I watched her stand a little away from me, her legs in a wide stance as released the crushing grip on my shoulder, my hand soon flying to sooth the burning pain through the fabric of my shirt. I looked at her examining her nails before dropping her hands to her sides, her stare blinding as I tried to find courage enough to say something. �I�.� I didn�t get past a small whimper for a hard slap echoed through the room, stinging my jaw, throwing my head to the side as my eyes shut tight trying to help swallow the pain. �Shut up,� she spat hoarsely as I rubbed my jaw, turning to look back up at her deathly stare. I literally wanted to wet myself, I don�t think I�d ever been more worried about someone�s actions than I was right now. I felt her moving a little towards me as she started to lean in to kiss me again, her lips running over the swollen hollow of my bottom lip, still sore and bleeding her teeth tugging a little more as she roughly thrust her tongue against mine, ordering me silently to respond. My eyes clenched shut I started to let myself respond to her as her hands ran through my hair pulling it slightly, tugging the sensitive hair at the back of my neck causing me to rip out of the kiss a little, sucking in breath at the shocked pain she was inflicting. I wasn�t allowed to stop for long as her hands yanked my hair sharply, thrusting my lips back to hers as she started to run her nails down the sides of my face, running over the stinging skin and the rough skin of previous slaps, pinching slightly as she pulled away from me. Her hand snaked round again to the back of my neck as she smiled tauntingly at me before pulling my head back violently, snapping it back causing me to gasp loudly.
I so desperately wanted to say something but as I felt the hold on my hair get stronger, my neck coursing throbbing pain down my spine I knew I was being silenced. She started to use her free hand to un-button my shirt my mouth now slightly open as I struggled for air, gulping it down like madness. When she finished unbuttoning my shirt she let go of my hair, hitting my head away from her as she turned to be in front of me again, grasping my shoulders like crabs pinchers as the literally tore the shirt away from my body, my mouth now totally paralysed at what she could possibly do next. �Uh,� I mumbled as I grimaced swallowing, the soreness of my throat adding to my tally of pain and fear. But as soon as the vocal sound left my mouth I felt a slap striking across the other side of my face, knocking me off again, dizziness forming in my head. I felt her lips on my neck and her nails pressing against my skin as she trailed her tongue down her fingers scratching my skin, piercing it, burning a trail of satanic pain. She reached my stomach and promptly bit my skin causing me to try and reach for her hands to pull her away from me. �Get off me,� I tried to yell, coughing uncontrollable when she pounced on me, pinning me to the bed, her hands grasping my wrists above my head, her thumbs pressing against the tender nerves of my wrist causing my hands to start numbing. She leaned down to my ear, promptly sucking it before hissing torturously. �Don�t try it, I�ve lost my patience with you always breathing down my neck,� her words shocked me, draining the color from my face as she started sucking again at my neck her fingers racking up and down my chest. I felt like I was on a cliff edge and she was pushing me to jump, I felt my heart dying with every pang of pain she inflicts.
After receiving another slap for trying to keep her from biting me I decided I had to get away from her, that I couldn�t let her do this to me. I lifted my legs up round her, kicking her off my body, pushing myself up from the bed whilst she tried to pick herself up giddily. I�d only made it over to the door before she had gotten up and grabbed me by the waist, throwing me back up against the door roughly, her hands hitting me over my bare chest and my face, yelling for being so stupid. She hit my head back against the door causing dizzy spells inside of me, making me feel faint as I felt her tugging at the belt on my trousers. As soon as I realized what she was doing my hands covered hers trying to force her away from me, her legs trying to kick my shins as I pushed her backwards, still fighting her hands as I backed her against the wall, her side knocking the chest of draws causing a few things to fall off the side and onto the floor. �Isaac you said you wanted me to love you, what�s with the hostility?� she grunted as she fought against me, one hand reaching out to attack my face, scratching down my nose and over my eyes, causing alarming discomfort when she caught my eye. It was enough for me to let go of her hands to cover my face, rubbing my eye, trying to open it. But it was no good, she was back trying at my trousers and this time she succeeded after having disabled me. �I don�t want this! I don�t want this Tea!� I cried as she pushed me back onto the bed, causing me to stumble over backwards after catching the heal of one of her discarded shoes. �Tough shit,� was all she spat as she struggled with me again as she pulled my trousers away from me, her hands grabbing for my boxers as I leaned up to push her away onto the floor, landing on her butt with a satisfying thud.
As I tried to stand again she grabbed the waistband of my boxers, pulling me back from her position on the floor, getting herself back on her feet as she shoved me back towards the wall, my body crushing against the nightstand, the lamp falling to the floor and shattering as she held a hand round my neck. �Just shut up and take it like a man,� she growled as she pulled my boxers down fully, her eyes smiling devilishly as she licked her lips looking straight at my pained expression. �Please, don�t do this,� I begged, the tears wetting my cheeks gradually as she pressed her hand to my neck tighter as she lifted her skirt around her hips to reveal her naked lower half, my eyes gaping in fear as my heart race increased ten-fold. �Oh Isaac, I only do these things because I love you and I know how much you�ve missed this,� she chuckled in my ear as I just stood there, naked and powerless, every breath hurting and every move she made trampling all over my love, my heart, my life and everything else that I thought I stood for.
�Oh yeah this is love,� she finished before ramming herself on top of me brutally, her hand not moving from my neck as I cried out in pain from the searing heat tearing through out my body, the splitting pain from my groin causing me to cry and snivel like a baby as she thrust herself against me time and time again, my constant pleas for her to stop only caused her to bang against me harder and harder, my hips becoming tender and bruised as I felt her lips on mine, nipping and toughing, her grip tightening on me when I refused to respond, pursing my lips together and clenching my eyes shut as I cried out in anguish and crippling pain. �STOP!� I called as she moaned loud and louder my legs about to give way at any moment as I felt disgust and shame fill my body, the numbing in my legs rising up to my stomach as I approached a most unwanted climax. �Is this what you�ve been waiting for, is this what you�ve been trying to act so concerned about me for? A good, hard, fuck-is that right?� she panted pounding her body against mine as she punctuated each word towards the end of the sentence. I called out in pain, my eyes rolling to the back of my head as she pulled my hair, clenching it in her fist as she bucked her hips ferociously one last time before she fell against me, pinning me with her whole body against me as I tried to draw breath.
As soon as she stopped her loud panting she removed her hand from my neck and pushed against my shoulders as she slipped away from me causing me to slide down the wall in pain, exhaustion, fear, terror and most of all- disgrace. I watched her shake her skirt down over her hips and reach for her shoes, slipping them on as I just sat there, shaking uncontrollably, trembling all over as I wrapped my arms round my ice cold body, watching her through sore eyes, my sobs being muffled by my arms, my whole body feeling battered and bruised and totally broken, inside and out. I watched her run a brush through her hair before she turned to me briefly. �Happy now?� she asked rudely before brushing past me, leaving the room, slamming the door behind her causing the pictures on the walls to shake as I waited for the front door to slam with the same first. When it slammed satisfactorily I looked round the wreckage of the room before curling up on my side, holding my knees to my chest as I just let my broken heart pour out through my sobs of disillusionment.
Why did that just happen to me? I�I don�t know what�s going on anymore, I hurt so much all over, I don�t even think I can get up right now. Had I just been raped by my own girlfriend, had I just been humiliated, violated and used then made to feel like it�s all my fault for being concerned and showing her love? Someone come and find me, I can�t get out of this place I�ve been pushed into.
Zac�s words floated round in my head as I realized that it wasn�t just domestic violence and drug abuse, Tea had just raped me, a woman had just rapped a man- that can�t happen, not to me, I love her too much, and she loves me back. Oh god save me.