I’m Not In Love With Heero Yuy!!

 

 

 

Relena grabbed a jacket off her coat rack and headed out the door and into the arms of the waiting press.    Multiple inappropriate questions were asked, among which was what her favorite toothpaste/condoms/lipgloss flavour was.     She was fed up with the press butting in to her private life.    It wasn’t as if she was a hot supermodel or a movie star.    She was just a chaste Vice Foreign Minister.     Yet somehow she was voted the universe’s hottest female last year.     There must be something about her that she couldn’t see.    Here she was every man’s dream and hadn’t been on a date in two years.    There was something very wrong with this picture.

 

The press continued on with their foolish questions.     “Are you in love with Heero Yuy?”     Warning signs went off in her head.     Why would they bring Heero up?    She hadn’t seen the man in the longest time, 3 days, 2 hours, 38 minutes and 26 seconds… well 29 seconds now.    Not that she was counting.     She was most definitely NOT in love with him.

 

She pushed her way through the crowd and got into her black Ferrari.     Thank God she had finally reached the age where the pink limo was no longer appropriate.    She hated the damn thing, and thanks to that she now detested the color pink.     When she had told the salesman to give her something with a suitable color 5 years ago she had meant black, or white, instead she got stuck with the god-awful pink the world seemed to love.     That was back when she was 15 and didn’t understand that a bit of money would have corrected that mistake.    She was so naïve then.

 

Tires squealed as she pulled into the driveway of the Preventor’s main office.    She was now working among her friends as a peace negotiator, and she loved this job more than anything.    She was able to spend more time with the people she cared about… Hilde, Duo, Wufei, Sally, Trowa, and Heero.    NOT that she cared about Heero more than the others.

 

She showed her badge at the front door and breezed into the large building and got into the elevator.     She settle into her large office which doubled as her VFM (Vice-Foreign Minister) office and put her feet up on her desk for a ritual 5 minute reprieve from the world.    Sally stuck her head in the door and smiled at the peaceful picture the 20 year-old blonde presented sitting in her natural habitat.

 

“Fight.”

 

“Between who?”

 

“One of the new trainees and Heero.”

 

“Heero?”

 

“Yeah, I thought you might want to see Heero kick ass as usual.    You seem to like seeing him show his male machismo and flex his muscles as he bends some poor sop into a pretzel.”

 

“He’s quite a specimen.”    Sally just raised an eyebrow.     “That reminds me.     The press asked me if I was in love with him.”

 

“How did you convince them you aren’t?”

 

“I didn’t say anything.    And I’m not.”

 

“I didn’t say anything.”

 

Relena gave her a sour look and followed her out the door and down the hallway.     In the corridor Heero was calmly standing still as his opponent circled around him.   The other man obviously didn’t know anything about Heero, or tactics.    It was amazing he was still standing.     Relena met his eyes from across the room just as his opponent attacked.

 

Any lesser man wouldn’t have seen it coming while he was distracted, but Heero is DA MAN.     He easily sidestepped his foe and knocked him to the ground.    Relena cringed as Heero went in for the kill.

 

“Stop!”

 

Heero halted mid-air and didn’t touch the poor man on the floor.    The trainee rose to his knees and smirked.     “Ha, I told you he was so disillusioned by her love that he wouldn’t harm anyone in her presence.    Why don’t you do us all a favor you stupid controlling woman and let your boy-toy be a man.”

 

Relena met Heero’s eyes and the gap between them seemed to close.    She walked over to the fool on his knees and grabbed him by the hair.

 

“I try to do you a favor so Heero wouldn’t kill you and this is how I get repaid.   Well listen here you asshole, I may always take the peaceful solution, but I’m far from stupid.    You want to fight Yuy then go ahead and die.    I won’t come in between this pissing contest.”    For good measure she pushed his head back until he collapsed on the floor.     She turned around and strode through the whispering crowd.

 

Sally turned and hurried after her friend.     Relena turned back to the stunned group and snarled.    “And I do NOT love him!”

 

Sally grabbed her shoulder as soon as they were out of earshot.    “What’s gotten into you today?”    Relena wretched herself away and stalked into her office, slamming the door behind her.     Wufei joined Sally in the hall.

 

“What’s up her butt today Sal?”

 

“I think she just figured out how deeply in love she is.”

 

Wufei walked away shaking his head and muttering about ‘onnas.’     Duo gleefully popped his head out from a shadowy corner and made his way towards his best-bud.   At the same moment Hilde picked the lock to Relena’s office and snuck in, only to have a shoe thrown at her head.

 

“Oh, its you.”

 

“Friendly welcome you give your friends.    I’d hate to see what you would do to your enemies.”

 

Silence.    Relena was starting to take on some of Heero’s more annoying traits, like threatening people, throwing objects, and the monotonous silence.

 

“What was all that about Relena?    Your usually not violent, and people have insulted you and Heero worse than that before and you always kept your cool.”     Tears started to roll down Relena’s cheeks; she just couldn’t stop them.

 

As Hilde comforted her best friend Duo was annoying his.    “Come on Heero, she loves you.”

 

Silence.

 

“I heard Sally tell Wufei.”

 

Silence.     Duo smirked and decided to have a bit of amusement with Heero’s inattentiveness.

 

“She wants you to have sex with her.”

 

Silence.  

 

“I thought maybe Hilde and I could stop by and we could have one big orgy.”

 

Heero whipped out his gun and pressed it to Duo’s head.     “I know you think I’m not listening to anything you’re saying, but I’ve heard every word.    Don’t give me another reason to pull this trigger.”

 

“Oh man!    Why do I always walk into these things?”    As Duo hightailed it out the door Heero smirked and put away his gun.    Well he had his fun for the day, it was time to have a talk with the princess.    He encountered Trowa in the hall.     Trowa blocked the way to Relena’s office and nudged Heero back into his.

 

“Heero, I have to talk to you.”    The only thing that kept Heero from walking out the door was the worried look on Trowa’s usually stoic features.    Trowa settled down in a chair and started to talk.    “It all started when…”

 

Relena was currently walked back to her office from the cafeteria.    She balanced a tray of food on her hip as her cautiously opened the door.    Halfway up the stairs she encountered the trainee Heero had beat into a bloody pulp going down the stairs.    She was feeling malicious enough to stick out her foot and trip him as he went by, muttering he was wrong about her loving Heero.    The poor man went down in a tangle of arms, limb, Band-Aids and casts.    Wufei looked up from the bottom of the stairs and reminded himself not to piss the pacifist off.

 

The trainee tried to get up and found he had broke another bone.    No one took pity on him and helped him up, they just stepped over him, (namely Wufei) and so he just laid there in a tangle.   Relena continued on her way to her office and started to prepare.

 

 “… And that’s what happened.    So what do you think Heero?”     Heero blinked, stunned.    That was the longest speech Trowa had ever made.    He spoke more in the past 10 minutes than he had the whole time Heero had known him.    Which may be a slight exaggeration, but not by much.   

 

Relena stepped into her bathroom and slipped on the floor.    She skidded across the floor and stubbed her toe on the toilet… hard.    She bit back tears as she splashed water on her face as she muttered that she did not love him.

 

Heero would have taken 5 seconds to tell Trowa where to stick his problems but that wasn’t the friendly way, and deep down he was actually pleased that he was trusted enough for people to come to him with problems.   So he spent 5 minutes giving advice on something he didn’t know a thing about.

 

A florist arrived at Relena’s door and handed her a bouquet of white roses.    Relena sniffed them and made a big to-do about the card.    Sally came up behind her and peeked over her shoulder as she paid the delivery boy.

 

“You sent them to yourself didn’t you.”

 

“Why would you ask something like that?   Of course I did.   Do you think a guy could write a card as eloquent?”

 

Heero finished his advice and headed towards the door.   Trowa looked at his watch and panicked.    “Wait Heero!   I’m not done.”

 

Heero snarled and sat back down.   Trowa desperately sought after a topic to talk about.  

 

“Is it natural for your thing to have blue dots?”

 

“Your thing?”    Heero asked incredulously.

 

Trowa stayed silent and mentally cursed his imagination.

 

“Blue dots?”   Heero coughed and ducked under the table as he snickered.    Trowa waited patiently and rolled his eyes, as Heero’s snickering grew louder.    He hoped she appreciated his efforts to keep Heero in the room while monopolizing his image.

 

Heero came up for a moment reprieve and successfully kept a straight face.    “No, I think not.”    He shook his head.   “Blue dots.”    Trowa snarled at his smirking friend.

 

Relena looked out into the street and pulled her blinds shut.    She was in no mood to see the sun right now.    She moved away from the window and accidentally stepped on the stem of one of her roses.    She hopped around for a moment and pulled the rose from her foot.    Life was not fair!

 

Heero finally got away from the mortally sick Trowa and strode to Relena’s office.    He opened the door and encountered her sitting in a dim room.

 

“Relena?”

 

“I’ve accepted it Heero, do you?”

 

“What?”

 

“My feelings for you.    Heero, I love you.”

 

Silence.

 

She figured the best way to handle his silence was to meet it with her own.   Soon they were in a contest daring each other to speak first.

 

“Why?”

 

“Because you’ve always been there to pull me back from my naivety.    Your mine, and I’ll never let go.”

 

“Relena, I…”   He walked into her outstretched arms.   

 

The door closed on this little scene as Duo, Trowa and Hilde tried to look in to see what was happening.    Wufei walked by and muttered about dishonorment.    Duo put his arm around Trowa’s shoulder.     “Blue dots aye?”

 

Trowa reacted by pulling Duo’s braid and snapping his head back.   Duo fell to the floor at Wufei’s feet.    Wufei muttered about people falling at his feet today and went to step over Duo but instead looked down at his friend.    “What did you say about blue dots?”

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

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