs with a brutal figure four leg lock. Rocking back and tugging on the toe of Johnson, Mike begins to pass out.)
Bytchoff: Johnson is dead center in the middle of the ring, and I don't think he's going to take much more. Snake Eyes has him beat, what the hell?
(Just then trash fills the isle and obscenities are vocally projected as Kid Evil races down the isle with a mop in his hands. The referee raises Johnson's hand once, and if flops to the mat. Raising it again, it's apparent Mike Johnson is simply not going to respond.)
Bytchoff: The referee raises Johnson's hand for a third time, and LOOK OUT!!!!!
(CRACK! Kid Evil literally breaks the wooden portion over Snake head. The referee stops counting, and as Kid Evil climbs the top rope, he hits the world heavyweight champion with his new finisher "Smooth" [Senton Bomb]. Hooking the leg hard, the referee slams his hand down on the mat. One.. Two.. Three!!!!
Bytchoff: You've got to be kidding me.
Ryan: [now back at ringside] Kid is right you non-believer! Kid Evil has just pinned the world champion and good gawwwd I feel.....
(Passing out, Ryan falls to the ground and Eric begins to fan him with his coat. Johnson is barely coherent, and rolling from the ring, grabs his IC Hardcore title and is helped up the aisle by the medics. As the hardcore champion makes his way to the back, a loud crash is heard, and turning about, you can see the steel cage above has fallen from ten feet above, locking in Snake and Evil.)
Bytchoff: The lights!!!!
(As the lights go out, we hear someone scream, and when they come back up, Mike Johnson's championship belt is gone. Johnson looks down at his empty hands, and gazing up at the ovaltron sees a view of his dressing room. From behind the camera's view, the mysterious hand replaces the WeWA World Hardcore Championship belt on a simple folding chair, and a voice whispers.
Voice: What do you seek?
(The scene fades and the commentators pick up the closing of this very bizarre ending.)
Bytchoff: The cage has been practically jacked up and as Kid Evil leaves to the sounds of "Asshole", we are quickly running out of time.
Ryan: Well these fans are jackoffs and now that Kid Evil has pinned the world champion 123 without anyone's help, listen to the block buster card we have for you next week! Just signed from the Tokyo Dome in Japan, Mike Johnson verses Karl Davis II for his newly named WeWA World Hardcore Champion! Yes folks you heard right, the IC has been dropped and because of legal issues with Matsui Lee, this is no longer an International belt alone.
Bytchoff: Thank heavens!
Ryan: Also on the card, World Tag Team Champion pits the new world champs the Crazy Ones in a rematch with Vital Operations! Seems Mastui Lee didn't like the appearance of Mr. batee and folks, Mr. batee is BANNED from the Egg Dome!
Bytchoff: That's just wrong! I'm sure Mike and Link will have something to say about that stipulation.
Ryan: The return of Stevey Sinsiter as he takes on Lee Riel for his World Television Champion! And believe it or not, because of tonight's actions by
"Smooth" Kid Evil.. The WeWA World Heavyweight Champion Snake Eyes has already demanded a re-match, and yes, the world title will be on the line!
Bytchoff: This is an angry mistake made by the champion, because everyone knows, Kid Evil just doesn't lose in Japan! It's something about the Egg Dome, and in front of what's going to be a very hostile crowd! Well we are out of time, so on behalf of the WeWA, Komona, and our sponsors Nobody Inc., we bid you good night, and see you next week from Tokyo Japan!
end TNE
>