Disclaimers: Oh my gosh, do I SOOOOO own Gundam Wing

Disclaimers: Oh my gosh, do I SOOOOO own Gundam Wing. I'm also a billionaire, gorgeous beyond belief, and the Queen of Heero Land where all the men love me and look exactly like Heero-chan. Did I mention I'm also the only woman in Heero Land? (Seriously tho, if you haven't guessed by my very sarcastic tone [which please say you have so that I can say the human race isn't doomed] then I don't own Gundam Wing or any of its characters. I do own Heero Land tho, and it's the happiest place on earth. Just beware the detonation buttons placed everywhere!)

Authors Notes: Okay, I know all of you who like this story want to kill me and I agree with you, but did you seriously want something that sounded like garbage? For three months now I have been in what you could call GW-withdrawal. I could not, for the life of me, write something that sounded like GW characters! I lost sight of who Relena, Duo, Hilde were. Even who Heero-chan was! When I went to put chapter 6 up about two weeks ago I discovered that I wasn't reading GW but something entirely different. I was reading "Mental Wing", a fanfiction about everyone having a midlife crisis in their 20's. One in their 4's too. It did NOT sound anything like what Heero would have said or done. I had taken their names and looks but inserted a different, and thouroughly despicable weak person. I hated it so much that without even trying to change the tainted thing I threw it away. And let me tell you I NEVER do that. I always keep stories I don't like so that later I can go back and make them into something I DO like. This time I didn't even try to. After that I refused to watch any other anime than GW and didn't read anything else but GW fics. By doing this I remembered and embraced the real cast of GW, and not too late hopefully. I hope that you will still be interested enough to read this and not kill me before I finish this series (which will not be long in coming. I finally know how this is going to end, yay!). Now please enjoy this and feel free to lecture me on how stupid I was. I deserve it. Thanks.

PS: Since I WAS such a butt getting this out really late, this chapter will be alot longer than the others (about 2 chapters worth of info). For a warning, time goes back for one short section and you can tell by these signs: // Hope you enjoy it!

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Never Let Go: Chapter 6

By Jadet

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The night's icy fingers weaved their way through the gray sky during their daily journey to cloak the moon. Though it hadn't snowed all day, soft white flakes began to dance on their way down to join the quilted ground below. A golden moon viewed all of this atop his throne of thick gray clouds, imperiously smirking at the van pushing blindly through the snow. Just to make things a little more interesting, the moon willed the wind, a playful thing, to tease the van on the slick roads. It obliged happily and taunted the van on each side, making sure to throw the snow directly in their faces. The moon almost laughed when it saw the van's puny attempts to ward off the snow but stopped when it reflected off unshed tears. Almost immediately the wind stopped playing and the moon gazed sadly down at the woman behind the glass shield. She sat as proudly as she could, her hands folded in her lap. Though she didn't cry, she didn't make any attempts to remove the glassy surface on her once warm azure eyes that were filled with pain. Behind her in the van the moon saw others with similar expressions on their faces. Except one. The man driving the van that dared the snow had eyes of ice. Ice that would not soften but only hardened into stormy blue rocks. The moon shuddered and hid behind a fat gray cloud. It did not want to be around when that man found whoever or whatever was making his eyes so cold.

Relena held herself as straight as she could muster and clutched her hands together and tried to regain her composure. After her outburst in the department store they had purchased the items she had only moments before liked but had no desire to now, and quickly left from the store. The stares of all the women in the dressing room followed her even now, and Relena forced herself not to blush with mortification. The fact that Heero, after paying, had stalked out of the store with all the bags under his arms and leaving an emotionally distressed Relena to Sally, Catherine, Hilde, and Une was even worse. Was he so disgusted with her now that he didn't want to be around her?

She sniffled softly and missed the gaze Heero shot in her direction. How could she have been so stupid? Of course she wouldn't be pregnant still. She had been gone, or 'dead', for five years! Obviously she wouldn't have been pregnant for all of this time. She would have had their child about six months after her 'death'.

That thought still didn't take away the sting from realizing she had lost her child a little over four years ago. Actually sting was an understatement. Her heart was crumbling under her internal tears that she refused to shed. Truthfully all she wanted to do was curl up in a fetal position and sob. But she didn't allow herself the luxury. Instead she beat herself up inwardly. How could she have just only now realized that she wasn't pregnant? Shouldn't she have guessed or known with her fashionably late motherly instinct that she wasn't?

Relena bit her lip and gripped her hands tighter. I guess I just got used to the thought that I was pregnant, she thought. That made sense in a weird, pathetic way. To her it hadn't been more than a week since Heero had left on his mission with Duo. Her mind knew that it had been five years, but so far her heart hadn't admitted to it. Nothing had changed in her mind. Heero was still as handsome and silent as she loved him to be, her friends acted just the same, her house looked reasonably the same. Nothing had really changed. Yet everything had changed. Heero wasn't the same man she had married -oh god she thought as she added the five yeears she was gone- eleven years ago. He had changed. His eyes were darker, his mood more like a deep well that hid rage until the right moment. He was more protective of her too, which she didn't think could have been possible. Her friends had changed too. They got married, had children, made themselves lives that would support and nourish them. Even her house had changed from the haven she and Heero built together into a fortress that Heero had locked himself inside of. Things had changed. Yet even as she knew this mentally, her heart rebelled against the idea. And that is why she thought she was still pregnant. Her mind knew what her heart refused to acknowledge, and her heart had been the one to tell her these last few days that she still was pregnant.

But the blood from her monthly had awakened her painfully from her dream world.

Relena glanced up from where she had been staring out the window when Heero pulled into their driveway. The other women in the car unbuckled silently and exited the van, clutching their new wardrobes in their arms. Relena and Heero sat still in the car, watching the others walk up the steps and are swept up into their respective husband's arms. Relena wished Heero would do that, sweep her into his arms that is. She desperately needed his strength right now because she knew it was only her experience as a foreign minister and a former princess that was keeping her wall of discipline up.

"When?" Heero's gruff voice broke the uneasy silence, and Relena sighed mentally. She lowered her eyes to her lap and watched herself clutch them tighter together. She didn't have to ask what he meant when he asked when, she knew.

"About my second month. I was three months when I disappeared."

She could feel Heero's eyes close in his silent pain and heard him run a hand through his stubborn chocolate locks. The tears she had been holding back so well until now began to clamor more fiercely to be released. She fought them back with an inward growl. No!

Heero grunted and turned to face Relena, who by his observation, was finding great interest in how many ways she could fold and unfold the material of her pant leg. He felt an almost sad smile twitch at his lips but he forced it aside. Reaching out a hand, he tilted her chin up so that he could look her in the eye and felt a grim satisfaction that she could control herself this well. Most women he knew would have been having a breakdown right now and crying hysterically. Hell, most women would have swooned. Not his Relena though. Heero did allow a smile to curl his lips then. His Relena, yes, she was his once more and he would never let go of her again.

"Did anyone else know?" Heero murmured. Relena gazed up into his beautiful Prussian blue eyes and felt a few tears leak past her carefully constructed wall but shook her head. Relena was amazed to see a soft smile cross Heero's lips as he brushed a gentle thumb over her cheek to wipe away her tears. "Shhh, don't worry Relena. I'll protect you and I'll find whoever did this, I promise."

Relena nodded and leaned in when Heero did and felt her lips touch his. Relena allowed herself to cling to the kiss in desperation and let some of the fear she had been stroking settle onto Heero. He welcomed it and sent back some of his strength. A small smile settled on her lips as she deepened the sweet kiss into something more passionate. Heero would fix everything, she knew it. He promised.

That thought still didn't stop the agony in her heart however.

They both pulled back at the same time and Relena found Heero had kept her cheek cupped in his palm the whole time. She leaned into it with a sad smile.

"Thank you, Heero."

A light tap on Heero's window brought both of them out of the trance and made them turn to find Duo grinning at them. Heero scowled slightly but it couldn't hide the slight smile on his face. Opening the door so that Duo could talk to them, he reached over and grabbed Relena's small hand in his.

Duo grinned at the look of contentment on his best friends face and beamed at Relena. Heero had literally gone through hell when they all thought she had died. Now that she was back though, maybe Heero would allow himself to start living again. He certainly deserved it. Shaking his head, he cleared his throat. "You two okay?"

The both nodded. Duo allowed the smile to melt off this face and turned to look imploringly at Relena with a small frown. "Is it true?" Was what Hilde suspected right? He asked mentally. He didn't want to say it out loud however. Poor 'Jousan had been through enough these last few days.

Though he didn't show any outward emotion on his face but worry, inside Duo was seething. As a child he had never had any lasting friends. After Solo, Father Maxwell, and Sister Helen all died, he had thought that any person who was his friend would die. He still thought so at times, especially at night when no one could hear his silent sobs. That thought didn't stop him from being extremely possessive when it came to his friends and family though. He was a very possessive man by nature, and although internally he didn't think he was worthy of such joy, that didn't stop him from keeping a tight hold on it. So when other people intervened and hurt his friends, he was instantly furious on their behalf. And if this type of interference wasn't included in that, he didn't know what was. So he was more than angry at whoever dared to hurt his best friends. He was incensed, and as God as his witness, he would do whatever in his power to make it better for them. Not a single thought that had dominated his mind since finding out Relena was alive was shown on his face however. He kept those thoughts to himself. What would people say if they thought that comical, witty, and very dense Duo Maxwell thought murderous thoughts? He knew what they would say, or what they wouldn't say, he thought with a wry smile. It was as certain as the fact that Hilde couldn't cook that they would all run away screaming like chickens with their heads cut off. Wait, that didn't sound right...

Relena nodded and sighed but felt some warmth seep into her hand when Heero squeezed it. She smiled back at him then turned to Duo. "Yes, it came to my knowledge today at the store."

Duo ran a hand through his hair, glad none of his 'interesting' thoughts weren't showing on his face. "Well that's just great. Even more bad news that we didn't need." Leaning back he glanced at the cottage door then back at Heero. "And I hate to be the bearer of even more bad news but a new situation just popped up."

Heero frowned. "What?"

Relena shuddered inwardly at the barely controlled anger in her husband’s voice. Yet it was oddly comforting. When Heero was angry, nothing in the world could keep him from fulfilling what he set out to do. That was what they needed to. As much as she hated to admit it, she wasn't going to be much help in this, having no memory of the last five years and all. Relena sighed.

"Well..." Duo scratched his head. "We found a kid hiding in your room with a loaded gun. Kinda sick from the looks of it but we have found out he was sent here to deal away with you Heero. Shut up right after letting that bit out. Don't think he would have even said that if he hadn't been half asleep at the time. Serious little guy." He shrugged, but his piercing violet eyes told the rest of the story. "Don't know much else 'cept that kid does look awfully familiar."

Relena sat up straight and gazed fearfully into Duo's eyes. "You mean...?"

Duo frowned sadly at Relena then turned and stared right at Heero. "I think we could call him mini-Heero."

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The little boy was angry. No angry wasn't the right word, he was downright pissed off! In the back of his mind he was glad his mommy couldn't hear his thoughts. She would have boxed his ears for saying the p-word.

Changing position under the heavy blanket a fat blue haired lady gave him, the little boy glared daggers at the man responsible for making him mess up his mission. The Chinese man glared back, holding another little Chinese girl in his arms. The little girl glared at him too but wasn't a match for her father. Her blue eyes looked too pretty.

The little boy sighed and looked longingly at where his gun lay on the table. After he had been found by the grumpy man -sleeping no less! The master was going to bbeat him for that one- they had taken the gun away from him forcefully. The little boy smirked when he remembered it had taken the grumpy one along with two other men, a spiky haired guy and a blonde, to actually wrestle it away from him. That thought didn't cheer him up too much though. He was still sitting next to a big fire in what he assumed was the family room, surrounded on all sides by his enemy with his gun lying across the room. Not to mention his target was going to come in any time now and see him. The boy sighed again. He really messed up this time.

He knew he was going to die. That much was obvious. All the stories about the man said he was heartless, and the boy trying to kill him probably wouldn't cheer up his mood. The little boy didn't fear death too much, in truth it would be a relief, but it would make his mommy sad. It would make her cry too, and the little boy couldn't stand it when she cried. Oh, he wished he could have found his daddy. If he had, then he could have had his daddy help him get his mommy away from the lab and she would have been happy.

The little boy erased all the wistful thoughts from his head when he heard new voices approaching. One he recognized as the loud guy with the braid that had tried to talk to him after they found him. The other two, a man and a women, sounded familiar. He frowned. No, the woman's sounded familiar. But that couldn't be, it had to be because he felt funny and missed his mommy that the woman's voice sounded familiar.

The braided man entered first, a frown on his face. He glanced over his shoulder and motioned at the people standing behind him. "He's right here."

A sneeze caught the little boy unaware and he missed the entrance of the other two people. When he finally looked up he felt the glare on his face grow hotter. His target was watching him with a surprised look on his face. Idly the boy wondered about the man's reaction but dismissed it as shock from having been so close to death. The little boy began to sneer then turned to look at the woman clutching at the man's arm. He froze and all his training was forgotten as his face drained of color.

"Mama?"

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"Mama?" The room echoed, shock clearly written on their features.

Heero felt like someone had punched him. He was looking at a mirror image of himself that was calling Relena mama. Did that mean…. Fighting to control his shock that was threatening to buckle his knees, he turned to catch Relena's alarmed gaze.

"Mama?" She whispered, a slight tremble in her voice. Her head began to feel light. Mama? She repeated again inwardly. She turned to look at the small boy nestled underneath a blanket who was staring at her in such horror her heart began to ache. Slowly her knees gave out and she slumped to the floor. Heero followed her, his arm around her shoulders, staring at the boy too.

He looked just like what Heero would have looked like at four or five. Exactly. The same Prussian blue eyes, the same wild sun kissed chocolate hair that fell in his eyes. Even his face held the potential of a strong profile Heero had. He looked just like Heero.

The pain that had been nagging at the back of her head all day suddenly exploded and Relena fell forward with a scream, clutching at her head. Chaos immediately issued. She was only vaguely aware of it for the pain that was pounding in her temples was excruciating.

The pictures however, weren't as painful but very disturbing... and terrifying.

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//The day was too fine to stay inside. Relena smiled to herself as she tied up the laces to her skates. As she sat she watched giddily as her breath condensed into thick white clouds as they escaped from her mouth. Giggling to herself, she tied the last knot and stood up with flourish. And since today was too fine to stay inside she would go for a nice skate around the lake.

Humming a random tune, she adjusted the coat around her shoulders and bundled up. She didn't want to catch cold for two reasons. One, it wasn't good for the baby. Two, Relena giggled as she thought it, Heero would pitch a fit if she did. That man worried about everything!

Shaking her head, she felt a smile bloom on her face. A baby. She and Heero were going to have a baby in about 6 months time. Joy blossomed in her heart and Relena laughed happily. What a feeling! She couldn't believe their good fortune. Six years of nothing then boom! Heero was going to be so pleased! Relena laughed again when she thought of what her husband's reaction was going to be. She couldn't help but think that it was a good thing there weren't any more Gundams. Her husband might just be tempted to self detonate in panic!

Stepping onto the ice carefully, she made sure to test her weight before gliding onto the silver surface. Snow lightly fell around her and Relena twirled expertly on the ice, laughing at the feeling of the soft flakes melting on her skin.

She was so happy, and she had no doubt that Heero would be too after the initial shock. How to tell him though without making him start muttering in Japanese? She contemplated this the rest of the hour she skated around the pond. By the end she wasn't any closer to finding a way.

How could she tell him and not freak him out?

Shaking her head, she stepped off the ice and quickly undid her skates. It was the work of a moment to slip them off and put her feet into her favorite snow boots. They were man's boots, Heero's old ones to be exact, but they were warm and scarred and now an indefinable shade of brown. She absolutely loved them.

Walking up the slope toward her cottage she missed the sound of footsteps behind her. Too late she whirled around, warned by a 6th sense she had developed after all these years of living with Heero. The two men didn't back down when she noticed them and reached out to grab her.

Relena turned and darted for the cottage looming in front of her, her hands clutching the skates to her chest. Behind her she could hear the curses of the men trying to follow her but stumbling in the snow. She sent a prayer of thanksgiving that she had learned to identify soft spots in snow.

Trembling with nerves, she reached the steps of the cottage when a hand darted out and grabbed her around the waist. Shrieking, she lashed out with her hands. The skate caught the man's cheek and he let out a howl of fury as it sliced it. The man threw Relena hard into the steps and she gasped for breath when it knocked all the air out of her lungs.

Heero, where are you? Relena screamed in her mind and struggled to get up and into the house. She had to get to a phone, she had to call someone for help, she had to....

The man's fist slammed into the side of her head and Relena stifled a cry. She flew back and cracked her head against the stone steps. Relena caught a quick glimpse of the bloodied face of her attacker before she blacked out.

The man had the whitest hair, like the snow, and the greenest eyes. Green eyes that seemed to shine and emit evil like the devil's.

And black skinned hands.//

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As soon as Relena screamed and fell forward, Heero grabbed her around the shoulders and called out her name in a rough, shaking voice. "Relena? Relena!"

All around him his friends were screaming at him to find out what had happened. He blocked out their voices and continued to call her name. Underneath his hands Relena trembled and let out a soft whimper. Heero felt his worry and terror increase. He could feel Duo's hands trying to pry him away from her so that Sally could examine her, but didn't understand what they were trying to do. What was wrong with her? Was she dying? That thought terrified Heero and he began to shake her and call her name more forcefully.

Duo finally managed to drag him away and Heero watched what Sally was doing half consciously. He felt like he was floating somewhere else and watching this happen to someone else while his mind chanted: "this isn't happening, this isn't happening!"

"You leave my mommy alone!"

Heero turned to look at the little boy being held by Wufei. The boy was struggling against his captor and crying out his mom's name, tears running down his face. Heero watched himself start to walk towards the boy when he was suddenly jarred back into his body. Someone was watching them.

Heero ran forward just as the little boy got loose from his captor and began to run towards his fallen mother. He grabbed the boy just as the gun fired. Glass shattered and screams erupted as both man and boy tumbled across the room to slam against the wall.

For one person the world ceased to exist and they fell into darkness.

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End of Chapter Six

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Well? How did you like it?? Hehehe, I like where this chapter ended, don't you?? Buwahahahaha!!! Arigatou minna for reading this and don't forget to review!! ^.~