- Analysts Struggle, Too -
20 July 2007
Alright, a few administrative issues before my brief rant for today. First off, I’ve decided to stop grading myself for lack of website updates over a 2 month span. It would seem to appear that I can’t do much better than an update every 2 months, so what’s the point in getting all worked up about it, right? I apologize to the handful of people out there who actually read this (mostly as a result of my arm-twisting) and would like more frequent updates… I will keep trying, my friends, if you keep putting up with my poor attempts at humor.
And that’s the second thing. I am fully aware that my meager set of “columns” thus far revolves almost solely around the topic of commentators and announcers not being able to do their jobs correctly. I suppose that my fascination with said topic has something to do with the fact that I would myself love to be a commentator/announcer, that I have been performing impromptu readings/announcing of imaginary sporting events in the shower and in the car since I was little, and that I’m 100% sure that I could step in for 95% of the losers and former professional athletes behind a mic right now and do a better job with absolutely no preparation. No doubt about it. Nevertheless, in light of my dedication to this subject, I am planning on reorganizing my website a bit to put all writings on that topic in one place and to actually incorporate a few other topics onto my site every once in a while.
To sum up everything to this point: I will continue to strive for more regular upkeep of this site, and I will try to start being more entertaining from now on. And yeah, come the first of October, I probably won’t have changed a thing yet. So there. Okay, time for my rant of the week.
So I’m sitting there on Monday evening watching the ESPN telecast of the Giants and Cubs from Wrigley. I could easily write 3,000 words about how tired I am of hearing every 2007 Giants game (and actually, many non-Giant games as well) turn into a litany of facts about Barry Bonds and an ongoing discussion of where his accomplishments rank among the all-time greats whilst that apparently annoying and terribly inconvenient live event is going on in the background, but I’m not going to go there (even though I think I speak for most of humanity on that subject). I could easily write about Erin Andrews’ interview of 3 NASCAR drivers sitting in the bleachers whilst that apparently annoying and terribly inconvenient live event is going on in the background, but I’m not going to go there either. Instead, I’m going to focus on the trade of Jason Kendall for Rob Bowen and a minor league pitcher, which was announced in about the fifth inning of the game.
Cue Rick Sutcliffe, who was the analyst for this particular telecast. When Sut was informed of the trade on air, he started going on about how terrific of a pickup Kendall was for the Cubs and how dramatically he was going to improve their club. Now, I will certainly concede that Kendall is a solid defense catcher, signal-caller, hard-worker, and clubhouse presence by all accounts. I’ve always liked the guy (and not just because he’s from Southern California). For all we know, the younger Bowen could be as well. Frankly, the only two things I know about Bowen is that he couldn’t seem to throw out any basestealers in San Diego (where they got him from weeks earlier in exchange for teammate-fighting Michael Barrett, who couldn’t throw out anyone either) and that my girlfriend thinks he’s kind of cute.
But I digress… back to Sutcliffe. Rick was getting all fired up about Kendall’s offense, at one point referring to a quote from Chicago manager Lou Pinella that went along the lines of the following: “After Barrett was traded, I’d come to the ballpark every day and pull out a lineup card and the first thing I’d do is put the catcher in the 8-spot in the batting order.” Now, Sutcliffe claimed, Lou wouldn’t have to do that anymore. After all, he went on to say, Kendall was a .297 career hitter and really “knew how to hit.” Lou would be able to bat him all over the order and would notice an immediate improvement in his team’s offensive output. He went on for another few minutes, but I missed the rest of his gushing because I was laughing so hard.
You know how people say that stats lie? Well, they certainly lie in this case. Care to take a guess at Kendall’s average this season? How about .222 with an anemic .261 on-base-percentage and 3 homers over the last 2 and a half seasons combined, which just may have contributed to the A’s being willing to dump him and his relatively large salary. Yes, I know that Bowen is only hitting .212 and current Cub backup Koyie Hill is at .179 (by the way, Barrett happens to be at .259 with 9 HRs), but I wouldn’t exactly call a .222 average an offensive upgrade worth spouting off about. The only Cub with any kind of significant playing time this season who is batting lower than that is 22-year-old rookie Felix Pie (.216). Even starting pitcher Carlos Zambrano is batting .250 with 2 HRs. I guess what Sutcliffe meant is that on days Zambrano starts, Lou can pencil in Kendall in the 9-spot.
For the record, Kendall made his Cubs debut the following day against the same Giants and shockingly went 0-3, though he did bat seventh. On Thursday (his second start as a Cub), he was 0-2 in the eighth spot. I’m just saying.
