gonna wrap this up
in a box.
all of it.
the regrets,
the never-to-bes,
the memories,
and mail it to you.
mark the box "my heart -
fragile."
see what you think.
see what you say.
would you ignore it,
like you seem to every day?

i told you i'm here for you,
but i tell that to everyone.
of course,
with you,
i mean it.
unburden your soul,
complain about school.
i don't care.
it's all poetry to me,
from you.
bitch,
moan,
whine,
just notice me.

___

feeling lonely, as is the norm lately.  gotta get to work soon.  i work with nichole and rick tonight.  rick and i made fun of kim last night.  it was funny.

never had to present in english today.  so, for the most part, i was up until 3:30 am this morning for nothing.  i got two and a half hour of sleep for nothing.  i wish i could just fall back into bed.  but i can't.  because i've gotta work.

this sucks.  20 minutes till i start.  last night rick was like "show up anytime between 3:30 and 4," because i wasn't scheduled, so of course i'm gonna show up at around 4:15.  i need the hours, and shouldn't really complain.  with any luck, sheetz or someone will be up there for a few hours.  someone cool.

been re-thinking my position on all sorts of things lately.  i'm changing, evolving my personality.  there's a lot of things i'd love to change about myself, lots of things i don't want to change, and lots of things i'm indifferent to.  i think i'm going to work harder at identifying the things i wanted changed and wonder why i've done nothing up until now to change them, make the evolution happen.  this past year and a half has brought across a lot of changes in me, and i can see more taking place any day now.

fourteen minutes until i start.  the worst thing about this is sitting here, seeing the minutes tick by.  ever think that every minute that passes is one you'll never get back?  it's just one more until the time you die.  eerie.  i'm gonna turn off my brain for the night, stop thinking, and go up to work.  peace.  seyonara.  i love ya.