Bring Me Home
by tir-synni
You're going to have to excuse this. I'm a big angst fan, in case you didn't
notice. Don't worry, it'll lighten up
soon. Severe cuddle warning.
Chapter III: Nightmares
Even in sleep,
Zidane's tail refuses to loosen its hold.
I'm not complaining, nothing of the sort. I'm just wondering how I'm supposed to get
his food. Well,
I sigh and
cuddle against Zidane's sleeping form.
His blond head was resting on my chest, and I could feel his breath
rustling my clothes. For the hundredth
time since he fell asleep, I check his temperature. I can't help it. Even his breathing is strange, kinda harsh
and wheezing. It's like he's having
trouble sucking in breaths. I tried
hoisting him up earlier, but all he did was cuddle against me and choke. I quickly settled back down, and when I did
that, he quieted. I haven't made any
more moves yet.
"What's
the matter with you, Zidane?" I ask him, petting his hair. He's like a kitten. He loves being petted, so I do it whenever I
get the opportunity. "You've never
been sick before. You never even got
colds like the rest of us. Why are you
so sick now?"
One hand
stroking his hair, the other feels his forehead. His temperature is still high, but at least
it isn't any higher than earlier. That's
a relief, at least.
A soft mewl
interrupts my thoughts, and I refocus on Zidane. His pretty face is scrunched up, and his tail
tightens painfully around my thigh. I
recognize what's happening: a nightmare.
Zidane's never
told me what he dreams about. Most
times, he didn't remember. Sometimes, I
was sure he did, by the haunted look in his big blue eyes. But he would never tell me. Were they different ones? Were they always the same? Is this a repeat of an earlier
nightmare? But he had not had them for
years. Did his excursion with Kuja bring
them back? I ground my teeth
together. Just another reason to get
pissed at Kuja.
"It's
okay, Zidane," I coo softly, rocking him in my arms. "Blank's here. Shhh!
Blank's here."
The Genome
mewls again, and I kiss his temple gently.
Even sweaty, his hair remains silky soft under my lips. I close my eyes at the thought, still rocking
him. The movements come
automatically. Even years dormant, I
still know what to do.
"It's all
right, Zi," I whisper. "You're
back with Tantalus. You're back with
your family. You know we won't let you
go this time, right? Of course you
do. You'd be the same way with us. You always are. Tantalus takes care of each other,
remember. I'll take care of you
now. Shhh!"
Aw, shit. I can feel his temperature rising against my
skin. Zidane meows and shudders against
me. I don't know whether it's his
nightmare or his resulting movement, but I have to wake him up now. I scowl.
Dammit, I was hoping to let him sleep until the Boss and Cinna
returns. Then I wouldn't have to leave
Zidane, and Zidane would still have something to eat when he wakes. Oh, well.
I can't let his fever get worse.
"Zidane!"
I hiss, shaking him. He growls softly at
the movement, and I'm sure now that all feeling is gone from my leg. Now that I think about it, I think it's been
gone for a while. "Wake up. Come on, wake up. Zidane!"
With a gasp
and start, Zidane's eyes fly open. He's
still trembling, but mostly, he calms down when he realizes where he is. He looks up at me, and he smiles
brilliantly. Next thing I know, there's
a happy Genome curled up in my lap, his tail now wrapped around my waist.
"My
hero!" he quips. "Tell me, do
you charge an hourly rate?"
It takes a
moment for me to get my head together.
Zidane's in my arms. He's awake
and he's aware and he's in my arms. He's
holding me. Whoo, boy! It's different when he's conscious.
I swallow
hard. "Wh-what?" I
stammer. Real smooth, Blank, I mock
myself. Really smooth.
Zidane flashes
me another smile, even as he relaxes back.
"So you aren't my knight in shining armor? Please, it better not be Steiner. No, wait, he'd be a knight in rusty armor,
wouldn't he? Ha!"
I can't help a
smirk. Yep. No matter how much time has passed, he's
still my Zidane. Damn, how long have my
thoughts been possessive like this?
"What was
your dream about?" I ask, changing the subject.
Zidane's smile
fades, and he cuddles against me. I
happily let him. "I never really
understood them before," he comments softly. "I used to never remember them. I only knew I didn't like them. And then I started remembering them, but I
still didn't understand them. All I knew
was I hated them. I never really
understood until we went against Garland.
Then the nightmares came back."
He glances up at me from under blonde lashes, his look mildly
reproving. "You weren't there to
keep the nightmares away."
I stare at him
in shock for a moment, even as I hold him tighter. I...I never imagined Zidane would think
something like that, nonetheless say it.
It had always been Zidane that watched out for the members of
Tantalus. That's how come we took it for
granted that, when the Boss passed away, Zidane would ultimately be the leader
of Tantalus. I knew I helped him with
the nightmares, but I didn't realize it had such a big effect on him.
Zidane doesn't
notice my surprise. "My
nightmare...it was a memory," he whispers softly. "I never knew that. I never knew for sure until...." Then he shakes his head sharply. It doesn't erase the pain in his expressive
eyes.
"Zidane?"
I ask worriedly. Zidane's moments of
weakness are few and far between. He
allows very few people to see them. He's
a natural protector, and he believes the people under his charge won't have
faith in him if they see him as weak. I
guess it comes from living on the streets before Baku picked him up. I have the same habit.
Zidane smiles
weakly at me before attempting to haul himself out of bed. I immediately put a stop to that. The little idiot! He should know better!
Zidane shoots
me a hurt look but settles back.
"I'm hungry," he announces, looking up at me expectantly. "And thirsty. I can't explain if I can't talk."
I can't help
but roll my eyes. Moment of weakness:
lasted all of thirty seconds. "I'll
get you some food and drink, your highness," I reply drolly. It doesn't matter if he could explain or not. Zidane could always talk.
Smiling
wickedly, Zidane replies innocently, "I've been told I could pass as a
prince of the Genomes. Does that
count?"
Apparently he
gets bored with my dumbstruck gaping, because he waves me imperiously out of
the room. That does it. When he's back on his feet, he's never
playing another royal role in a play. It
goes straight to that brat's head.
Huffing, I
nonetheless hurry to get Zidane's things.
If after all these years of silence, Zidane will finally tell me the
source of those horrible nightmares, I'm not going to stall it off. Despite what Marcus thinks, I'm not stupid. That's Cinna.
And his hammer. I wrinkle my nose
in disgust. What the hell is the deal
with that damn hammer?
Shaking my
head mentally, I bring back some water, bread, and cheese to Zidane. When he makes a face at it--I knew he was
going to do that!--I smirk. "You're
sick. Sickees don't get heavy
food."
Zidane
growls. Even after all these years, I
still remember the phrase he used on me when I got sick. Heh heh.
Payback's a bitch.
He nibbles on
his food in silence as I sit beside him.
I bite back a smile as I notice he immediately wraps his tail around my
leg again. I'm not the only one clingy
after the long absence. I hate to see
when the others realize he's alive.
Especially Ruby. Ha! That should be some fun.
After a bit,
Zidane raises his head again. I
recognize the look in his eyes from countless past occurrences. He's ready to tell his story.
"I had the nightmare again that first night with Kuja," he reveals. "Wrapped around me like he was, he couldn't miss it...."