REALICIDE
YOUTH RECORDS
Robert
Inhuman
Lyrics 2000
and earlier
* 1,461 (“Misanthropy Machine”)
I
MET YOU IN A ROOM
YOU
HAD A COLOR SHIRT AND I JUST DIRTY GREEN AND BLUE
THE
DETAILS MIGHT BE A LITTLE SKEWED
BUT
THEY’RE JUST CLEAN CUT KIDS I HARDLY KNEW
NEXT
I’M ON THE ROAD IN A BESIDE THE POINT AUTO
I
ON FAR LEFT AND YOU BESIDE ME
NO
QUESTIONS TO ASK JUST CONVERSATION TO HALO
I
SAW YOUR PINK LENSES – A NEW WAY TO BREATHE
WHAT’S
THERE TO SAY ONCE YOU’RE ALIVE
THE
SUN SHINES SO BRIGHT, I LOVE IT UP HIGH
YOU
TOOK MY HANDS TO SILVER THE NAILS
THEY
MATCHED THE RIBBON YOU KEPT FOR ALL TIME
A
LOVE GREATER THAN REALITY
IN
EVERY GRAIN OF SAND EVERY SECOND THAT WEEK
YOU
WERE MY STARS, YOU WERE THE SUN
ONE
THOUSAND FOUR HUNDRED SIXTY ONE
it's D.I.Y. even down to self-censorship
___
- they never stop
stomp on your skull to get to the top
always with a smile and a wave
feeding them suckers the self-righteous slaves
If
you want my attention just make yourself like TV. It's always so cute to see
the efficiency of summer camp assimilation, as opposed to its so-called
salvation. Sundays are now for advertising. Don't confuse spiritual clarity
with emotional impulse. Jesus is a buzzword here.
your name is just a four letter word
defend it with your life cos it's all
your worth
I
don't give a damn - kicked out of a church
a human institution - a four letter word
overdose on birth control
*
SHE HAD A NON (Low Budget Cliché)
sensation yes and i forget
all i am is a trick with mirrors
i reach for the white,
chewing on the not yet
climb this ceiling like a silhouette chandelier
the blood between my knees
drips to the timing of a 64 manic beat
the ___ like a crystal clear breeze
you don't make friends by thinking about me
no sensation stitch regret
digital noise intoners analogue audio smear
fill the bloody holes with a dialect
you nod at me but i know you can't
hear
cardboard replaces the memory of a girl
cheap cartoon violence distracts me, sure, well
blown away of dust, take a moment if you must
patience wearing thin, energy expends in among the din
cut myself on your kiss
had no business swimming in it
the sun has gone down and i retire
tight lips soft skin a physical choir
a burn worse than fire...
i cannot make friends
such adverts they send
i am my own means to an
end
*
"when you give me a present... (i
give you a present)" (Low Budget Cliché)
blood in a storybook
apart
this is the end
this is a muzzle to the best part
an out of tune explosion
every hope and every dream
every might have been
every again and again
all of it blown away in the firey
wind
gun powder sin right where you should've fucking kissed me
now ya ready?
see no fucking stars coming out of me
just this human condition
the color of hell
you could've just called me
you should've tried to love me
this is the end - i double over dazed
it's a shock to my cicuitry
the last chance to be dazzling
hope it lasts - this is the end - this is the end - this is the
end
enter an angel "what?"
someone popped a hole in neverneverland
this someone's got a popgun in his hand
and a cardboard note that read:
"all you had to do was call out to me."
slip and (down)fall of metal on metal
replaced by metal on flesh
"whom do you love best?"
well how red can the edges get?
deeper in (a room for crushed velvet - and human heart)
this organically crushed to f*** part
"whom do you love more than the rest?"
my expression mouthed the saying "sex"
is like a slave drivor
addict kiss the blood blue razors
guaranteed repeat ripe kind
yeah anything to make the victim fall in line
i'm begging you - it's got
to be my time
already - now lift me from all grime
nice and steady, end me - if you're not mine
yeah open my arm alleyway of release
MORTALITY. When you sit back and
stop kidding yourself, life is just waiting to die. It's killing time; it's
going blind. It's building up devices that coax your fear of tearing down. They sooth in adverts. Yeah, it's searching for the
standard, kicking back, and sinking slow. Cos no matter what
you do you still gotta go.
IMMORTALITY. Do you ever think about
immortality; what it could mean? To live for a thousand years, it's unthinkable
when seconds can seem so long at times. Would perception of reality become so fine-tuned
as to evolve the senses, if immortal senses were to never dull? and would we find the mind unlocked if we weren't constantly
running out of time? Could someone evolve into a sure-fire prophet due to
experiencing the redundancy of time first hand? Would the experience of time
eventually come to a stand still? If you're here forever, what's another year
or ten? Like a murderer in jail except this prison is existence. If given
enough time, the mind and existence would evaporate? So
unreal; dreamer's realicide.
tell me how you'll kill your time before you die
don't got a brighter idea, i guess
you'll just pick suicide
imagining the cuts every night
*
TENDER VICE (Low Budget Cliché)
i can kick a larger hole
in you
i can rip your trix off if i want to
i can bite back when you
get so crude
i could break them coils
if i wanted to
hottest bulb to lick the inner thigh
chest like helium, bare and ripe
serpent throat and electric eyes
an automated proportionized high
a sex symbol, shroud stapled down
the softest sheets conceal this drown
she's the plaster over pain
she's my focus and my bane
a solvent to the sight of stains
assimilates all else and reigns
*
I GLANCE 5 HOURS (angelic) Blue Sanctuary (“Day”)
i was standing in a
stairwell
waiting for a name which evades my mind
you stopped me there, the way you spoke
did the box reach you, oh i hope
asked about a sound on a tape
i mailed to you before i left
we stand, maybe an hour
and i spite the passers-by
between glances at the sky (that's you)
you had a jean jacket, your shirt was light blue
wings of a pixie upon your back, stars beside your eyes
silver stars such as your eyes
hallucinated copper all over me
and maybe you loved me
maybe
...you
took me out on the streets
just let go of the fear to be seen
cos it's
mono-all-for-nothing on the only chance
too much added up, there was no otherwise
so we passed the spies
and the devils in their bestfriend
guise
to a church - blue sanctuary
you lit a candle for me (my sanctuary!)
stuck a star on me, played for keeps
and full-fledged cunning
smalltalk, most precious i've known
silence so perfect built up to:
"you draw a girl that looks like me
she's got a halo and she sees things
from the corner of her eye
sometimes holds a gun, and wings of white..."
for the first in a long time i gave
straight answers:
"yes, no, yes, no..."
that is love, and just maybe you loved me
occasionally push the hair from my face
you always seemed so close to cry
maybe you wanted me in whole or
just to overlook a lie (i don't care)
i gave it all to you -
everything!
and on that evening everything it was worth!
just like Jessica you said you'd take my chance
but instead you broke me in two
one half went stale, the other consumed.
*
BREATHING BODY (Low Budget Cliché)
immerciful thief, immerse me in chickinnery
i surrender every morsel
of my mind to be a casualty
cos even if you've never see
me in the light
i got a superphaserphocus and some terminal illness insight
what i am stings to the bone
and i only grow sicker when i'm left alone
i could find a girl that
looks just like you
i could kiss her ruby lips
and choke that girl until they're blue
i've got a chest like
breathing cardboard
a body i bet you've seen die by the
sword
all carved up baby with a grin on my face
remember who threw me to the butchers in the first place
i'll scavenge every secret
your public overtreads
i will suck the toxin from
these wounds, suck every shade of red
gnashing on the nice times, we shared the shivering blue
i will cut until you cry
and i will break you
the spotlight serration from your lips to my arm
and i reached to pull myself from the
swarm
i can almost feel my
fingers on your face
your eyes starving like they were misplaced
you scattered yourself doll, stripped and sold
and now you're just a hole
when you're caught up in the moment you'll sentence to death
you'll stretch, you'll rape, you'll die for the current
i loved you for years
through a window you shut
and i'll learn to love you if you're
bruised and you're cut
cos if you're more than
white skin
you'd flick the hammer to me and you'd let me give up
*
(Low Budget Cliché)
i'm low
love: a gated glass half filled capsules
ov serene, doll i'm low
sheets of fastfoward worn bullethole
streaks in the feet
i'm holy low, doll i'm hollow
love: and believe you me those fuckers fuck her
with a smile in my teeth
as each drops like rot dominos
the gleam of your glory lies gravel i
knew
i knew not to give a fuck what
you think or what you value
together: dragging on through
pulling the victim from arson
meant as self-incineration
(he's one counter-insurrection)
i'll get you high
roll the smile in my teeth
roll my chamber child with the brake
collapse your need yeah reuptake
spotlit mist inhale
vocational doors slam vacations in jail
A
PRIVATE DARKNESS WHICH I DISGUISE AS THE JOY IN LIFE (Realicide live 2002)
i live in a screen with a
slick little princess fantasy
each day she shines light and the moon at night
i live framed by imagining,
she kisses me in my sleep
i live dedicated to conveniency
feathers of silk drowning in fine silt
her cool breath close in makes my name wilt
the dream shields me from living in obscenity
have you ever met someone with a switchblade for a tongue...
i have lost my voice
repeating these lines
an icepick in the arm of an asshole
with the nerve to wind the clock
"the burning clock of time"
i live each day in hope of
leaving myself behind
i write her so many
letters (addressed to myself?)
"my dear: i hope this finds you
undressed and in poor health
sincerely yours and you alone do i
adore..."
if sex lets you down it's love that you can settle for
around every corner over every shoulder under every tile
her footprints paves the coldest miles (braver or insane i'm getting older!)
i've seen her smooth slender
however it has been a while
you know what holds me down? a thick
lead mental shroud (she smiles)
i live in a screen with a
slick little princess decomposing
each day she keeps me from the light and drowns my thoughts all
through the night
i live in a box of sheen,
walls of blades, yeah walls to cut me!
she kisses me with the razor in my sleep?...
oh my angel, my soul-slashing girl
we're the only two, the only two kids in the world
screaming won't fight this skin-tight privacy
each friend of mine is a thorn in me
...ring
me out, do me in, i'm ready today
i've nothing to live for
anyway
goodbye, i won't miss ya.
goodbye, goodbuy, [a word too
profane]