Gather �round the fire and let uncle T.J. tell you a story. It was back in 1475 and I was at the age of 102 (Okay, here starts the rhymes).
I was hanging one day up down at the mall,
I was thinkin� I was drinkin� I was havin� a ball.
When I stood straight up and gave a snort,
And I made my way on down to the food court.
I was enjoying the smells, the sounds and the sights,
Then a woman told me to get out from in her thighs.
I pushed and heaved and pulled my head right out,
And then I saw a guy I knew named Tom Brigout.
He said, �Hey man I�m livin� on nickels and dimes.�
Then I looked at him and said �Good Times!�
I started walking, and then I stopped,
Then I started again (I know, it doesn�t rhyme, give me a break).
I went to the pet shop and heard the sounds
That reminded me of the time I went to the pound.
There was whinning, barking, squawking and squeaks,
Wait, that was me and my woman last week.
I went back to the food court and ordered some fries
And she told me once again to get my head from her thighs.
I wandered down the stairs to see what people had to sell,
But when I got there I felt like I was in hell.
I ran out of that place with a really loud scream,
Then I woke up and it was all just a dream.
I was wondering if I had anything to do at all,
And then I headed up down to the mall.
I arrived at the mall in all its glory�
Gather �round the fire and let uncle T.J. tell you a story.