I was alone, rejected, typically teen angst
Didn't feel typical at the time
In fact felt pretty damned abnormal
I picked up a pen
Left my wounded soul on the parchment
Resigned myself to my solitude
Shed my silent tears as I threw it on the www
Got used to the idea, the tears died away
Alone, I said, isn't all that bad
I blinked, and you were there
And how did you understand me so well
Distance was The Enemy
I was still alone, but not
You were the water, the wind, the stars
You became my world
I blinked, and I knew Love
Everything around us dissolved
Like artificial sweetner
Into passion and desire
And the hollowness of absence
That those two soon conquered
I blinked, and we were together
A two piece puzzle finally made whole
The physical only enhanced the emotional
Forever united, existing for each other
Plans and promises, and always music
I blinked, and three years had gone by
Like a dream, and I wanted to be comatose
A Thousand Teardrops and a thousand sweet kisses
A house, a boat, an RV, a child
Sarcoma
I blinked, and you were gone
And I am alone, barely existing at all
With tears that want to scream
Everything around me dissolves
Like a bad fade at the end of a 60's movie
What am I now without you
But an empty shell like the one I saw
Cold, unmoving flesh that so many times
Not enough times, was one with mine
New apartment, new job, new alternator
I feel so old
A lifetime in three years
Now how many more lifetimes
Of waking up alone
It won't get better
I'll never again be whole
I blinked
And the sound of my eyelids
Shattered my world
10/3/2000