Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, and I don't own the song "Heart and Shoulder", Heather Nova and all her record execs do.
Author's Note: You may need a tissue... and then again, maybe you wont.
Wanna cry for you
Would it do any good?
If I rained for you
It would just be water
It took me a few days, Pace. But I stopped being angry. Oh, don't get me wrong, I wish I still were. God, I wish that more than anything. Being angry with you would be far more simpler than how I feel now.
Now, I just ache for you. For us.
After Prom, I kept running the scene through my head, feeling how much your words cut me. How deeply I bled because of something you said to me. I never thought you could hurt me. In any capacity. And for the first few days, that was all I felt.
And the night's with you
And the storm's in your hand
And you're down, and you're down
And I can't lift you
Now I ask myself how I could be so self-centered. Now, when I replay the prom in my mind, all I see is how obviously you were in pain. What you said wasn't about me, is was about you. Whatever anguish I was experiencing, you were feeling ten fold.
I'd have done almost anything to make you feel better about yourself. Your self-confidence was in shambles, and I didn't even recognize it. I hate that I had a part in your self-hatred, Pacey. More than anything, I hate that you don't know the man I love.
The man that you are.
And I hate that I can't introduce you to him.
I'm powerless to change your world
I'm powerless to stop the hurt
But I'll give you my heart
Give you my shoulder
I give you my heart
Give you my shoulder
Over and over
I promised myself that I'd be there for you whenever you need me. I didn't realize how hard that would be. I know that being around me hurts you...yet, there's no doubt in my mind that you love me. For all that you don't think there's a place for you in my life, there's always a place for you in my heart.
Wanna run for you
Would it do any good?
If I flew for you
You would still be standing
I want to turn around and march up to those Worthington inbreds and tell them I wont go to a school that wont accept you. I want to show you just how hard it will be to live without you. I want to show you just how wonderful a man you are. How loving. How giving. How smart. How loyal. How forgiving. How brave. How unique....how much you mean to me.
And it's hard watching
'Cause I'm part of you
And it's hard not to
Not to know what I can do
I'm powerless to change your world
I'm powerless to stop the hurt
I hate being powerless, Pacey. You know that. My whole life I've fought against being dependent on someone or something. Somewhere along the line, you broke down that need, and I, not so much depended on you, but simply loved you.
Love. It's a very simple word. But a very complex emotion. I loved you in the way that meant I'd to anything to help you.
But I'm powerless.
I'm trying hard to be your tower of strength
I'm trying hard to bring you back to joy
I'll give you my heart
Give you my shoulder
I give you my heart
Give you my shoulder
When the night just cuts you through
And the dream is lost to you
When you're worried and confused
I know it hurts, Pacey, to feel like you're nothing, but you're not nothing...you're my everything.
I will give you my heart give you my shoulder
I give you my heart
Give you my shoulder
Over and over
I'm standing in the airport, looking ridiculous in my blue graduation gown, the hat is somewhere between here and the school. I stand here frozen, staring after you as you walk away. For the first time in a long while, your step is light hearted, optimistic.
For a selfish moment, I stop and wonder if you're even going to miss me.
I know you will.
I'm proud of you, Pacey. Instead of wallowing in self-pity, your moving on to find yourself. A tear slips down my cheek because you wont find yourself with me.
I'm sorry my love wasn't enough.
Time and again
Give you my shoulder I will
I give you my heart
Give you my shoulder I will
Time and again
Over and over
The End
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