I Don't Know Either so Don't Ask
I've been thinking a lot about life and my past and where I'm going and I'm at one of those points where I feel like I'm falling. Not really going anywhere, but still moving. My shit job finally coming to an end at the end of the week and a chance to fix everything it fucked up.
My eyes have seriously been taking a pounding from the sun, wind (mostly because of the flying dirt), sheer amount of time I've been AWAKE with my contacts in my face, constantly being tired and not getting any writing done, the attack of the ticks, the farmers tan + raccoon eyes, the being tired making it impossible to do any exercise so I've gotten excessively fat�.this time breaking the 200 mark for the first time ever.
So my job sucks, but what's new right? I can handle it, but I don't wanna. Plus I won't be able too when college starts again in a week, so I handed in my notice�.good�..
I keep watching movies that have loving couples or beautiful women and it makes me sorta just sit back and think about the shit my love life�..lack of�..has become. Watch Love Actually and you'll see�.the scene where the best friend and the wife (Kiera Knightly) watch the wedding tape�.and he goes outside afterward�..I SO know that feeling and it sucks ass.
I try to be a good guy but it seems to get me nothing. Read my EDBD11 review and see how good a guy I really am��anyways�. I wouldn't say I'm depressed�..just kinda tired. That's really how I've always defined depression. But I really don't have much to be depressed about�..just sort of a lack of aim. It's hard to define.
I'm not really sure what this rant is about�..not even really sure what I wanted this rant to be about. So now I'm sitting here�.twirling my fingers in my beard�.listening to the Eagles "Lyin' Eyes" and wondering why the hell I'm even doing this.
Eventually when I get the copy, I'll scan the page that has my poems published on them and post them. Not for any particular reason�.mostly just cause I wanna. Anyhow�
I'll do a CotS for my next rant�..Mexican comedy shows and reality tv.
- The Butch Lesbian |
