Re: Pop's Last Ride -- News 
 
Author: Randy Snott
Email: Vommyt1@mapSoN.primenet.com
Date: 1998/10/28
Forums: alt.tasteless 

My cat was a holy terror in his youth. Various dead things ( gophers,
mice, birds, and some things that were unidentifiable) were left at
the doorstep for our entertainment. One fine afternoon while I was
washing my car,my cat was sunning himself on the driveway. My not so
bright neighbor was walking his dog and saw my cat. He yells
out,"Wouldn't it be funny if I let my dog loose?" I said that it sure
would and why doesn't he try it. He unhooks his little black mutt and
the dog tears up the driveway towards the cat. Kitty leaps up into the
air and latches on to the dog's back. With three of his paws locked
into the sides of the dog, he swipes violently and repeatedly (the way
cats do) at the dogs tender nose and eyes. The sound of the dog
howling almost made me feel bad, but the comical sight of the neighbor
running over and screaming,"Get it offa him!! He's hurting him!!" made
those feelings quickly subside. I told him to get it off himself, he
let the dog loose and why should I risk major bodily injury to help. I
thought he was going to cry right there, but he sucked it up and
attempted to remove my cat from his now whelping and moaning dog. ( In
retrospect, I do feel bad for the dog, it wasn't his fault he had a
tard for an owner.) My cat bites him on the hand on his first try, so
he tries to get him from behind. This results in the cat letting go of
the dog and applying himself to the neighbor. He ran up his chest and
over the shoulder and down his back and sped off for the quiet of the
house. The neighbor hooks his dog back up to his leash and yells
something about a lawsuit. I told him to do what he thought was
necessary, and obviously never heard about it again.