Pacey gazed around the crowded restaurant searching for his missing girlfriend. Plenty of Capesideians had gathered at the Leery's restaurant to ring in the New Year and somehow he and Jen had lost each other in the crowd. He pushed his way to the bar where his sister Gretchen was tending in order to help the Leery's out with the crowd. "Hey Gretch, you've seen Jen?" he asked, squeezing into a space at the bar.

Gretchen glanced up and smiled, looking out of place behind a bar in her red dress, and handed her brother a coke. "Nope, haven't seen her. This place is a madhouse," she yelled to be heard above the noise and handed the guy behind Pacey his drink.

Dawson joined Pacey at the bar, smiling warmly at Gretchen, "Soda, please." He ordered before turning to Pacey. "You're looking...not to happish." He commented

Pacey glanced at his watch. "It's almost midnight and I can't find my girlfriend. You've seen Jen?"

He checked his watch, "Not in the last half an hour. Last I saw of her, she was hanging out with Andie." Pacey turned to scan the room for the two blondes, "Hey, Pace. You haven't seen Joey have you? She said she'd come."

"Nope," he said with a shake of his and quickly finished his soda. "Haven't seen, Potter. Haven't seen much of anyone around here." His eyes traveled across the crowded restaurant. "Business is good. Your parents must be happy."

"Yeah," Dawson nodded. "Yeah, we had to hire ten more staff." He watched Pacey out of the corner of his eye, "Henry included."

Pacey nodded pulling out some bills and placing them under his glass. "Yeah, well, I'm gonna go resume my search for Lindley. Tell her I'm looking for her if you see her." He disappeared back into the crowd.

Gretchen raised an eyebrow at Dawson as she watched her brother and took the glass and the money off the counter. "What was that all about?"

"I'm not entirely sure," Dawson watched his friend retreat. "I think he's really stressed right now. He and Joey had a fight, but she won't tell me what about. And with Henry back in town, I think he's feeling a little threatened." He shrugged. "He and I aren't as close as we used to be, otherwise I'd know exactly what's on his mind."

She shrugged taking the order of the next customer. "I'll try to get it out of him later."

Dawson nodded and took his drink to leave her alone to work. He began scanning the room for his friends so they could ring in the approaching New Year together.


"Henry," Jen giggled pushing him away from her as he nuzzled her neck. "Stop that. People might see us." Jen's eyes quickly scanned the crowded from the shadowy corner she and Henry had found themselves in. She smiled at him in amusement. "Shouldn't you be working or something?"

"It's almost midnight," he replied, brushing her hair behind her ear. "No one wants me interrupting their pre-midnight pairing up asking them if I can clear their table."

A frowned marred her lips and she gazed back at the crowd uneasily. "Maybe I should go find Pacey."

Henry frowned at the mention of the other boy's name, "Jen, when are you going to tell him?"

She reached for his hand and squeezed it reassuringly. "Soon, it's just that the holidays don't seem like the right time to break up with someone and I don't want to hurt him."

He smiled. "Good, I'm getting kinda tired of having to share you."

She smiled weakly. "Don't worry I'll tell him soon."

The crowd gathered at Leery's Fresh Fish, started the count down. Henry leaned in to whisper in her ear, his voice joining the rest of the patrons. "6...5...4...3..."

Shit, where was she? Pacey wondered as he searched the crowd for Jen. The countdown had already begun and she was still nowhere in sight. He smiled to himself as he spotted the back of her familiar curled blonde hair and pushed his way through the crowd to her.

"One," she finished softly as the crowd began to cheer and shout; and she raised her lips to Henry's, giving him a tender kiss. Slowly, she pulled away, basking in the afterglow of their kiss. Her eyes fluttered open to look into Henry's warm eyes, only to find herself distracted by the horrified look she saw there. Immediatly, she turned around and gasped.

His blue eyes were wounded and he turned away from her in hurt and disappointment. He swallowed hard past the lump in his throat and calmly walked away ignoring the sharp, sting of tears in his eyes as he shoved his way through the crowd and out the back doors.

"Oh God," Jen mouthed, her eyes watering as she watched his back retreat. "That didn't just happen." She pushed Henry away, who watched her with confusion. Biting her lip, she zigzagged her way through the crowd, trying to keep Pacey in sight and keep up with his longer strides at the same time.

The cold night air was a relief to his flushed skin and he shut his eyes to the sights and sound of the party going on inside. He leaned against the brick wall to the Leery's restaurant, the scene from before stuck on continuous repeat in his mind along with the fact that Joey was right. Tears threatened to fall from his lashes and he breathed in deeply, letting the icy air into his lungs.

Jen burst through the main doors, frantically looking back and forth down the street for Pacey's frame. "Aghhh!" She tangled her hands in her hair in frustration at no sign of him. Tears threatened behind her eyes, this wasn't how he was supposed to find out. She was just going to break up with him and keep her relationship with Henry low key for a while, until Pacey was over it. It was the only solution she'd been able to come up with. Now...it had blown up and she'd hurt that last person she'd ever wanted to.

With a last desperate look down both sides of the street, she turned back to the restaurant. She'd just get Henry to take her home...then she could try and find him. She froze, seeing him leaning up against the wall, his hands braced on his knees and his head bent to the ground. She approached him slowly, almost fearfully. "Pace..."

"So where's Henry? You two dating now? Fooling around? He your new guy on the side?" Pacey asked bitterly straightening up and narrowing his eyes at her.

"I-" she stepped back in surprise at the magnitude of his glare. "He-he's inside."

"So are you going to explain to me what's going on? Or since I'm just the boyfriend I guess I'm not privy to that information."

The tears building in Jen's eyes ran down her flushed cheeks. How could she even say it? "God, Pacey," she moved closer to him, "I'm sorry," she choked, "I'm so sorry."

He glanced away from her, staring out at the darkness, unable to stand the tears in her eyes. "What are you crying for? You got what you wanted right?"

"No," she shook her head furiously, the curls of her hair hitting her in the face. "I never, ever wanted this."

"But you want Henry," he said quietly, resignedly. She just looked at him, biting her lip until it bled. She couldn't give voice to her answer.

"So I guess I should be the selfless one, right? Let you go to him."

She winced, "Pacey...You deserve so much better." She sobbed at her inability to give him the love he so richly deserved.

"J-just save it okay? Because I can't force you to be with me and," his voice broke and he just threw his hands up in defeat. "Just leave before I say something stupid."

She swallowed the lump in her throat, slowly backing away from him. The winter cold was suddenly all too noticeable. "I'm sorry, Pacey, I'm so sorry." She cried before turning and walking as fast as she could back into the party.

"Jen, did you," he swallowed, stumbling over his words, "I mean, ever, really love me?" he asked softly bracing himself for the answer he knew he was going to receive but needing to ask anyway.

She froze, his question cascaded over her like ice. Reluctantly she turned around to face him, "I did, Pacey. I still do...just," she paused, "not the same way you did."


"Hey Joey." Bodie's head peeked around the door to her bedroom where she was currently curled up in bed with a book. She'd hoped to escape for a while into a world of someone else's creation. And, for a little while, it had worked.

"Hmm?" She flipped the book shut and tilted her head to Bodie.

"I think there's something outside you're gonna wanna see."

She sighed, and flipped the covers off. Immediately she shivered at the cold. "What is it, Bodie?"

"Get your coat and shoes." He answered before ducking out of the room.

Reluctantly she did as ordered and went out into the living room in her flannel pajamas, her coat in her arms. Bessie and Bodie had just returned from the Leery's Party, having left her alone to watch Alex. They'd been a little reluctant, but she'd insisted she'd rather be baby-sitting. And they weren't ones to turn down an offer to spend the evening together.

Bessie pointed out the back window and took Bodie's hand leading him back towards their bedroom. Frowning, Joey went to the window to see Pacey's familiar form sitting at the end of her dock, something in his hand. She frowned; he wasn't even wearing a coat.

The light sound of footsteps behind him disturbed his solitude and he twisted his head to find Joey standing behind him, huddled in her coat her face contorted into one of concern and confusion. He smiled bitingly at her, his blue eyes dead, and red rimmed and raised the bottle of champagne he had stolen from the party in mock toast. "Happy New Years, Jo. It promises to be a hell of a year." He brought the bottle to his lips and took a healthy drink before turning his head to gaze back out at the water. He could barely make out Jen's house across the creek in the pervading darkness. He wondered if she was home yet. Henry would probably give her a ride. In more ways than one, he thought cynically.

Her brow furrowed in recognition of the pain that simply radiated from him. She shrugged out of her coat and laid it over his shoulders. He was considerably larger than she was, but it was better than that long sleeved shirt he was wearing.

Eyeing the bottle of champagne warily, she sat down beside him on the dock. "Happy New Year, Pace."

"So tell me, Potter, why aren't you out living it up with the rest of the townsfolk?" He ran his eyes disinterestedly over her attire.

She tucked her hands under her legs to keep them warm. "I didn't want to be around any of the townsfolk."

He nodded taking another drink. "Of course. I forgot. You're antisocial." He shrugged her jacket off his shoulders and placed it around hers.

She took it back without comment, not wanting to push the issue. "Why are you out here in the cold without a coat?"

He glanced around himself realizing that she was right and shrugged it off again. "I must've forgotten it."

She nodded, taking a deep breath. "And why are you drinking?"

"Why, to celebrate the New Year, of course. Champagne is the appropriate beverage is it not? Or is that just something else I got wrong?" He raised an eyebrow and took another swig from the bottle.

"What happened tonight, Pace?" she asked softly, watching him painfully.

"You were right, Joey? Is that what you want to hear? You. Were. Right." He laughed coldly. "You were right and I was wrong, as always."

"No, that's not what I wanted to hear." She shook her head, "I didn't want to be right, I wish I'd been wrong. I wish I hadn't seen them."

"You know what? I wish that too." He raised the bottle to his lips and took another drink.

"Alcohol isn't gonna make it better, Pacey."

"Yeah, well, it helps."

She put her hand over it, stopping it from completing its journey to his mouth. "Let me help instead."

He eyed her coolly. "No offense, Potter, but I really don't feel like talking about it."

"Then we won't talk."

He dropped his eyes to her hand. "Then kindly release the bottle."

"No, Pacey." She frowned determinedly at him.

"Potter, I'm not really feeling nice tonight. I will push you in," he said warningly.

"In January? In my pajamas?"

"Probably be the closest you'll get to being wet," he leered.

Pain flashed in her eyes and she looked away, releasing the bottle. She knew he was just lashing out, but that didn't take the sting out of his words. "Drink up, Pacey," she muttered, curling her legs up under her, resting her chin on her knees as she stared into the black water.

He was silent for a moment taking in her hunched over form and placed a hand on her shoulder, strands of her hair barely brushing his knuckles. "I'm sorry, Potter. Pay no mind to the drunk."

She shook her head, staring unseeing down at the water. "You've got nothing to apologize for."

He sighed and moved closer to her, resting his head on her shoulder, hating that he made her upset. He tilted his head up at her, watching her faltering expression and dropped his eyes back to the water, the scent of her shampoo wafting into his nostrils. He turned his head and dropped a kiss on her shoulder. "I'm sorry, Potter," he breathed softly. He nuzzled her hair off her shoulder, the scent of her shampoo stronger now, pervading his senses. He brushed his lips against her neck. "I'm sorry."

She sighed at his unexpected display of affection and leaned into him. She shivered, from a combination of the January cold and his lips on her skin, "So am I," she murmured.

"Don't be." He pulled away, "You should go inside."

"Only if you come with me." She said, wrapping an arm around his shoulder.

He shook his head, choking the neck of the bottle as he took another drink. "I-I think I want to stay out here."

"Pacey, it's cold." He didn't say anything and she stood up, "Fine." She ran back to the house and returned five minutes later with Bodie's coat for him, and a down comforter for them both.

"You don't have to stay out here with me, y'know."

She shrugged, handing him the coat and sitting back down beside him, "Someone's gotta make sure you don't fall into the creek when you decide the cold's too much and try to stumble out of here."

"Like anyone would care, " Pacey muttered.

"I'd care." She replied. "Put the coat on."

He watched her with thinly veiled amusement. "And if I don't, what are you going to do? Make me?"

"Fine, Pacey. Don't put it on." She slid over beside him and wrapped the comforter around them both. She pulled it closed in front of her and sat stiffly beside him.

"You need to loosen up, Potter," Pacey commented noticing how tense she was and placed a hand on her knee.

She jumped at the contact, his hand was ice. Taking it between hers, she rubbed briskly attempting to warm him, "I'm just worried about you."

He chuckled incredulously. "I don't know why you waste your time."

"Does it matter?"

"So, remind me again, why you aren't out with Jen and Andie breaking hearts. Because that's what you girls are good at, or is it just mine?"

She swallowed, "Did I break your heart, Pacey?" She asked softly, wondering if she was just like the two other girls who'd torn him apart.

"That was a long time ago, Potter."

"So was Andie." She replied, "But did I?"

"Don't ask."

She nodded, letting it go. Maybe she didn't really want to know. Squeezing his hand between hers, she rested her head on his shoulder, trying to think of some way she could comfort him.

He kissed the top of her head and smiled, caressing the back of her hand with his thumb, his voice a low rumble in his throat. "Your hair smells good."

"Strawberry." She lifted her head and kissed his cheek, letting her lips linger over his skin. To the best that she could figure, he needed some affection, and that, she could give him willingly. "I know this isn't going to make a difference, but you deserve better."

He was quiet for a moment staring out of the water contemplatively. "Thanks."

She lifted his free hand to her lips, kissing the back of it, "I'm just speaking the truth." She brushed the tip of his index finger with her lips, "You know, Pace. There are people who love you." She concentrated on his fingers so she wouldn't have to look at him. "Even if they aren't the ones you want."

He let out a shaky breath watching her intently. "Y-yeah?"

She nodded, smiling weakly at the hope in his eyes. "Yeah."

A vague smile came across his lips. "So I'm not too much of a lost cause?"

She shook her head, "You were never a lost cause." She kissed his cheek again, "You were always a very found cause."

"I think you're the one that has gone soft, Potter."

"I've always been a softy," She rested her head back on his shoulder. "You just didn't know it."

He nodded. "I must've missed it all those times you were insulting me."

"Oh shut up," she nudged him with her leg, "It was for your own good."

"Right. I needed someone to put me in my place," he smiled wryly, "but I think you enjoy it too much, Potter."

She smiled, "So? Is it wrong to get pleasure from pulling you down a notch?"

"I think you need a new pastime, because believe me, there're far more enjoyable things," he said suggestively.

"Don't worry, Pace. I wouldn't dream of saying anything now. I think you're pretty much on the lowest possible wrung at this point."

"You're so good at not making me feel better."

She smiled, slightly amused. "I thought you're letting the alcohol do that?"

"And it is, believe me it is," he said bringing the bottle to his lips. "I'm feeling far less�of anything now."

"Some people would consider that a bad thing." She watched him swallow a few gulps of the Champaign, itching to take it away from him.

"You should have some, Potter. It'll probably loosen you up."

"You up for sharing?" She arched an eyebrow at him.

"You mean am I scared I'll catch your cooties if we share the bottle? Then no," he said dryly handing it to her.

She eyed it warily, what could one sip hurt? Besides, maybe it'd warm her up. Tilting her head back, she drank a mouthful and grimaced, handing it back to him.

He smiled taking it back from her. "You're so predictable."

"So you'd like to think." She muttered, tugging the blanket tighter around them.

"You're cold?" It came out more of a statement than a question and he set the bottle down beside him.

"It's the middle of the night in January, aren't you?"

He shook his head. "I told you to go back inside."

"And told you, I'm not going in there without you. I know you have a death wish and all, but freezing to death? Not the way to do it. And besides...I'm kinda fond of you." A gust of wind picked up and sent a shiver through her body.

He moved back on the dock and patted the space between his legs. "C'mere Potter."

She watched him for a moment, then moved to sit between his legs. "You know, we could go inside and you wouldn't have to touch me."

"Oh, yeah. Horror of horror's, Pacey Witter is going to touch Joey Potter." He wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his chin on her shoulder. "See?" he breathed lightly. "Not so bad."

She shivered again and tensed, this time not from the cold, but from the rush of heat. "I-I didn't mean that. I just thought that anyone with breasts would be considered enemy number one to Pacey Witter."

"You have breasts?" Pacey joked.

"By any male's standards, no." She tilted her head to the side, resting it against Pacey's. "But yes, I do."

He slid his hands under the bottom of her pajama top, placing his palms flat against her stomach. "Feel warm now," he murmured.

"Not so much, your hands are ice." She replied quietly, moving her hands over his slowly, she caressed them hoping to warm them a little. Inwardly, she just enjoyed the intimacy of the moment.

"Sorry."

"Don't be," she leaned back against him, relaxing the back of her head against his shoulder.

He rubbed his thumb over her stomach in concentric circles sliding his hands up under her ribs. "They warmer now?"

She inhaled the cold night hair slowly, "Umm hmm." She shifted closer to his body, his warmth enveloping her.

He buried his head against her neck, inhaling deeply. "Good."

She shivered again, her breath catching in her throat feeling his breath cascade over her neck, heightening her awareness of him. She brushed her thumbs over the backs of his hands. "We can talk about it, if you want." She offered after a few moments.

He shook his head, his lips barely brushing her neck. "Let's not talk."

"Wha-, um, what else would you have in mind."

"Well...we can just sit here..."

She nodded slowly, "Sitting's good."

He ran his fingers over the smooth skin of her stomach. "Sitting's very good."

"You, um, sure you're not cold?" She asked distractedly, trying to figure out what he was doing.

"Why, are you?"

"Uh uh," she tilted her neck away from him ever so lightly, baring fresh skin to the cold night air and his warm breath.

"Do you want to go inside?"

"Will you come with me?"

He placed a light kiss on her neck. "Want me to?"

"Pacey," she said softly, "What are you doing?"

"Quite honestly Potter, I have no idea. I'm just making this up as I go along." He ran his fingers through her hair.

"You're hurting, Pacey." She pointed out, keeping her voice low.

His eyes clouded and he moved away from her. "I-I know. I'm sorry."

"Don't be," She put her hands on his knees, stopping him from moving.

"I-I don't know what I'm doing here, Potter." His voice broke and he let out a choked sob. "I just know that I don't want to hurt."

She bit her lip, and turned in the circle of his arms and cupped his face, tears shining in her eyes. "I don't want you to hurt either, Pace." Softly, she touched her lips to his.

He instinctively pulled her closer to him, tangling his hand in the fine strands of her hair. He touched the tip of his tongue to her lips, gently prodding them open, wanting to t aste the warmth of her mouth, wanting to get lost in her.

She opened her mouth easily under his, so desperate to give him whatever he needed. She ran her hands tenderly through his hair, reassuring him. He broke away from her breathing heavily and began an assault of kisses on every inch of her face before moving on to her neck.

Sighing, she offered her neck to him. Ignoring the voice in the back of her mind telling her this was the worst possible thing she could do. It felt so right though...and she kept telling herself it was for him. Disregarding the fact that she needed this almost as much as he did.

He slipped a hand under her top, his lips claiming hers again in a desperate kiss. She wound an arm around his neck, pulling herself as close to him as she could get. The champagne on his lips was bittersweet, his hands were cold as they touched her, even so, he suffused her body with warmth. Her heart was beating against her ribs, carrying the a drenaline from his kisses tingling through ever inch of her body.

He nuzzled her neck, his hand moving to cup her breast. He raised his lips and nipped at her earlobe, idly wondering if she'd always felt this good, tasted this sweet.

She gasped lightly, his touch intoxicating, clouding out the protests in the back of her mind. Her eyes fell closed and she arched her breasts closer to him.

"Jo," he whispered huskily as he kissed the back of her neck his hands massaging the supple skin of her breast. He swept his thumbs over her nipples feeling them tighten under the barest of touches. "Want me to make you wet, Jo?" He breathed into her ear before capturing the lobe in his mouth and sucking on it gently.

She stiffened under his assault, her mouth falling open in an 'O' shape. She fumbled for words for a few minutes, "Pace...c-come inside with me, please?"

"Is that what you want, Potter?" He trailed a series of kisses along her neckline. "Do you want to come?"

She tightened her hand on the back of his neck, pulling his lips back to hers, kissing him deeply. She pulled away, gasping for breath. "I want to love you, Pacey," she whispered almost inaudibly.

He kissed her lips lightly. "Then let's go inside."

She took a deep breath and nodded, extracting herself from him. The cold bit into her flushed skin as she stood, offering a hand to him.

He stood up grabbing the coats and blanket in one arm and swung the other around her shoulder. "Lead the way, Potter." He stumbled slightly, and she put a hand to his chest to steady him. She frowned at the reminder he was drunk and kissed the corner of his mouth as they walked up to her house.

His hands skimmed over her body through her clothing and coat, keeping her blood pounding as she tried to get him into the house quietly. He tripped over the rug just inside the hall and she had to catch him from crashing into the doorway. Soon enough, they were safely in her room, and she clicked the door locked behind them.

He dropped the blanket onto her floor and wrapped his arms around her waist, crushing her to him as his lips found hers again. His hands slid between them and he tugged at her top, trying to get it off her.

She pulled away from him a little, walking backwards toward her stereo, pulling him with her by the collar. She turned her head to the side and pressed play, turning the volume up just enough so not to distract any guests, but loud enough to cover the sound of two people in her room. Pacey took the opportunity to trail wet kisses down her neck, his fingers fumbled with the buttons down the front of her pajama tops.

He placed a large hand against the small of her back and guided her to her bed. His other busy at undoing her buttons. She fell eagerly back against the blankets of her bed, she watched him as he worked his way down the shirt, her thumbs smoothed the wrinkles of concentration on his forehead. Leaning up, she kissed his forehead, his cheeks, his eye lids and his lips, "You're wonderful, Pacey." She murmured, leaning back against the pillows, her top fell open, the buttons undone.

His lips fell to her chest and he nuzzled the side of her breast. His tongue searched out the hard tip of her nipple and he wrapped his lips around it suckling on her skin hungrily.

She moaned low in her throat, arching her back closer to him. His tongue evoked thrilling darts of pleasure that stole over her body. She'd never imagined he could feel this good. Her fingers clawed at his shirt, she craved feel his warm skin at her fingertips.

He clumsily kissed his way to her other breast. His free hand traveled the distance along her stomach to the waistband of her pajama bottoms, and slid a hand under the elastic.

Excitement coursed through her and she arched her hips closer to his touch. "Pacey..." she sighed.

"I guess I was wrong before," he breathed against her stomach as he moved down her body.

"Uh huh," she swallowed thickly, the anticipation of whatever he was about to do to her sent her head spinning. "Very wrong."

His hands ran over her ribcage coming to rest on her hips and he eased the material of her pajama bottoms down, sliding them over her legs. His fingers skimmed the smooth skin of her legs, massaging her calves lightly. He raised her leg kissing her ankle. He slowly moved up her legs, placing tender kisses along her calve, the back of her knee, running his tongue along the crease. His hands moved up to her inner thighs, stroking the skin softly.

She trembled, her blood rushing to pool hotly between her legs. Her hand came to tangle in his short hair, she needed to touch him. Nervously, she let her legs fall open under his tender onslaught, desire and fear warring within her.

His hands gently massaged the outside of her legs as his tongue and mouth languidly made their way further up her trembling thighs. He paused at the delicate cloth separating his mouth from the rest of her. With surprising gentleness, he ran his finger over the edge of the thin cloth, tracing over the lace seam. Joey slightly parted her legs some more and Pacey continued undaunted, daring to touch her only through the damp cloth, before slipping a finger inside the edge.

She shuddered, his finger grazing the swollen lips of her sex. Her hips involuntarily pressed closer to him, "Pacey, God..."

He grinned wickedly and slid another finger inside. Joey groaned pressing herself against his hand as he stealthily slid another finger beneath the thin cloth, expertly weaving his fingers in and out of her.

She moaned at the mind-blowing sensations his fingers were evoking from her. She threaded her fingers through his hair, and pulled his face up to hers, arching her hips in slow rhythm as he continued to move his fingers in and out of her.

He brushed his lips against her ear, his voice husky and deep with desire. "Potter, I want to taste you." He touched his tongue to the pulse point behind her ear, his fingers increasing in tandem. "I want to bury my head between your legs, thrust my tongue so deep inside you�I want to make you scream."

Her vision swam around her, and she closed her eyes trying to find words through the haze of pleasure. "M-make me scream, Pace." She pleaded in a whisper, turning her head to capture his mouth with hers, her tongue dove into the recess of his mouth, drinking in his taste.

He pulled away from her, dropping to his knees in front of the bed and brought his hands under the waistband to her underwear smoothing the material over her long legs.

She sat up on her elbows to watch him, every nerve ending on fire. He tossed her underwear to the side and slowly kissed his way up her legs, each brush of his lips sending darts of heat to swirl between her legs. She threw her head back and moaned as he used his fingers to part her moistened folds. Her heady scent wafted to his nostrils and he licked his lips in anticipation.

He began to kiss her softly avoiding the bundle of nerves at her center. After he had kissed every inch of her, he began to slowly massage her clit with his tongue. She arched her hips closer to his face, gasping for breath, unable to comprehend how amazing he was making her feel. She was awash in the glow of it. "Pacey," she moaned his name over and over again as his tongue and mouth pushed her higher and higher, "Pacey."

He continued his ministrations eagerly; her soft gasps and sighs spurring him on as he strove to drive her to new heights. She moaned into the blankets as the her orgasm crashed through her. She sobbed his name as wave after wave shook violently through her body.

He slid over her body, the roughness of his clothes rubbing against her hypersensitive skin, "You didn't scream."

"I didn't want to wake anyone." She murmured back, watching him through dazed eyes. Why had she done this to herself? She wondered. She lifted herself up and crushed his lips to hers, effectively blocking out the thoughts. She'd face the consequences later. For now, he needed her and she wanted to be needed by him.

His tongue moved into her mouth, and she could taste herself. Smiling faintly, she helped him remove his shirt, his movements clumsy in his drunken state. Her hands smoothed over the warmth of his skin. Just touching him, feeling his muscles move under her fingertips filled her with a warmth. She peppered his face and neck with kisses as he squeezed his eyes closed against her assault. His muscles flexed and quivered under her lips as she explored him with relish.

Tentatively, she kissed one small brown nipple and smiled as he groaned, his fingers running through her hair. "You're beautiful, Pacey," She whispered.

He looked up at her through the haze of alcohol in his eyes. "Love me, Joey." He pleaded, the despair she saw there made her ache for him.

"I love you, I do, Pacey. I love you," The confession slipped from her lips before she could do anything to stop it. The words sounded so right to her. She unzipped his jeans and pulled them and his boxers down his legs. "I love you so much," she whispered brokenly, once she was back at his side. "I'm always gonna love you."

She reached between them, caressing the skin of his stomach, her fingers grazing over the sparse hairs the lower she moved. Shyly, she touched the length of his penis, feeling it harden further under her touch. She stroked the length of him, watching in fascination as he jerked beneath her.

He shifted restlessly on the bed, rolling over so she was beneath him. He breathed in her scent, kissing the supple skin of neck. The steel heat of him pressed against her hip, and she shifted upwards, her legs parting as he settled between them. The chords of Your Winter came through the radio, softly surrounding them.

He pulled away from her in a moment of sobriety and stared questioning into her eyes.

"Let me love you," she murmured, hooking her legs behind his thighs she pulled him into her moist sheath. There was a pause at the resistance of her virginity before he broke through and she cried out, tears stinging her eyes. She blinked them back and wrapped an arm around his neck. She clung to him, her chest meshing into his as he throbbed hotly inside her.

Sighing, he withdrew slowly and then buried himself inside her welcoming heat. Joey bit her lip against the pain his movement caused and angled her hips closer to him as a single tear ran down her cheek. Tenderly, she ran the fingers of one hand over his face, his eyes were squeezed tightly closed. Her touch encouraged them to open as with each thrust of his hips he reached deeper inside her.

His eyes shone with tears as he looked into her eyes. "I love you," she mouthed, another tear falling. It wasn't the pain that kept her crying, but the bittersweet pleasure that had begun to flower inside her. The reality of what she'd allowed to happen was sinking in as with each thrust of their hips she fell in love with him even more. She'd taken advantage of him...he was never going to forgive her. She arched her hips up, trying to lose herself in the act of making love to him.

He moaned with each thrust, his pace quickening, "Joey," he groaned, burying himself as deeply inside her as he could. He shuddered in her arms as he came. She felt his come splash inside her as he shuddered in her arms.

A fresh wave of tears threatened to overflow, and she nudged him, "Pacey..." he didn't move. "Pace, Pacey..." she blinked back the tears that gathered in her eyes, realizing he'd passed out. It was too much, she dissolved into tears, her body shaking with the strength of her sobs. She pressed her face into his shoulder, the tears moistening his skin as her mind tried to comprehend how horribly she'd screwed up. Her soft whimpering cries intermingled with the haunting music.

I won't be your winter
I won't be anyone's excuse to cry