Untitled Document

Nagi has been wandering around the house, in a much better mood than he's been in for the past few days. Of course, he's still worried about moving into Hold, but he keeps telling himself that if there's any trouble, Ran will help him. He drops onto Ran's bed in the room curling up contently. Ran was at work and would be back soon. Nagi has certainly missed him over the past few days and buries his face into the pillow, taking in Ran's scent.

Ran's home! And how do we know Ran's home? Because the door to the bedroom's just flung open, revealing a very bloodied, sweaty, and black-trenchcoat-with-too-many-buckles-clad Ran, complete with katana at his side. It's been a hard day at work, if his scowl is any indication of that, and he's looking forward to getting himself cleaned up and into bed. Nice, soft... bed... which is currently being occupied by Nagi. Hm. That's even better -- however bed might be delayed seeing as how Ran, the spitting imagine of his old Weiss self, may rouse a few suspicious questions looking like this...

Looking up from the pillow he'd been curled up with Nagi blinks once, then twice then sits up completely, looking Ran over. Wide eyes. "...Ran?" For someone who said he couldn't go back to the Weiss life, he certainly didn't look like he was making an effort to avoid it.

Ran disappears into the bathroom quick, grabbing first aid supplies and a wet washcloth, wiping his jacket semi-clean and shedding out of it to go about tending to his wounds (a few deep cuts and minor scratches, nothing serious). He doesn't even really seem to have noticed Nagi's in the room right now, too busy trying to come down off of this adrenaline high. The best part about his new job is that he gets to vent a -LOT- of frustration...

Nagi gets up and follows Ran into the bathroom, looking /very/ worried. He picks Ran's coat up off the floor and looks it over, seeing the blood and tears. He drops it again and moves to Ran, grabbing the hydrogen peroxide and beginning to disinfect the cuts and scratches for Ran. Nagi's brow is furrowed deeply and he seems pretty worried about what the hell Ran was doing, but he remains silent as he digs the dirt out of the wounds.

Ran winces, leaning back away from Nagi, waving a hand dismissingly, "You don't have to help." His voice his gruff, his eyes possessing that far-away look he gets when he's lost in his own little world, his expression blank and unreadable. Tonight was absolutely -envigorating-, now that he's out there on the field so to speak, instead of being stuck in training.

"Shut up and stay still," Nagi says, apparantly annoyed at Ran for coming in all bloody without a word. He finishes disinfecting and goes about bandaging each wound separately. After a long pause he finally speaks again. "Will you tell me what it is you do?" His voice is soft, and his chocolate eyes are focused on what he's doing. Whatever it is, it can't be good if Ran is going to come back bloody like this.

...who said it isn't good? Ran's not complaining about coming home all bloody, it's definitely not the first time he's done such a thing. But he does sit still, defeated, letting Nagi go about the task of wrapping him up as he answers his question. "Slayer -- that is, I'm a Slayer." And, unless Nagi's familiar with Hold, he probably has no idea what that is.

And he has no idea what that is. Nagi isn't familiar with Hold, he's barely ever entered the city unless it was to wander to the bookstore, and that was a rarity. "What is a Slayer?" he inquires, obviously not happy. It sounds dangerous whatever it is.

Ran quirks a smile, not-so-secretly amused by Nagi's reaction to all this. "Slayers follow around Seekers, who are in charge of watching out for ripples of Creation and helping people once they've arrived, and protect them in case any... dangerous creatures from other worlds ripple in." He winces again as Nagi grazes a sorespot. "Had an ugly son of bitch out there tonight, fire-breathing thing with horns. Took out a house in the Wilds, not far from here, and we nearly lost our Seeker." You see? Ran's an honorable man! He beats up big ugly demon things.

Well, that wasn't so bad... but what if Ran got hurt even worse than just a few cuts and scratches, hm? He finishes bandaging Ran's arm and glares up at the red-head; not happy that Ran finds his reaction amusing. "Sorry you find my worrying about you so amusing," he says, frowning before turning, picking up Ran's coat and walking back into the bedroom.

"You worry -too- much, Nagi," he says softly, putting the medical supplies away and joining him in the bedroom. He doesn't mind if the kid worries, but this was a hunderd times better than what he used to do back in their world... and far less grating on the soul. Slayers are not, despite the sound of their title, murderers.

Nagi has always been a worrier. It's his nature to be so. Of course, he worries more about Ran than about anyone else, so maybe he is overreacting, but how would Ran react if Nagi came in one night with cuts and blood all over him. Even if it wasn't that bad and it was for a good cause? Would he like to see Nagi bleeding? He didn't even like to see Nagi's neck, so how would he handle something like that? Nagi ignores the comment for the moment and puts the jacket in a pile of laundry that he was planning to do in the morning. He'd get the blood out for Ran before he had to go to 'work' again.

"...Gomen," he replies softly. Nagi lays down on the bed and curls up, still hugging the pillow. He really has missed Ran, and now, one of the only times he's seen the other man for any length of time, and he's retreating into his shell. Sigh.

"Don't apologize," he says, his response automatic anymore. So automatic, in fact, that he doesn't even need to come out of his shell to say it and can keep on cleaning the blade in his hands.
Ran, however, thinks very little of himself this way, you see. Blood on himself is nothing new, a fact he's grown to accept -- even if he claims to no longer be Weiss and no longer wants to live quite -that- way, it seems there's still a part of him that continues to fight. It's certainly not something he can shrug off in a day and at least -this- way he's a respectable member of Hold society. There is a HUGE difference between Weiss and Slayer. Pulling up a chair for himself by the window, Ran grabs his katana and goes about cleaning it quietly, perfectly content with retreating back into his own little world for the night.

Nagi wasn't going to be content with that. He flops back onto the bed and grabs the pillow, hugging it and staring at Ran. "How many Slayers go out with a Seeker?" he asks softly. He's intent on making sure that Ran will be safe. He has someone to care about and love and he doesn't want to lose that person in some stupid accident.

Ran, though content with keeping to himself right now, doesn't mind answering Nagi's questions if it'll help put his mind at ease. "Depends on the Seeker. There's usually five to six of us assigned to one."

That makes him feel infinitely better. Yes, okay he can handle this. He hopes. "...Have you told Aya-chan yet?" Nagi shudders to think how the young girl would react to Ran coming home one day covered in blood.

Ran doesn't answer that. Instead he gathers himself up inside his shell, voice hollow and lacking any sort of inflection whatsoever, "Can we not talk about Aya right now?" He's having a hard enough time getting her adjusted to his new personality let alone his past -- being a Slayer is definitely not something he's going to be able to hide if she's to live with them once they move out, but he'll tell her in due time. All in due time. There are still other little bits she doesn't know and he doesn't want to completely overwhelm her with everything all at once.

Nagi sits up. "I'M SORRY. SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY SORRY!" he shouts at Ran. His expression is one of someone who is somewhat upset that Ran is in his shell.

Ran stops, sullen, swallowing thickly after Nagi's done shouting at him, his tongue feeling like so much dead weight as he attempts to speak. "What... do you want me to do? To say? I can't... I can't do anything..." He's already failed to give up a life of fighting, of returning home every night from 'work' covered in blood and sweat and tears. He's tired. He's so very tired, but there isn't anything else he can do. Numb as he is right now, he hasn't even noticed that his hand's clenched around the blade, digging into his palm, crimson trickling down onto his knee.

Crawling out of bed, Nagi pads over to Ran and smacks him. "Wake up idiot, you're going to bleed to death," he growls, prying Ran's hand open and extracting the blade. Now, that's either going to bring Ran out of his stupor, and maybe knock some sense into him, or it's going to get Nagi killed. Either way, the git was going to bleed to death if he didn't slip into his shell while he was cleaning a sword.

"I don't think I can bleed to death, Nagi," he says darkly, lifting his hand to examine it as red pools in his palm and slips down his wrist. His eyes burn fire hot with rage, but it's not for Nagi. It's not for anyone but Takatori Reiji and Schwarz and all the other people responsible for dashing his little baby sister's dreams, for dashing is -own- dreams. "I've tried."

Nagi puts the sword carefully to the side and stops when Ran says that. He whirls around to look at the red head. He stands there, shocked for a moment before running in the bathroom to get a towel. He comes back and wraps it around Ran's hand and then kneels on the floor in front of the red-head. "...Please... Please Ran... Don't... Don't ever say that again," he whispers, his focus on Ran's hand. Nagi didn't like the thought of someone else killing Ran... but the thought of Ran killing himself just... Nagi couldn't even /handle/ that thought.

Oh, Ran didn't do it to -himself-. There were just some battles so intense in the past, his wounds so serious and he bled so much, so very very much, that he wondered as he lay there in a pool of his own blood what it would be like if he just let -go-... but Aya always brought him back. Aya smiling. Aya coming in to check on him when he worked at the restaurant. Aya's gift to him, those earrings, and the teasing note inside the birthday card that said to give said earrings to a girlfriend -- if he ever found one. A joke between them, yes; they were very good times. Funny how when Ran's life flashed before his eyes he only then realized what it was he's living -for-...

Ran continues to stare at his hand then, all wrapped up -- when did Nagi wrap it up? -- his mind closed off from the world for now. He can't hear a thing Nagi's saying.

Nagi has gone back into the bathroom and gotten bandages and wrapped Ran's hand... He's even cleaned the sword off and put it away, and is sitting in front of Ran when the other man finally notices that his hand is bandaged. "Ran? ...Ran? RAN?" Nagi shakes the other man a little, looking worried.

Ran blinks once, twice, thrice before recognition slowly works its way back into his empty gaze, the redhead leaning forward to rest his forehead on Nagi's shoulder. Arms heavy as lead come up to fist trembling hands in his shirt, his breath abnormally shallow. "I'm... okay..." He knows he's not fooling anyone, but he's stubborn just the same.

He blinks and wraps his arms around the red head, stroking his hair gently, soothingly. "Shh..." Nagi just sits there on the floor in front of Ran and holds the red head gently. Obviously something's wrong, though Nagi isn't exactly sure what it is. He feels horrible that he brought up Aya-chan, thinking that maybe this was his fault.

There's just a rush of old build-up resurfacing, too much coming to Ran's mind at once and overwhelming him. Looking even paler than usual, Ran sits up, taking a deep, cleansing breath, but only feeling a tad bit better for it. He runs a hand through his sweaty bangs, avoiding Nagi's worried gaze at all costs, guilty for knowing that he's making the other feel bad. He wants to tell him it's okay, it's nothing, but that as sure as he's sitting here would be a lie. He wants to tell the boy he -loves- him. He wants to tell him so many things but he's just too damn exhausted. So instead, he mumbles, "I'm sorry."

The chocolate-haired boy stands up and pulls Ran out of his chair and over to the bed. "Lay down. It'll help you breathe," he says softly, not forcing, but being insistant.

Ran complies, sinking down into the sheets -- those soft, comfortable sheets that he remembers he'd been longing for all night -- but doesn't let go of Nagi's hand, merely staring up at the ceiling. Quietly.

Nagi crawls into the bed with Ran and curls up against the red-head. He wants to help Ran. To help him forget, to help him destress, to help him be normal... anything. He hates feeling helpless. Nagi squeezes Ran's hand gently and nuzzles.

A few moments of silent nuzzling ensue, before Ran suddenly reaches out and molds his body against Nagi's, arms wrapped around him tight, legs tangling amidst the desperate embrace. The brunette's really his own hold onto reality right now. His face burried in Nagi's neck, he chokes out the words, "I love you, Nagi."

He holds Ran tightly, stroking the crimson locks at his fingertips and allowing Ran to do what he wanted. "I love you too, Ran," Nagi replies softly. He'll do anything to help Ran. Anything. And for now, he just holds Ran, trying to sooth him.

Having let sleep overtake him while sequestered safely in the warm arms of his lover, Ran has no intention of waking up anytime soon. He has indeed reached that phase between 'dreaming' and 'awake', where you can hear movement about the room but are still too damned tired to get your ass up and out of bed to rejoin the world of the living. No, Ran's very much so content staying this way, seeing as how he doesn't have anywhere to be; work wasn't until later tonight. Burying his face deeper into Nagi's shoulder, nuzzling his neck, he sighs sleepily and stirs a bit as the first gentle rays of sunshine sneak their way in through the blinds. Ugh. Morning. He feels like he's been hit by a bus; there's no way he's waking up yet.

Nagi has been awake for quite a while. In fact, he barely slept last night at all, instead just watching Ran. He smiles slightly as Ran stirs, hiding from the sunlight by burying his face into Nagi's shoulder. Nagi remains quiet for a little while, letting Ran try to sleep that extra few minutes before the sun is coming through the window in earnest - almost as if it's purposely trying to tell the two that it's morning and they should get their asses out of bed. Psh. Nagi could stay right here all day if he felt the need, take /that/, Sun.

Ran mutters something groggily -- don't ask what, caveman talk is hard to interpret -- and cracks open an eye, lifting his head slowly to look Nagi in the face. Grunt. Morning. Ugh. "'morning," he finally manages to utter, muffled by Nagi's chest as he curls up against the other. Yes, we're definitely feeling like we've been mowed over by a street cleaner this morning.

"Morning," he replies softly with a smile, looking down at the person who's face is buried in his chest. Ran was so cute before his coffee in the morning, though Nagi realises that after the mental exhaustion of the night before, Ran probably wasn't feeling his greatest. He looks like he has a hangover, really. Nagi runs his fingers soothingly through Ran's hair, letting him wake up at his own pace and planning to change all Ran's bandages when he crawled out of bed - before coffee - whether he liked it or not.

Still half asleep, Ran unconciously strokes Nagi's back through his shirt, returning the gentle touches. "Don't want to get up," he tries again, attempting that wonderful thing humans call 'speech'. Blearily he glares at the window, the SUN, that evil thing that wrenched him out of such a nice, deep sleep... the first really good deep sleep he's had in ages, but the kind that did nothing to squelch the mental exhaustion he mostly certainly feels. The kind that now has Ran wishing he could stay in bed all day.

Tickles! Ack! Nagi manages to stay still as Ran strokes his back, but it tickles and he has to bite his lip to keep from giggling. "Don't blame you," he murmurs with a lop-sided grin. Nagi nuzzles the top of Ran's head lightly and continues to play with the other's pretty crimson hair. "Though, we do need to change your bandages," Nagi points out.

Ran doesn't respond to that, not even to protest. Instead he just lays there, snuggling -- if Nagi wants to change any bandages he's going to have to drag him out of bed by himself.

Which Nagi could easily do, and he thinks Ran forgets that sometimes. Smirk. He's not so sure he wants to drag Ran out of bed yet though, he rather enjoys being snuggled. He can't suppress his giggles any longer though as Ran's hands were tickling horribly now. Nagi wasn't sure if Ran knew he was tickling or not, but it DID.

Ran mutters grumpily, glowering blearily at Nagi; what the hell's so funny, bub? But then he gets cranky, rolling over and taking the blankets with him, all bundled up in a nice little cocoon without anyone to bother him. Ha.

"You were tickling!" Nagi explains, rolling over and nestling against Ran's back. He's gonna drag you off to get your wounds re-bandaged in a minute if you didn't get up.

"Hmph!" Comes his response to that from inside the blankies. No coffee no breakfast make Ran a grumpy boy; but at least he's starting to wake up, finally. And it's because Nagi wants to motherhen him like that that he wants to stay in bed. He doesn't need anyone to baby him because of a few dumb little scratches.

Nagi rolls out of bed and stretches, cracking a few joints when he does. "C'mon Ran, get up. I gotta change your bandages," he says, tugging at the blankets that Ran's curled up in.

Slowly, ever so slowly, Ran sits up, scrubbing at his face with a hand and trying to flatten his ruffled hair. His eyes narrow as he watches Nagi, not amused in the slightest, and he barks, "I'm not helpless, you know!" Good morning, sunshine~!

"Of course you're not," Nagi says, beaming cheerfully at the red-head. "I'm going to change them anyway, now get your ass out of bed." Nagi is perfectly amiable throughout the entire sentence, looking absolutely the picture of sweetness and innocence when he closes his mouth again. In other words, get out of bed on your own power, or I move you myself.

Oh boy, but if looks could kill, Nagi would errupt into flames where he stands! "..." Ran protests not, however, knowing full well that it's either move or -be- moved. And so he drags himself out of bed and plops down in his chair by the window, zombie-like as he tries to rid himself of the last few bits of sleepfuzzies.

Nagi - still looking cheerful - goes about taking off the old bandages and cleaning the wounds with peroxide before rebandaging. It takes him about 10 minutes to do them all. "There, you may go get your coffee now," he says as he finishes wrapping Ran's hand. Nagi beams at the red head and kisses his nose.

Said nose wrinkles; what the hell's to be so goddamned cheerful for this early? Ran huffs, throwing on some slippers before meandering his way to the kitchen. Nagi's free to tag along, but he knows the drill by now; Ran's hardly a conversationalist anyway, but not being a morning person just makes it worse. He'll have to put up with Ran glaring at the coffee pot impatiently and wait until after those first half dozen cups reach his brain before he can get anything intelligible out of the man.

Nagi knows that. He takes the opportunity to get a shower in and to look at his neck, which was much better. One bite was gone completely and the other one was fading into a light scar. He finishes drying off and pads into the kitchen, watching Ran growl at the coffee maker for his 4th or 5th cup of coffee and snickering as he pulls some orange juice out of the fridge and sits down. "Feeling better?"

If Nagi's refering to his little... psychotic spell last night, he doesn't realize it. All he knows is that he's severly pissed off a the coffee maker right now and has half a mind to try and force it down the garbage disposal. So naturally, his answer is one big negativo. "No."

"I wasn't talking about the coffee, baka," he says, rolling his eyes and drinking the orange juice. Ran must be feeling better if he's so preoccupied with the coffee to not even realise what it is that Nagi's talking about.

"Hm?" Ran blinks cluelessly, but as the coffee finally finishes and he pours himself yet another cup, realization dawns at long last. "Oh -- yeah, I'm okay." But he's tense now thinking about it, embarrassed even, and knowing that if Nagi lets one little peep out about around the others... he may just very well kill him.

Ran knows very well that Nagi doesn't go off blabbing to everyone about things they talk about. Only when he's really really stressed or worried, and then maybe he'll go to Omi, but not all the time. Nagi finishes off his orange juice as Ran sits down with his new cup of coffee. "Good."

Ran, done with his coffee, heads for the shower without another word of last night. He's not in there long, just long enough to do what he needs to do, and emerges sometime later in the bedroom wrapped in a towel. He stops as he sees his katana laid out on the desk, contemplating... his hand stung a bit when he tried to wash his hair, getting soap in the cut and all. Towel-drying his hair, the redhead sighs and plops back down into his chair, reapplying bandages to his cuts and scrapes. He doesn't know what each night at work will bring; some nights are slow, others are jam-packed and overflowing to the brim with monsters to chase and people to protect. Lost in thought, it is that Ran sits, staring at that sheathed blade, oblivious to anyone and anything in the room.

Nagi, having eaten breakfast by this point and cleaned up the kitchen a little, comes back to see how Ran's doing. He's a worrywart and will want to make sure the wounds were rebandaged properly. Nagi enters, seeing Ran staring at the sheathed katana in a towel. Mmm. Towel. He wanders over and sits on the bed, eyeing Ran and then the sword. "Do you have to work tonight?" he asks suddenly, trying to pull Ran back into the real world.

"Aa." Good try Nagi, but no go. Ran's got his attention fixed on that sword, back inside his shell he is, with no intention of coming out anytime soon. There's just too damn much running through his mind right now, mostly having to do with his breakdown last night. He doesn't know why he did it, but he's feeling extremely nervous for it, if not embarrassed. He didn't want Nagi to see him like that, much less know that he -COULD- get that way.

He frowns a little and moves around so he's standing between Ran and the sword. "What time?" he attempts again, blocking the view.

"Four," he says, looking slightly annoyed now and... inconvenienced. For someone who like to be alone a lot himself, Nagi sure can't seem to understand Ran's need for the same right about now.

Nagi has missed Ran terribly over the past 4 days... and then last night. He was worried. He didn't want to leave Ran alone today, no matter how embarrassed Ran was about the night before. Nagi kneels down so he's even with the red-head, his worried brown eyes matching the irritated violet ones. He holds Ran's gaze silently for a moment before saying softly; "...I love you."

"...and what do you hope to do with that, Nagi?" Ran suddenly spats out; forgive him for being a cynic, but he really doesn't see where love is going to help whatever that was that plagued him last night for the first time in long time. He hadn't felt that way since he first killed a man, back when he was hunting Takatori by himself before being forced to join Weiss. Sure, outlets were nice, and most needed and appreciated, and he loved Nagi all the more for it... but it could not solve everything, could it? ...Of course, this could also just be Ran being extra grumpy this morning.

His eyebrow twitches slightly and he stands again. "I just thought it needed reiterated," he says, the worry and care in his face gone. "Sorry for standing between you and your true love." With that, Nagi steps from between Ran and the sword. So much for trying to be caring and supportive.

Ran doesn't respond to that. He's really good at convincing himself he doesn't care; he's selfish, utterly and completely, especially when he's in one of these more unpleasant moods. He goes about getting dressed then, throwing on a heavy black sweater and jeans, ignoring Nagi as he goes about collecting his laundry -- including his soiled jacket from last night. He'll just wander off now to the laundry room for some quiet time with Mr. Washer and Mrs. Dryer.

At least, he might if he could get the door open. Nagi sits down in the chair that Ran has just vacated and studies his fingernails as Ran tries - in vain - to open the door. Yes, a good dose of reality is what Ran needs, and when Nagi's in the mood he can certainly give that dose. Right now, he's not going to put up with Ran's git-ness.

Ran gives up finally, huffing as he spins around to glare daggers at the other sitting in the chair. The laundry's dropped to the floor, Ran's fists balling at his sides. "What, I suppose you want to talk?" Fine. Let's talk. But don't expect Ran to be civil.

The smaller man raises his hand and the katana flies across the room to him. He sets it down on the floor next to him, where Ran can't get it. "I think we'll leave this over here for the moment," he says to no one in particular and glances over at Ran, ignoring the daggers. "Why don't you sit down?"

"I'll stand, thank you." He stares at Nagi, arms crossed over his chest. Waiting. Impatiently, one might notice.

Oh, Nagi's going to take his time. Patience is a virtue. One that Ran needs to learn. "I'm not going to talk to you until you sit down and stop being a spoiled brat," he says. It's strange to see Nagi acting like this... it's usually how he'd deal with Farfello or Schuldich, not Ran, but hey, someone needs to beat him over the head with reality since Youji is out of commission.

Ran takes a seat on the nearest bed; his own. He knew there was a reason why he didn't want to get out of bed this morning. Hn. "Alright. Talk."

"...Now, I understand that you're not having the best week in the world. You're embarrassed about last night. A lot of things. But you're acting like a child. You get pissy when I try to help, you retreat into your little world and make everyone around you worry - including Aya-chan - then you get pissy again when someone tries to pull you back out again. You're being selfish, impatient, spoiled, and an ass in general. You have a lot on your mind, but believe it or not the people around you /want/ to help," he pauses for a moment, eyeing the red-head. "They can't if you keep doing this though, and if you keep doing this then you're going to repeat last night, again and again and next time I may not be there to take the katana away. You're being a dumbass, and I mean that in the most loving way," Nagi finishes, his expression just as blank and bland as it had been when he started.

"I can't let you worry about me," he says simply, staring off into space. Again. Stubborn man, this Mr. Fujimiya. He doesn't even blink at all the other things Nagi said, he knows he's a spoiled brat and selfish and a pain in the ass, he's convinced himself he doesn't care what others think about it all. It's a nice little barrier he's set up around himself.

Using his telekinesis, Nagi smacks Ran in the face with the nearest pillow. "Of course we're going to worry about you baka!" he shouts. "We LOVE you. That goes with the fucking territory." Whoa, Nagi said the 'f' word. He still looks fairly calm, if only slightly irritated. "And I know you care. If you didn't you wouldn't be so protective of Aya-chan, or you wouldn't have cared about this-" Nagi points to the scar on his neck. "Let us return the favour, cos if you don't want anyone to care about you then you're going to have to move to the middle of the desert or on top of a mountain and become a hermit."

WAUGH. Pillow to the face. Ran's positively fuming now, though outwardly calm his eyes downright -burn- with anger. "She -- " Aya-chan, naturally. "-- doesn't even recognize the person she's worrying about! The first and -only- person to ever give a damn about me in the past -doesn't even recognize me-. Do you understand that, Nagi? I don't need or want your fucking sympathy and neither does she. You say you care about her, you ask about her constantly, you treat her kindly... but where were you when Schuldig pushed her into that explosion? Where were you when the one thing that mattered most to me was taken away? What can you do about it now? Nothing. You're a little to late to be worrying about anything." He pauses, not really knowing what he's rambling on and on about but feeling all the better for getting all this out of his system. "Tell me, Nagi, just what it was that went through your mind when you heard from your leaders that my baby sister was in a coma? Were you disappointed that she hadn't died, like she was supposed to? Didn't you think the same about -me-? And do you honestly think you have any right to care now?!"

Nagi manages to keep a passive face though all of this, letting Ran get it all off his chest. He's silent for a moment after Ran is done and turns his face to the window, looking out. "Honestly, I didn't care, Ran. I didn't know who she was or why it was important to them for her or you to be dead. For a very long time, I didn't care about anything. I didn't have my own little world like you have, but I was never all there. Not... Not until I came here. With people being nice to me... caring about me. Then I started to care. Maybe I don't have a right to care now." He shrugs. "But when has caring ever been a /right/?" Nagi's chocolate eyes turn back to Ran's.

Ran flops down onto the bed now, rolling over so that his back is facing Nagi, curling up within himself. He can't stand thinking he was right even if he knows that he was wrong in saying all the things he said. They indeed were things he thought about often, but Ran didn't lie when he said Nagi is no longer a member of Schwarz. He didn't lie when he said that this world gave them another chance. And he most certainly doesn't doubt Nagi's ability to care. He just thinks its wasted on him, is all.

"If you keep doing that, Ran... If you keep curling into your own world like that... Whatever's eating at you is only going to get worse. It doesn't fix it. And in the end, you're just going to either repeat last night, or you'll lash out and probably hurt someone that you don't want to," Nagi says softly and stands, moving over to the bed. "Who cares about you can't always be helped. Who I decide to care about is up to me, just as who you care about is up to you. I choose to care about you because I want to. You may think I'm wasting my time or whatever... but I don't think I am." He sits on the bed, but is a little away from Ran. "Please Ran, don't do this to yourself."

"...Don't call me that," is all he says, softly, staring blankly at the wall.

Blink. "...W-what?" Nagi is a little confused by that statement.

For the longest time he hadn't gone by his real name. Coming to Shards and having Aya-chan delivered to him, seemingly out of thin air, alive and well, seemed to have settled things; he could let go of her name, couldn't he? But now as he's reminded day after day that Ran is -dead-, the Ran she loved dearly, he feels more and more inclined to give it up again. "My name. It's not 'Ran'."

He's unable to hide his emotion or worry any longer. Nagi grabs Ran's shoulder and rolls him over. "STOP THAT! Just stop it! You're Ran. Fujimiya Ran. NOT AYA. And if you get out of that fucking shell you could be yourself again!" Nagi yells at him. A few tears drop down his cheeks, surprising even him and he lets go to wipe them away and turn his back to Ran.

The others know him as Aya; a joke at first, as 'Aya' seemed to be the only thing he could say when he first joined Weiss. The name just sort of stuck ever since and he's felt no desire to give it up until just recently. But even then that was short lived. All he can do now, however, is reach out and fist a hand in the back of Nagi's shirt, tugging slightly. "Nagi..."

"...What?" he replies bitterly, his voice betraying the fact that he's still crying.

Ran -- Aya -- pulls himself up into a sitting position, the redhead gathering Nagi up into his arms from behind and into his lap. "Don't cry." Your tears are wasted, too.

Nagi remains there for a moment, just sobbing, trying to get ahold of himself; not even sure why he was crying to begin with. Maybe it was because Ran was doing something that Nagi had done once. Nagi recognised it and knew what it meant and it scared him. He finally pushes Ran away and climbs off the bed. "Leggo of me. You're not Ran. I don't know who you are," he says before running out of the room, crying, and slamming the door shut behind him.

It's been... days really. He somehow doubts that anyone's missed him, or even noticed he was gone. His clothes are dirty and caked with mud -some blood here and there- and they're also a little damp from the weather lately. Nagi is mussed, in dire need of a shower and probably some medical attention by the look of the cuts on his forehead and the tears in his clothing. He doesn't seem to care or notice them though. He seems a little thinner (if that's possible). Nagi walks idly onto the grounds and past the dragon barn, toward the house.

Just as Nagi's walking past the dragon barn, probably the last person he wants to see is walking out of said barn, then -- and if Nagi's not watching where he's going, the two are going to collide. There's a flicker of surprise in those violet eyes of his and he even reaches out to steady the boy, but the look quickly fades, replaced by an annoyed furrowing of his brow that says Nagi had better watch where he's going. He doesn't walk away, however; Aya's steely gaze is too transfixed on the mess that is Nagi right now.

Nope, definitely wasn't paying attention to his surroundings. Nagi seems surprised when he hits something and is steadied. He blinks and looks up at what he hit to see R-Aya- looking down at him with a familiar annoyed gaze. Nagi steps back from Aya and looks away. "Gomen nasai, Fujimiya-san. I should have been paying attention to where I was going," he says, not loudly, but clearly. Whatever parts of him are damaged, his voice certainly isn't.

"You're bleeding," Aya oh-so-obviously points out, his own little way of showing -- for what it's worth -- some concern. He's been avoiding everyone himself as of late, but that doesn't mean he hasn't noticed Nagi's absence.

"...It happens," Nagi replies, shrugging slightly, and wincing when he does so. It's obvious that the boy is uncomfortable around Aya at the moment. Part of him is trying desperately to block out any emotions and feelings he was having at the moment at seeing R-Aya- for the first time in a few days after... that. The other half of him was wanting to collapse into a pile of tears at the red-head's feet. The war between the two was certainly visible some what, but only to someone who was paying attention to the chocolate orbs that were focused on the grass at the moment.

Oh, he's noticed. Aya prides himself in being observant like that. "Go take a shower," he orders, speaking in a tone that says he's not to be disobeyed. "I'll make you something to eat." Because Nagi most certainly looks like he hasn't had anything to eat in days.

"...Hai..." Nagi obeys silently, following Ran into the house and locking himself in the bathroom for an hour, getting all the mud, grime, blood and anything else that has embedded itself in his skin and hair - out. It takes him another 15 mins just to bandage up any open cuts he has. He'll worry about disinfecting them and really cleaning them up later, for now he's content to just keep them from bleeding into his clothing. He throws out the clothing he has been wearing, it was way past any point where it could be repaired, and walks slowly into the kitchen. No, he hasn't really eaten in days and with the way his stomach is churning, he doubts he could eat anything right now either, but he sits down anyway.

A bowl of soup is set down gently before Nagi, Aya taking a seat across from him with a cup of coffee -- his beverage of choice -- in hand. He watches Nagi, expectantly, waiting for him to take at least a bite before saying -anything-. He, through all of this, has at least remembered to take care of himself.

One tends not to remember those sorts of things when one is blowing shit up. He had gone way out there, miles and miles from the farm and found somewhere with lots of monsters and not so many people... and released some pent up energy/stress/anger/whatever. Nagi has this inate ability to worry and fuss over the people around him and to generally forget about himself, often. Toto was an example of that. He had been so upset and worried about trying to protect her that he almost killed himself in the energy release that followed when he should have known better. Maybe subconsciously that's what he was trying to do here too. Nagi takes the spoon after a moment and stirs the liquid in the bowel in front of him, staring blankly at it.

Aya watches him for a few solid, silent moments, sighing deeply and walking his now empty cup over to the sink. If Nagi's not going take care of himself, there's nothing he can do about it. He knows the boy's just as stubborn -- if no moreso -- than he is. So he'll just meander on out into the living room and read the paper now and leave Nagi to his own devices, glad at least to see him home if nothing else. He can't ask for much more than that now, really.

When Aya leaves, the churning dies down again and Nagi manages to eat some of the soup, not all of it, but some is better than none. He places the bowel in the sink and rinses it off quickly before disappearing into the bathroom again to fix his visible wounds up correctly. About a half an hour later, he emmerges and sits carefully on the couch. Curling up against the pillows and staring off into space. He's in his own little world it seems.

Aya says nothing, merely sitting there reading his paper and letting Nagi drift off into his own world. If he doesn't know who Aya is, Aya doesn't blame him for not having anything to say to a stranger.

To Nagi, Aya is an enemy. Aya is Abyssinian. Aya is someone whom he fought over and over and over for years. Aya took away the person that Nagi loves. Aya is not Ran. "...Are you still moving out?" he asks finally, breaking the silence and leaning back to stare blankly at the ceiling. Anywhere but at the red-head.

"Aa." There's a place for him at the Slayer's Compound if he really wants it; said place being one of the safest places in this entire world. But he's also found a nice little apartment in Hold not far from the Seeker Center that looks promising, too. At this point, whether or not Nagi comes along is his perrogative, as it always was.

Why would Nagi go live with someone who didn't invite him? Someone he barely knows? Aya never invited him, Ran did, and as Nagi keeps telling himself, Aya is not Ran. "When are you leaving?" Yes, when? Hurry up and leave so he can go back to being miserable in peace.

Why, if Aya didn't know any better, you'd think Nagi was trying to get rid of him! ...Dropping the paper into his lap, the redhead stares at Nagi. And stares. And just keeps staring until the boy finally looks at him. And then he answers, tonelessly, "Today." He doesn't work tonight and it's not like he and his sister have a lot of things here of their own to move.

Nagi looks away again and closes his eyes. Great. Wonderful. It's just dandy. Then why does Nagi feel like crying again? "What did I do wrong?" he asks suddenly, opening his eyes again.

Aya wrinkles his nose. "What?" He's a little shocked Nagi is saying such a thing -- how is any of this -his- fault? Nagi's not to blame for Aya's hang-ups.

"You heard me... What did I do wrong? You were fine. Then that morning... that morning you weren't. You were gone. You became Aya again. What did I do? How did I screw up? ...This is killing me, you know. To be in the same room as you and to know that you're not /there/." Nagi's beginning to ramble now, just letting everything spill out. Obviously it had to be his fault. He must've done something to trigger this. Something he said or did or anything. Had he loved and cared for Ran too much or not enough or did he just fuck up in general?

"You didn't do anything," he says firmly, that same don't-you-dare-say-otherwise tone. There's a pause before the paper's lifted again; as far as Aya's concerned, they can end this discussion right here.

The paper is pulled from Aya's hands, folded neatly in mid-air and placed on the table. "Please don't try to brush it off like that," he says softly. "We can't just let things go like that. If the problems aren't fixed then they'll just build and build and we'll just keep hurting each other. I don't want to hurt you. I don't like hurting you and I don't like when you're hurting, whether its my fault or not." Nagi turns on the couch so he's facing Aya again. "Will you please talk to me and not push me away like that?"

Aya quirks an eyebrow, lavender searing holes through Nagi. "And what can you hope to 'fix', Nagi?" Aya doesn't need 'fixing'. He needs... time. He needs to shut himself off from the rest of you to gather his thoughts. He needs to get things sorted out on his own without any help from you all. He needs to take a step back and really look at himself and decide what kind of person he wants to be, now that the Ran his sister knew is dead.

He's been avoiding people for days and he says he needs time. He's had time. "Aya-chan. Us. Your identity crisis. Pick one," he says, chocolate orbs locked on the violet ones across from him.

"My sister is none of your business," he says flatly, fists clenching at his sides as he stands -- almost looking defensive. This is purely Aya here, the assassin that was bent on killing him -- and all of Schwarz -- in the past. "Why can't you understand that I just want to be left alone?"

"You've been left alone. You've had days... almost a week even, to be alone. Truly, you've been alone for years, Ran." Nagi remains sitting, staring passively at Ran, knowing full-well that he's walking a very thin line here. "...Everyone changes Ran. Everyone. Sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse, but everyone changes. You are never going to be the same Ran that Aya-chan knows. Ever again. That's something she'll have to learn to deal with. That's something you'll have to deal with. But. Just because you're not the innocent, naive brother she once knew, doesn't mean you can't still be the protective, loving, kind brother still. You'll just be that in a different way than before, but you'll still be that. Believe it or not, Aya-chan is a lot stronger than you give her credit for," Nagi tells him, quite calmly.

There's a rush of adrenaline then, Aya's eyes widening as Nagi speaks. For a moment he's awestruck, completely awestruck that Nagi's even daring to go -there-. And then that familiar tinge of anger reaches dark lavender, face flushed with the oncoming rage. "You little bastard," he growls. "Don't you -dare- preach to me. I tried to let you in -- " Invited him inside then shut the door in his face, really. " -- but do you honestly think you'll like what you see once you're there? You're right. I have changed. And it absolutely fucking -kills- her, Nagi." He can't get over the look of fear in her eyes. He doesn't know what he'd do if he saw the same in Nagi's.

"And you think -this- isn't killing -ME-?" the younger man snaps. No, he's not scared of Aya. Doubtful that he ever will be. "What do you think I would see there that I don't already have hidden away in myself? What could you have done that is anywhere near as bad as anything -I've- done?" Nagi stands up, only a few feet from where Aya is, the distance could be easily overcome. "She fears because she doesn't understand. You won't TELL her. You won't give her the chance of understanding, just like you won't give me the chance - and I'd probably understand better."

Aya stops. He buries his face in a hand, shaking his head; he's so tired. Tired of talking, tired of being here, tired and wishing he didn't care so damn much about Nagi right about now. He's sure as he's standing there that if Nagi were any other man he'd be dead where he stood. "Enough," he says, brushing past Nagi as he blindly makes his way for the door. "That's enough, I don't want to hear anymore."

That's if Nagi would let Aya kill him. Really, Aya fools himself by thinking he could really beat up on Nagi unless Nagi -let- him. "And that's exactly why you're so confused and screwed up right now, Ran. You WON'T listen. You hear the truth, you get slapped with reality and then you run away from it," Nagi growls as Aya pushes past him.

Yelling yelling yelling. It's not that Youji can make out what they're saying but he can certainly tell who's yelling. "Yare yare... Trouble in paradise." And thus Youji walks through the very same door Aya was trying to get out. It's a wonder if Youji didn't plan to hit the redhead with the door. But... That's a secret.

Aya, looking very much so like one big, ruffled, pissed off kitty, glares at Youji. He's. In. The. Way. "Move," he rumbles, rolling up his sleeve. The only other option is for Aya to move you himself -- and don't think he won't try.

Hosted by www.Geocities.ws