Good morning I suppose, well for another 2 minutes that is. Well I spend the first night back at my parents house. Belive it or not I actually slept good. A few reasons 1) The room is pitch black at night, 2)It's really quiet, 3) I was tired from all the moving and 4) I was tired b/c I was emotional. Yeah yesterday was hard. There were so many times I almost broke down and cried. I mean I didn't want to move. I didn't even start packing until Wednesday and I did a bunch of packing last night before I actually moved. I think everybody knew that I was upset and they helped make me feel better. Thanks guys! Shane thank you for actually showing up and helping me, I always know I can count on you. Grant thank you also for coming later and for staying with me and helping me feel better. Oi, I have sooo much work to do today :p. I mean I've still got a bunch of crap at April's house. And I have cleaning to do over there. I think it might take me a while still. Today mom and I are going to move all of her stuff and probaly arrange things downstairs. I can't really unpack until things are all put into their place. Grant and I put my movies away last night. Today I started tackling Sock Everst. But I need to bring the rest of my odd socks from April's place. I've also decided to sort through all my boxes b/c some are half empty, somethings I can probably throw out and somethings I just need to reorganize. Well the call of mom saying it's time to go grocery shopping is calling me so I'm outie.

April 22, 2005

So when it all comes down to it, I get to keep Weaver!! I was getting kinda worried about it. But dad said I could bring him over, sure there are some tough rules but I think I can manage them. :D I don't want to think of how I would have reacted if he wasn't allowed to come, Kleenex city!! I mean I started crying just thinking about him not being with me. He's my baby!!

So today is Grant and mine's One Month. Last night at about like 12:10 I got a text message from Cody wishing me a Happy One Month. It was sweet Thanks hun. Were watching Sponge Bob tonight, I'm gonna make him. lol. It's funny b/c the kids that I babysit told me I should dump him if he doesn't like Sponge Bob. And Spencer was sorta being serious. So I'm gonna get Grant to watch some of the eposides that way when he comes with me again we can all watch the movie. (which for the record Shane and I both saw, their both your man cards are revoked :P) On a side note I think Shane's man card has been revoked permanantly, which is why I like him so much! B/C he's not a typical guy! He is himself and that is awesome!!

So last night was Mikey's birthday. Happy Birthday Mikey!! We all went to my parents house for the party. It was fun, we ended up watch CSI. Then everybody left at like between 10 and 10:30. Oi, where are all the night owls? That's okay, it gave me a great chance to do some reading. Oi, I read from like 11:00 till 1:20. And I only stopped b/c I couldn't keep my eyes open. So it was a good night, and today Grant's coming over after my work. (oi, I work until 9:00, :p, oh well) Well this is Ground control to major...

April 19, 2005

Feeling better, not depressed anymore, I managed to nip it in the but. Now I just feel busy!! It's like even if I wanted to stay home by myself for a night I can't lol!! So yeah moving in a short time, I really need to start packing!! Oh gosh do I ever!! Seeing as I have today off I think I'll pack and move some stuff over today. Had a good weekend if a bit unusual. On Saturday I went to Kelly's with Grant and Siegi. It was fun, we had a celebration supper for my school and Siegi's new job. We had KFC and then we just hung out. It was fun. I really enjoyed hanging out with Kelly twice in one week, I miss her. It's almost like the dynamics have changed a bit since I started dating Grant, but it's a good thing. Then on Sunday Grant came over to for lunch. I bbq'd Eden sasuage!! Oh yummy!! I love those soo much! *starts drooling just thinking about them* Anyways so afterwards we went back to Grant's house. I drove Charlene home and Grant and I went out for dinner afterwards. Gosh we both realized that we went out more, and spend more time alone when we weren't dating. That's funny. Then we went back to Grant's house and we played Rebound (I beat him, twice) then we all decided to play Euchre. Hmmm, me and Grant, against Johnny and Rod. Yeah. Then I went home later that night and was slighty weirded out. Not totally sure. *off topic, whoo hoo Black Eyed Peas is playing!!!* But I'm defaintly feeling better inside of me, my "normal statis" is peaceful again. The smile is back on my lips. You've got to learn that people can't affect how you feel. I find that alot of times somebody else will be having a bad day and will say something snarky and then I would get upset by it. I've realized that how they feel is irrelvant to how I feel. I mean I can feel for them but I shouldn't let their bad mood intergrate into how I feel. *off topic again "hey, must be the money"..*

So this is my week so far. Monday night was RAW at Brians. I picked Shane up at 7:20. And I might add that both Cody and Johnny called when I was having a shower. Why do people always call me when I'm having a shower? Anyways so I made supper and Shane ate his second supper lol. Then we bought these awesome slurpees!! I've never seen these containers before, there split in half so you can have two different flavours. Nifty eh? Anyways RAW was good. Hogan came back!! That was pretty sweet!! I love the Hulk! So does Cody, we were both very excited!

Then today is Tuesday and I am off work but I need to do laundry and pack and stuff like that. :p No fun. Then I have youth tonight. That'll be good. Tomorrow is Wednesday so we have TUG and then Michelle and I are going out. Then it's Thursday and it's Mikey's birthday so were having a birthday celebration and then I'm meeting Marjorie aroudn 9:15 ish to hang out with her b/c I haven't seen her in forever. Then I work till 9 Friday night and it's Grant and mine's one month. Can you belive it? Then I'm pretty sure Kelly wants to hang out this weekend. And Johnny wants to continue our game so that'll have to fit in sometime this weekend as well. The only problem is trying to fit all of us together? Why was it so much easier when we weren't playing this game to get together? Lol. So yup, once again Robin is very busy. But I don't mind. So peace out homeboys and homegirls. (couldn't resist :D lol)

April 15, 2005

Yes I know it's been a while in coming but I've been having a rough time. Unfortunatly I think I'm coming down with a case of the depression. I kinda always get depressed this time of year. But I'm fighting it tooth and nail but it's hard. When I sit by myself at home I just feel like crap. Why can't I do anything right? That's what I feel like. I guess I'm just overwhelemed. I have fixed so many problems in my life and that's awesome. But I told God that I wanted to do kinda an overhaul of me. And somedays I get upset b/c there's sooo much about me that needs to change. The latest thing is my tounge. I need to stop swearing so much, to think before I speak and be less sarcastic and hurt people's feelings. Somedays I can't do anything right and I get frustrated and upset. But then I sit back and realize that I have absolutely no good reason nor justification to be upset and then I feel even worse. I guess that's why I don't really want to talk about it. I want to be the kinda person that is steady and the kinda person that people admire b/c nothing gets her down. So when I get down I feel bad about it b/c then I'm not really relying on God so I keep it inside of me. To whom do I vent you might ask? Well I've kinda got a few people but when I do talk about things I talk in circles and I don't make sense and it's frustrating and confusing for me as well. To be honest I don't know what's wrong. Now don't get me wrong, I am joyful and happy and peaceful. Just the past few weeks I've been more melancholoy and that's not really who I am. Maybe the money thing is getting me down, perhaps. But things are working out for that. I mean God has answered some of my prayers. I have great friends, great family, an amazing boyfriend. I've been doing my devotions for 29 days straight now!! (that's awesome for me!!) I've been praying more then I ever have. So the only conculsion I can come to is that I'm getting depressed and I can't understand why. It could be seasonal, I do tend to get more down this time of year. (think summer clothes and what not :p) But I will be praying against this and I would appricate any prayers offered up on my behalf.

So Vicky (my car) is offically mine!!! My name is now on the owership! Dad and I went to the licence bureau yesterday and got it switched over. And it only cost me $10 b/c you can now switch plates from parent to child so I saved on buying new plates!! Sweet deal eh?! I tried to find new insurance but none were cheaper so I'm probably gonna stick with who I have right now. Oh well you can't win them all. She's all fixed too. The second time around at the mechanics was just a transmission line leak, it only cost me $63 and it only took a few hours so that was an answer to prayer as well. Hopefully my car will behave herself for a while now!!

My week has been crazy, it seems like I'm booked up solid for the next while. I mean I love it and it's fun it's just busy. I'm actually finding myself enjoying some alone time, but only once in a while. ;) Well I should be going, gotta get ready for bed, I'm tired. I was babysitting tonight and they set up their trampline and oi, the kids had to have me bounce them and play games so *yawn* *stretch* I'm tired. G'night!

April 8, 2005

Okay, so this is what is new. I'm defaintly moving back home. In May. It's for the best. My car is currently at the mechanics, she has a bad transmission leak. Hopefully it won't cost to much... But all in all I'm feeling much better. I had people praying for me yesterday and it helped. And even just being around supportive and encouraging people helped me feel better. I know things will get better, it's just a matter of waiting them out.

So Siegi got a new job!! I'm so excited for him!! He deserves the best. I care about both of them soo much!!

So I got into school!!! I was accepted!!! I'm going to start in September! Whoo hoo!! I'm really excited about it. I'm going in for EA (Education Assistant). It'll be at the Welland campus. Once again I lack the time to write a long entry so this will be all for today. But peace out love ya'll!

April 6, 2005

Well it's been a while since I've written but I really haven't had much access to the internet. I got a new computer but it's not hooked up to the network at my place so yadda yadda yadda. So I'm currently at my mom's. I'm actually spending the night for 2 reasons, #1 my place REEKS b/c it got some work done to it and it smells like paint and what not. and #2 Mom is taking me into work early tomorrow and it's just easier if I'm here. Now you might ask "why is your mom taking you into work". Well my cars messed up again. So yeah, can't drive it. I'm at my breaking point. I feel like I'm drowning. I'm kinda drowning in a sea of debt. I'm seriously condsidering moving back home. It saves me the most money and it wouldn't be too bad. It wouldn't be for to long either. Anyways yeah, I'm kinda upset right now so I'm gonna sign out.