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Part One
by Rinny

Timeline: Takes place Senior year, doesn't really matter when. Pacey and Joey never got together in Season three, even though there was something significant between them.

"...and so, what the author is trying to say is that if he really wanted to eat oysters, he would." The girl paused, twirling a strand of hair around her index finger, "but he doesn't, so he wont!" Tara finished happily, popping her wad of gum back into her mouth. She returned to her seat behind Pacey, winking at Grant as she passed his desk.

Pacey quickly shot a worried glance at the clock above the doorway as Mrs. Lory, their English teacher, asked for volunteers. Only ten minutes left until lunch. Only time enough for one more presentation. "Please, please, please, please, not me." He whispered under his breath.

The Drama quarter of English 7, the bane of all seniors. The teachers were required to teach drama for two months, in leu of an actual drama class. This year their new English teacher, Mrs. Lory, was way to enthusiastic about it. For the most part Pacey didn't mind, acting was always more interesting than reading from a book. He found himself to be much more comfortable slipping into someone else's skin than in his own. Of course, teachers always find a way of ruining things, and Mrs. Lory was no exception. She came up with the most perverse assignments... like this one.

She called it Oral Interpretation. Basically, what they did was choose a poem, read it out loud, and discuss what you think it means. She claimed it combined English and Drama, and that the class should be able to feel the meaning behind the poem if you put emotion into the words. It sounded like a load of crap, and the class told Mrs. Lory as much. Still she enforced it, so here he was, nervous as hell, because he'd done something so out of character.

Most of the class had chosen either easy or funny poems, with little or no depth. Some of the girls had chosen romantic ones, and a few, like Joey, had chosen truly beautiful pieces of poetry. Pacey could still hear her voice ringing in his ears. Her words, spoken softly, but clearly and had held him enraptured as he watched her. Head bent over the podium, her hands gripping it's sides tightly as she opened her heart to the classroom of students. Most hadn't been listening closely enough to hear her voice grow thick with unshed tears for a mother five years dead. He, of course, had.

She hadn't lifted her eyes from the paper until she had finished reading, they immediately sought his own. He'd smiled sadly at her, sharing her sorrow and conveying his pride at her courage. Mrs. Lory interrupted their silent exchange, and Joey's gaze fell shyly back to the podium. Pacey never took his eyes off her as the class discussed her poem and she shared her own thoughts, guarded, of course. She never once mentioned her mother.

Ten minutes now, and only three students left to go. He prayed Mrs. Lory would choose one of the others. He'd taken a different route with this assignment, had deviated from the norm. Against his better judgement he hadn't chosen a comedic poem, that's what they were all expecting, something to make them laugh. Not something close to his heart.

That's what this poem was, close to his heart. Very close. Reading over the short poem, he felt like a fool. He'd give anything to change his mind, choose something different. And if he made it through the next ten minutes without making an appearance at the podium, that's exactly what he'd do. Straight to the library to find something fun to read, something they'd expect. Maybe something to do with monkies.

"Pacey Witter, why don't you go?" Mrs. Lory asked, like so many other teachers, phrasing the words like a question, meaning them as a command.

The class perked up as he made his way up the isle, anticipating a small reprieve from the redundancy of the other poems. He surveyed the room, twenty-three faces looking expectantly up at him. He really saw only one... Joey's. Her eye's warm, a tiny slightly amused smile across her face, her eyebrows drawn together in confusion. She must have sensed his nervousness, and it worried her. He was never nervous in front of the class. He was in his element when the center of attention. But this time something was off, and she knew it.

Placing the paper on the podium, he quickly swiped his sweaty hands across the front of his jeans and cleared his throat of the growing lump. "A Kiss-" he had trouble making his voice cooperate. He tried again, louder this time. "A Kiss On the Head, By Marina Tsvetayeva."

"A kiss on the head wipes away misery," he began, pausing before he continued. "I kiss your head."

His deep voice caressed the words, breathing life into them. "A kiss on the eyes takes away sleeplessness... I kiss your eyes."

Involuntarily his eyes lifted to meet Joey's, and stayed there, he continued on by memory. "A kiss on the lips quenches the deepest thirst... I kiss your lips." His voice grew husky.

His tempo slowed his voice grew shallow and thick with emotion, "A kiss on the head wipes away memory." He paused at length, still lost in the brown depths of Joey's eyes. "I kiss your head." He finished, his voice just above a whisper.

"Thank you, Pacey." Mrs. Lory said smiling, "Okay, class, what was the meaning behind Pacey's poem?" Pacey mentally shook himself from the small trance he had fallen into. Feeling a small blush climb up his neck, he immediately looked away from Joey and back to the teacher.

"It's about the guy who likes kissin'." Grant spoke up, "Head, lips, eyes, feet... he don't care." He gave his friend a high-five and smiled cockily.

"Is that what you think Pacey was trying to get across?" Mrs. Lory asked the rest of the group thoughtfully, "Think about his inflections, the expressions on his face as he spoke..." Pacey inwardly winced, God, he could only imagine the lovesick expression on his face. "Dannie?"

The quiet girl in the front of the room spoke up, "I think the poem is about love," she said. "The girl, you did say it was by a woman, right?" He nodded, "Well, It's about this girl who has feelings for this guy, but she doesn't want anyone to know, so she takes his memory."

Mrs. Lory nodded satisfied by that analysis, "Anyone else?" She asked absently as she began to scribble on her clipboard. "Okay, then, Pacey, share with us your interpreta- Joey?" She noticed the brunettes hand raises slightly away from her body.

From the moment he had begun, Joey Potter had felt a growing sickness in the pit of her stomach. His words had seeped down into the very deepest corners of her heart. It made her sick inside, the words, spoken so beautifully, shattering old wounds and ripping open scars. "I think it's about love." She spoke softly, gently, "Unrequited love."

Stunned, Pacey's eyes lifted to meet hers. "This person, man or woman, it doesn't really matter. This person is in love so deeply that they would do anything for the love of their life. Take away their sleeplessness and their thirst, just because he loves her." Joey was so caught up in her explanation, directed solely at the one person in the front of the room, she didn't notice her slip of the tongue. "And the last line... even though he's in love, he wipes away her memory because he knows that's not what she needs. So he walks away from her and she never knows all the love he had for her. That he was the one who loved her enough to take away her pain and bring her peace at the expense of his own." She finished, her eyes trained on him. gauging his reaction. Pacey was shocked and enthralled, listening to her describe exactly what was in his heart. "He was in love."

"Very astute, Joey. Excellent." Mrs. Lory interrupted the moment. "Pacey?"

His mouth had long since gone dry at her words. "I-" he worked past the cottonmouth and directed his wide-eyed gaze away from Joey. He knew he wouldn't be able to speak with her eyes devouring his. "Yeah, um, pretty much what she said. I think this person's in love, deeply enough to step away because that's what's best for the other person." He spoke with quiet conviction. "He loves her, aware from the very beginning that he'll have to step away at the end. But he goes to her out of love and takes care of her and takes away her memory of it because he knows that if she does remember it'll only bring her heartache. Out of love for her, he wont let her experience that heartbreak, he saves her from it. Sacrificing his heart, for her own." Pacey carefully kept his eyes away from hers during his small speech, opting to look at the poster of Shakespeare in the back of the room.

There were few students still listening by this point, most had begun to pack their things up in anticipation of the lunch bell. Mrs. Lory was quietly scribbling away on her score sheets. Joey was still in her seat, unmoving, an undecipherable expression on her face.

The students glared at the clock, minutes still remained before the bell would sound releasing them. Joey's hand shot up, as Pacey began to make his way back to the seat. He stopped. "Yeah?", he choked out.

"What if she didn't want to forget?" she asked impetuously.

Pacey shook his head, "But she did," he sputtered, unprepared for where this line of questioning was leading. "If she wanted to remember, she would have stopped him from 'wiping away' her memory," he quoted.

"What if this guy was so blinded by love, that he thought he was doing what was best for her, but not what she wanted?" Joey countered.

"If she had wanted him, she would have done something about it." Pacey answered sadly, no hint of malice in his voice. "Told him, thanked him for 'taking away her misery' or 'quenching her thirst'." His voice was tinged with pain. "He loved her enough to let her go."

The dismissal bell went by unnoticed by all in the classroom. The students, and even Mrs. Lory, knew that somewhere along the line, the topic of the discussion had moved from the poem to something else entirely.

Joey sat forward in her seat, moving her hands in emphasis, "What if she was confused by this new source of love? Surprised? Shocked? Maybe all she needed was time to get used to the idea?" Her voice dropped, and so did her eyes, unable to look into his stormy green one's any longer, "It didn't mean she wanted him to stop loving her."

"He didn't," Pacey exclaimed passionately. "He never stopped loving her, he just stopped making her aware of it." His voice dropped, "He thought that was what she wanted."

Joey shook her head sadly, "No," she paused near tears, "she only wanted time," with that she sprinted out the door, twenty-three pairs of eyes looked after her. Once she was gone, those eyes turned on him. He dropped his head to his chest, ignoring them he went back to his desk and collected his things. The room emptied, somberly he made his way to the door.

"Pacey?" Mrs. Lory queried, "Talk to her." She said softly before turning back to her work.

"It's not that easy." He muttered darkly to himself, and entered the empty hallway. It didn't take him long to reach his locker, since there were no crowds to fight, he exchanged his books for his lunch. Preparing himself to put on a facade of indifference at lunch. It was a little harder than usual. It had never been easy to pretend he didn't have feelings for Joey. But the knowledge that she had, or used to have, feelings for him suddenly turned his world upside down.

Reaching the cafeteria doors, he took at deep breath and forced a smile to his face. A quick scanning of the room told him Joey wasn't at their usual table, nor was she in the lunch line. He shook his head while making his way to their usual table, he wasn't sure wether to be disappointed or relieved.

"Good afternoon all," He greeted Dawson, Jen, and Jack, who were busy ingesting what appeared to be Salsebury steak. "Don't let me distract you from that enticing meal," he joked, seating himself across from Dawson.

Pacey visibly paled as he saw Joey and Andie enter the cafeteria. They were chatting amiably, unaware of Pacey's worried gaze. By the time they arrived at the table, Dawson had moved over to make room for Joey, as had Pacey for Andie.

"Hi, sweetie," Andie greeted him, planting a quick kiss on his lips.

Pacey forced a smile, "Hey, McPhee." He watched with hooded eyes as Dawson greeted Joey much the same way that Andie had greeted him. Immediatly after they pulled apart, Joey shot Pacey an nervous look, then quickly averted her eyes apprehensively Pacey forced himself to tear his eyes away from her, and join in the new topic at hand. He had pretended before... he could pretend again.

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