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TO Whom It May Concern:

 Sometimes life really, really sucks! It feels like you're never going to be happy. You'll never have anybody to love you for who you are and what you are. It's like your heart is breaking and you want to kill yourself, but you can't cuz the fear is still haunting you and you're helpless, there's nobody, not even one single soul to ask you about how you feel inside and understand your pain. You look at others and get angry at no reason at all, you're frustrated, helpless and you think you're worthless shit dumped by God in this dirty world. Tears do come but does that help? The answer is no, tears keep on falling and falling, it will only make you feel more insecure and useless.

Why? Why is it that everybody is so self-occupied? Isn't there something called humanity or kindness? If you can't help, then why it so happens that you have to hurt others' feelings and look at them disgustingly and say dirty things at them...Why the hell is that???

I just can't understand, you know those people who feel this way, they're tired, tired of everything...tired of listening to unkindly remarks of people, the disgusted looks, the hatred and just everything. Even their family doesn't care. Ok beauty, you win, there's nothing more important than you, people love you and however mean you are to them, they love you, praise you, believe your every word and to those opposite to you ...Oh! I hate to say but they treat them like they're garbage!!!

Sounds disgusting, right? Of course it does, but who cares? Everybody is doing it, what can I say?

I curse these people everyday, I don't care whether it's my dad or my pal but I pray and ask God to make them feel how we feel, how neglected and hurt we feel, and make them see how much pain is inside us, how much we've suffered cuz of them and how many has lost their lives. We can do nothing ... just wait, wait for our day.

But there's one more thing, how hurt I am, only I know and nobody can change it, I trust God and tell him/her everything and God tells me "everything happens for our own good", I don't see what good has it done to anybody but I think, I've learned to be alone and trust nobody, I've gained my maturity but I don't call it an achievement, I just call it a way to live and to defend myself and make me feel proud for that. There's lot more to say as it never ends but I have to stop once in a while.

 

"GOD PLEASE GIVE ME THE POWER TO LOVE, MAKE ME STRONG AT HEART, MAKE ME BELIEVE IN YOU ALWAYS, I LOVE YOU GOD, I HAVE ONLY YOU WHOM I CAN TRUST ENTIRELY, ONLY YOU..."

  -Rebecca.

 

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