| "The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt within the heart." Hellen Keller |
| I just adore this quote from a very remarkable woman. To many people (and at times to myself) it seems unreasonable to have spent so much time, effort, and resources on pursuing my goal of having the SRS. Afterall, if that quote is really true then all that I've ever needed in my life to be happy has always been there within me. I really can't explain why I so fervently chased something that was outside of my heart. I felt like I was a happy person, and yet I just didn't feel complete. I was compelled to find a freedom that had eluded me my whole life. I wasn't looking for the surgery to make me happy, or to make me feel like a woman. I knew whom I was on the inside, and I knew the surgery was not going to change that. But I desparately wanted to live my life differently and to be more at ease with my body. I didn't exactly hate my existence, all told I was living a fairly comfortable life. I had assumed that the surgery was going to augment my existence by affording me some newfound liberties. How ironic it turned out to be that it was my heart that received the boost in happiness and the rest of my life turned out to be anything but liberating. The rest of my story will tell a tale of naivety, and joy. My life changed more dramatically than I could have ever imagined by having SRS. Many of the changes were welcome, others were simply numbing and depressing. I doubt I could have ever made it without the comfort of someone who was going through the very same things as I was. <<BACK<< >>NEXT>> |