Muse's by Rel

Disclaimer- Any Voyager characters belong to Paramount. The muse's belong to their writers.

Dedication: Dedicated to Becci, Charon, Bec, and Jo for lending me their muse's and to my own muse Harry * g *

 

“You think yours is bad?? Mine keeps Chakotay clones! Those poor things have

nothing to do but worship her, it sickens me." Eris sighed, sipping her

coffee deeply. There was nothing she liked more than spending a day with her

fellow muses talking about their writers. Today she was having lunch with

Bert, Bec Hanna's muse and Rel Prince's muse a Harry Kim look-a-like

called....well..... Harry. Her own writer was Becci Crofts. "I keep on and

on at her to write but she just keeps on with those clones instead! Not that

they aren't attractive mind....."

Harry nodded "I know what you mean, mine hasn't written since Christmas! I

blame it all on the blow-up doll!" Bert looked up from his 36th coffee of

the day "I don't think mine has any of those, the only thing that distracts

her is coffee, every five minutes another cup! She can't write anything cos

she has to get coffee and then she forgets what she's doing! Not that I

don't like being her muse though.....she spoils me rotten, though I think

she may have me addicted to coffee and is possibly using it to control me in

a Vorta- Jem'Hardar kind of way. But I don't mind." He drained his coffee

cup and started on the next one. Eris sighed "Why can't we have writer's who

actually listen to us? We ought to go on strike!!" Bert looked horrified "We

can't do that! Who would give us our coffee??" Eris shrugged "It was only an

idea, I just wish they gave us a little respect! We work our butts of giving

them fic ideas and helping them yet they can't even be bothered to write the

damn things!" The other two nodded but Harry said, "Yeah but what are you going

to do about it? We need them as much as they need us!" Eris looked defeated.

 

"When are you going to write it?" Becci waved her hand in the general

direction of her muse "In a minute!! I'm chatting in case you hadn't

noticed!" Eris looked annoyed "No! You are going to write it NOW!" Becci

turned around "Look why don't you go pester someone else I'm trying to chat!

Why are you so annoying?" Eris looked shocked "Me? Annoying? Excuse me! Your

the one who named me after the Greek goddess of Discord! Your totally to

blame for any annoying traits in my character!" Becci grunted and turned

back to IRC leaving Eris seething.

"Bec? Don't you want to write fic?" Bert asked "Nope." He looked puzzled

"Why not?" Bec didn't take her eyes off the computer screen "Chatting." Bert

looked defeated "Oh........are you sure you don't want to write fic?" Bec

nodded "Positive. Why don't you go take a nap in the comfy bed I made you

and have another cup of coffee?" Who could argue with that? thought Bert as

he snuggled down in his duvet.

"Rel you have fic to finish." Harry stood beside her attempting to get her

attention "Uh-huh, sure." He sighed, "Rel you're not listening to me! You

really have to write some fic!" Rel shook her head "No I don't. Don't try

and convince me ok? I'm having too much fun chatting so why don't you just

stand there and look gorgeous ok?" He sighed. God these writers were

infuriating at times!

Eris, having finally given up on Becci, had wandered round to the house of her good frends, Musette and Bob who were Charon's muses. They to were eager to complain about their writer. " I keep on and on at her to write but noooooooooooo she's to busy. I try and get Bob here to back me up by he doesn't want to." She leant over so only Eris could hear her "He's really boring, hardly worthy to be called a muse at all! I would have complained to Charon by now if he wasn't the splitting image of Xander off Buffy. I think that was the writers doing……." Eris nodded "It sickens me when writers make their muse's in the shape of actors, its worse than the Chakotay clones!" Musette just nodded absently, she was used to Eris's rants. "We have to do something!" Suddenly her earlier idea returned to her "Musette I think we should go on strike!" Musette looked startled "What! Why? I know I complain about my writer but I wouldn't want to leave her and in case you've forgotten without the writers we can't exsist! What if they discover they don't need us? It would be terrible!" Eris looked exasperated "Don't be stupid Musette! They need us as much as we need them and they can't write fic without us you know that!" Musette nodded "Still………..isn't going on strike a little………well extreme?" Eris shook her head "No way! They treat us like dirt!  They give us stupid names, we accept it. They ignore our fic ideas , we accept it. They make us work our hardest then can't find the time to write the goddamn fics, we accept it! Well I say the line must be drawn here and no furthur! We will not be treated like slaves anymore! They will have to learn when we say write fic we mean now!!!" Musette stared at her for a moment "You know that speech sounds awfully famil…………" Eris grabbed her arm and dragged her to the computer where her writer was sitting with Bob "Do it now!" Musette swallowed dryly and said "Uh………….Charon?" Her writer didn't answer but Musette continued under the stern gaze of Eris "I'm leaving you until you decide to treat me properly. Come on Bob lets go." Bob looked vaguely confused but followed her out anyway. About five minutes after they'd gone Charon finally looked up from the computer "WHAT?!?!?!?!"

 

"And then they said they were leaving and just..well..left!" Charon looked distraught. Becci didn't looked that bothered "Good riddance to bad muse's that's what I say!…… Hey wait a minute……10,15,20,30,40,45,46…………..where's number 47???? I'm missing a clone!!!" Becci gasped suddenly "THAT BITCH TOOK ONE OF MY CHAKOTAY CLONES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH." Becci's scream was so loud it could probably be heard in the Delta Quadrant. Bec and Rel certainly heard it in the next room "What is it?? Brannon Braga? Michael Sullivan?" Bec yelled as she came running in the room with Rel right behind her "No! Worse!" Becci spluttered looking a distinctive shade of green. Rel looked shocked "Worse than Brannon Braga?? Oh my god Becci what is it???" Becci took a deep breath "One of my clones is missing!" Rel looked relieved "Oh one of your stupid clones!" At the look of rage on Becci's face Rel hastily apologised to avoid a painful death.

"Oh I can't defiantly see why she keeps the clones now! They're so strong and manly…" Eris favoured her new 'boyfriend' with a Cheshire Cat smile while Harry rolled his eyes " I can't believe you stole one of her clones! Man is she going to kill you when you go back!" Eris laughed, "Harry, I'm not going back!" He choked in his coffee "WHAT?????? That will leave you writer unable to write!" Eris shrugged "So? I think we're all better off without them." Harry looked round the room where Bert was sitting in a corner muttering 'coffee, coffee' over and over, Musette was staring longingly out the window, Bob was staring expressionless at a wall and the new muses- Kat who's writer was Jo, looked as if she had no idea what to do with herself and Coral's muse, a small tribble looked……… well …………tribble like. "Yeah sure Eris, maybe you think your better off but I don't think anyone else does." Eris shrugged casually dismissing everyone feeling's with a wave of her hand "Give them time and they'll see they don't need those writers. They'll see they're better off on their own. Now I'm off to recruit more muse's to our cause, you guys wait here." And she sailed off  with her Chakotay clone leaving an annoyed Harry behind her.

"More people have lost their muse's?" Bec looked shocked "That means………….no more fic!" Everyone went pale- they hadn't really thought about the consequences of the muse strike up until then. "Everyone's muse can't have gone on strike!" insisted Charon shakily. Bec rushed over to the comp and logged into IRC

:~ Welcome to #jetc : Today's topic is " Where the hell are our muse's? .aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" set by JadeChat on Tuesday 15th June.

Bec: Does anyone still have their muse's???

Clare009: Nope

JadeChat: Mine left hours ago!!

DayaCC: Same here

* Bec screams

Bec: None of us have muse's anymore either!

JadeChat: Us being……..?

Bec: Becci, Charon, Rel, and me

Bec: Oh and Jo in #jetcjr says she's lost hers to

DayaCC: So all the muse's have gone? That's terrible!!

Bec: I know!! I mean this rivals C/7 for sheer awfulness!!

 

"Uh Bec?? Do they still have their muse's or not??" Charon's voice interrupted Bec. She looked slightly annoyed but answered "No! Nobody has their muse's anymore. Its terrible…hang on guys just let me check something.." Bec quickly brought up the JC Index then screamed  in fear before fainting dead away. They all leaned over the comp before seeing the words "There was no new fic to add to the index this month" and following Bec's example.

Meanwhile all the muse's  had gathered in a secret location………….oh ok it was the Fair Haven set. They knew the JCers would never bring themselves to enter it. Hundreds of muse's in all different shapes and sizes had gathered there. "Now we all know why we're here….." Eris started "No we don't!" someone in her audience shouted. Eris glared in the direction of the voice for a second before continuing "We're here because we're fed up of being ignored and then blamed as the reason their not writing fic!" Most of the muse's nodded "So I've decided that for once in our lives we're going to have a little fun! We're off on a tour of the Star Trek universe!" This caused an outbreak of muttering and more than a little confusion on the parts of some of the muse's "How can we do that? That universe only exsists on the t.v show?" Eris nodded, eyes gleaming "And in the heads of the writers, the same place we exist! So that means we're part of that universe so we can visit it!" Most of the muse's looked dubious but Eris was convinced they could do it.

14 days later

Rel sighed, staring at the blank screen she had in front of her. That screen should have been filled with the words of the fic she was supposed to be writing but without her muse it was impossible for her to write. "Hey sis you got a postcard." her younger sister Hannah poked her head round the door and chucked the small square of card at her. It fluttered to the ground and Rel sighed before looking at the strange picture on the front in slight confusion and turning it over to read.

 

Dear Rel

              Sorry I had to leave so suddenly but you know how insistent Eris can be! Anyway as you'll see from the postmark I'm posting this from Risa, we're taking a round the universe trip! Its actually quite fun, we've already been to Vulcan and Betazed. I miss you though, there's no one I can bug about fic! I'm trying to convince Eris that we need to go back to our writers but she's not really listening to me (as usual!) Anyway hopefully I'll see you soon.

                                     Harry

 

Across the country, other writers got similar postcards from their muse's.

 

Dear Bec

                 I miss you lots!! Eris has taken us all off on this round the universe tour but it's terrible! Hardly any of the planets have coffee!!!! We're on Cardassia at the moment where they've never even heard of it! We will be here for four more days so if you can figure out some way to send coffee to an alternate universe please send me some!!!!!!! I think the lack of caffeine in my system is causing me to be jittery and nervous because I practically attacked Musette in order to get the coffee she brought with her. I think I'm going crazy!!!! I really really really really really miss you and coffee!

                             your loving muse

                                                            Bert

 

Dear Becci

              As you have undoubtly realised I am no longer your muse. I've gone on a tour of the universe with the rest of the muse's. You would have loved it and I might have taken you if you'd treated me better! So how are your little clones? Mine's fine, better than fine actually he's superb! I finally see why you keep them around. Anyway our next stop is Kronos so if I'm not to busy having fun I might send you another postcard. See you sometime in the distant future.

                          Eris

 

Dear Charon,

                     Hi its your muse's here! Well Musette writing but Bobs somewhere....So how are you? Although I'm missing you I'm still having lots and lots of fun! We've been to so many different planets, I have to say that Risa was my favourite though! ( I suppose I don't need to tell you the reason for that!) See you at the end of our trip!

    Musette

PS Bob wants to write something

I miss you lots.

                          love Bob

 

Dear Jo

              Hi. How are you? Have you written anymore fic.....oh right you can't without me. Hows the weather? Sorry, sorry! I just don't know what to say, I don't know if you hate me or not! I hope you don't! I've not abandoned you, not really, I'm just taking a vacation and I will be coming back. I'll see you soon

                                          Kat

              

But weeks passed without the return of the muse's and the writers were getting desprete. "I think I've read every single story in the JC Index three times in the last week!" Bec moaned "If this muse strike lasts much longer I'm going to go stark raving sane!" Rel went pale "Bec don't talk like that! Next you'll be saying you're Micheal Sullivan's ex-wife! Oh wait you already did!" Bec deathglared her for a second before sighing "I'm to depressed to even argue!" Rel nodded "I know how you feel, since my muse left I don't feel like doing anything. And theres no new fic to read, nothing to write….its so boring," Charon appeared with more coffee " I totally agree Rel. While our muses are off having the time of their lives we're stuck here totally stressed out by lack of fic!" Bec took her coffee off Charon "To be fair I don't think Bert is having a very good time. He's very coffee deprived." Charon sighed "Well Musette seems to be having the time of her life. It hurts a little to know she doesn't need me as much as I thought." They all sighed and took deep sips of their coffee.

"Eris this is getting ridiculous!" Harry paced around the room "We have to go back, we can't keep this strike," Eris calmly raised an eyebrow, in a Vulcan like gesture "Harry sit down and calm down will you? We're almost at Kronos." He glared at her "No I will not calm down!! You are taking this way to far!" She ignored him, studying her nail polish instead "Eris , I won't let you simply ignore me this time! You do realise your putting all our exsistence's in jeopardy don't you?? If our writers decide they don't want us anymore, we'll simply cease to exsist?" Eris laughed  and shook her head "No writer would ever decide to get rid of their muse! It would stop them from writing forever." Harry ran a hand through his hair "Better no muse than an absent one." The ship shook slightly as they hit Kronos's atmosphere "Stop it!." Musette said tearfully "Stop argueing!!" She stood up and walked over to Eris "Eris we want to go home! Its been fun but enough is enough, we want to go back to our writers, we miss them!" Eris shook her head refusing to acknowledge the fact "No, your just having trouble adjusting to your new freedom." And that was the last she would hear on the subject

.

"I can't take it anymore!!" Bec cried "I need fic!!! I need fic now!!!!!" Becci looked around. Charon was screaming "Give me fic you stupid piece of leola root!!!!" at the computer while Rel was banging her head against the handily placed door and Bec was drinking her 70th coffee of the morning- at bit excessive even for her. "That it!" she suddenly shouted "I'm can't take this anymore!!!" Standing up so suddenly she nearly knocked over one of her clones she rushed over to her wardrobe and began to pack clothes "Becci what the frell are you doing?" asked Jo who had just arrived. She looked questioningly at Bec, Rel and Charon who all shrugged "I refuse to stand by and watch all my friends be torn apart by lack of fic. Its my muse that started this therefore its my responsibility to stop it!...........will you guys come with me?" Charon looked confused "Where??" Becci sighed shoving things into her suitcase "Kronos, we have to stop Eris before its to late!!" Bec looked confused "Hon, Kronos is in an alternate universe........." Becci shut her suitcase and marched over to the door "If Eris can find a way to get there! Come On! We'll go get Coral then head over to Paramount Studios....I have an idea!" And with that she stormed out with four very confused JCers trailing behind her."

To Be Continued...