Boycott Santa by Reuben D. Scott

It has come to my attention that one of the most loved men in the world is a fraud. Nicholas Clause, also known as Santa Clause, has been extorting our markets. Using the poor, homeless men and women known simply as "elves" Santa has been playing his under the guise of being a generous and kindhearted man. This is not true and I will show this to you by pointing out his corporate takeovers, his stockpiling of world funds, and his extortion of the work force.

When a child asks for a Christmas gift, who gives it to him? Santa does, as long as it is Christmas. But what about birthdays, who gives the kid the gifts then? The parents do, out of their hard-earned money. And what is the difference between the gift Santa made and the gift mommy and daddy bought? Nothing at all, they’re exactly the same. Santa may give gifts away one day out of three hundred and sixty five, but the other three hundred and sixty four days he’s rackin’ in money through his corporate takeovers. Sure, he might have started small but now every toy company is under his control. Whenever a new toy company comes out either he started it or he will purchase it to keep his tight reign on the toy industry. If you want to talk about a monopoly, Santa Clause is the original monopolizer in the toy business.

What is the difference between Tyco, Banshee, Tiger, Nintendo and many other companies? Absolutly nothing. Santa has control of them all. His elves create all of the toys you see at Christmas. Because he creates all the toys for Christmas it must mean he makes all the toys you see. If Santa makes toy ‘A’ on December 31 and then on February 2 you see the same toy in a store does that mean that the toy was made by another company other than Santa’s elves? No, of course not, the elves made toy ‘A’ and it is simply being sold under the front of an innocent company that he has taken over.

Another point is where does your money really go when you purchase a toy? Sure, it may go to the owner of the toy store at first but then it eventually goes into Santa’s greedy, fat fingers. Because of the way he runs his business his expenditures are extremely low, but his income is unrealistically high. There is an anonymous bank account somewhere where currency from hundreds of countries is being stockpiled. With all this money he could easily begin to buy out other forms of businesses in the world. Soon he may even monopolize the computer industry. If Santa is not stopped this so-called "jolly man" will run our entire economy. Is he really a jolly man or is he a power hungry tyrant?

The thing that should frighten you is that he has crashed the economy before. The great depression was a direct cause of him stockpiling currency and controling the toy economy. With a lack of currency circulating, the banks began to call in their loans but the people no longer had their money so they went to withdraw their cash from the banks. Their cash was not there. Where was their cash? In Santa’s account. The money had magicaly disappeared, but truthfully there was nothing magical about it. What is to stop Santa from doing this again? I will tell you how to stop him from doing this again: boycott him!

Everyone knows who makes Santa his toys. The elves of the North Pole work to make the toys for Christmas but they also create the toys for the rest of the days in the year. So where do these little people come from? First, who says they’re little and who says it’s one people, one race? Taking the homeless, and the starving from third world countries and giving them jobs in the North Pole may seem like an act of kindness, but is it really? Santa has taken the defenseless people out of their impoverished countries and forced them to work as slaves to manufacture toys and other appliances to help meet his means. Without pay or vacation these so called "elves" are worked bare to the bone in the cold harsh climate of the North Pole. America may be seen as a world power but there is one place even greater: the North Pole.

Taking people from their homelands is a crime; it is known as abduction and is frowned upon by nearly every country. Yet Santa abducts people out of their country all of the time. Who is to say he isn’t building an army in the North Pole? His standing as a political giant is easily seen, what about a military might? With free labor at his command he truly is a nation unto himself. With the control of the economies of the world he could make demands and there would be nothing that we could do about it.

With no expenditures, masses of money to do with as he pleases, and a monopoly, Santa Clause is a man that must be stopped. The children, youth, and yes, adults can go with out goodies for a while. Let Santa feel the harshness of no business. He may hold out longer than you or I live, but for the sake of our children, for our children’s children, and their children yet to come, end the reign of this tyrant. He does not control all of the material economy. Do not let his grasp on the earth continue to expand but rather cause it to regress. Stop this devil’s advocate in his tracks, free his slaves and reopen the toy market for the world. Let us share the American dream of ‘equality for all’ and boycott Santa Clause and his monopolization of our toy economy and stop the exploition of our innocent children.