Well, Jesus doesn't force himself into our lives, so I didn't want to be too pushy - it is counterproductive. So, I moved on to Eduwarda - she was ready. Four others in the group prayed the prayer and invited Jesus into their lives. Some read the prayer, others repeated the phrase after someone else had read it.
I came back to Camilo and said "I can't leave tonight, without asking one more time - 'Do you want to invite Jesus into your life?' He talked for a long time - much longer than a 'yes' or 'no' would have taken. Finally, I asked Juliana - "What is he saying?". I was ready to offer some answers to his objections. Instead, I was surprised. Juliana told me that he wanted to pray the prayer and he wanted to read it - but, he was afraid that someone would laugh at him.
I assured him that this was a serious matter between him and God - I would not laugh and would be very disappointed if anybody else did.
It was a moving moment - in his unsure moment, it would have been easy to let someone say a phrase and then for him to repeat it. That was not what he wanted, he wanted to read it himself - it was very touching.
On these visits, God is always with us. Sometimes, we feel His presence more than others. And I don't know what makes some visits more memorable than others - maybe it is the spiritial battle that has occurred in the days, weeks, months and years before we arrive. Some folks may have been rejecting God for decades - some folks just may have never heard a clear explanation of what God has done for us - some folks may have had some recent life-changing experiences - for whatever the reason, God's presense is always felt, but sometimes it is more overwhelming. This was a special visit, Camilo's prayer wasn't said with majestic oratory skills - instead it was read in quietness and humility, in awkward Portuguese and I was glad that God allowed me to be there.
It turns out that there was much more to Elane's statement than what initially appeared. When Juliana heard that there would be some North Americans coming to Sao Fidelis, she wanted to meet some of them. Later, she got to thinking about it and decided that might not be a good idea. When we were talking, I could tell that she was having difficulty finding a word - so, I suggested the word 'arrogant'. She nodded. At that time, her opinion was that North Americans were arrogant. However, her friend, Elane had been to the church and had gone on visits with us and had a different opinion.
Juliana could have come to the church to visit with us on Sunday, Monday or Tuesday - it took until Wednesday for her to show up. Why did she show up? I believe it was the encouragement of her friend - her encourager - her Barnabas - Elane. When we talked in July 2002, Juliana said "Elane said that you were cool."
Well, I have been described in several ways before. Sometimes with a positive description and sometimes in a negative description. Elane may have stretched the truth a little. I have been described as 'cold' - rarely 'cool'. Anyway, Juliana decided to come to church on Wednesday morning. Here is what I wrote in 1999: Elane's friend, Juliana, was at the church when we got there. She is studying English and wanted to talk to an American. She said that I was the first American that she had ever talked to. A little bit of a humbling experience - being recognized as the first to represent the US. It was a short visit - as I recall, I didn't say much - we just talked for a few minutes and then we had to go on some visits. Juliana went one way and I went the other. I didn't know if we would ever see each other again, at that time. We took a picture together and the photographer cut off the top of my head.
We had some good visits at the first of the week, Deborah did an excellent job - she always does. Then along came Wednesday - July 7, 1999. The first visit of the day was good - everything went well. What happened next is anybody's guess. Deborah and I still refer to it as THE VISIT. Here is my journal entry from 1999: Next, we went to a follow-up. The follow-up was to Neilveda's parent's house. He is the saxaphone player in the church. The mother and daughter had made decisions. This was the first follow-up and I was a little rusty. I made some mistakes and caused some frustration for Deborah, but we made it through. The wheels seemed to fall off when we were talking about the importance of following God's will. However, it is never good when the interpreter gets frustrated - basically, it was my fault because I should have done a better job of letting Deborah know what I planned to do and say during the visit.
I made an incorrect assumption during my conversation with Juliana. We were eating in the fellowship hall of the church, we were talking in the church and about church things - so, I assumed that Juliana was associated with a church. Here is my entry: Juliana was there and we visited some. I asked Juliana about church. I wasn't prepared for her answer. She said that she didn't go to chruch. I prayed for an opportunity to share the gospel with her. However, it was time for the next visit - there wasn't time. Fortunately, the next visit was just across the street from the church. I was pleasantly surprised when Juliana came along as a part of my team. We presented the gospel. Both the husband and wife made decisions. Juliana sat through the entire presentation and even helped with the reading of the scriptures. During the appeal, the team members were pointing towards Juliana, but I ignored them. I didn't want to embarrass her in front of the others. I didn't want her to feel any undue outside pressure. If she is going to invite Jesus into her life, then it must be her decision. The wife had prepared a snack, so we stayed and ate. It didn't matter that we had just eaten lunch - we ate again. We took a picture at the end and Juliana had a concerned look on her face. I didn't notice it at the time, but when I got my pictures developed after the trip - the worried look is very evident.
Remember that Deborah and I are still dealing with the frustration from THE VISIT. As we left the visit, the team was headed to the next visit. Deborah and the rest of the group was leading the way. Deborah was doing a great job - especially considering that she was still unsure of me. Since Juliana knows English, she and I stayed behind. I had a question for her.
"Juliana, what did you think of the presentation?" I can quote her answer exactly, "That was the most beautiful thing that I have ever heard." In my jouranal I wrote: It doesn't take a rocket scientist to know that next question needs to be "Do you want to invite Jesus into your heart?" She said 'yes', we were in front of the church so we just turned and headed inside. The group saw me and Deborah yelled "come on Britt - this way!" I replied "No, we are going in here." Juliana prayed and invited Jesus into her heart. We rejoiced a little before heading off to the next visit.
Deborah and I were still struggling with the effects of THE VISIT. I don't want to think about what would have happened if we had gotten so frustrated that we stopped working with each other. That has happened in the past with other teams, it didn't happen with us. I was the one with years of crusade experience, it was my responsibility to make sure that everything goes well and things weren't going well between Deborah and I. Victories were still being won, but the heart of the team - the interpreter-Texan relationship was suffering.
In 2002, in her testimony, Juliana explained that the presentation of the tract helped her to understand a lot of things. My 2002 journal entry of Juliana's testimony reads: Basically, she heard that some Americans were coming and she thought about going to see some of them. But, her idea of Americans was that they were arrogant. Elane asked if she wanted to meet me. Juliana said that Elane said that I was 'cool'. So, we visited and she went on an afternoon visit and it cleared up a lot of things for her. So, she was ready when I asked the question.
So, Satan could have won at several times. Juliana could have refused to visit with us because we were perceived to be arrogant. Deborah could have refused to work with me and rightfully so. Elane might not have been so persistent in inviting her friend to meet us. A bunch of issues - each one could have prevented someone from knowing Jesus.
Fortunately, the story doesn't end here. Remember that Deborah and I are still frustrated with each other. To set the stage, you need to know that Meriane has gone with me on several visits. She was one of the song leaders. A very active church member. She is pictured here with her parents:
I had the opportunity to go back to Sao Fidelis in 2000. Here is part of an entry from that journal: I found out that Meriane was attending missionary school. Last year, during our first follow-up visit (THE VISIT), Deborah and I had a difficult time in communicating. Mostly, the problem was that the material was new to Deborah and it was just her third day to interpret. She had just gotten comfortable with the tract material and I threw some new stuff at her. Anyway, during that visit, Meriane (who was on the team) made a decision to do what God was calling her to do - that is, go to missionary school. It was encouraging to me to find out that she started this schooling in January 2000."
When I explained what I had discovered to Deborah, I think that we both realized that we had been in a spiritual battle. We didn't know it at the time - we just knew that we were confused and frustrated. In the Bible, Satan is described as the author of confusion. He wants us to be frustrated. He wants us to feel that we are incompetent and ineffective - powerless. We determined that we would not let him win.
July 7, 1999 - initially, it started out as a disaster. Time has proven that there were some spiritual battles being fought that day. Battles in the visits, between and within people. A day that changed me. I suspect that it changed everyone else (Deborah, Juliana, Meriane and Elane). Many times, we go on these mission trips to do something for God - we forget that the most important work may be what God does for us.