We live our lives with out feet firmly planted in the modern world. But the
trappings of modern life can sometimes be cruel. To survive our hazardous stumble down life's path we cushion our existence with "DREAMS." For the purpose of
sheer survival we shift from one foot to another jagging reality with dreams.
The following is one woman's "DREAM."
His doll like features and little belly laugh reminded her of her son. Yet he was
not her son. This child was a precious small branch of the tree of her existance. A
delicate new blooming twig of a human being called GRANDSON. How wonderful he was. The rememberance of her own children's youth had been reborn in this new small person.
Holding him in her arms for the first time, with tears in her eyes, she gently kissed him as she whispered, "welcome to the world Scott." He was the living promise of her
immortality. Theirs would be an eternal bond as they nurtured each other with
togetherness.
Yet still in his infancy he was torn from her arms. Not by the lurking shadow of death, but by the shadows who didn't understand that a grandparent's love is special.
The wailing winds of divorce severed the tiny branch from the nurturing tree of
grandparenthood. The breeze of ignorance destroyed the most precious of all ties
"love."
In death there is finality, a sudden stop to a relationship, but in separation there is agonizing longing, and in order to cope we DREAM. The joy of Scott's existence and presence had made each day more beautiful. But now taken away, he would never know her, and she would never see him again. So gently to cushion this harsh reality of separation, she DREAMS.
She DREAMS remembering how his tiny hand clutched her aging finger. She DREAMS remembering noisy bear hugs, as his small arms clinged to her.
She DREAMS, "dear lost grandson can you kick a football high in the sky like your grandpa?" Are you smart in school? I could help you with your math. Do you kneel by your bed and pray for others at night? I DREAM I hear your precious voice. Those child like words "God bless my Grandma. I DREAM (but you don't even know me).
I DREAM of you wrapped in my arms as I sing you a lullaby. I DREAM sweet little one of reading you the story of Baby Jesus under the Christmas tree. I DREAM
(but you don't even know me).
Spring is here in Elk Lake now. And oh its made for little boys just like you. But
spring brings my empty heart more longing. The huge budding Oak tree cries out
"little one come climb me!" Elk Lake calls "hurry Scott dive off grandma's dock, plunge into my cool playful waters."
I DREAM of hiding Easter eggs and hearing your eager voice say "Grandma,
Grandma I found one."
I DREAM of taking you fishing for the first time. Of placing the rod in your tiny exciting hands. Oh how I would jump up and down as you reeled in your first fish.
Oh Scott I miss you so! I DREAM (but you don't even know me).
Precious child fill your senses with the aroma of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies made just for you from grandma's kitchen. Little man let me tell you true family stories of courage and survival. You can pass them down to your children. I DREAM (but you don't even know me).
I DREAM of holding your swinging hand as we walk through the woods. I can hear your wonderment, "look quick Grandma, a deer." (But you don't even know me).
Dear child is there a grandma who kisses your tears away and makes it all better I hope so for I dream but you don't even know me.
I can never kiss your tears away or hold you in my arms. Take you fishing or bake you chocolate chip cookies.
I missed the miracle of your first tooth, your first steps. I will never pick up the phone and hear those special words " Hi Grandma." I have no cards or homework
sprinkled with pretty stars to place on my refrigerator. I will not proudly sit through school plays, buy raffle tickets, or worry about camping trips, but I DREAM.
The picture in my wallet fades, but the joy of our brief moments together, and that eternal last touch grows stronger.
I love you little boy, each day you grow. I miss your hugs, I miss your voice.
It is so sad for you will never know " I love you ". Each year on your birthday I
write you a little love note, and place it carefully in my Bible, knowing you will
never read them. (For you don't even know me).
But I know you sweet child. I know that we share the same world together. I
DREAM someday that when we are both in Heaven I will hear those " I've waited
for a lifetime words " Grandma here I am-- Here I am grandma!
But each night in this life as my head touches the pillow I pray " Dear Lord,
bless and keep safe my sweet grandson ". I sigh--close my eyes and then I
DREAM---Oh How I dream.
(Let each of us hug our grandchildren a little more this week).
Owenton News Hearld
by Helen Kramer
