The Curriculum Vitae of
Mr. Arthur Procter.
Born.
28th June 1952, St James' hospital Leeds.
Sex.
yes please
To the utter horror of my father and elder brother I was born Male! They we're so disappointed at me not being female that they never talked to me or my mother from that day onwards. Fortunately for me I grew up bigger, stronger and healthier than both of them put together.
Raised.
In the Woodhouse area of Leeds until six years of age when we relocated to the far superior area of Burley, Leeds 3 where we actually had our own ( outside ) toilet.
Education.
Attended the world renowned Brudenell Secondary Modern mixed sex school for
young thugs ladies and gentlemen.
Achievements.
Held the school record for being the most abused pupil by one teacher in a single lesson. Was caned three times for the heinous crime of looking out of the window on three separate occasions during a snow storm. On showing my father the resulting bruises and blisters I was told I deserved it. Lost interest in education!
Certificates.
One length swimming certificate.
Marital status.
Presently doing life with our Sheila, one previous conviction!
Children.
Two by previous conviction, two step children and seven nine grandchildren.
Assets.
Home owner.
Ford Escort driver
Several bank accounts.
Paid up credit cards.
Pension
Liabilities.
Mortgage. Non!
Ebay fees
Hobbies.
Cycling.
Roller skating.
Swimming.
Dog walking ( fierce German Shepherd )
D.I.Y.
Spoken languages.
English, Spanish, Turkish.
Past employers / employment
1967 Electrical contractor. ( Rewiring Tetley's pubs, great! ) - SACKED, NEVER THERE
1968 Neon sign erector. ( Maintaining Tetley's pub signs, great! ) - SACKED, NEVER THERE
1968-9 Tailors cutter. ( Factory full of young women, great! ) - LEFT, FOR A CHANGE
1969-70 Hi-fi distributors. ( Great perks ) - LEFT, FOR MONEY
1970-2 Bus conductor. ( Those were the days ) - SACKED UNFAIRLY
1973-5 Safety glass manufacturer. ( Smashing job ) SACKED FOR FIGHTING!
1975 Machinist - Shoe manufacturer. ( what! ) REDUNDANT
1976 Cloth room assistant. ( Yawn! ) LEFT, BORED
1976 Quality control and technicians assistant @ Rank Radio. ( Brilliant ) REDUNDANT
Ask for details.
Present
Last (but one) employer / employment
Kirkstall Specialty Axle Division
Spicer Clark - Hurth
Off - Highway Components Group,
Abbey Road,
Leeds, Ls5 3NF.
England.
Position.
Manager. (lol)
Employment commenced - September 1977 to 27/02/2003 - REDUNDANT
Last employer/employment
Selling Italian furniture on the internet, yawn
Position - all sorts
Employed from September 2003 until January 2004, LEFT, BORED
P.S. Damian, it doesn't matter how many times you fill in the poll with 75k I'm not coming back.
Present employer - ME!
Feel free to explore my website.
Legal disclaimer - Everything on this page hilarious as it may sound is completely true, anybody telling you anything different is a lying scumbag and will be dealt with by my legal team.