I've noticed a reoccurring scenario arising in many of the lives of my peers and I feel that I can do you a better service by putting my advice out here all at once and let you take it or leave it. Then if you ever need to hear it again, you can just come back to this page whenever you need it, instead of feeling like you have to wait to talk to me or feeling like you're being a burden or intruding (because unfortunately I'm incredibly busy holding down 2 jobs and trying to support myself). I am honored that there are people who feel comfortable enough with me and trust me enough to confide in me and seek my advice. Please don't ever think that I don't appreciate the incredible compliment that you pay to me by wanting to share both your joys and your sorrows with me.
That being said, I think sometimes we need to hear the truth and get a swift kick in the butt to get us out of the emotional rut we've managed to get ourselves into. And what is the #1 thing that manages to get us into that rut in the first place? Self-pity! That's right, sometimes we need someone to say that it's time to stop complaining and take responsibility for our own lives. We need someone to tell us that it's time to move on from whatever it is that's hurting us, we need to learn to deal with our parents, with our ex-boyfriends, ex-girlfriends, stinky jobs, etc. etc. etc. And let me tell you, I have to deal with these things too... we all do, it's called life. Unfortunately, there's no get-out-of-jail-free card here. There's no magical cure, no perfect words to make us feel better about what we're NOT doing with our lives. (Ok, really swift kick coming...) If we're not happy with where we are in our lives, then it's time to evaluate the situations, figure out what exactly is makng everything so bad, and then change it! If that means taking risks, moving outside of our comfort zones, and possibly failing... do it anyway! That's the only way we will ever get out of the rut we're in right now.
I don't mean to offend anyone, and I know there will be many more times when I will need to read this, just to remind myself that I am responsible for my own happiness and success. Obviously, things happen all the time that are outside of our control. Tragedies occur that could cripple us if we let them (been there, done that, have the broken family to prove it). But we were never meant to live a life of shattered dreams and a broken spirit. We have been intended for much more than that, and no matter what the situation, big or small, we can overcome it and be happy and healthy again. I believe that and I hope you do too... and this belief also helps me to hold on to my sanity and keep the ulcers away!