the_book

The train whistle blows in the wind.
The clouds shine in the sky and pass by.
The sun burns through the day.
The moon lights the late night sky.
My life seems to fall apart at random.
That one person seems not there.
My life seems no longer tandem.
My eyes get lost but then begin to stare.
Departing to slumber is such painful sugariness, for she is not here to bid me fare well.
While her close in another place I wish to be able to see her now.
My heart to be thrown into pain and toil; for my mind not to know reasons why.
And as the music passes my ears and the words pass my lips, she is already gone.
And I feel sorrow for pain, for I can not complain, I still will not see her at dawn.
Then when the sun rises, the memories seep back into my pain and remembrance is to follow.
But as it comes to beckon the hurt, the reasons seem so pale and shallow.
But now the hurt is gone and ceases to exist.
She�s comes back to me.
But problems are still in present time.
In time is where I wish they would stay.
But although time is concealing, it is released in small intervals.
Time is an illusion that consists of everything and nothing.
Time is the coming of age.
The speaking of life through Time and the people that speak of the Times of hours and minutes.
But Time passes in lives as we live our days away from the ones we love.
But life will continue and we can live on.
Or can we?
Can we live in torture of the loss of the one you love?
It's not hard to read between the lines of life.
When you lose someone for the first time and not sure to ever see them again.
To have them stripped and torn from your life.
For the pain to build up in you soul.
And your body and spirit be left with a hole.
A hole to fill yourself but it seems the only good substitute is yourself.
But life goes on and so should everyone else.
To live with your mistress of strangers.
To stay and live their lives.
But to face the fear and live our own lives is something that is unheard of.
To work for themselves; do our own work; impossible.
Dare your mind ponder such things.
For the laziness of the high-speed work world we live in where nothing is done ourselves.
To do things hands-on and manually is unheard of in the world of the �daily grind�.
To get around such a thing seems to be preposterous in a state of mind.
To be different in today�s world is to be �normal�
But the ones whom I consult with would see such a thing as idiocy; hence my liking of them.
But the people of my life have developed a trait of certain boringness.
Therefore I am unaware weather to live with this, or cut my losses and restart.
But at any rate of life, my life, a piece of me, still exists in those people.
As if a part of my soul were to be theirs forever.
But if, then why am I so lonely?
Why do the people who bear my soul discard me as if some useless inanimate object?
As though my soul were a filthy rag to be thrown aside and seen as useless.
And then replaced.
Why then do I care?
Why then do our lives consist of people who we think the world of, but care not for us?
Everything they say; every word spoken is another scar on the heart of the world.
But at that, then what is freedom?
Something inalienable?
Doubtful!
Freedom is a thing stolen from us daily, hourly for that matter.
How are the children of �Generation America� supposed to express themselves?
The words they speak are those of extreme emotion.
But do they really know what those words mean?
They let the words roll off of their tongues and pass their lips without a thought in their minds.
They say these words in abundance, that of a clich�.
As these words being said, mimicking a resounding and redundant drum or cymbal.
To have these phases repeated is an aching to the mind.
The annoyance on the faces is a definite sign.
To portray a liking to another phrase, but this as well is an outlandish thought and expectance for people.
Necessary for these words to be used?
Yes, in some cases.
Although, nay good but wonderful, too much can be poisonous.
And as the venom seeps through the veins and into the brain, the body becomes use to the once deadly substance, accepting it as a natural hormone.
But then the words turn to obsession, and then onward to a drug of insanity.
The body craves and needs this attention of words.
But after realization, they see they no longer have the meaning they once did, and so another mistake is made and another piece of my soul is forfeited.
Forfeited for what!?
For who!?
For them!
The people who say their care, but that�s all they do.
To see the real and know the norm.
To have nothing but they have all of you.
To release spirit and soul into the hell storm.
But when your kamikaze mission takes finish and you return to everything you thought you never had just to have fate once again prove you wrong.
The love you longed for you find in yourself, and that is what brings forth the love from others.
Us is all we need, but them is all we think about.
To have them we must first find us.
But we don�t see that.
All we see is what we don�t have, or what lacks thereof.
Our eyes blind to the fact of the love that stares us right in the eye and jumps down our throat.
For the wound that we once thought existed but is somehow filled with the clot of their love, and that brings forth the love that you have for yourself.
But their love never existed for itself.
You are codependent on life.
Rules are what keep today�s world stable.
Stability is the enemy of the one�s who�s life isn�t complete by the that they lack.
The thought of other people is what they, we wish to fill.
To be on someone else�s pondering is what we want.
Instead all we get is them in our pondering and they never do seem to return the favor.
But at any rate of life, the people that surround you have the same effect of someone who didn�t care for you at all.
The not caring is the pain and it brings forth all evil.
The key to this is to not keep yourself locked-up inside form the one�s who hurt you.
The pain for you will soon end and life goes on.
But for them the pain that they caused you manifests in their mind, and the fact that they regret it but can�t fix it is the perfect, subconscious, revenge.
The pain of it all is such sweet bitterness that the subconscious revenge is nothing at all.
To live in the abandonment of your peers is revenge all too sweet, for them.
To spend five worthless minutes with you and then expect that short amount of time to suffice for the time that they leave you alone.
But then when you retaliate with yelling and ranting toward them, for some reason, they get offended.
As always though, your codependency on life and the world causes you emotions to crack and you apologize, and everything is �better�.
The world blinds your eyes with a veil, which is pitch black, is not removed and all you can see are the illusions they let you see.
Pick your illusions wisely.
Choose your imagination.
Follow your soul, not your nerves.
Your gut is used for digesting, not decision-making.
When you decide something, step back and look at what the outcome will be.
Decisions will be made and heartbreak will continue.
But through the mistakes of life and heartbreak, there will be freedom and love,
But through all of this there is change; change is all around us.
The change of life and the way it changes us as people is only a change for the better. Change is to always be important.
Change for the sake of change is pointless.
To have change just to have it isn�t a reason at all.
Don�t follow tradition because it is a tradition, and don�t participate in tradition when it worships the tradition and not the maker.
But even at that, you can�t avoid change. You are never the same as you were the day before.
You are different today than you were yesterday, and you will be more different tomorrow.
To avoid change is a false illusion that the world thrusts upon you.
They mistake mind set of remembrance as preservation.
The preservation of yesterday is as possible as the changing of tomorrow, today.
That is proof in itself that change is unavoidable, for there is a tomorrow every day, so don�t dwell on change.
Do not worry about tomorrow because tomorrow can worry about itself.
But even with worry, how can you change tomorrow?
Just as the same as you can�t go back to yesterday.
Don�t be worried with change. What came to anyone who worried?
To be involved with such a thing is foolishness.
You can�t avoid change or change change by worry.
Just the same, it is foolish to spend life obsessed with death.
It is never a good thing to be obsessed with anything, but if people think they can stop change, then no one can really tell them different.
To change someone�s mind about something they believe in whole-heartedly is not an easy thing to do,
Just the same as to tell someone who is patriotic that the system doesn�t work.
If someone wants to listen, they will; otherwise, that�s their problem.
But to finally reach that one person and change him is a reward all its own,
To find the one whom no one loves and help him to his feet.
Lead him down the righteous path and keep him from ever getting lost.
To find and help the one who always got walked on in the past.
Establish a faith in life and begin to have love that will last.
To lend a hand to him who needs it and relieve it without a doubt.
To restrain the pain and hold back the blood as he bleeds from inside out.
When that one person never good enough to live through the next day.
To go through life not knowing if someone really does care.
All they need is a few distractions to get their minds off the pain,
And when their heart is empty and weightless, they an still be content
In the arms of a lover.
When they seek comfort in the eyes of that person, they melt in love.
And when there, do they not get tired of the norm?
No way to get away from the iniquities of life, always stranded, even with love.
For the lover doesn�t understand the extreme pain and torment their partner goes through every morning to get out of rest just to try to begin to see the world as everyone else.
To rise to the occasion as they put their bodies through pain a torture; to live what most see as a normal daily routine.
As their life diminishes and deteriorates in front of those who don�t even notice, life still twists around them.
But in the sweet madness of their lives, they live for the little joys.
What can one say when another offers him them the world on a silver platter?
Almost any man would feel guilty for accepting such drastic offerings.
But if you turn them down, what becomes of the other persons ego?
Will they think thee other is not thankful of that they didn�t spend enough money on the gift?
To give into such guilty pleasures is this is easy, but to hold back and be modest is the real challenge.
To relieve yourself of such earthly possessions is the key.
Not to relinquish everything of yours, but to just not see possessions as of more importance than they really should be.
Things owned should be owned they should not own you.
Objects are just that, objects.
It�s not right to see objects as important as other things, such as people.
For can you rightfully own a person?
Can you justly put a price on someone?
If you say yes, then you are foolish person.
Has life taught you nothing?
Does your life mean more than any other?
I thinkist not!
For if someone is more important than someone else, then who is to say that there isn�t someone more important than you?
To speak of your mind is to be your own person and not let anyone try to own you or make you think that they are better.
For they may be evil for making you think that, but you are the fool for believing them.
But belief is only what you make it.
What you believe is your own choice.
If you see it, it must be real, right?
But if that is true, then what you believe depends on what your mind allows you to know.
To see something and think that it is real is only a mindset.
If someone thinks that their arm is on fire then they are going to run around in panic and scream at random.
The mind is a horrible thing to mistake.
Something to take advantage of.
To see what someone thinks is almost scary.
The thoughts, obsessions, traits and fetishes.
To see someone�s thoughts such as these are frightening.
To see what they see; to hear what they hear; to be what they are.
But to be you and do god works due to someone else, now that is astonishing.
To live in someone else�s name.
To bleed for someone else.
To do everything in their name and praise them for everything you claim they have done for you.
Your soul devoted to an inner being that you can not see nor taste nor touch or stabilize with any other senses, but your heart and soul screams at you them reality of it.
To hear the blood run through your veins and run into the oxygen as you feel that the only substitute for what your soul screams for is the one thing that makes your body scream.
You never stop crying.
The tears never really stop coming out.
May you be crying from the inside or out?
Weather the tears build up on the inside or the outside, they still build up, and down your hope.
You seem to have nothing going for you and you see no reason to keep going.
But you continue to press on forward for some unknown reason.
Your inner being pushes your limits and tests your abilities.
To be the puppet of something who knows what they are doing.
And while you cry from the inside out, and the blood falls like tears from your torn flesh, you realize what a mistake that you have made.
You life seems no longer important and you see no need to continue living it.
And as your life does go on you wish you could have a change of venue.
You want to be yourself and not someone else.
They live the way they live and they die how they die.
My life is the way it is and I have my reasons for why I cry.
They are how they are and I am the way I am.
They walk the way they walk and I stand the way I stand.
But to live for that one person in his house and to say things in his name.
Read the books.
Live for what you believe.
For if you don�t study it and believe it then you are as good as those who curse it.
Not caring is as good as contradicting it.
Live the time.
For without something to believe in, then what shall believe in you?
Who shall live and/or die for you?
Without faith or belief then what do you have?
Life for life?
Then death for what?
Death then for nothing.
As you walk the glass filled road.
And stumble on the speed bumps of distress.
Then you realize, when you cut yourself on the barbed wire of fear, that you will die in vain if this continues.
So, did he.
Or did he? NO!
He didn�t die in vain.
Yet they all called him bad.
He died for good, yet his life was harder than that of one who didn�t die for anything or believe in anything.
As He ran across the Death Valleys and down the steep rocky hills over the acid water ponds, He never went wrong.
Perfect.
So too never be wrong.
But even He died for what He believed in.
So that we may have something to hold dear to our hearts when no one else will.
But even He is taken in vain.
He died for us and some laugh at the thought of Him.
And then, like so many others, we take Him for granted.
We complain as hypocrites.
But as we complain, His love still manifests for us.
He still has the drive to come again.
And for us as people to be saved.
Saved from the world we live in.
Even as a teenager, the struggles of life still stare me in the eye.
For the fear of becoming a stereotypical teenager.
But when you try to be different you become a poser.
So be different by being you self.
And then what?
Then you live to be different only to have someone else try to make you all the same.
To have them try to make you life like theirs, and then when they realize that they have no hope what so ever, they just quit, and give up on you.
To have the day of your memorous birth be forgotten by the ones who you thought loved you.
You cry, but no tears are allowed to come out on a day such as this.
But even at this, you live through your day and see that they are not even important and don�t mater.
To cry tears of pain is useless because it gives that person the satisfaction of hurting you.
Don�t hide your feelings but also, don't let your feelings be changed by those who don�t care you.
Also, don�t be afraid of being hurt.
Take chances.
Make mistakes.
But don't get too messy.
Don't cower in fear of hurt or pain.
You can't spend your life obsessed with death.
Don�t let other people hurt you.
Not that you should be over protective and crazy, but don't let other people's negativity effect you.
Your judgement on anything should be your thoughts, not the thoughts of others.
Live you life by your rules and don't try live by someone else's.
Live for what you believe in and die for it as well.
For isn't it better to die for something than to die for nothing?
And, if isn't worth dying for, then it isn't worth living for.
Even that one person.
That one person who is always there for you.
They always see you through everything.
They never leave your side.
The one person who turns every tragedy into a melancholy joke and, as laughter spurts from your heart and mouth, you hope that those time never come to an end.
But what happens when they do?
What happens when the people that you love receive a change in their life that makes them not the person that you fell in love with?
They have this stereotypical teenage charm that wasn�t there when you "use to"      know them.
They hand you all their problems without knowing, and you, being the helpful person you are, try to solve their problems, and then you end up getting hurt.
But how do we end the torment?
How do you solve the problems with your loved ones and not lose them?
How do you tell the person that you tell everything to that they are not then same people?
They�ve lost themselves.
Who are they now?
Do you really know them anymore?
Now they have this stereotypical teenage attitude towards life.
They either don�t care or put too much thought into every little detail and meticulous pondering.
Their lives or either too happy or always sad.
Why cant they just be in the gray area?
If teenagers are suppose to be confused and depressed all the time and have all of these hormones that block their understanding, then why do I feel this way all the time?
Children's lives are hard enough; they don't need to be made more difficult by other children with the same feats.
But why do I have to be so grown-up?
Why cant I be one of those imbecilic people who are completely oblivious to the life and world that surrounds them and all the problems that they face but don�t really know?
To be one of those people who see the world as something that can be an asset to the but they don�t want to help anyone else.
To be perfectly happy with being blind to the corruption and destruction in the world.
Why do I have to see?
Why do I have to know?
Why can�t I be foolish?
For there is no such thing as absolutely sure, and the foolish have no fear of being wrong.
For they do not see that the world is composed of violence and trash.
They don�t see the bad people.
Their life has been "perfect".
They don�t see the red!
They can�t see the norm.
Their interior is hollow and their reality is paper-thin.
Their real lives are something that they will soon will discover as fake.
But they don�t see it, and they get use to being "normal".
And when they find who they really are, they are afraid of the truth.
They are not themselves.
They are everyone else.
They try to be everyone else.
They are, what you call, the system.
A single working body composed of everyone else who feels that they need to be like everyone else.