I’ll come right out and say it: I’m a cocktail snob. Although I strongly
support everyone’s
prerogotive to drink
or not drink any beverage they wish (in moderation, of course), I can’t
help but cringe at
the thought of certain
creation’s of the mixologist’s art. So while you’re free to disagree
and do whatever
you darn well please
with your own cocktail hour, here’s my take on the “correct” choices for
drinks with
friends-a list of
cocktails for cocktail idealogues, if you will.
1).
The Martini. Although technically a mixed drink, not a cocktail
(since it only has two ingredients),
it reigns supreme in the cocktail pantheon. Cool, spare, elegant,
the very embodiment of that
which is meant to be sipped, not gulped. A perfect mix of dryness
and flavor to whet the appetite
and warm the soul. The only true Martini is made with gin, and the
modern fetish for dryness is
vastly overdone. Good gin yields a complex and subtle mix
of herbal flavors which vermouth
complements very well. Don’t mix it any drier that 10-1 gin-to-vermouth.
Don’t give in to the
flavorless and soulless vodka martini (which drives so many to absurdism
with “chocolate” and
“Cajun” and who-knows-what-all Martinis!). And never, ever serve
a Martini on the rocks.
2).
The Manhattan. Second only to the Martini in the cocktail
hierarchy, a Manhattan is somewhat
sweeter and makes a good desert and a nice drink for sitting around the
fire. A Manhattan is about
3-1 whiskey to sweet vermouth, shaken over ice and strained into a cocktail
glass. I prefer mine
with bourbon and red vermouth. Garnish with a maraschino cherry
3).
The Zombie. The 300-pound gorilla of cocktails, Zombies pack
a wallop and are perfect for days
on the beach and backyard BBQs. Well-mixed, a Zombie packs a punch
even as the ice melts.
Mix 1 oz. each of lime juice, lemon juice and pineapple juice (all unsweetened),
a dash of bitters,
and a jigger each of white, dark, and gold rum over cracked ice.
Shake and pour unstrained into a
tiki mug, garnish with a pineapple wedge and as much fruit as you can fit
on a cocktail pick.
4).
The Cosmopolitan. One of the few recent cocktail inventions
I think works well, the
Cosmopolitan is pleasant and undemanding. Mix 1 ¼ oz. lemon-flavored
vodka, ¼ oz. lime
juice, ¼ oz. Cointreua or Triple Sec, and 2 oz. cranberry juice
over ice, shake and strain into a
cocktail glass. If you don’t have lemon vodka, use plain vodka and
add a dash of lemon juice.
Garnish with a twist or slice of lime.
5).
Highballs and Tonics. Highballs cover a broad range of drinks,
which are generally mixes of
either whiskey, gin or vodka and either soda, ginger ale or cola.
Generally the proportion is 1-1,
stirred with ice in a highball glass. Tonics are gin or vodka mixed
with tonic water-get the good
stuff with quinine in it to ward off malaria! Tonics are a bit bitter,
but quite refreshing. Stir with
ice and serve in a Collins glass. Both are garnished with a slice
of lime or lemon, and they’re
quick, easy and great on a hot day.
6).
Neat and On The Rocks. Liquor served over ice (“rocks”) or
alone (“neat”) allows purists to
experience good booze without distraction. Sip slowly! Ice
or a splash of water moderates the
harshness of some liquors, allowing the enjoyment of all the flavors and
complexity.
7).
Without. You don’t have to include alcohol to enjoy cocktails.
Try mixers alone, and no one will
be able to tell you’re not really having a highball! Straight cranberry
and lime juice with a twist of
lemon is impossible to tell from a cosmopolitan at a glance, and lets you
lord it with a cocktail
glass in hand without risking a hangover the next day. The mix of
fruit juices in a Zombie is fine
with no rum and is packed with vitamin C. Add a splash of grenadine
to cola or soda water, or try
plain tonic with lime or lemon. You can be creative, have fun, and
still be the designated driver!
Most of all, remember
that the bottom line on cocktails is to have refreshments you like with
people whose
company you enjoy.
If I haven’t mentioned your favorite bevarage (or even if I’ve disparaged
it!), keep
enjoying it anyway.
You don’t need some self-important radio guy to tell you how to have fun.
The
Cocktail Hour is your
time to relax, unwind and enjoy... Thanks for listening to the Cocktail
Hour, and
thanks for your generous
support of KCSB-FM!