Isn�t she beautiful?� Isn�t she just about the prettiest thing you�ve ever seen?� I can�t say enough about her, other than I love her, and I sometimes feel as if she knows this, and that she stops in and checks up on me from time to time, from the beyond.

It was Henry Miller who introduced me to Anais.� (Most of my best friends are dead authors.)

She�s another perfect example of why America is so beautiful.

Yet, why is it always people like her, like Henry, like anybody who dares to speak the truth and march to a different step�why are they always the ones so viciously attacked?� Or if not attacked, they�re written off as crackpots and freaks?

It has happened too many times in America.� Honest to God it has�too many times.

But by God as I am living, it is not the Rush Limbaughs, the J. Edgar Hoovers, the Ronald Reagans, or the Bill O�Reilly�s that make this country beautiful � quite the contrary � it is the Anais Nin�s.

The lovers.� The dreamers.� The ones who reach out to include instead of control.

She dropped out of school when she was 16.� She dropped out because her classmates were cruel plebeians and her teacher a controlling spinster who took personal offense at original thinking.� In spite of that, Anais (An-ah-ees) is widely regarded as one of the most intelligent women who has ever lived.

Why was a high-school dropout so intelligent?� The answer is simple, really: she read books, and she wrote down her thoughts.

She died in 1976, when I was 13, from cancer.� She was just beginning to be recognized for her talents, too, on a popular level.�

As much as I love her, her books aren�t really that good.� I think she knew this and would agree.� But her diary...in her diary she was immortal.

I started with Volume II after I had seen the movie Henry and June.� One of the knuckle-heads at work, a vice-president, derided the film for being too racy.� He too was a knuckle-dragging plebeian in corporate clothing, so I figured if he didn�t like it, it would be worth seeing.� That�s when I put two and two together and figured out she was a real person and a friend of Henry Miller�s.� So I bought her book.

It was like�stage two of my personal metamorphosis.� I have never been the same since, and everywhere that I go I look for pieces of Anais; I look for the things that make the mundane world beautiful.

One of these days, I�ll try to link a *.wav file of her voice here, so you can hear her soul.

Until then, I�ll have to satisfy you with some of my favorite excerpts.� These are from Linotte, her childhood diary from 1914 to 1920, age 11 to 17.

�This morning I went to Communion and I found that I haven�t changed.� The ritual of the Mass absolutely does not touch my heart.� I understand the Creator and his Wonders much better when I listen to music or when I watch the sun setting behind the trees in the forest which are still covered with snow crystals�.�

��a book by Maeterlinck that I kissed two or three times before letting go of it.�

�The other day we talked about patriotism.� Like the true Artist�s children that we are, we realize that we aren�t really attached to any country.� I discovered that my love for France existed purely in my imagination, not in my heart.� I would like to explain to you the confusion that reigns between those two kingdoms, for each considers itself the All-Powerful Ruler, but in truth, imagination is the real victor, a thousand to one!

�I imagine that he is a true poet, loyal, intelligent, cultivated and not at all realistic, but that last color is inseparable from the richness of the color of poets, I am sure.�

��My mind is my kingdom,� says Tupper, and my kingdom is so big that it has contrasts and discussions, such as there are in every kingdom.� This evening all my emotions and my thoughts are united in one vague and powerful sadness.� I already feel the influence of solitude and silence.� Little by little, this sensitive spiritual suffering is becoming sweet and beautiful in its bitterness.�

�I have wept with Alfred de Musset and Shelly, and as I dry my tears, I feel that I have learned something and that a few sublime thoughts are worth a few tears!�

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