obsession

Why am I here?
I cannot tell you
I don�t know myself
I thought long and hard
On that very subject
On the drive here
The recent turn of events
Has a lot to do with the fact
That right now
I am standing outside this house
After the local paper
Announced the death

The house doesn�t look sinister
Quite normal in fact
Could do with a coat of paint
Very ordinary
But the life within is far from ordinary
Ghosts and hidden evil lurks
Awaiting vengeance
A fascinating ability
That darkness dwellers offer
According to storytellers
Old cronies with too much time on their hands
Creating amusement to relieve their boredom

Still
You could say it holds a certain
Morbid appeal
Why am I drawn to this house?
Or is it drawn to me
The answer is inside
I wish I had the courage to enter
Walk up the path in need of weeding
Up the steps
Made of ancient cobblestones
The thought makes my heart race
What a ridiculous notion

Admonishing myself
I open the gate
It creaks like in a suspense novel
I should have known
That would happen
A figure dressed in black
Appears at the gigantic iron door
My heart races
I am sure my legs will buckle
I look into the sinister but sad eyes
�He has gone,� she says
�I know,� I reply
�What am I to do without him?� the woman asks
On a second glance
She now looks not so much sinister but aged and battered
Have a life I think to myself
�I don�t know Mum but you will be alright� I say aloud
As I close the door behind me
Knowing nothing can hurt me inside this house again

What was I thinking after opening that door
what naive thoughts went thru my head
of course things can still hurt me
even after he has gone
he took my love and abused it
left me like a rag doll
that can be owned and tossed aside
when something new comes along
the memories here haunt me
threaten to destroy my very soul
leave just leave
just go away
and I should go as well