Today i had my first experience with a mental institution. Kind of. I'm not sure if you are aware, however, there are several sort of "halfway" houses run by (the state) (private organizations) which take individuals who have just left a mental home, and re-integrates them into society. Threshold Rehabilitation Services
is run four blocks from Alvernia, so my Psych course took a quick field trip down there today. What we saw wasn't what I expected.The building is a large, brown warehouse. It looks like a factory on the outside, and, truthfully, it looks like a factory on the inside as well. People go to this center to learn how to keep a steady job again. The state passes small projects (packaging popcorn tins, etc) onto Threshold, and then they employ people recently released from mental homes. The center re-teaches the act of commuting to work, holding down a job on a set schedule, and then going home at the end of the day. Many employees live in Threshold-operated residence community homes.
My class walked around on the floor where the employees worked, and it was a nuthouse (no pun intended, har har). People were yelling across the room to one another. Work was being done. It looked, in short, like any other shipping factory in the world. Until you look at the people.
One woman grabbed my arm and started clapping. Unsure what to do, i allowed myself to be pulled away from the rest of the group, and the woman grabbed a Lerner's catalog. She opened the magazine up, pointing to a dress, smiling. I smiled, asked if she liked it. I think she nodded, but i can't be certain. Anyway, the woman spent the rest of the tour clinging to me, and later introduced me to her boyfriend. One of the girls from my class, rochelle, said she looked like she had a crush on me. I politely replied that she was taken, thank you.
I don't know. It was strange being there. I'd never seen anything quite like it. It was a blast to the senses, seeing these things, hearing these things. In truth, the only experience i have with homes for mental illness came from one flew over the cuckoo's nest. i didn't know what to expect.
And then the tour guide was saying they were taking volunteers. And she told us that we could also possibly work in the residence halls, monitoring people and planning a schedule for them. You take Ted bowling one night. You take Cindy to the mall the next. You help them cook their meals. In short, you live with them and make sure they don't screw anything up.
My Psych professor talked to me about the opprutunities available. If i become a volunteer, I will gain a full credit for my troubles. On the other hand, the jumbled mess of emotions I felt when the woman in the factory grabbed my arm and showed me the dress in the catalog...i don't know. I don't know if i can do that every day, in and out. One girl from the class started crying. I never felt like breaking into tears, but...i don't know what i felt. I never pitied them, because in truth, they weren't sad. One girl said that she thought we were in a zoo as guests being encouraged to point and stare (figuratively speaking, of course). Our teacher responded that by and large they love getting visitors and that they didn't feel like we were mocking them at all.
I never thought they were being put on display for us either. I didn't feel sorry for them, i never felt superior to them.
So what did i feel?
If i take up the volunteer plan, i'll get the extra credit, however, i can also help out in the residence halls, as a paid employee. I don't know how much they pay, but i'm guessing it'd have to be better than the amoco. At any rate, i'd live in the residence halls with them. They have overnight shifts, when you stay up all night and take care of the residents if they need help in the middle of the night. I would help them to manage their checkbooks (haha, me who has had two bounced checks already), divy up their freetime, and basically live happy, healthy lives.
I don't know if i'm ready for all this responsibility.
But if this is what i want to do, if i want to dedicate my life to psychology and helping others, than this is a great opprotunity to get my foot in the door at a great center. At any rate, on monday I'll be getting the number to call if i want to help out. The big question is now, what do I do with it?
in other, brighter news: it's here. awww yeah.