Poems by Me and Others
Riding My Iron Horse

Painted fingernails twist the throttle
Black leather and shiny chrome
Hair whipping around my face
As I fly down the road

Riding my iron horse

All my senses heightened
I feel the wind brush my face
The heat from the engine rises to embrace me
I smell the scent of citrus blossoms in the orchard
The pungent sage brush in the desert
And the exhaust fumes of the 18 wheelers

Riding my iron horse

The sense of freedom
Independence and confidence
Is totally intoxicating
Unlike anything
I�ve ever known before

Riding my iron horse

I pass a fellow rider
Heading to where I�ve just been
And we exchange the �wave�
Only visible to another rider
I feel an affinity, acceptance
And belonging
That exists only while I�m

Riding my iron horse.

I laugh out loud, and shout and holler
As I twist the throttle I little more
And roar off into the distance

Riding my iron horse
                               regan gawan
ALONE

I WAS JUST FIFTEEN AND I WAS AFRAID
OF WHAT MIGHT HAPPEN IF THEY KNEW
I DIDN�T THINK THEY WOULD UNDERSTAND
I WAS AFRAID OF WHAT THEY MIGHT DO

BUT EVEYONE WHO KNEW AGREED
THAT I SHOULD PROBABLY TELL
MY PARENTS THE TRUTH
AND GIVE THEM A CHANCE
PERHAPS THEY�LL TAKE IT WELL.

MY PALMS WERE SWEATING
I WAS HOLDING MY BREATH
AND MY KNEES WERE KNOCKING
AS I WALKED TO THE FRONT PORCH
AND OPEND  UP THE DOOR

WHEN I STEPPED INSIDE THE HOUSE
THE STORM I FEARED ATTACKED ME
FROM BOTH SIDES AND WITH FULL FORCE
FAR WORSE THAN I'D IMAGINED

MY MOTHERS SHRIEKS AND TEARS OF DISPAIR
WERE SO EXTREME SHE COULDN�T SPEAK
MY FATHER SPITTING OUT VILE NAMES
AND JABBING HIS ANGRY FINGER AT ME

PAIN STABBED MY BRAIN AND PIERCED MY HEART
I COVERED MY EARS AND RAN
DOWN THE STAIRS INTO MY ROOM
AND PACKED A SMALL BROWN BAG

I COULD STILL HEAR THEM UP THE STAIRS
SCREAMING  �WHERE IS THAT LITTLE WHORE?�
�HOW COULD SHE DO THIS TO US?� THEY SCREECHED
AS I FLED OUT THE BACK DOOR

I WALKED AWAY CRYING
INTO THE DARK NIGHT
NOT KNOWING WHERE TO GO
I TOLD MYSELF I�D BE OKAY
I�D JUST HAVE MY BABY ALONE
                                      regan gawan
Life Is Good
     by regan gawa

I have risen from the ashes
Of my self imposed doom
My walking death

I have opened my eyes
my ears, my mind ,my heart

I have found that I can
Repair the damage I have done
To myself, my life, my world

I have found that I am not
Loveless, Worthless, Hopeless

I have learned to feel
And to use the love and power
Of the creative force
That sustains my life
And provides me 
Strength,  power, Hope

I have become
A human being again
A daughter, sister, mother, friend

I have discovered
Another way of living,
of seeing, of feeling, of being

I have a second chance
At life and love and laughter
I am grateful, humble, joyful
  
                        
Hooker Hotel in Paradise
              by Regan Gawan

We feast on shrimp cocktails and fish tacos,
And buy seafood along fisherman�s wharf
We swim in the warm surf and take salty siestas in the sun
We chase away the vendors strolling on the beach
Offering their silver jewelry, straw hats,
cheap sunglasses, and colorful blankets
(No dinero senior, mucho gracias � well.. wait�.how much for this?)
We bargain for shells and trinkets on Shacks 5th avenue
The children rush bare footed in the dusty streets
to wash our windows
Then scramble for a few American coins
Brilliant orange and red sunsets sparkle on the horizon
The hammock swings in the cool breeze on the front porch
And firecrackers boom through the bathroom window
At the Hooker Hotel
                   
HIKE FROM HELL
       dedicated to Kim Watkins
        and the Wild Women
              by Regan Gawan

JUST A LITLE FARTHER
SHE SAYS FOR THE 100TH TIME
THE SUN BEATS DOWN UPON US
DRINKING WATER IS ALMOST GONE

WE WILL SURELY DIE HERE
WE SIMPLY CAN�T GO ON!
SHE MARCHES MILITANTLY UP THE ROAD
A FEW DIE HARDS STILL IN TOW

WE STOP AND STARE
WE CAN�T GET THERE
WE GO BACK
THE WAY WE CAME

TO FIND AN EASIER
SOFTER WAY
WE GRUMBLE
AND CURSE HER

ALL THE WAY BACK DOWN 
TO THE BANKS OF THE RIVER
A PICTURE IS TAKEN
TO MARK THE OCCASION

THE WATER HAS COOLED
OUR THROATS AND OUR TEMPERS
AND WE SET OFF AGAIN
AND THIS TIME
WE MAKE IT
                      
Bowling on the Mountain
                       by Kim Watkins

open past nine
the house is small
lanes are fine
twelve in all

the old goats come early
in matching bowling wear
I'm too young, surely
but their happy we're here

they get younger in time
and a lane is assigned
so with ball in hand
I aproach and stand

awaiting my turn
behind a man rather large
I view with disdain
plumbers butt, big as a barge

and bulge of cheek and gum
on the skoal dipping, butt cleavage bum
from coment I barely refrain
please dont spit on the lane

I'd quit if he had
in a week its only a day
its realy not bad
but it lasts until May

(Ok Regan and Nancy!  I got a hobby. 
Bad poetry & I'm emailing it to you!)
In Memory of My Friend Charlie
               by Regan Gawan


Dis-ease eats away at his insides
Pale skin stretched tautly over his tall skeletal frame
His proud head held high
A burning cigarette dangles loosely from his fingers,
(no point in quitting now..)
Un-smoked, the ash grows long
Eyelids half closed, he sits
in his wheelchair in the sun
wearing two sweaters
(he was never warm enough in the end)
and stares off into the distance
in a morphine induced haze
(but only to kill the pain)
I sit with him quietly and watch him 
and remember him as he used to be
Jolted into the reality of the present for a brief moment
he focuses and sees me,  his gaze holds me
A smile forms on his dry, cracked lips
and a gleam flickers in his eye
And then it is gone
And so is he
                        
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