Not bad, I let the mango/peach/pear/turkey-flavored juice fill my dry mouth and wash away the rancor of stale pantyhose and rum. Nothing but refreshing despite the poultry aftertaste.
�Most of acquisition�s are not so eager for Nozzwhaks or nozzwanker�s Billy_Klub. Your appreciation for our biological warfare byproduct and reject catalog will be happily noted. �
Hmm, what kills you makes you stronger I suppose. The only after effect I have suffered is that all aftertastes have time shifted to become pre tastes�. And those tend to start a full three days prior to my ingesting the catalyst fare.
�Pardon me uh, sir� I beckoned as he was about to wheel away.
�What is the purpose of my captivity here? Why am I being held prisoner?�
He bent close to the cage a nametag rhythmically tapping now, it read �Clorthax� Joe. Another smile like a fatally wounded cherry blossom.
�For a tail fitting Billy_Klub, both you and Mr Guss are going to sport next years designer models to assure Dagnomidians may safely use them skiing.�
�Oh, I see it makes perfect sense now.� �Clorthax� joe was wheeling away now
�Um �Clorthax� who is Guss and uh can I at least have the latest issue of better gardens and sea shanties or parrot fancy? � He continued wordlessly.
�You mean you could TALK ALL THIS TIME�and you didn�t even make a little squeak?!� a small but furious little voice bounded from the left lens of my eyeglasses.
I almost spat my heart out. That ladybug! I had been staring at its chitinous ass for almost an entire day and it can speak better than most OB kids.
�I..I-I-I can talk of course I can talk!�
�Than why did you stand around like a drunken chimpanzee with no pants on. Great I�m locked up with an idiot!�
�Wait a minute you could have said hello to y�know! And I�m not the only one who has found him self without trousers!� I can�t believe a ladybug has me on the verbal defensive.
I shot straight up which reminded me of my 48 hour hangover, ice picks driving into the remnants of my skull.
�Oh forget it little bug, Sorry where I come from you don�t exactly meet that many talking insects.� I settled back to my sack lunch, inside I found a smaller sack written in tiny crayon strokes was the name Mr. Guss.
�Uh here this must be yours.� I removed my glasses gently placing them on the acrylic basking spot, which served as my bed, I also placed the tiny sack lunch down. He scurried over and nussled right in.
�I would fuck a dung beetle six ways till Tuesday for measly beer right now you know.�
�that�s lovely Guss.�
I tried to shake the image from my head �How long have you been in here?�
I think he said three day�s but he could have said that I was a homo and my mamma is the poster girl for beer goggles, he had so much debris in his mandibles it was nearly unintelligible.
We ate in silence for the most part. Then we slept under the baking lamp.
Three days latter I had found out how to portal out of the cubical. I don�t think I could explain it, except for you just, well um, you point your hand in one direction than it disappears, then you follow a tube or something. Left right inways and downways it felt like miles. You never run out of hand though. It�s like infinite reach, but I eventually found my way through this hyper tube to a pull tab and pop we where outside. As much as I enjoyed the sack lunches I figured I would much rather get vaporized by security than sit another day, basking without pants or soaking in the water dish.
The rest of building was more like a corporate office, except it was six miles worth of cubicles rather than a few hundred yards. Baskets on wires hung overhead. I figured them to be for mail but on closer examination they could carry a number of large beings across the office space.
�MY e-mail must be jam packed� I thought as I passed an open node. I started to shudder uncontrollably. I would take two shaky steps forward but then jitter three back. Before I knew it I was planted in front of the node typing away.
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forward
�Clorthax� Joe came back with a brick and an earth telephone book. Which he rested firmly three feet away and in mid air outside of the cage on top of the pull tab.
A low tech lock, insulting realy. I did the same when Suki (One of my favorite gecko�s) kept escaping..
So a week past until the night the heat lamp over my cubical went out. The lower portions of my body went utterly numb from the incongruent chill that claimed a room so full of electronic equipment. Guss was holed up in my breast pocket which did little to ease my discomfort, but that smug insect paid no or little attention to the injustice of his actions. I thought on several occasions that it would be best to eat Gus, to put him in my mouth and just chew�
When I finally found my way to sleep I had a visitation from a jagling or goddess. My slumber was Very light and fragile If I where to shift my weight I would snap into the cubical again.
I was squatting in a field of tall brown glass, which was very hard on the feet and needed to mowed or blown or ground whatever it is that one does to prune glass. A house rose forms a silvery green shaft of light, a Perfectly spherical garden was the first thing I noticed and then it was the shape of the house that caught my attention. It was half Victorian and one sixth chrome muffler the rest I couldn�t quite describe in all honesty.
I was compelled to knock on the front door, up the prim little path and knock as if I had utterly no choice in the matter.