Insatiable (5/5)

By Rin

Summary:  Drew comes to a decision in his life.  Can Jeff take the steps necessary to rectify it?

Disclaimer:  I do not know any of the members of 98°.  I do not know their sexual orientation or preferences and what not.  This is purely a work of fiction and any relation to real persons of events takes place in my demented little mind. ;)

Jeff and Jess were just finishing their dinner of stir-fried vegetables and chicken when the doorbell sounded through the empty house.  Looking up at Jeff with a small smile, Jess stood up.  Jeff didn’t move from where he stood.  When she turned to look at him, she could see he was trying to keep his hands from shaking.

“Jeff?  What’s wrong?  You’re acting like you’re nervous about something.”

Looking down at his hands, he laughed softly.  “Look at me.  Here I am trying to get back the best thing I have ever had in my life and I’m acting like a ten year-old getting ready for a fight with the school yard bully.”  Shaking his head, he smiled at Jess and squared his shoulders. 

Heading out of the kitchen, he winked at her.  She was always amazed at how easily he could center his emotions when he needed to.  But she also recognized this Jeff.  This wasn’t the Jeff she was friends with.  This was Jeff Timmons, heart throb, performer, and sex icon.  This was the persona he put on for the fans and the press.

It was then that she stopped him.  “Jeff.”

Turning to look at her, his smile faded when he saw the frown on her face.  “Jess?  What is it?”

“Don’t do it that way.”  Stepping up to him, she placed her hands on his shoulders.  She could feel the tension in the firm muscle beneath the warm skin.  She felt him tense even more at her comment.

“What way?” 

“It won’t work if  you put on the ‘I’m Jeff Timmons, adore me’ attitude.  You should know that.  He’ll see it just as easily, if not more so than I just did.”  She was smiling up at him, her face showing the concern she felt.

Sighing, Jeff relaxed a bit.  “I didn’t even realize I did it.  Guess I need to watch what I’m doing here, huh?”

“I think that would be best.  C’mon, we need to get the door before Drew changes his mind and decides to leave.  You go sit on the couch, I’ll get the door.”

Nodding at her, Jeff headed over and sat on the sofa.  Well, if you could call perching on the edge looking like he was ready to jump up at the right word, sitting.  Glancing over at the door, he saw Jess reach down and pull the door open….and stop, staring out there, looking a bit dissapointed. 

Standing, Jeff saw her move to the side and admit two people into the house.  As they took of their hoods, he recognized Lance and Justin.  Trying not to let his disapointment show as much, he headed toward them.

“Hey guys.  What’s up?”

“Not much Jeff.  Where’s Drew?”  Lance was looking around while he asked Jeff his question.  Jeff noticed a ring on his left hand and quickly glanced toward Justin.  Justin was talking to Jess, grinning like an idiot when Jeff saw his matching ring.

He knew he should be happy for them, but at the moment, couldn’t bring himself to feel any joy over it.  “He’s not here.  He left, for a bit.”

Justin turned and smiled at Jeff as he nodded.  He was glancing around the room while talking.  “Oh, all right.  Well, we’re going to be in town for about a week or so.  We can always come by some other time….”  His voice faded as his eyes fell on something on the floor.  He glanced up at Jeff, an unspoken question on his face.  Turning to see what had caused Justin’s concern, he saw Lance picking up the broken picture frame from the floor. 

“Jeff?  Is everything all right?”

“Yeah, it just fell.  I hadn’t had a chance to clean it up yet.”

Jeff walked over and took the broken frame from Lance.  Looking up, he met Lance’s eyes and knew that Lance didn’t believe him.

“Jeff, what’s going on?  That picture sits across the room, on your mantle.  And there’s a dent in the wall here.”  Pointing out the obvious damage, Lance looked back at him.  “Where’s Drew?”  His voice was filled with concern and his eyes begged Jeff not to lie to him.

“He’s gone.”  Jeff answer was barely a whisper.  “Nick went to find him and bring him home so we could talk.”

Pulling of his coat, Lance walked over and pulled Jeff into a tight hug.  “Oh man, what happened?  Why did he leave?”

Pulling in a ragged breath, Jeff blinked away the unshed tears that had come with the confession.  “I’m not sure.  He just told me that he knew I didn’t love him anymore and left.  Said he needed some time away.”

“Time away for what?”  Jeff turned to see Justin looking at him.  Shrugging his shoulders, Jeff walked back over to the couch and sat down heavily.  Motioning toward the love seat across from him, he said, “Have a seat guys.  You might as well make yourselves comfortable.”

“Here, let me have your jackets.  I can’t believe you two are out on a night like this.”  Jess took their jackets, smiling at Jeff as she tried to lighten the mood in the room.  “You two go have a seat, I’ll go get us all something to drink.”

Heading over to the love seat, Lance and Justin sat down and looked toward Jeff.  “Did you guys have a fight?”  Lance leaned forward watching Jeff, his eyes filled with concern.  “Do you know where he went?”

Just then the front door opened and Nick walked in.  “Jeff!  Jess!  I found him!”  Turning to the sitting area, he stopped when he saw Justin and Lance.  “Oh, hi guys.”

“It’s ok, Nick, they know.”  Jeff was already across the room as he spoke.  “Is he coming home?”

“Yep, he was at Lea’s.  I thought I would find him there so I headed straight over there.  And sure enough, there he was.  He was on the phone with J. when Lea brought me in but he hung up really quick.  I can guess what they were talking about but I can’t tell you any of the details.”

“He was probably talking to him about us.”  Jeff walked back over to the couch and went to sit down when he heard the crunch.  Glancing over, he saw Nick leaning down and picking up the broken glass on the floor. 

“Jeff?  What’s this from?”

“Nick don’t cut yourself.”  Jess sounded almost motherly as she walked into the room with a tray of drinks.  “Here, you take these, I’ll clean that up.”  Handing Nick the tray, she started picking up the glass and proceeded to ignore the rest of them.  Or so they thought.

As Nick handed the drinks to Justin and Lance, he told Jeff his news.  “He should be here anytime now.  He was getting his things together when I left a while ago.  It may take him a bit longer to get here, it looked like they were trying to close the outer road along the coast as I was coming through.”

“It floods in rain like this,” Jeff said.  He wasn’t looking at anyone and his voice seemed distracted.  “What am I going to say to him when he gets here.”

“Well, you’re going to have to do it on your own.  We are leaving,” Jess said, walking back into the room.  She pointed at Justin and Lance as she walked over to the closet and pulled out their jackets.  “I know you just got here but I think right now it would be best if no one else were here to get in the way while they try to sort things out.”

“Yeah, I thought about that.  Hang on Jess, I’ll pull the car around.”  Nick headed out the door as Justin told Lance that he would do the same.  Taking his jacket from Jess, he said good night to Jeff and Jess and headed out the door.

Pulling her own jacket on, Jess kissed Jeff on the cheek and smiled at him.  “Don’t worry, it’ll be fine.  I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Thanks Jess.  For everything.”  Jeff waved at her as she ran out into the rain and climbed into Nick’s Jeep.  Turning to Lance, Jeff smiled at the southern man who was one of his closest friends outside of his family.  “Thanks for coming by Lance.”

“No problem Jeff.  Just let me know how everything goes, all right?”

“I will, thanks.”  Jeff leaned in and pulled Lance into a tight hug and then waved at Justin as Lance headed out into the rain.  That was when he noticed the headlights coming up the drive.  Lance and Justin pulled away and Drew’s truck came to a skidding halt in front of the house.

Taking a deep breath Jeff watched him climb out of the car and run up the steps.  He smiled at him and reached out to embrace him but stopped when he saw the smoldering look in Drew’s eyes.  “Drew?  What’s wrong?”

“Who the fuck was that?”

“Who?”  Drew’s behavior confused Jeff as he looked at him.  Before he could realize who Drew was talking about Drew lost it.

“They guy I just saw you with!  Who the fuck was it?  Ya know, this is just like you!  Nick comes over to tell me that your hurt and confused because I left and I come home and find you with some other guy on the porch?!”

“Drew, wait a second.  That was…”

“Who was it?!”  Drew’s voice was raw with anger as he stared at Jeff.  He had moisture running down his face and Jeff didn’t think it was rain.

“It was Lance!”  Jeff was beginning to get a bit scared.  He had never seen Drew like this before.  “He and Justin stopped by a bit ago.  They left when Nick came back to tell me you were on your way home.”  He stepped back from Drew with a bit of hesitation.

Drew said nothing for a moment.  Turning away from Jeff he stared off into the night sky for a bit while Jeff stood in the door behind him.  Neither of them moved.  Jeff wanted to reach out and grab Drew and pull him close but didn’t move.  He was scared that if he did, Drew might react against it. 

After a while, Jeff broke the tense silence.  “Drew, come inside.  Please?”  Drew turned at Jeff’s question to find him standing there, his eyes begging.

Walking past Jeff into the house, Drew wanted nothing more than to run.  His mind was telling him to flee but there was something else there, that small glimmer of hope that everything would work out right.  He walked into the living room and stopped.  He scanned the room, taking in everything.  Looking toward the fireplace, he noticed something was missing.

He turned to Jeff, his eyes accusatory.  “You took the picture down?  That was quick.”

“It’s on the table.”  Jeff let a little bit of anger show in his voice.  He had wanted nothing more than for Drew to come home.  Now, he wasn’t so sure what he wanted.  One thing he did know was that Drew was really beginning to piss him off.

Drew walked over to the table and picked up the photo, noticing the broken frame and few pieces of glass remaining.  “You break it?”

“Yeah.  I got angry and threw it across the room.  It hit the wall and broke.”

Drew only grunted in response as he put the picture back down.  Turning away from Jeff, he walked toward the kitchen.  Jeff followed him quickly.  “Look, Drew, are you going to talk to me or give me the silent treatment all night?”

Drew pulled a beer from the fridge and opened it.  Taking a long pull from the bottle, he watched Jeff walk in and stand behind the counter.  “Well, I did come over to talk to you but now I don’t know what to say.  I come home, find you on the porch embracing someone.”  He held up a hand, forestalling the argument getting ready to come from Jeff.  “I know it was Lance.  You told me.  But look at it from my perspective.  I leave tonight because I don’t feel that you love me anymore.  Don’t ask me why, I just feel that way.  I come home and find you on the porch with another man in your arms.  What was I supposed to think?  Come on Jeff!”

Jeff didn’t respond.  He couldn’t.  Standing there facing Drew, he was scared to say anything.  He knew that saying the wrong thing right now could ruin everything.  So he let Drew vent his anger.  For now.

“Then I come in and find that the picture of us at our wedding is broken.  By you, in a fit of what I can only assume was anger at my leaving.  Well, do I have everything right so far?”  Drew stood there waiting for Jeff’s answer.

Sighing, Jeff nodded.   When he looked at Drew he saw, for just a moment, something in his eyes.  “Drew?  Do you still love me?”

Drew set his beer down in the counter and closed his eyes for a moment.  Jeff stood there, tense with anticipation, afraid of what the answer would be.

“Yes, I do.  With all my soul,” Drew said.  He looked up and had tears in his eyes.  “I can’t help it.  I do still love you.”

“Well, I still love you.  Wait…let me finish.  I still love you.  I never stopped.  I know that things have cooled-off, for lack of a better word for it.  But, that doesn’t mean that we don’t love each other anymore.”

Jeff stopped, waiting for Drew to respond.  Watching him, he could see Drew thinking about what he had just heard.  Not wanting to lose the moment, he continued.  “I never wanted anything like this to happen.  I was talking to Jess after Nick left to find you.  She asked me something that I have to admit I’m still confused about.  I feel kind of foolish not noticing it to tell you the truth.”  Jeff was now walking around the kitchen randomly.  He needed to move.  He felt that if he stood still for too long he would explode with everything raging inside of him.

“What’s that?”

Jeff stopped and looked over at Drew’s quiet question.  He was leaning back against the fridge, his hands in his pockets, looking up at him with his head leaned forward slightly. 

“Well, she asked me what you said when you left.  I told her that you said you knew I didn’t love you anymore.  I’ve been thinking about that all evening.  Jess and were talking about it and she asked if had fought recently or anything.  The only one that I can remember is the one we had over kids.”

“Yeah?”  Drew was watching him closely now. 

“Well, the only thing I can think of is that is when it all started.  I realize that I haven’t been around much lately.  But, I never thought about it.  I just needed something to do.”

“Wait, Jeff, you lost me.”  Drew walked over to him and looked at him.  Sighing loudly he threw his arms up in the air.  “What?  You’re not making sense!”

“I don’t know what to say!”  Drew pulled back as Jeff yelled at him.  “God, this is ridiculous!  Drew, come on, we’ve been through too many things to have something come between us!  We can work through this…this…whatever it is.  Please?”

“Will you stop saying please?  It’s beginning to get annoying.”  Walking over to the table, he sat down and rested his head in his hands.  “Lea said something similar.”

Stopping his pacing, Jeff  turned and looked at him curiously.  “What?”

“Well, she mentioned that we’ve been going non-stop for almost two years now.  Touring, recording and what not.  Plus, she asked me when the last time we made love was.”

”Well that’s easy…um…well now that I think about it.  It has been a while hasn’t it?”  Jeff couldn’t believe that he was actually getting Drew to talk to him now.  Not wanting to loose this chance, he pressed on.  “Come on Drew, give me some time.  Please?  Let me prove that I still love you.”

Looking up at Jeff, he smiled softly.  “Well, I guess it’s worth a try.  I mean, what else do we have to lose?”

“Us, that’s what we have to lose and  I don’t want to lose that.  I want us back the way we were.  I’m begging here Drew.”

Sighing loudly Drew stood up.  “You’re right.  I guess we can at least try.  But, I’m warning you.  I’m not going to be won over that easily.  I’m going to bed.”

Watching him walk out of the room, Jeff spoke up.  “I’m going to sleep in the extra bedroom tonight.  Would that make you feel better?”

“Yeah, I think it would.  Give me some time to think about this, ok?”

“Sure.  Thanks Drew.”

“Don’t thank me yet, we still have quite a bit to work out.”  With this said, Drew turned and headed for the stairs, leaving Jeff alone in the kitchen.

Shaking his head, he headed into the living room.  He noticed the broken picture frame sitting on the tabel and stopped.  Walking over and picking it up, he placed it on the mantle and sighed.  “Well, it looks like there are more things here that will need mending besides the two of us.”

Walking away, Jeff started humming softly to himself.  After locking the house, he turned off the lights and headed up the stairs.  Stopping on the landing at the top, he looked out the window there and saw the clouds break through and admit the sunrise.  Smiling to himself, he thought that it was the perfect start to the new day in his life. 

END

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