Paperback writer Dear Sir or Madam, will you read my book? It took me years to write, will you take a look? It's based on a novel by a man named Lear And I need a job, so I want to be a paperback writer Paperback writer It's the dirty story of a dirty man And his clinging wife doesn't understand His son is working for the Daily Mail It's a steady job but he wants to be a paperback writer Paperback writer Paperback writer It's a thousand pages, give or take a few I'll be writing more in a week or two I can make it longer if you like the style I can change it round and I want to be a paperback writer Paperback writer If you really like it you can have the rights It could make a million for you overnight If you must return it, you can send it here But I need a break and I want to be a paperback writer Paperback writer Paperback writer Paperback writer, paperback writer Paperback writer, paperback writer Paperback writer, paperback writer Paperback writer, paperback writer (fade out)

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