Tom's mood seemed to be improving a little. He looked at his watch. "How long before tomorrow?"

"Well, let's see, what time is it now?" Téa asked.

Tom pressed the button on his watch. They heard the voice say, "Seven fifty-three PM."

"It's at night cause my watch says PM." Tom held up his wrist up and pressed the button again, so Téa could hear. The voice saying "AM" or "PM" seemed to be the only way Tom really understood the difference between day and night.

"Then it's about twelve hours until I come back tomorrow." Téa answered.

"TWELVE HOURS! That's forever!"

"No Boomer. It's not that long," Sam, interrupted. "You'll be asleep for most of it. Before you know it, Téa will be back."

Tom looked confused. "If I sleep real fast will Téa come back quicker?" They all tried not to laugh because Tom was so serious.

"I don't think so, you'll see, Honey, tomorrow will get here very fast," Susannah assured him.

"I'm gonna go to sleep right now." Tom stated. He wanted to get a head start on things.

Téa kissed him goodnight. She then said goodnight to Sam and Viki and Susannah. Carl was sitting at the door as she walked out, and she said her goodnights to him as well. She stopped at the nurses station to thank Connie for the flower.

"You are very welcome, Téa. You should have seen how excited he was when he realized he could have one to give to you." Téa smiled to herself but was sorry that Tom's surprise had been spoiled by his walking in while she and Kevin were laughing together. Téa wanted to make sure to thank Tom for the flower again tomorrow and tell him how much she loved him.

Tom was still tossing and turning when Connie came in with his evening meds and his feeding. He was trying, too hard, to fall asleep and his weary body wouldn't cooperate. He became anxious when Connie came to flush his feeding tube before she administered the supplement and the medications.

Sam was staying with Tom tonight. Susannah insisted, since all was relatively calm, that Viki go home and get a good night's sleep since she had a session the next morning. "It's all right Boomer. You know this doesn't hurt." Sam comforted him. He sat on the bed, next to Tom. He pulled Tom over until he was resting against him. Then Sam put his arms around him.

"Tom, you're just going to feel a small vibration in your throat when I do this. It feels more like a tickle. You've had this before, Hon. It didn't hurt." Connie assured him. She spoke soothingly to him while she worked. "Okay, Tom, I'm going to start the feeding now."

On Susannah's orders she mentioned nothing to him about the medication she was administering. Most of the children alters still became terrified at being given meds. Even when they were administered via the feeding tube and there was no shot involved or anything that tasted bad. It was not as important for them to be aware of their medications, as it eventually would be for Todd. For now, Todd was not able to be responsible for taking his medication. He was still not at the point where their importance could be discussed with him. When the day came that he was stable enough to go home, he would have to be willing to take his medications on his own. He would most likely still be on the antidepressant and the neuroleptic and the Procrit. If he did not agree to take it willingly, on his own, that would be a problem.

Once he realized that it really wasn't hurting, Tom relaxed against Sam. After a while the meds kicked in and Tom started to get sleepy. Sam carefully lowered him to the pillow.

"Coach?" Tom asked sleepily.

"What Boomer?" Sam stroked Tom's head.

"Is Kevin Téa's boyfriend?"

"Téa's boy...no. Boomer, what makes you think that? Téa is married to Todd."

"I know, but I thought maybe she's mad at Todd so he's her boyfriend." Tom's speech was starting to slur.

"No, Boomer, Kevin is not Téa's boyfriend. He came here with her tonight to see you. Don't you worry about that. Téa loves you very much."

"Okay," Tom was too sleepy to really comprehend what Sam was saying. "I love you Coach," Tom said, and closed his eyes.

"I love you too, Boomer." Sam kissed his forehead. "So was that it? Was he upset because he thought Kevin was Téa's boyfriend?" Sam thought to himself.

************************************************************

Bill was waiting for Susannah in her office when she returned. "You look refreshed," she commented, suddenly aware of the toll this long day had taken on her outfit and probably on her face.

"And you look beautiful." Susannah could see from the light in his eyes as he looked into hers that he meant it. "Are you hungry? Do you still want to go to Mario's"? Bill asked.

"Funny, but I'm starving and I really shouldn't be because I've already had a jump start on Mario's." Susannah told him about Tom coming out and Téa bringing a pizza from Mario's for him. She also told him about Rodd and then the memory that Todd had before he switched to Tom.

Bill could see that Susannah was feeling good about the day's events. He smiled when he heard about Rodd. He was happy that there was a part of Todd, other than The Baby, who was at peace and who could enjoy life in a mature way.

***************************************************

They sat in the back room at Mario's. Bill noticed how the candle on the red checkered tablecloth made Susannah's face even lovelier than usual. They shared a bottle of wine and sampled each other's dinners. Susannah felt the tension drain from her body. She had not realized how tight her muscles had been.

"Have you spoken to Sam and Viki about Michelle's parents yet?" Bill asked.

"No, there was no real opportunity to. I want to make sure to do it when there is plenty of time to explain things properly. They also had a lot to handle today. I hope to get the chance tomorrow. I have a session with Viki, and maybe after that I can get her and Sam alone for a while."

Bill reached for Susannah's hands. He turned them, palm up. "You certainly keep them full. Do your patients and their families have any idea how lucky they are to have you on the case?"

Susannah smiled. "I make sure to let them know when they get my bill," Susannah joked. Then in a more serious tone, she said. "So far, Todd and his family haven't had much to feel encouraged about, but I think things may be looking up a little."

Bill was happy to hear that. "So, you're hoping that it will be progress with Todd from now on?"

"I hate to say it, but I know better than that. In most cases of severe abuse there is a pattern of pace and regression. Todd will remember something and seem to be improving and then take twenty steps backward. It's the usual way in these cases, but like most other things about Todd's case, it seems to happen in extremes."

"Wouldn't getting through the memory he had today just encourage him that he is strong enough to get through others?" Bill asked.

"No, not in the way you mean. In the long run it will be encouraging, but right afterward he is usually totally overwhelmed by the feelings the memories cause. He needs to dissociate in some way, either by switching or by putting himself into a trance state."

"It has to be so frustrating for his family. They must get their hopes up and then have them dashed when he regresses."

"They understand that it will probably happen and they understand why it happens, but yes, they can't help but hope it will be different, that this time he will just pace ahead and not regress."

"I have a feeling they are not the only ones who hope that."

Susannah could never get over how well he knew her. "Yes," she confessed. "I should know better, but I also hope that this time the pattern will be broken and there will be no regression, at least not a major one."

They spent the rest of the evening talking about the kind of place Bill was hoping to find. Susannah was surprised to find out that he loved to cook.

"That is great because cooking is definitely not one of my talents. My mom is a great cook, but my grandmother couldn't cook a good meal to save her life. I guess being a bad cook must skip a generation."

Bill laughed and said, "well with me around you won't starve."

"So I take it you need a place with a large, well equipped kitchen?"

"Oh yes. That is a definite must. It would be nice if it had plenty of room and a big yard for my kids and their dog. I know if they are away from Chicago for any length of time they will want to bring Patches. That reminds me. I read an article on the plane. It was about a program that brought pets into hospitals and nursing homes. They mentioned mental health patients. I was wondering if a visit from a cat or dog or even a bird might be helpful to Todd or the alters?"

Susannah was touched that Bill often thought about Todd and the children. "I do know about such programs and I have thought about it. It may be helpful. The only problem I can foresee is memories of the dog that Peter killed being brought forth by holding a pet again. There also might be a problem of attachment, for Todd and for the animal. The pet could only come and visit. I think Larry Wolek would give me permission for that, but it couldn't stay there full time. I am glad you brought it up again, I haven't thought about it for a while. Maybe it's time to give it some more thought?"

Bill and Susannah made plans to look at houses for rent on Saturday, if she was able. He understood that Todd was not just a Monday through Friday job. Susannah called the unit nurses station and was told that all was well and Tom had been medicated and fed and was sound asleep. Susannah was relieved she didn't have to go back to the hospital tonight. She looked at her watch. It was ten thirty.

"The Blockbuster near my apartment is open until midnight. Would you like to come over? We could rent a movie and get some popcorn."

"Now that's an idea," Bill answered and they headed for the video store. They rented "You've Got Mail," as neither of them had seen it. Susannah also rented the original Star Wars movie for Tom, should he be out tomorrow. They headed for Susannah's apartment.

Susannah got some sodas while Bill made the popcorn. When it was done they both headed for the couch and kicked their shoes off. Susannah liked that Bill was starting to feel at home in her apartment. Before Susannah realized she was doing it, she had snuggled in Bill's arms as they watched Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks converse on their computers. Bill asked Susannah if she wanted anymore popcorn. When she didn't answer he looked down and saw that she had fallen asleep. Bill knew how exhausted Susannah was. He was happy that there had been no crisis with Todd tonight. She needed to rest. He reached for the Afghan she kept over the back of the couch and carefully covered her with it. He looked down at Susannah's sleeping face. He smiled as he acknowledged the feelings he had for her. Bill gently brushed her hair to the side and kissed her forehead. He leaned back against the back of the couch, careful not to disturb Susannah. He continued to watch the movie. Soon, he too fell asleep.

Susannah was the first to awaken. She saw the sun streaming through the curtains. It took her a minute to get her bearings. She felt Bill's arm around her and looked up at him. She realized she had spent the night in his arms. At first she felt some embarrassment at having fallen asleep in the middle of the movie, but then she looked at Bill. He had a small smile on his face as he slept. She knew he was as happy to have spent the night holding her as she was to have been held. She snuggled in his arms for a few more minutes. Just enjoying the feeling. It was like nothing she had ever experienced before. Susannah could tell from the way the sun was shining that it was very early in the morning. She looked at her watch, sure enough it was only five after six. Apparently, she had not been called or beeped so there was no problem with Todd. Susannah debated whether or not to awaken Bill and tell him she was going to shower and change or to let him sleep. She opted for the latter.

As she massaged shampoo into her hair, Susannah kept remembering what it felt like to wake up in Bill's arms. It was definitely something she could get used to. She hoped Bill would be able to join her for some breakfast on the way to the hospital. Susannah towel dried her hair and threw her robe on. She headed to wake Bill up. As soon as she stepped out of the bathroom she smelled the wonderful aroma of coffee being brewed and something she didn't recognize that smelled just as good. Susannah saw that the couch was empty and the Afghan had been folded and put back in its place. She followed the aroma into the kitchen.

"Ah! Welcome to the day, Doctor Hanen. We really need to do some serious grocery shopping if I'm going to be visiting more often."

Smiling, Susannah walked over to the kitchen table. Somehow, out of the sparse amount of food Susannah kept Bill had managed to turn out a home cooked breakfast. Bill pulled out a chair for her. She sat down and stared at her plate in amazement. The omelet that sat on it looked and smelled delicious.

"How did you do this? I mean where did it all come from? I had nothing here."

"You had eggs. I improvised the rest," Bill answered and poured coffee into his cup and hers.

Susannah tasted the omelet. It was fantastic. "Mmmm, oh Commissioner Jackson, you are definitely a keeper."

"I was hoping one of my famous omelets would cinch the deal," Bill only half jokingly admitted. Susannah laughed.

Over breakfast, they made some tentative plans for the weekend, including a long overdue trip to the supermarket. "You'd better be careful there, Susannah you may start to like coming home at the end of the day."

Susannah paused for a moment. "My God!" She thought, "he's right." She hadn't thought of any place she'd lived in since she left home for college, as anything more than a place to wash, change and sleep. That was the difference. When Bill was there, her small apartment felt like a home. It felt like someplace she wanted to come back to at the end of the day.

They finished breakfast. While Bill took his shower, Susannah dressed and remembered to put the Star Wars video in her bag. They would take her car back to the hospital so Bill could pick up his. She hoped Viki had gotten a good night's sleep. She knew how draining it would be for Viki facing her own demons on top of Todd's. Susannah wondered about Sam and Téa and Kevin, too. She was thinking of approaching the idea of a family session with all of them. Blair too, if they and she were willing. Then maybe someday Todd would be able to participate as well. Right now, he could never handle that. Susannah stopped. She didn't want to get too far ahead of herself. Todd was strictly a "take it one day at a time" patient. That was part of the challenge of treating him. The only thing Susannah could usually predict about Todd was his unpredictability. In many ways he did not follow the path her other DID patients followed. His body did not react to medication in a predictable way. Todd was a challenge all right. He was the challenge of her life.

*******************************************************

Tom slept through the night. The medication kept the nightmares he was still prone to at bay. He was still asleep when Viki came back, at eight. Sam had been thinking about what Tom had asked him. Sam hated to think it, but he also noticed more of a closeness between Kevin and Téa. He wondered if it had been his imagination that Kevin seemed a little jealous over Rodd. He was sure there was nothing to it on Téa's end, but he was becoming a little concerned over Kevin. He understood both Kevin and Téa had been through a lot with Todd. They both had feelings of helplessness and guilt to contend with and he knew they each had their own baggage. He could understand them "crying" on each other's shoulders. He also knew that most of the alters, especially Tom, were very perceptive and would sense anything amiss in an instant. He couldn't help shake the feeling that Tom's instincts were telling him something was not quite right. Sam did not want to discuss this with Viki yet. He knew it would upset her. He would talk to Susannah about it first.

"Did he sleep through the night?" Viki whispered, after kissing Sam good morning.

"Yes, no nightmares. Not a whimper. He had some trouble falling asleep at first, because he was so tense, but the sleep medication Connie gave him put him right out. We both had a good night's sleep," Sam whispered back.

"He could use the rest after the day he had yesterday."

"Viki, he wasn't the only one. Did you get a good night's sleep?"

"Well, I missed you, but I did sleep fairly well. I am well rested for my session with Susannah. Has she been here yet?"

"No, not yet. She may be in her office, I'm not sure," Sam responded. He stretched and said to Viki, "As long as you're here I'm going to go shower and change. Have you had breakfast?"

"No, I thought once Susannah and Téa came in, and if Tom is okay, we could go have breakfast in the cafeteria."

"That's a great idea. Give me twenty minutes and I'm all yours."

"I may share you with Todd," Viki said, and hugged him.

Tom was still sleeping when Susannah showed up at eight-twenty. "I hear he had a good night."

"Yes, no nightmares, thank God!" Viki confirmed. She looked at Susannah closely. "You look well rested, too. I guess we all had a pretty good night." Susannah causally mentioned that she and Bill were watching a movie and she fell asleep and he stayed the night. Viki took her hands and smiled. "Are things getting serious for the two of you?"

"Well, it depends on your definition of serious. They are serious enough for me to do grocery shopping this weekend." Both women laughed.

Then, in a more serious tone, Viki asked, "Susannah, please tell me if I'm out of line here, but if you and Bill are getting serious, don't you think you should tell Nora. She is your sister and she lives here in Llanview. Would you want her to hear it from someone else?"

Susannah had thought about that, but pushed it out of her mind. She hadn't spoken to Nora in months. "Bo has probably told her about Bill. If she was really interested she would call me."

"Maybe she is waiting for you to make the first move. Nora can be stubborn sometimes." Viki commented.

"Yeah, it runs in our family," Susannah replied, wondering if the ball was in her court when it came to Nora.

"Susannah, I'm sorry if taking Todd on as a patient has caused a rift between you and Nora," Viki knew that Nora had never forgiven her sister for treating Todd.

"Viki, there has been a rift between Nora and me since we were both living at home. If it wasn't Todd, it would be something else. I'm sure if I introduced her to Bill she would find reasons why we aren't right for each other. I think it might be best to just let things be. She knows how to reach me if she should want to talk." They both turned when they heard Tom starting to wake up.

"Hi, is it morning?" Tom then remembered to look at his watch. I can't see it so good." He rubbed his eyes with his left hand. They could tell he was still groggy and his eyes were not fully focusing yet.

"Yes, Sweetheart it's morning. It's eight-thirty."

"Has it been twelve hours yet?" They knew he was eagerly awaiting Téa's visit.

"Téa should be here any minute," Viki said, hoping she was right.

"Where's Coach?"

"He getting showered and changed," Viki informed him.

Tom looked down at his pajamas. "Can I get washed and dressed now so I'll be ready when Téa comes?"

"You sure can. Frank is right outside, I'll get him for you," Susannah offered.

"Hi, Buddy," Frank said as he came into the room. I hear you are anxious to get going so, let's head for the bathroom. We need to wash your hair today."

"Do we have to? It's already twelve hours." Frank didn't know what he meant.

"Tom is expecting Téa and twelve hours is when she told him she'd be back," Viki explained.

"You want to be nice and clean when Téa gets here, don't you?" Frank asked.

Tom shrugged. "I guess so."

"Okay, so let's get going and we'll try to make a quick job of it, okay?" Tom nodded and headed off to the bathroom with Frank.

Tom was more fidgety than usual. "Hey Buddy, hold still. I don't want to get soap in your eyes."

"Do you hear Téa yet?" This was about the seventh time he asked Frank that.

"No, but it's hard to hear with the water running. Let's get you rinsed off and dried and dressed and then we can brush your hair outside, this way if Téa is here or she comes you'll be the first know," Frank suggested to his squirming patient.

"Okay," Tom started to stand up.

"Whoa! Hold it Tom. Not yet. Let me finish rinsing you off." Frank smiled at Tom's excitement. Frank quickly and proficiently rinsed him down and then, instructing him to get up slowly. He helped him out of the tub. He had him dried off and dressed in record time. "There we go, Bud, all clean and shining." Frank helped him back out into the room. Sam had come back. He and Viki were going to wait for Téa to come and then head out for that breakfast.

Tom immediately scanned the room for Téa. "Where's my watch! He panicked when he looked at his bare left wrist.

"Right here, Sweetheart," Viki handed it to him from the top of the dresser.

"Honey, remember you took it off before you went into the bath?" Susannah reminded him.

"Oh, yeah, I forgot." Viki fastened it to his wrist. She noticed it was so big on him. The strap had been fastened to the last hole and yet it hung on his wrist. Todd's body was still skin and bones. Tom looked at it. He pressed the button and activated the voice. "Nine with an 'a.m.' that means it's morning. Téa's not coming." Tears welled up in his eyes.

"Who says I'm not coming?" Téa called out as she walked in the door.

"Téa!" Tom ran up to her and threw his arms around her. She lifted the bag she was carrying in the air so he didn't crush it. "You really came to see me like you said you would." Téa realized that for Todd and most of the alters someone's word didn't mean very much. How many times had their mother told them she loved them and would never leave them only to walk out on them forever. When someone actually showed up, is when they believed the promise.

"I'm sorry, I was late, Tom. Remember I promised to bring you something special for breakfast. How do chocolate chip pancakes sound?" Téa rattled the bag slightly.

"I love chocolate chip pancakes! Todd would get them sometimes, but he would get them at night, when he couldn't sleep. He would go out and walk and go to this place and get chocolate chip pancakes. Then sometimes he would start to think about stuff and I got to come out and I really liked them." Téa remembered all the times Todd would leave the house in the middle of the night because he couldn't sleep. She was happy that sometimes he chose a better alternative to walking down by the docks or in the park in the middle of the night.

Téa noticed Tom kept looking behind her, toward the doorway. "Tom, are you looking for something?"

"Is Kevin coming, too?" He asked meekly.

"No, Kevin is probably at work." They all noticed the relieved look on Tom's face.

"Tom we just have to get your hair brushed and then you can have your breakfast," Frank told him and went to get his brush from the drawer.

"I'm hungry, can we brush my hair later?"

"'Fraid not Buddy, it'll dry tangled and then it will hurt to brush it out."

"I wanna start doing stuff with Téa. I never get any time to do what I want," Tom complained, sullenly.

"What if the first thing we do together is to brush your hair? I would like to brush it for you. If that's all right with you?" Téa asked.

Tom smiled a big smile. "Okay! Frank, can Téa brush my hair?"

"Sure, she can?" He answered and handed Téa the brush.

Tom sat on the bed and Téa gently ran the brush through his silky hair. She remembered how many times she'd had an urge to do that to Todd after he would come out of the shower. He would usually just run his fingers through it a few times and be on his way.

"Téa, can I brush your hair sometime? It's real pretty. It looks like my mom's. Todd thought so, too. He liked to look at your hair. He wanted to brush it too, but he was too chicken to say so. I felt bad for him. He always got real mad at himself because he would chicken out of saying what he really wanted to say. Our mom used to let us brush her hair. I always did a real good job."

Téa wondered if it was somehow inappropriate to agree to that. Yes, Todd was her husband, but Tom was just an innocent seven year old. Then she realized innocent was the way it was intended. He just wanted to recreate brushing his mother's hair. "Sure you can brush my hair sometime, if you like. I think that would be very nice." Téa continued to brush out his tangles. She thought about what Tom had just said. She remembered catching Todd staring at her hair sometimes. He used to joke that they had similar hair. Téa wondered how many other things Todd wanted to say to her, but felt too afraid or too embarrassed to mention.

When Téa got all the tangles out she smoothed his hair behind his ears. "There we go. All done. Now, why don't we get to those pancakes before they get cold. I do have enough for everyone here. Sam, Viki, Doctor Hanen, would you care to join us?"

"Oh, no thank you, Honey, Sam and I are going to the cafeteria for breakfast," Viki said quickly, knowing that Tom would probably like to be the center of Téa's attention.

"Doctor Hanen, would you like some pancakes, or perhaps you Frank?" Téa called out to him.

"No, thanks. I'm fine." Frank called back.

"So am I. I've already eaten, but thank you," Susannah answered.

"Looks like you're stuck with just me," Téa kidded Tom.

"I love being with just you, Téa." Tom's openness and honesty touched Téa deeply.

Viki brought some milk and juice and then she and Sam headed for the cafeteria. Susannah headed for her office to prepare for Viki's session.

"Let's sit at the table," Téa suggested, pointing to the small round table in the room. She took out a Styrofoam container and took the lid off of a portion of the still hot pancakes. She placed them in front of Tom. She did the same with her portion. Téa took some packets of syrup out of the bag and some plastic utensils. "Would you like some maple syrup on your pancakes?"

"Yeah, I like lots of syrup," Tom answered, smiling at Téa.

"Me, too," Téa smiled back and started to open several packets of syrup. She tucked a napkin into the top of Tom's shirt. Remembering how nervous he was about spilling anything on himself. She tucked one in the top of her blouse as well, so he wouldn't feel like a baby. Tom poured three syrups on his pancakes. Téa noticed the tremor in his left hand seemed a little more pronounced. Tom drank some of his milk and then picked up the fork and tried to break off a bite size portion of the pancakes. Téa wanted to offer to help Tom, but, once again, she didn't want him to think she thought he was a baby, so she kept quiet, but it hurt her to watch him struggle with the plastic fork.