//I hear you talking a lot of similarities//your choice of words and all the fantasies//
When I woke up around 6pm, I noticed the other side of the bed neatly tucked back and vacant- a sign that Taylor had woken before me and decided to leave. Rolling onto my back I spread out in the bed, sighing contently as I shut my eyes, still feeling his lips on mine and his warm hands on my stomach, his fingers stroking and swirling around my tanned skin as if they were expert roads that he travelled everyday. Just as I stretch in satisfaction that my little nap had caused me to feel at ease, the phone rung on my nightstand louder than I cared to hear.
Hello?
Get yourself ready, I�m taking you out for a drink,�
Taylor�s voice sounded rushed as I heard the banging of the floorboards at his end, as the mental picture of him jumping into his jeans with the phone tucked under his chin and pressed against his shoulder infiltrated my mind. Laughing a little I sat up in bed and replied.�Why? You could have just asked me earlier you know�
�But earlier I didn�t have a younger brother hitting me up for a lift to Caffrey�s on the outskirts and I don�t fancy making two trips and I don�t want to sit ad have a drink on my own and I thought you might like to go out, you�ve only been to work and the store since Hyde left-don�t worry I don�t mean like a date �date�, I just thought you�d like to��
�No, your right I haven�t been out- what time?
I now found myself sat in the passenger seat of Taylor�s latest car purchase, (a deep green Audi sport) sinking into the leather interior whilst Zac tapped on his knee like that annoying adolescent he reminded me he was. Taylor had only shot me a welcoming grin since I�d got in the car, but as we pulled into Caffery�s parking lot, I felt attitudes change. �Come and find me at 10 Zac, and if your reeking of booze when you come back, don�t think your getting a lift with me,� I put my hand over my mouth, trying not to laugh at the big brother speech that had Zac pulling faces at him behind his back, before throwing him a mumbled �yeah yeah� and stumbling out the car clumsily. Sitting there whilst Taylor shut down the engine and shoved his wallet in his jacket pocket, I suddenly felt very out of place-like I shouldn�t be here, like I didn�t belong. �So you want to get a drink or go to the diner down he road and get food?� he asked politely as he turned to me, pulling of my seatbelt. Biting my lip I shrugged my shoulders, trying to conceal my fear of being out without really knowing why I was here. The thought had crossed my mind that it was a friendly drink at the local bar that had shaken my thoughts about things with Taylor before; it had fuelled the first proper sexual encounter between us the night before. �You know what Taylor, I really don�t feel like anything,� Okay give me one good reason why I just said that. Exactly, I don�t have one.
She was a little too quiet on the ride over here, distantly looking out of the window at the highway she�d seen a thousand times before. Now Zac had bounded out of the car she had no excuse to stay quiet, she could start to loosen up a bit, but I only notice her clam up more. �You didn�t have to come Alba if you didn�t want to, I just thought you could do with the trip out,� I commented unthreateningly as she looked very apologetic, running her hand through her hair whilst her other hand tugged at the hem of her thin jumper top. �No Taylor, it was a nice though I just think�� she paused, looking at me sweetly, her lips trying to tug in a smile to try and assure me that she was okay and that it was just a glitch inside of her that was preventing her from taking a time out. �If it�s me or you think this seems wrong, just tell me, I really won�t be offended,� She immediately looked away from me and hid her face in her hands as soon as the words left my mouth and I couldn�t help but get a horrible feeling washing over me, way over my head where I couldn�t reach it. Maybe Isaac was right, she was on the re-bound and now as she sat here in the car, unable to even get out, let alone have a drink with me, maybe she was regretting the kisses and the embraces and it was just now starting to eat at her enough to make excuses not to see me. �It�s about Hyde isn�t it?� I queried, raising my eyebrows as she shook her head, breathing in deeply as if she were at a Lamar�s. Her suspended silence almost answered my question until I felt her hand cover my own, resting on my thigh. Looking down at the gesture and then to her I found her shaking her head once again. �This isn�t about Hyde; it�s about you and me. I want to be here, I so honestly do but then when I think about it Taylor I don�t know where I am. Weather I�m seeking my solace in you, on the rebound, or weather there�s something else to all this, I�m not confused I�m just trying to take it as it comes but unfortunately it�s all got knotted and now I have no idea what�s going on and what my head is trying to tell me,� she gripped my hand a little more as I rested my head against the seat trying to understand her as more of the conversation with Isaac came back at me. We both think there�s something else to this- that�s good enough for me.
�I don�t mind taking you back, it�s really not a problem, I�ll give Zac the money for a cab, I really can�t be bothered to come back again and fetch his sorry drunken ass,� I chuckled as she looked at me with a laughing smile as I opened the car door a little. �Stay here, I�ll go find him and then I�ll take you home,� I ordered as I let my hand fall out of her grip as I stepped out of the car. �Taylor?� she called just before I shut the door.
�Yeah,�
�Will you come back with me tonight?
I wasn�t quite sure in myself what I�d meant by asking him back-he�d almost spent the entire day with me, talking, sleeping and the odd other thing, but it felt good to say to him that I knew there was more to this that perhaps what he thought was the usual, �get over the ex� rebound kiss. It had to be; I wouldn�t do that to myself, not with Taylor, not with our past. But the more I think about it, I realize how much of him I like, what I want to see more of- perhaps I�m just growing accustomed to the real him, there�s no falsifying him right now, perhaps because he�s grown up, or perhaps because he knew before me this was more than a rebound. Sounds stupid to say that now in a way, he�s gone from being the jackass that only knew how to break me, to being the comforter who knew how to put me back together again.
�Why have you asked me back Alba?� he asked curiously as he pulled his coat off and placed it over the back of a kitchen chair as I rifled through the cupboards to find some edible food. �I thought we could get a pay per view to make up for not going for a drink,� I replied, my head halfway stuck in the cupboard, reaching for a new box of Oreo�s. I stood on tip toes trying to reach them until I felt Taylor�s hands on my waist, pulling me down and turning me to face him. Our close proximity didn�t seem to scare me much this time as I looked at him truthfully. �Because I want you here stupid, I hear there�s a sex in the city marathon on HBO if that appeals more,� I playfully replied, his hands still gripping my hips as he looked at me up and down innocently. His response never came for he pulled me too him and once again, engulfed my lips once more, the sweet taste of cinnamon gum strong on his lips and his tongue as I accepted the advance, clasping my arms around his neck as I reached up to keep our lips locked together. He pulled away slowly and looked at me, not breaking our embrace this time and this time braving to say something. �Now what?� he smiled slowly as I licked my lips and savoured the cinnamon taste. �I�m sick of you asking questions,� I teased as I pulled him back in for another kiss, walking backwards towards the kitchen door, reaching for the light switch as we exited. As we pulled apart at the bottom of the stairs he looked at me with a worried expression as I decided it was perhaps time to give myself some quite self-assurance. �You have two choices, you can leave now and we�ll continue our paths as friends, or you can be willing to try, like me, to find out what that little bit of something else is that�s been hanging between us like a donkey�s carrot,� My tone was light but deadly serious as I made it clear to him the options that were swimming around in my head. I knew that the voice of conscience would be as strong in his head as it was mine, because this time it�s totally different I noticed his blue eyes brighten as he took my hand and started walking with me through the living room, his other hand grappling for mine as he pulled me forward and out onto the deck slowly and carefully as I looked at him in bemusement.
As soon as he shut the patio doors behind us he pulled me close to him once again, surrounding me in his arms as I felt the echo of his heart once again setting rhythm to my own. I was sick of the waiting, I was ready to find out so I put my hand behind his head and forcefully kissed him, encouraging him into it as I felt his hands travel up and under my top, his palm flattening and gliding over my stomach as he reached my breasts, smoothing his hand over each one, letting his fingers trail behind, numbing the nipples in a delightfully pleasing way. Our main kiss had broken and he was now sucking at the tender skin just underneath my ear, adding more fuel to the fire. I started to carefully un button the bottom of his navy blue shirt, letting my fingers graze over his navel and the small trail of fine hair that dipped down below his boxers, already something different from the last meaningless times. He was pushing my top up and over my breasts, pushing the loose fitting t-shirt bra up with it before drawing it over my head and throwing it down beside us in victory. I slipped my knee between his legs, parting them gently as he covered my hands, helping me to unbutton his shirt, his eyes locking with mine shortly before he went back to kissing my neck and collarbone as I pushed the shirt over his hips and down his arms, making sure my hands grazed his fevering skin to add more pleasure to his growing arousal. �If you don�t want this your going to have to stop me now,� he whispered raggedly as he licked and nipped at my nipple, sucking tenderly at the surrounding skin as I fumbled with the large buckle on his typically southern brown belt. �I�m not going to stop you Taylor, not when it�s unfolding like this,� I panted back as he came back up to standing as he let me finish on the belt before I opened the top button of his black jeans. He let his fingers pull at the cotton ties of my white parachute trousers letting them billow round my feet almost as soon as the knot was released as he looked at me with eyes that were cautious yet satisfied as I pulled down his jeans in one sharp tug.
He pushed me back a few steps to stand up against the wall as he pressed his erection up against me, his hands resting against the wall just above my head as hi ran both his hands, palm side down over my breasts, down my stomach and round and up my sides, pushing my arms up above my head as he caressed the skin right up to the tips of my fingers. I closed my eyes and smiled when I dropped one hand to hold the back of his head as we shared a fleeting kiss before his hands returned to my hips. �It should have been like this from the start,� I hushed as I let my hand cover the hardening member pressing it's self against me urgently. �Just concentrate on now,� he replied as his fingers made short work of discarding my panties down at my feet and my fingers eagerly did away with the wispy white fabric of his boxer shorts. My hand smoothed over his shaft, causing him to flinch a little at the sudden sensation as I slowly moved it up and down. �Keep that up and my legs will give out,� he joked lightly as his eyes closed and I continued the sensual movement causing him to put a hand on the wall for balance. When his eyes flew open I looked at his hazy expression, giddy with pleasure as he took my hand away and led me down to lay on the deck. Laying on his side his kissed my neck to start with, forming a wet trail down my body, between my breasts dipping into my navel before he reached my hot spot. I put my hands on his shoulders as I felt my body go numb and weak at the spiritually shocking attack he was performing on me. �Ugh, I�m feeling so dizzy,� I chuckled as he softly blew on the scolding skin he�d whipped up into frenzy. �Do you want me to stop?� his head snapped up in concern as he crawled back up my body, our skin fusing with the sheer heat between us. He was looking me square in the eyes with genuine concern, his body shaking a little in anticipation. I pushed the fringe out of his eyes and let my hand rest once again on his shoulder, lightly pressing the pads of my fingers grippingly. �No,� I whispered with a small smile as I smoothed my hand down his back, dipping when it came to the small, as I started to guide him into me slowly, as I let the unfamiliar feeling wash over me as I pushed the past feelings of our intercourse into a very deep pit at the back of my mind. He didn�t move for a while, he just stayed there, as the sound of the wind picked up in the garden, thrashing against the trees and our breathing regulated as best it could before he started moving slowly, in and out, caressing my aching insides in such a different way to any he had before. It was slow it was meaningful it was everything I had pushed myself to think about before when the idea of a sensual union had entered my head. He was moaning softly in my ear, occasionally placing shaky flutter kiss on the hollow of my neck, sucking lightly whenever the moment would let him. �I�m so close,� he shuddered, pulling up a little, placing his weight on his arms as he pressed against the deck, pushing in and out as my hips pushed up to meet him. I didn�t have time to reply as I felt myself fall down, holding him in as he collapsed down on top of me, writhing in sexual satisfaction, his head nestled against my breasts. Fanning my fingers through his hair as I looked up at the wooden timbers of the deck roof I smiled to myself knowing I�d managed to let myself get involved and not get broken. I�d managed to let myself abandon questions and confusion and learn from experiencing things and now I knew for sure that it was more of an uncertain feeling, an unknown reason why I wanted to be with him like this, tonight, letting him be close to me again in a way that really matter-instead of me being on the re-bound. Hyde was nowhere in my thoughts because as he looked up at me, spent and satisfied I knew this time he wasn�t going to get up, get his clothes on and leave to sneak up the stairs to his bedroom in the early hours. This time it was different and I wasn�t itching to find out why, just as long as he didn�t leave tonight, I know that I didn�t make a mistake in giving Taylor another chance, to be my friend and to be a comforter and now- now he�s something more than that, something I can�t quite name, but there�s no rush to find out because we both now are thinking the same thing, talking the same talk even if were not sure what it is yet.