Today was track day, I was forced to hang around with people I would normally not be with. All of my friends were gone to do track. Lately life has been boring, and today was just another one of those days. Lately, I've been feeling almost as if I have no friends because of the way people talk behind my back and use me to get to the popular spot light. I hate popularity. It ruins people's lives and hearts, if everyone was the same amount of "popularness" then life would be balanced and fun. But not everything happens that way. And I just so happen to be the girl who has nobody to turn to, and nobody to trust. I wish I did, but I don't. I'm still searching for that one person that I have been looking for to help me with my problems and to be my friend. All of the grade 8ts call me poser and it makes me cry allot, but they don't realise my pain, they think its funny. But its not. My cousin is moving up North so I might never see her again. And her and Micheal are my closest cousins ever. If they leave I have nothing. I'm starting to feel that Shawn, Carl and Brodie might be my friends, but then again, you never know. Courtney is my best friend, and she helps me allot! And I love her;) But I don't see her that often:( I need someone else at school that will let me hang out with them or just to talk to when I need to. Or just a caring boyfriend who will listen and make me feel like someone, but then again thats impossible, because everytime I like someone, they never like me back.
-Red
Thursday June 4th 2003
Today wasn't that bad really, its just that the weather isn't that great and the Strawberry fest is tomorrow! Its going to be awesome! I have most of my friends back from before and everything is comming together again. I'm starting to enjoy life allot more and I'm thousands of times happier then Tuesday! But I don't know who I can trust because of what happened... so I think I should be careful. I don't think I should write any names, so sombody told me that sombody liked me... but I don't think he does! If he did then he would show it allot more. But who knows! I guess I'll write to you tomorrow! IF I have time since tomorrow is the fest and its going to be awesome!! I'm so Happy for once!!
-Red
Thursday June 12th 2003
Today must have been... no wait! It WAS the worst day of my life. Today was the feild trip to Pelee Island. Sounds fun doesn't it? Well, it SUCKED! It rained all day and we had to ride our bikes in the rain, I fell off of my bike because I had an asthma attack and I fell in a ditch while my friends ditched me! To make things worse, I had an after shock for sombody and it made me cry because of how bad it was. Jackie's petal for her bike fell off so we almost missed our boat ride home. Then when we got back, I had an even WORSE after shock and I cried the whole time. Now the person that gave me the after shock refuses to talk to me because he feels he is the reason he made me cry. But its all my fault and I feel So bad about it. I feel SO BAD!!! I hate this!!! I don't know what I should do!!!
-Red
Monday June 16th 2003
I found out that at Pelee island all of my "friends" stole from the Faery (or however you spell it)! I can't beleive it! My mom found out too so she doesn't think I should hang ou with girls anymore, when before she didn't really trust me with hanging out with guys!!! lol! But today was alright since all of the girls that stole had a suspension. (including Emily who is extreamly annoying) So all in all, everything was pretty good! My cousin is leaving next week though:( But I want to spend as MUCH time with her as I possibly can before she does leave!!! Well, I'll talk to you tomorrow maybe! Bye!
-Red